Description: Numair begins to court Daine while they have a serious talk about his past affairs. A feast is held to honour those who lost their lives during the war.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. Everything belongs to Tamora Pierce.

Author's Note: I promise I will fully explain the meaning of the orchids in a later chapter.

I know it's only a theory, but Numair gets teased for going after shapely blondes which doesn't correlate with what we know about him in his youth in Tempests and Slaughter, so I came up with a reason for it.

From my impression of Daine over the books she's a woman who knows her own mind, and once she's decided something, that's it. She knows she loves Numair and for her, there's no question about what she wants. He is the one who's hesitant, unsure and basing a lot of his impressions of her feelings off himself at her age.

Chapter 3

Numair woke uncharacteristically before dawn, dressing quickly as he exited his rooms. Cloaking himself in an invisibility spell, the mage crept down the corridors heading towards the stables. Standing outside of Daine's door, he conjured a flower that represented everything the young woman was to him. Carefully, he pinned it to her door before leaving as stealthily as he'd arrived. Returning to his rooms, the mage crawled back into bed with a smile on his face as he fell back to sleep.

This was the start of his new sleep pattern as he woke early every morning to leave a fresh bloom on the Wildmage's door. On the second day Daine asked him about it when she came to his rooms in the afternoon. He'd been delighted when she'd started wearing the flowers in her hair.

"I assume you're the one leaving me these?" she pointed to the flower she wore.

He grinned and stroked a stray curl off her face affectionately. "I am."

"It's very pretty. What is it?"

"It's called an orchid. They're found in the southern regions of Yamut and Shusin. They're quite rare and very beautiful." Just like his Wildmage.

She went on her tiptoes and kissed him lightly. "Thank you. It's causing quite a stir though."

It was true, after a few days of leaving orchids at her door, Daine's secret admirer was the talk of all the gossips. Numair found this highly amusing as no one even suspected it could be him when most of the gossips believed he'd already been bedding his friend for years. No man would court a young woman so ardently if he'd already slept with her.

Harailt found the mage midweek to speak to him about teaching the pages and if he'd be willing to teach them about the Immortals as he was one of the most knowledgeable people on the subject. Numair agreed eagerly but realised he had a lot of work ahead of him, compiling his many notes and books he'd written over the years to update the information they already had about the Immortals. The mage conscripted Daine into helping him with his task in the afternoons. She knew as much about them as he did and welcomed her input as well as another excuse to spend time with her.

The Wildmage sat beside him writing up their notes on Stormwings when she noticed another pile of books on the corner of the desk. "What are these?" she asked.

He looked up and smiled. "Those are for a special project."

The young woman picked one up and read the spine. "The History of Courtship and Matrimonial Rituals of the Eastern Lands. What is this for?"

"Inspiration," he blushed. "I haven't courted anyone seriously before and I wasn't sure how to go about it."

"Numair, you don't need to make a fuss," she sighed replacing the book. "I don't need any of this. Just you."

He smiled tenderly, taking her hand and kissing it. "I want to. You mean more to me than I can ever put into words and it's not like I can joust for your favour in a tournament."

Daine laughed. "You'd fall off the horse before you even picked up the lance." Numair tweaked her nose. "You did turn a man into a tree for me. That should count for something."

"I didn't know I was in love with you then," the mage admitted shyly.

"How long have you loved me?"

"That's a complicated question," and a potentially damning one. He put down his quill and looked at her seriously. "I've loved you for a very long time. I realised more recently that I was in love with you."

"All right, when did you realise you were in love with me then?" she grinned.

"When the barrier fell at midwinter I knew for certain," he swallowed nervously. "But I suspected it when we were in Carthak."

"I thought you only had eyes for Varice." There was a hint of jealousy in her voice when she spoke his ex-lover's name.

"I won't lie to you; she certainly distracted my attention." The mage looked away feeling ashamed for a number of reasons. "But I realised I didn't love her anymore – and I was becoming increasingly confused by my feelings for you."

"Really?" she looked at him incredulously.

Numair sighed. "You cannot have been completely unaware of the reaction you were causing dressed as you were?"

