Sex diet

Indie London band.

Nevada grand tour….

She glossed over most of the dates until she hit the Jasper dates. Huh weird, they had about three days here. Performing in The New Jasper bar and disco. Jack groaned as he waited for the Autobots to come around the corner.

"Forty five bucks!" She shouted. She stared at the fine print. Jack turned and looked for himself. He leaned in, squinting as he read it.

"Comes with a meet and greet though," He pointed out while tapping the ending sentence, "Probably because they only have six fans." He snorted. He gasped as he got an elbow in the rib. Miko smirked and grabbed the flyer, making a hole from where she tore it out of the pin. She turned back to the street and marched to the sidewalk. Jack groaned as he followed her, he tapped his foot against the concrete.

"So, who are they exactly?" He leaned over to read the flyer. Miko smiled as she turned to him. She held up the flyer.

"They're an English band, so like… They have cool accents. But like, dude. Their punk, and rock and metal. They don't write much of their own stuff, they're like a cover band. But they're super cool and that." She shoved the flyer into her bag. Jack slowly nodded, making a vague noise of recognition and understanding. The roar of an engine caught the two's attention, Bulkhead turned the corner and was quick to come up to them. The passenger and back door flew open before them. Miko was faster than Jack and so got the front seat. He rolled his eyes and climbed into the back. The doors shut, it was a strange experience. A car with no driver. The car that drove itself, and they sat inside of him. It took a while to normalise it in your mind, but the three managed it.

"How was school, kids!?" Bulkhead shouted as they began the drive to the base. Jack shrugged as he plugged in his seat belt. Miko didn't bother, after all! She was safe in here, sixty tons of war metal that could transform and think? Who needed one!?

Jack was the first to answer, "Nothing much. Got some maths tests, some more history homework and all the fun stuff as usual." Miko snorted as she looked back at him.

"You're seriously not gonna do those mock tests? Dude, they don't matter that much!" She reasoned, waving away any protests or concerns. They turned a corner and headed outside of the town. The Nevada desert was rock and dust, not much to look at. Miko leaned back as her mind wondered. She wondered about the concert, how epic it'd be.

"And what did you do kid?" Bulkhead snapped her out of her daydream. Miko smiled as she clicked her fingers together.

"A band I'm into is coming into town! So, I've got plans for Sunday!" She gestured around wildly as she spoke. Bulkhead chuckled as he went off the road towards the silo.

"What? Slash Monkey? Death Squad?"

"Sex Diet!"

"... What?" Bulkhead blurted it out. That was a band name he had never heard before. He wondered why she had never told him about them before… Miko laughed as the silo doors opened. The bright lights of the Autobot base were harsh in a way, a contrast to the softer natural light it tried to act like. They were quick to drive through and they could hear the others.

"Sex Diet, its the name of the band. On their blog they said they drew some names on a dice and chose what they rolled." She laughed as she retold the story. Bulkhead came to a halt and let the two out. Jack was quick to head up the stairs to Raf, but Miko followed Bulkhead as she pulled out the flyer.

"Check'em out dude! I have some of their CDs if you want to listen to them?" She rummaged through her bag. Bulkhead gently took the flyer and groaned as he read. He scratched the top of his helm. Arcee uncrossed her arms and pushed herself off the wall she had been leaning on, she read the flyer as well. The flyer was black with streaks of pink and blue and green coursing through. Optimus turned from the console, Ratchet was too busy to care.

"I would like to listen to your music Miko." Optimus knelt and outstretched his digits to her. She hopped onto the black palm and was lifted up. Miko took out her CD case as Optimus placed her beside a part of the console.

"It is that slot there." He pointed to a small slit in the device. Miko smiled as she flicked the case open. The front of it read 'Sex Diet - Crushed rat skull'. She fiddled with the controls as she worked it. Ratchet groaned as Optimus looked at him.

"We let Rafael show us his coding, we let Jack show us his video games. We can let Miko show us her music." Optimus smiled at his old friend. Arcee snorted as she walked to the three, she looked at the two taller mechs.

"The flyer is an interesting design." He snickered. Optimus glanced back at Bulkhead who was still trying to make heads-or-tails of it.

Suddenly a guitar riff broke the silence. Miko whooped as she adjusted the volume. Then the drums kicked in.

All my friends are having sex

Living breathing, so alive.

But you're the only one on my mind.

Walk to the hallway, share a cigarette

Kill the cells, smothering my lungs.

And ask how you waste your time.

