It had been two weeks since Sam had gotten his tongue stuck to Bumblebee, and two weeks since he had a moment of peace. Miles had decided to post the picture of Sam with his tongue stuck to his car on facebook, and he had of course tagged Sam in it. Sam had made the mistake of adding Captain William Lennox and Sergeant Robert Epps as friends and the picture had popped up on their feed. The pair had gleefully latched onto the image like a dog with a bone.
To make it even worse, the Autobots were acting the exact same way. Sam couldn't climb inside Bumblebee without being asked if he was going to get licked again, and Ratchet continuously sent him a list of common items he shouldn't lick. He was so done with it, and he knew that if he didn't get their attention off of him that he would end up yelling at someone. Or just licking everyone, and that would only end in tears.
So maybe that was why he did what he did. Or maybe he was just slightly sadistic towards Miles. It could even have been that Sam just held really long grudges against everyone who had wronged him in some way, and this way he could get two people back at once.
"I dare you to lick that police car," Sam said.
Miles looked at the police car in question with a slight frown. He hadn't bothered to ask why Sam suddenly had a police car and a black truck in his driveway, even though Miles knew neither of those vehicles belonged to Sam or his parents. Miles never questioned things like that, because he figured that if it was important that he would be told. It was one of the things that Sam had always loved about him.
"It's too warm for it to happen to me," Miles pointed out.
Which was true. The snow had melted and the temperature had risen, sitting around fifty or so degrees. Sam hadn't even bothered to put his jacket on because the two of them had only stepped outside so that Mojo could do his business. And so they could take a break from the essays they hadn't actually been working on.
"Chicken?" Sam batted his eyes at him.
Miles was unphased, "Unlike you, I'm completely willing to start bawking. And that thing looks ten kinds of nasty, dude. Seriously musty and shit."
Sam bit the inside of his lip to try and keep from laughing. About a week ago, Barricade had contacted Bumblebee to start negotiations to join the Autobots. It was a move that took all of them by surprise, but the best choice Barricade had available to him. With Megatron dead and a long standing feud with Starscream that stopped him from joining his other Decepticons, he really had no other choice if he wanted to live in peace and have something besides gasoline to put in his tanks.
This was the second day that Barricade had shown up. Bumblebee had requested Ironhide's presence because he was the weapons specialist for the entire Autobot army and he would be able to tell what kind of weapons Barricade could have and assess his overall threat level. Sam had been a little reluctant to have Barricade show up at his house, but Bumblebee had reassured him that Ironhide and he could stop Barricade before he managed anything if he did try to betray them.
When Barricade had appeared, Sam had been shocked by his appearance. He looked a lot worse than when he had last seen him in Mission City and he was covered in dirt and who knew what else. Miles was completely right in saying he looked nasty, and Sam was grateful that Bumblebee had made it clear that Miles was in the dark so hopefully Barricade wouldn't get too offended by his little remark. The three mechs were talking over a private comm channel, so he was sure that Bumblebee would play snippets for him later if anything funny happened.
"I could always tell my mom it was you who broke that lamp last week," Sam mused.
That made Miles' eyes widen, "You wouldn't!"
"I would."
"That's not cool, man."
"I could tell her about the coffee table inci–"
Sam wasn't even able to finish his next threat before Miles was taking large strides over to Barricade. He had to jog just to get ahead of him, and when he did he leaned right up against Bumblebee's front bumper because it would give him the best view. Miles shot him a dirty look but sidled up to the battered police cruiser, anyway. He looked it over for a long moment. Sam could practically see him debating what the best area would be to lick, but it was a hard choice considering the fine layer of film that was coating Barricade.
Miles finally made up his mind. He ducked his head down and licked a long stripe up Barricade's driver side window, leaving a streak of almost clear glass behind. As soon as he was done, Miles began to rub his tongue on the inside of his shirt with a disgusted noise.
"Ugh, are you satisfied now?" Miles whirled around to face Sam, crossing his arms over his chest.
Sam felt Bumblebee begin to tremble underneath him and could only imagine what kind of tirade Barricade was throwing over the comm link. It had to be good if it was getting Bumblebee to laugh like that, and he was pretty sure he could even see Ironhide shaking a little. On top of that, Miles was still clearly disgusted, which was a win in Sam's book. It was entirely too hard to fuck with his friend, and he had to take a win in whatever form he could get it. Getting to mess with Barricade after the whole chasing and tossing around nonsense back when they had first met was just icing on the cake.
Sam smirked, "You have no idea."
