CHAPTER 2: What's a plot?

A/N: No offence to girls who are called Katie or Amy, this is just a story to make fun of Mary Sue's with no plot. Thanks for the two reviews! So here's chapter two. Amy suddenly appears when a black rider is after Frodo and his friends, this part is movie based, but after The Fellowship breaks, I'm gonna have it book based (duh!) Read and Review.

Amy's POV

I don't know what happened, but I saw this big, flashy light, but I thought that it was the boy next door Derek, who like, tries to take pictures of me like, everytime! But now, I'm all alone and it's dark, I'm in this kinda forest thingie. I heard some screeches, and I saw these 4 little people on the ground, terrified. "Like, what's wrong with you guys?"

Frodo's POV We were laying on the ground, trying to not be seen by those Blackriders, when all of a sudden, this brainless, human girl starts talking. She wore, well, nothing really, and she had an well shaped body. Her long, curly brown hair, coverred half of her back. She was... perfect. "Get down!", Sam said and tried to protect her from those Blackriders. "Like, hello, if anyone is going to protect me, it's gonna be big-blue eyed guy over there! Get your fat ass off of me!" She meant me with 'big-blue eyed guy.. Sigh. Sam got off of her and seemed dissapointed. She crawled over to me, and she looked like she was scarred. I gazed into her big green eyes, and felt the sudden urge to make out with her. She seemed fammiliar... Oh no! It couldn't be! She had the same effect on me as Tracey had, a couple of days ago! Tracey had almost convinced me to stay in the Hobbiton, but I didn't give in! She was evil itself, and I got rid of her, because Merry 'accidently' pushed her off a cliff. "Frodo, I'm so scarred! Please, hold me.", she whisperred softly. "How did you know my name?", I asked, I mean, how could she have known? "Maybe because I can read your thoughts, which I know all of a sudden discover." Oh no. Tracey had the abbility to appear in another form, like a cat.. Is this some kind of new race or something? This is rather scarry. She's so beautiful.. I want to feel her soft lips on mine. OH GOD, PLEASE HELP ME!!

Suddenly, the Blackrider appeared out of nowhere, and we were all scarred. The girl stood up, and glared at the Blackrider. "You will like, not hurt my friends! I'm like, not scarred at all! Go away, before I crush you into jelly!" The Blackrider didn't reply. Instead, she started showing off the best fighting skills I had ever seen. The Blackrider backed away, and rode off. Wow, how perfect can anyone be? "Like, we must go to Buckleberry Ferry! Now!" "How do you know that?", Sam asked. "Like, isn't that obvious? I've been to Lord of the Rings like, three times, 'cause Elijah Wood plays in it!" I didn't knew what she was talking about, but somehow, I trusted her and the other Hobbits too.

We ran as fast as we could, and she stopped, to sacrifice herself so we wouldn't be caught by the Blackriders. "Run!", she added, and we ran as fast as our Hobbit legs could carry us. We already gave up hoping that this perfect creauture had survived. Her effect seemed to fade away from all of us, and we started talking about this girl you'd love to hate. We finally came to the stage, where we didn't even cared about her being allive or not. But then, she came running to us, and though we already drifted about 60 feet away from the crossing, she managed to jump on. How could that happen? We felt the effect coming back, and suddenly I felt overprotected, and I wanted to hold her in my arms and tell her that everything would be okay. "Tell us about your fight with the Blackriders Miss..." "Amy" she interrupted Merry. Amy... Her name sounded Angelic. "Like, they surrounded me, and I didn't know what to do. Luckily, I always have my hairspray with me, and I sprayed it in their eyes Teehee. Plus, I showed off my fighting skills." Pippin was drooling all over her. It was quiet for a moment, Merry was peddling, when we heard a raw voice. "I'm not a girl.... Not yet a woman!!" Her voice was raspy and untrained... No wait, now hearing it, it's perfect in every way imaginable. She seemed to amaze me in everythng she did... NO! MUST FIGHT IT!!

"STOP IT!!",I yelled. They all watched me, and Amy looked hurt. "Like, Frodo, if you have a problem with me, just say so, and I'll be gone in a sec!" She started sobbing and Sam was comforting her. "How dare you be so mean, partypooper!", Pippin said. The only one who agreed with me, was Merry, the perfect girl seemed to have no effect on him, maybe a little, 'cause he looked at her with compassion, though he didn't glare at me, like Sam and Pippin did. I felt guilt for treating her like this. I don't know why, because on the other hand, I hated her, but I just couldn't... She was so sweet and so nice. So perfect.

The rest of the trip remained quiet. Pippin and Sam tried to hit on Amy, but she seemed to only stare blankly ahead, and when they asked her what was wrong, she told them about this Katie girl. Great. It sounded as another fangirl.. Crap. Right now, the ring wasn't the main thing on my mind.. It was this horrible, yet loveable girl, who was trying to hit on me now...

She sat next to me, and asked me what was wrong. I almost wanted to answer "you" but I didn't want another sappy hour of sobbing and screaming. I said that I was sorry, and when we arrived at the nearest crossing, she pushed me in some bushes.

"Like, I'm sorry Frodo, but I've loved you the moment I saw you." She gazed deep into my eyes, though she had to bent far over. I didn't want to kiss her, but suddenly I needed to feel her oh so soft lips, I don't know why though. We started making out, untill Sam caught us and started fighting with me. "You want me motherfucker? Then come and get me", he said. "Stop it, Sam! Why are you being, like, so mean! My life is so misserable." With that, she ran away, with Sam following her. I felt relieved that the bitch was gone, but I had the feeling, she was coming back. Damn.

A/N: I know this wasn't that funny, next chapter will be hopefully. Give me a review, it's my addiction, my drug, whatever. Just do it :p