Daine blushed. "I know I turned a few heads, but I don't hold a candle to Varice."

Her idea of 'a few heads' was drastically different to what he remembered seeing in Carthak, and last midwinter for that matter. "Darling, my attention was divided equally between the two of you," the mage admitted. "I was not immune to your grace and beauty either."

Daine laughed. "You just liked how I looked in the pretty clothes the queen gave me. That's not love!"

Numair tweaked her nose fondly. "Those clothes made me realise you were no longer a girl but had grown into a beautiful young woman. Gods, I was entranced by you! You were just the sort of woman I would have pursued at court and that scared me."

"You go after blondes," she teased. "One's with a lot more curves and chest than what I've got."

"Not always," he muttered. "When I first arrived at court, I didn't have a preference – other than a pretty face, of course." The mage closed his eyes knowing this was going to be a difficult conversation. "I didn't intentionally go after blondes. It was only after you and Onua kept teasing me about having a type that I started to notice a pattern." Numair sighed heavily and looked at Daine. "I think I'd started to miss what I had with Varice, and I was trying to inadvertently replace her. Believe me, I've thought about it a lot over the past year. I fear I've been subconsciously pursuing women that reminded me of her, but I swear to you that I do not have a preference when it comes to a woman's appearance."

"Are you sure you're over Varice?" the young woman frowned suspiciously.

Numair took her hands and looked deep into her eyes. "Daine, I have not thought about her since Carthak. I promise you, there is nothing between us and there never will be again. I don't love her."

"You canoodled with her in Carthak though, didn't you?" she accused.

"We had sex, yes. On two separate occasions." Daine removed her hands from his looking distinctly annoyed. Numair had decided to be completely honest and open with her about his past but that didn't mean he was going to enjoy discussing it with her. "I can't change what happened between us, but I do regret it."

"She was your lover before you left Carthak."

"Yes," he sighed.

"So, what changed? Why did you stop loving her?" the young woman asked, folding her arms.

"Time and distance didn't help," Numair sat back in his chair fully committing himself to answering her questions. "We'd become very different people. I don't think you realise just how different I was back then. I think she was also a little jealous of the attention I was paying you," he remembered the look Varice had given him when he'd chosen to spend time with Daine in the menagerie. "She used to know me better than anyone, but while we were there, she wanted me to be her Arram again, and wouldn't accept the man I'd become." The mage pinched his nose needing to tell her all of it. "Ozorne ordered Varice to seduce me. I'm ashamed to admit I didn't make it difficult for her."

Daine's eyes searched his face. "Why would Ozorne want her to do that?"

Numair took a deep breath forcing himself to speak the words. "To see how much influence she had over me."

"And did she? – influence you, I mean," she asked.

"No. By then I think both Varice and Ozorne had realised I loved you – even before I did," the mage ran a shaky hand through his hair. "If I had let them believe I still loved Varice maybe he wouldn't have kidnapped you."

"Ozorne said when he drugged me that you were in love with me," the young woman frowned in thought. "I didn't really believe him at the time. But he knew you'd come for me."

"Ozorne was my best friend, and in some ways, he knew me better than Varice did." That was a very uncomfortable truth. Even after everything he'd been through with the once Emperor Mage, Ozorne had always been able to see right through him.

Daine capped the lid back on her inkwell and stood up holding out a hand to him. "I don't think I want to talk about this anymore, and I'm pretty sure you don't want to, either."

"Not really," he admitted taking her hand.

"So, let's go to dinner and forget about it," she smiled. "Kit, c'mon. We're going to get something to eat."

Numair joined her for dinner, but he found he couldn't forget their conversation. The mage picked through his meal feeding a good majority of it to Kitten who transferred herself to his lap when she discovered what he was doing. He didn't want to keep any secrets from Daine, but he was revealing a side of himself she'd never seen before. What if she was ashamed of him?

Numair was relieved when the Wildmage suggested they go for a walk after their meal. They left Kitten in the banquet hall begging for scraps from the others. It wasn't unusual for the pair to be seen together so no one thought anything of it. It was surprisingly easy to hide a relationship when everyone was used to them being inseparable. As soon as they were far enough away from the palace Daine took Numair's hand in hers.

