A Hutch-shaped Hole in the World?

© Caroline Gilpin – 18th October 2022

"Hutch."

"Yeah?"

"I'm gonna find Callendar," Starsky made the serious promise without hesitation.

"Well, do it, buddy, because I plan to be around for a hundred and forty-eight years," Hutch responded, briefly echoing their conversation on their way to pick up Jake.

Jake, who was now dead.

Starsky stood rooted to the spot as Hutch was wheeled away by the nurses. He'd made the promise to find Callendar (so that the doctors could reproduce the antibodies needed to halt the spread of the disease and save Hutch and so many others) and he knew Hutch knew he would give it his all. What was the phrase? Do it or die trying. Hutch trusted him totally, trusted that he would try. His words showed that. Believed that he would succeed? His eyes said something different.

Starsky wished he could think of something more to say, anything that would take away the look of hopelessness he'd seen in his partner's blue eyes as he'd locked gazes with him. But what else was there to say?

That this couldn't be happening! Not here in Bay City, not in this day and age and not to his own partner. People who lived and worked in a modern, first world country (with first-rate physicians and scientists on hand) didn't find themselves suffering from a disease that was to all intents and purposes an incurable plague. That just couldn't happen. It couldn't...and it certainly shouldn't be happening to Hutch.

No. This was all some sort of bad dream and at any moment now he would wake up, Starsky thought, desperately willing it to be so. But then he became aware of the cold metal of Hutch's gun and warm, leather holster weighing heavily in his hands and realised it was all too real. It was happening. It had happened to Hutch.

In that moment of realisation, Starsky felt the weight of his partner's weapon sink into his hands, and like liquid mercury run through his body and settle solidly around his heart.

Hutch was infected and, if Starsky couldn't find Callendar within forty-eight hours, his partner would die.

If the doctor said anything more to him, Starsky didn't hear it. He left the room and headed out of the hospital. Driving the Torino, he made for the Metro building, but was surprised when he arrived after just a few minutes. Or at least it seemed to have taken just a few minutes. He realised that he must have driven a large chunk of the journey on automatic pilot. He didn't remember which route he'd taken, but somehow he'd arrived in one piece.

He looked at the passenger seat, where his partner should be sitting and felt the full effect of the frightening void of Hutch's absence. With trembling hands, he snatched up Hutch's holster and gun and hurried away from the car and into the building.

As he climbed the stairs, his thoughts scattered like so many pieces of rice dropped onto a tiled floor. With his heart beating abnormally fast in his chest, he made straight for Dobey's office and let himself in. Dobey was on the phone and frowned at the interruption then froze when he saw Starsky's face.

Starsky dropped Hutch's holster and weapon onto the desk and turned away to lean against the wall by the window. He closed his eyes and tried to calm his heart rate and his trembling hands. He had to pull himself together. His partner was counting on him.

He heard Dobey finish his conversation and took a deep breath; trying to draw his scattered thoughts back together so that he could fill Dobey in and get as much help in his search as possible. His quest would only succeed if he could pull himself together and deliver what he'd promised.

With the department and Dobey's help there had to be a chance, however slim, of finding Callendar in time. If not...if not...Hutch would die a horrible, drawn out painful death and he...he would lose his partner, his best friend, his brother and the best man he had ever known.

If he failed, there would be a Hutch shaped hole in the world and that just couldn't be.

However hopeless it might seem, Starsky knew he would find Callendar...because he had to.