You take me away, take me out back.

And show me your favourite pastime.

The singer was male, a brummie English accent. He sounded young and added a delightful whine at the end of some of the lines. Miko smiled as she looked back at the 'Bots. There was a mix of reactions on their faceplates. Optimus was smiling but was more or less neutral. Bulkhead had scrunched up his jaw as he listened. He looked decisive, like he wasn't particularly sure of it. Ratchet just continued to work, groaning as he tried to work through it. He just shook his head and grumbled to himself. Arcee had her head tilted back as her arms were crossed. She was, however, tapping her pede every so slightly.

And like a ghost you steal my breath away.

Like a drug you take my breath away.

You spend your time counting the dead

You could go quietly without a sound

Please just take me with you.

The lyrics were interrupted by a loud instrumental. Something about the guitars sounded slightly off. Actually everything about it sounded a little off, like the quality was not the best it could be. Like it was recorded in a garage or even a warehouse. A few voices broke through the instrumental.

Whhhooooooahoo!

Lust, hate, and death

Are the chemicals

That I get high off

When I breathe you in.

The instrumental went harder as an electric guitar broke through the chaos. She laughed as some of them winced. Yet Optimus leaned in and listened to the lyrics.

Cigarettes and sex

Two things I can use

Sex with love and sex without

Sex with love and sex wihout

A varied diet keeps you fat.

Smoke me!

Fuck me!

Ciggerates and Sex!

The engravings on my tombstone.

"Miko?" Optimus called. She turned back and smiled at him. He knelt down to be more eye level with her, "Why are you attracted to lyrics of such a vulgar nature?" She paused at the question. It was one she had never really been asked. She frowned as she looked at the ground, her mind wondering. The lyrics faded, so did the music. She thought about the first time she had discovered the band. She had discovered them on some indie band forums, one of the lead singers, the one that was singing, was advertising. He had a few links to their website and that's how she found them.

"I… I dunno. I like the word play and I like the fact that they sing about how they… They actually feel about this stuff. Not like the frilly songs talking about flowers and giggling when talking about love." She tried to find the words, even in her native tongue she'd find it hard enough. She scooped what words she could with her mind, she realised that her words were strained and stuttered. Optimus nodded as he thought about what she said. Miko paused as she heard the ending of the song play. She popped out the Cd and placed it back in the case. She looked at the others, Bulkhead frowned.

"They sing a lot about sex… I'm not too sure, Miko." He frowned as he looked at Optimus, the Prime sighed as he placed his hand on his hip. He sighed as he looked at Arcee who just shrugged at it.

"I liked it anyway." She admitted, she walked over to where the other two were. Optimus looked back at Bulkhead.

"I am not one to judge Miko's music tastes. But, I have no issue with what I've heard." He reasoned. Bulkhead muttered as he looked at Miko. She just shrugged as she stuffed the CD in her bag, she jumped over the keyboard, over Ratchet's hand. It made him grunt in surprise as he took a step back. Miko smiled as she climbed from the desk to the platform that the humans walked on. She ran over to the other two who were busy racing away on the video game. Optimus looked at Bulkhead, he patted the mech's shoulder.

"We must have trust in Miko, as our Guardians we must protect them. But as observers we must not interfere." He reassured Bulkhead. The other nodded as his shoulders sagged. He watched his charge for a moment and finally nodded.

"Yeah, okay. Gotcha."

"And if by some chance, this band has connections to the Decepticons, you may then interfere." Optimus cracked a soft smile. Bulkhead snorted and chortled as he walked over to Arcee. Optimus smiled as he crossed his arms and watched the small family that had accumulated since the humans came to the base. While he agreed with himself that Miko was old enough to be on her own and decide what's best. He shared Bulkhead's anxiety about the explicit lyrics, as well as the band's vague origin. The C.D case cover was obviously homemade and the sound quality showed that it was not performed in a studio. He looked at the clock, it was almost five. The kids usually headed home for dinner by six or seven. Bumblebee was out on an energon hunt, and everyone was content and doing something. He walked down the hall, to the back of the base.

The motor of the bus shuddered as he walked down the catwalk. He yelped as he gripped onto the edge of one of the cabins. The tour bus had beds, almost like coffins, lining the side. Every other stop Thorian would work on tearing out the unneeded ones. Giving them more space for instruments and living space. Right now Thorian was doing a skype call with his brothers. They were off living honest, grounded lives. His twin Danny especially. Though Danny's husband wasn't on the call, he was probably downstairs in the music shop working.