"What's bothering you?" she looked up at him. Her blue-grey eyes searching his. "I noticed you weren't eating at dinner."

"I'm scared that I've disappointed you."

The young woman sighed "I'm not going to lie and say I'm exactly happy that you've had past lovers. It was a bit of a shock when I first found out. I didn't think you were like that." Numair swallowed nervously. "But Ma used to take men to her bed, and I never resented her for it. She said she got lonely sometimes."

It never ceased to amaze him how mature Daine's perspective of the world could be despite her youth. There were ladies of the court who had thrown tantrums for less because he hadn't 'saved himself for them'.

"There haven't been as many women since you came into my life," he said softly. "It's possibly why you didn't know about my promiscuity straight away."

"Did you love any of them?" she asked.

"Not a single one. It was all just physical attraction and – a way to counteract the loneliness, as your mother said." Something he hadn't felt as much since Daine had become a part of his life. The connection they'd shared, even in the early days, had filled the emptiness inside of him until it was only a physical need that had to be satisfied occasionally.

"I think I understand why you wanted to take things slow," the Wildmage said. "I thought I knew everything about you but it's like I'm getting to know you again."

Numair gripped her hand a little tighter terrified she may not like what she saw in him now. The young woman stopped and took both his hands, placing them around her waist. He met her eyes as her hands ran up his arms to his shoulders.

"I like that you're being so honest with me," she smiled up at him. "You aren't treating me like a child, thinking I can't handle any of this."

"I certainly don't think of you as a child," he said firmly.

"And I'm not disappointed. So long as you don't go bedding any other women while you're with me then it doesn't really matter who you canoodled with in the past," Daine stated pragmatically.

Numair had no words with which to form an intelligent response to her open acceptance of the man he'd been, so he kissed her and poured all his love into that one kiss, wrapping his arms around her so tightly until they were both trembling.

"I love you," he whispered when he could finally breath again.

She grinned up at him clinging to his shoulders "I love you too."

Numair's heart swelled as a lump formed in his throat. He hadn't believed her the first time she had said the words and a part of him was afraid to believe her now, but she looked so sincere.

"I'm not going to ask when you started loving me because I fear it's when I kissed you," he smiled guiltily.

Daine giggled. "I loved you for longer than that. The kiss just made me realise, that's all."

Numair shook his head in wonder. "That is going to take a very long time for me to get used to."

"What?" she tilted her head.

"Hearing you say that you love me," the mage caressed her cheek tenderly.

"Well, I do, so get used to it," the young woman said raising her chin stubbornly.

"Do you know when it started – loving me?" he asked shyly.

"Not really. I think I always did in some way," she frowned in thought. "You gave me magic, learning and you loved me. I think I've always known that somehow. I've never trusted anyone like I trust you."

"Nor I, sweetling."

They kissed again, lips brushing tenderly as their hands touched and caressed each other. Numair could feel himself falling again and was very glad they were outside and a long way from his rooms. It was quite some time before either of them was ready to release the other, but eventually the mage managed to escort his friend back to her room and bid her goodnight.

The week passed quickly and soon the day of the Feast of the Fallen was upon them. Everyone was dressed very simply in black as they sat around the long tables. Servants brought food while the pages waited on the tables bringing wine. The war had left its mark on many of those in attendance. Several people bore scars and many of them had gained or acquired more white or grey hairs. Several of Numair's friends were surprised that he hadn't tried to dye his white hairs to preserve his dignity. Only Alanna knew how he had acquired them, and the mage had kept the hairs stubbornly as a reminder to himself how close he'd come to losing Daine. The mages had finally reunited with the red-headed knight who had returned from the north at the king's command. Alanna had been overjoyed to see them both alive and well and there had been several tearful embraces.

The Lioness sat with her husband, George Cooper, at Their Majesties table along with Raoul of Goldenlake and Malorie's Peak, Duke Baird and Sir Myles of Olau. Daine and Numair sat together on a separate table opposite Buri and Onua while Musenda sat on the other side of the mage. Kitten had her own place set next to the Wildmage with Tkaa on the other side. Numair had specially collected stones for the basilisk for the feast. The first course was a thick and hearty vegetable soup, but the second course was stuffed goose and wild boar. Daine and Numair both paled at the sight until the mage spotted a platter of trout. He served the fish on both of their plates while Daine dished out the vegetables. Buri and Onua watched the pair trying to smother their laughter.

"You two have been living in each other's boots for far too long," Onua shook her head in amusement.

"Should we check they aren't already wearing the other's boots?" Musenda commented with his deep rumbling laugh.

Numair refused to rise to their teasing as he poured himself some wine before passing the jug to Buri. Daine still hadn't acquired a taste for wine, so he knew not to offer the jug to her.

"Come to think of it," Buri said slyly as she poured her own goblet of wine. "Daine, weren't you wearing Numair's clothes when you arrived here on the back of a dragon?"

The mage chocked on a mouthful of vegetables and blushed furiously as the two K'miri women sniggered at his expression.

"I lost my pack when I fell off a cliff in the Divine Realms," Daine explained practically. "I had to wear Numair's spares."

"Surely one of his shirts would be like a dress on you, my dove." Musenda grinned and winked at the mage earning a scowl in return.

"He cut them down for me," the young woman defended hotly.

"Why didn't you just use your magic to resize them?" Onua asked the mage.

"I didn't have any at the time. I was drained," Numair responded quietly.

"You didn't mention any trouble when you were recounting your story before," Buri eyed the pair suspiciously. "You made it sound like a walk through the countryside." The mages exchanged a look. "What other secrets are you two hiding?"

Numair prayed he wasn't as crimson as he felt. He doubted the K'miri's words were meant the way they sounded, and he truly hoped she hadn't noticed anything between them.

"We had some – trouble along the way," Daine said pushing the fish around her plate.

"Mages! You never get a straight answer," the K'miri commander complained.

Their talk moved onto easier topics as Buri and Musenda discussed Rider movements and allocation while Onua and Daine talked about the horses. Numair listened to the conversations around the tables and ate quietly wanting some time to his own thoughts. While it was nice to be among friends again it was difficult to adjust to. He'd spent too many months travelling with Daine, Kitten and Tkaa and his social skills had slipped during that time.

Once the meal was cleared away, King Jonathan rose to his feet at the head table and cleared his throat as a herald called for quiet.

"Today we gather to honour those who fought for Tortall and lost their lives. Their sacrifice will never be forgotten by the families and friends who will never see them return. Throughout our history brave men and women have been called to defend the kingdom, but until this day we had never faced a threat of this magnitude. To be besieged by creatures of legend, Immortals, who had united with forces from Scanra, Carthak and the Copper Isles, it took individuals of great courage and fortitude to stand against such foes. As I call their names, I ask you to remember what each of these fallen heroes stood for and sacrificed so that we may live and so that our families may continue."

A servant passed the king a thick scroll as he proceeded to read aloud the names on the list. Numair recognised very few of those names but listened in respectful silence like everyone else. The king had to pause several times for a mouthful of drink before he reached the end of the scroll. Numbers never had the same impact to illustrate the loss during wartime as a name. It was something Ozorne had never appreciated when calculating the acceptable losses from a battle. It was just another reminder that Numair had chosen the correct man to pledge his loyalty and service to.

"Rikash Moonsword," Daine whispered at his side when the king finished.

The mage looked at the young woman sharply as she met his eyes tearfully. Carefully, he slid his hand under the table and took hers squeezing it. They had both considered the Stormwing a friend and ally, as unlikely as that was. Numair would have to ask Daine how the Immortal died later, but for now, he felt his own grief for Rikash who had aided them in Carthak and the Divine Realms.

"We honour you and your sacrifice," King Jonathan intoned raising his goblet. "On behalf of us all, we salute you and pledge to never forget what you did for our great kingdom."

Everyone raised their goblets in a toast and drank solemnly. With the banquet over, people either sat sharing their grief or their memories with friends or chose to slip away quietly in contemplation. Kitten remained inside with Tkaa while Numair followed Onua and Daine back to the stables where the pair groomed the horses in silence. No one felt like talking, but they all appreciated each other's company.