"John!?" A voice behind called, he turned, a little too fast and almost fell. On her bed, their writer and his co-singer sat. Her hair was shaved into a mullet, it was pink and a shade of brown in a weird mix. She had her nails painted black and professionally permed. She had dark make-up on, with triangles strutting out the bottom of her eyelashes. She had a sports bra on that was baby pink of a shade, her ripped jeans were hanging off of her loosely. She gestured back to Thorian.

"Tell him to get off of Skype, if the police somehow track us through it, we'll be done for." She snapped. John blinked, he looked at the bus and remembered they technically didn't own this. They also technically didn't have visas, but here they were. Touring and using the profits to fucking run from city to city. Ar-Lu was painting their shirts after buying a bunch of black shirts from some bulk buying shop. Edwin was driving and John was just busy being his sexy self. John frowned as he looked at Thorian.

"You heard the boss woman, dude, say bye to your brothers." John called. Thorian grunted, there were mutters from the screen and then it went black. Thorian stood. He was of darker skin, darkest in the group. His dark chocolate matched his darker brown eyes. His lighter brown hair was shaved on one side and the other had dreadlocks draping down from it,

He had a single scar on his right cheek, going down his chin. He had a lip piercing that he rolled around with his tongue when he was thinking. So it spun around a lot. He held onto the edge of his bed, he had the bunk above Briars, who smiled up at him.

"Why the fuck did I have to shut the call off?" He poked her on the forehead. She swung her legs over and sat up. Looking at the two. She scratched at her stubble and picked at a spot on the bottom of her chin.

"We're not supposed to be in the country, remember?" She recalled, her Manchester accent clashed with his general American accent. She chuckled as she stood, just being a few inches below Thorian's height and above John's height. Thorian rolled his eyes.

"I'm not at threat of deportation here. You lot are, well, Edwin will probably be allowed to stay as well." The dual-citizen gave a thumbs up from the driver's seat. John snorted as he climbed onto his bed. The plane bed sheets were a little nerdy. But he liked planes, he would have loved to become a pilot for the RAF… If he had gone to school maybe he would have. John kicked his trainers off and fell against the pillows.

"If you get caught here buddy, you'll be in for life. And then who'll take care of Clovis?" Briar pointed out. Thorian went quiet. John perked up as he inched his head closer to look at the two. He bit his lip not to yelp as Thorian punched the board above Brair's head. It cracked, the wood splintering into spiderweb cracks. The two stared at each other, what little colour Brair had left in her face disappeared. Thorian snarled as he stared down at her, the threat of violence suddenly became real to them.

"Keep your mouth shut, or I'll make you shut it." He growled. Brair moved away, pressing her back against the window. Thorian turned away and left. Brair took some deep breaths as John's head appeared. Upside down, his curly and fluffy hair fell to almost block the entrance. He looked at her, his olive green eyes looked around. He could see the fear in her eyes as he dropped down, twisting his body and landing on his feet. He sat beside her as he tapped his fingers against the side of the mattress.

"You shouldn't have mentioned Clovis."

"He shouldn't be so eager to see us deported."

"Yeah, he's an asshole. But he's one of my best mates and a great bassist." John rubbed her back. She snorted as she looked at him.

"Jasper is the next stop, yeah?" She guessed. John paused and grabbed one of the flyers. He scanned through the scratched out dates. It was marked with the amount of people at every concert.

23… 34… 22… 11…. 0… 54…. Ah! Jasper! John pointed to it with a nod… It was at this sketchy bar that let under 21s in, so that'd be a fun crowd for them. Brair leaned over and looked at the dates. She nodded as she leaned back, crossing her arms.

"I've heard that there's been weird sightings there." She snorted. Knowing exactly where this would go. She watched the cogs in his head turn, his eyes widened as his mouth slowly opened. The corners of his mouth curled into a smile as his head raised.

"Aliens?" He turned to her. He then winced as he rubbed at the back of his neck. She snorted as she nodded.

"Yep! Cars with no drivers apparently, riders suddenly appearing on motorbikes and all that." His eyes were bright like starlight as his mind went to work. Imagining all the possibilities from her vague description. He giggled as he bounced up and down. Thinking of the possibilities.

"So cool! So cool! Ah! Fucking alien cars! Or maybe they're a secret Government project! Oh- Oh! What if they escaped Area 51!" John rubbed his hands together. Brair smirked, hook, line and sinker. He was a big believer in aliens, it's why he was so mad to get to America. Because apparently America was an alien sight central, where all the blobby head and long fingered E.T fucks were partying. America was a pain in the ass in her opinion, it was so politically correct and wishy washy. She had asked John for a fag and had some hundred year old woman scream at her for using a slur. It was funny when she blew cigarette smoke into the coffin dodgers face though. Actually, she was dying for a cigarette now that she thought about it.

"When are we pulling over?" She shouted down to Edwin, the other looked back for a second. He frowned as he looked at the Satnav and then smiled.

"We can pull over to camp in five minutes!" He called back. She nodded as she got off her bed. She held onto the sides of the bunks as she walked to the back. Ar-Lu smiled as he looked up at her. Ar-Lu wasn't his real name, actually most of them didn't use their real name. Ar-Lu's name was just the most out there. She sat down across from him, he put down the spray paint and pulled down his mask. He smiled, his lips were covered in piercings. She liked to imagine if he added any more, his voice would be deafened by the jingling of the rings and piercings. He slipped off his gloves, and wiped sweat on his brow.

"How many shirts will we need for the concert?" He looked at the shirts he had spray painted and done with markers. The pink zig zagged with 'Sex diet' wrote down in tipex. He probably needed to add some more. There was also a massive sign that said 'Do not wash. Liable to take text and design off of shirts'.

They didn't sell too many shirts.

"I dunno, sixty?" She shrugged. She was just there to grab the cigarette packaging and the lighter. She rummaged through John's skateboarding bag and stole his.

"Ah, okay. I've done 'hundred." He admitted. She stared up at him, he was from… Where was he from? She scanned his bed for an indication, no football clubs… No town flags… Well there goes that insult.

"We'll have left overs at least." She conceded not having the last word. She tutted to herself, she hated doing that. Call it pride or insecurity. Not having that final word, not having that last bite, it infuriated her. She had no idea where it came from, but it was a flame in her that she loved to stoke. She smiled as she looked at the windows, watching the desert. She sighed as she tilted her head back and just closed her eyes.

"This Jasper place better be worth it…"

Miko frowned as she stood in her room. She sighed as she slipped her on, the loose shirt hung over her body. Today was productive… Ish. She had at least gotten to show the 'Bots Sex diet. Though some of the reactions were less than wanted. Though Optimus's question had struck an accord with her. She scratched at her arm and looked around. The room was… Fake, she felt. There was something off in it, she wasn't sure what it was. Was it the baby pink that the host family had chosen? The cross that she had stuffed into the depth of the closet, it was there when she had arrived. She hated having it above her bed, so she had thrown it into the closet. She shuddered as she sat on the bed, the springs squeaking.

Why was she so attracted to that band? She wanted to answer… Truthfully, but it was the best she didn't. She never knew where the Autobots were towards the whole… Well, the gay thing. She had a good idea of what the Decepticon's opinions were on it, boy did Knockout make it obvious. She frowned as she looked at hands. It was hard to put it into words, how she felt. The band was quite forward with themselves. One of the Guitarists was bisexual, the drummer was a homosexual man and well. She thinks the other guitarist was a cross dresser of some kind.

She looked at her draws, she rolled onto her chest, dangling her front half off of the bed. She opened the bottom draw, it was full of different stuff. Hair Bands, combs, hairbrushes, pencils, rubbers, pens… There! She grabbed the piece of paper, a pamphlet. She rolled over onto her back, she had first gone to an American doctor after a month. There was a bunch of sexual health pamphlets, things were a lot more talked about here. She rolled onto her back as she looked at the pamphlet.

'So you think your gay?' Then there was a woman holding a rainbow flag with the sun making a glare behind her. Americans were fond of that kind of photo style. She opened the pamphlets, it was covered in red ink. Signs and 'symptoms', as the pamphlet called them, circled and highlighted. She sighed as she even did the quiz… She remembered her life back in Japan, the girls would go off with boys and her mind would be stuck on the volleyball captain of the girls team. She'd hang out with her at any chance. Miko groaned and grabbed a pillow.

She screamed into it, hoping no one heard. She kicked the air as she did so. She slowly pulled the pillow away and groaned. She was gay… Well, lesbian she thinks the word is. She sighed as she rubbed at her head. She needed to talk to someone, tell anyone. She didn't want to do this alone. She searched her mind for any of the Autobots, Optimus was the best choice.

She needed someone to know, to keep the secret and not know what to do was so much. The prime should be the best to tell. Maybe tomorrow, she had already explained how she had learned about the band before she left. Obscure forums on the internet. He was open and happy to learn more.

Hopefully he'd be the same with her.

He sighed as he typed on his console. Human forums were always a mystery to him, so scattered and cluttered. An Archivist's worst nightmare. Optimus typed and scanned the poorly designed website before him. He paused as he found the username.

'Jetrabbit382', it was a frequent account on the forum, appearing every now again on even the oddest subject. He remembered what Miko said and clicked onto the username, the personal page of the person appeared.

John Lepus.

19

Lead guitarist and founder of Sex diet.

He sighed. While he realised this went against everything he stood for, keeping distance from humans, not being 'nosy' as the humans said. There was something… Off, wrong about this one human. He seemed happy to personally, privately message a sixteen year old Japanese girl… He found it strange. Especially when Miko was reading out some of the messages. He mentioned a lack of parental activity. Even some of his language suggested things like he didn't eat often, he frowned as he thought to himself. If a human youngling was in peril, and this close to Jasper and the Autobots. He could not feel guilty for turning his back in the name of 'disguise'. That was not the way of the Primes. He also reasoned it to himself by the fact he lacked a human charge, so did Ratchet, so did Wheeljack.. So there was room for one more. He perked up when he noticed any account could message the account.

He looked at the door, he felt like a young Spark, watching out for his sire when looking up something he shouldn't be. He reminded himself that he was not a young spark, his sire was dead, he had locked his door and also he was a Prime and the commander of the base. So no one was going to disturb him.

He frowned and opened up the chat. A blank screen greeted him, waiting for him to message.

Hello?

He sat back, regret started to surface. He also wondered, how long would it ta- A green check mark appeared beside the text.

U good mate?

His optics narrowed in surprise, he guessed the youth was not too far from his device.

I am fine. I was in contact with a friend of mine, her name on this website is 'Bashpunl420'. She is a fan of your amateur band and is going to your concert at Jasper, Nevada. How are you?

He frowned, a tinge of cringe made him wince. He wondered if he was doing this right. Human culture was so strange. He had an idea he wasn't because of the difference in responses. The human didn't even use some of the words, replacing 'you' with the letter 'u'. Why did he do this? Optimus considered, was it convenient? Surely it was.

Good I guess? I know the chick your on about, Miko? Yeah, we talk? Why you her old man?

Old man… Oh! Father. The human name for a male parental unit. Optimus leaned back, his frown deepened. He was already in deep, he reconsigned this. He drummed his digits against his desk. The room he sat in was only lit by the screen. He sighed and closed his optics. Before typing,

I am. I do not mean any harm. I am not going to report you to the authorities. I just wanted to talk to you myself.

Oh, right… Watca want to chat about?

Optimus tapped his digit against the console and finally responded.

Why did you start your band?

Oh!

Er… I always liked music and ya know. I'm from England and we're the home of The Clash, Bowie and Queen. So like why not?

Why did you call it 'Sex diet'?

Why did u call yourself OptimusPrime1?

He blinked. He realised that without context how odd the name would be. He looked at the username and sighed.

No reason. You reference drugs and sex in your music a lot, why?

There was a pause in responses. Like he was considering what he was going to stay. Optimus wondered what was happening on the other side, what environment was he in right now? Who was surrounding him?

Eh, your the product of your surundings or however the fuck the saying goes. Write what ya know.

I'm sorry, that does not sound like a pleasant life.

There was a pause in responses. Optimus did not lie. He could only imagine what environment led to an obsession or interest in sex and drugs. The boy's misspellings also suggested a lack of education to the Prime.

Yeah, whatever.

Hey, do you guys live in Jasper?

He perked up at the question. It was strange to him.

We do, why?

Nah, we just don't have any real steady accommodation.

Optimus paused. He had not realised the idea that the band was hopping from hotel to hotel to B&B to B&B. He sighed. He had a feeling he would come to regret was the right of all sentient beings. Yet how could anyone experience freedom while having to worry about when the next meal would be or where they'd sleep for the night. He closed his optics and considered his next move. He had to be careful about this. He finally nodded to himself and started to type.

I can see what I can do for you in the coming days. Goodnight.

Night old man.

He crossed his arms and looked at the screen for a moment. He should be regretting what he did. This could be risky, pulling another human possibly into the war. He sighed. But the young man was about the same age as Jack. He couldn't imagine Jack in the harsh situation the boy seemed to come from. He turned off the console in the quiet and dark.