CHAPTER TWO: WHAT THE ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING CAN DO AND THIS IS THE PART WHERE THE EVIL GUY TAKES IT!
The Shoyru was seriously decked out in battle gear. A shiny sword was strapped on her back, she had a shield on one hand, a red Attack Fork on the other. A silver helmet was strapped on her head and there was a Lost Desert dagger strapped on her waist. There was a small sack on the other side of her waist.
Yunalesca (as we will now call her) flapped her wings impatiently. "What are you doing here?" She damanded, pointing the Attack Fork at them.
"........ looking for that?" Kaz answered, pointing to the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING! (I just had to do that)
Yunalesca shook her head. "That item has fearsome power that no normal human can possess without going insane or shit like that. I cannot let you obtain that item, even should you defeat me in battle!"
"But, if we defeat you, who will defend the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING?" Dante asked her politely.
A Glowing Wocky and a Purple Tonu stepped out from behind Yunalesca. They, strangly, were unarmed, but Kaz could sense that they were mages. shit, now we have to fight some Xena wannabe, a Red Mage and a Blue Mage. Just my luck..
Dante was hiding behind Kaz. "KAZ!" He shrieked in fear. "THE CAT THINGY IS RADIOACTIVE!"
The glowing Wocky stared up. "Yeah, I know I am. How did you know my name?"
The real Kaz frowned. "My name is Kaz, not yours!"
"But, that's your nickname, isn't it?" Dante replied.
"Yes, bu-"
"So, it's not your real name!"
"Yes, but people call me that all the time s-"
"But you're real name is Kazuya!"
"Yeah, but it's stupid, and in this fanfic, my name is Kaz!"
"But why can't we call you by your real name?"
"Because my real name is stupid!"
"But your father gave you that name!"
"EXACTLY!"
"Why do you hate your father?"
"Look, stop talking to me. NOW."
"Bu-"
"NO!"
"I-"
"SHUT UP!"
"Ok, b-"
"THANK YOU!"
After the stupidest consective conversation in the chapter, Kaz looked down and glared at the glowing Wocky.
"I dunno who you are, and who named you, but we can't have two people named Kaz in the fanfic." he declared.
Kaz (the Wocky) frowned. "Fine. We'll call you Susan."
"SUSAN?? WHAT KIND OF STUPID NAME IS THAT??"
"I dunno.. a girl's name?"
"My name is NOT Susan, OK?"
"But it's a nice name!"
Kaz sighed and said "You're ChibiKaz, OK?"
The Wocky smiled. "GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!"
"Good. Now, can we have the Rainbowish thingy?" Dante asked timidly from behind Kaz.
The Tonu shook her head. "No, it is sacred and has powers that no mortal human, or infant demon, can possess.."
"What kind of powers?" Kaz questioned. Hey, if I can destroy those jerks at Namco with it, it's all good!
"Ummmm... eternal life, awesome god-like power, ya know, the usual.." Meep (who is the Tonu) replied.
"Oh, and it can make a box of Krispy Kreme Doughnuts that will never run out." Yunalesca added.
"KRISPY KREME DOUGHNUTS??" Kaz and Dante shouted with glee.
"GIIIMMMMIIIEEEEE!!" Dante screeched and dove headfirst for the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING!
WHAM!
Dante was thrown back, and there was a another person (thing?) holding the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING!!
It was......
.....
.....
You can feel the suspense, huh?
.......
......
Did I piss you off enough?
.....
.....
OK, the person who has the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING is...
Eden.
Yes, Eden, from FF8.
"Oh crap." Yunalesca moaned.
"WAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!" Eden laughed. "NOW, I CAN CONTROL THE WORLD AND ALL THAT STERO-TYPED SHIT!"
"And get a box of Krispy Kreme Doughnuts that will never run out.." Kaz added glumly.
"REALLY?? SWEET, WAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!" Eden laughed even louder, then she looked at Kaz again. "Wait, don't I know you?"
"Last summer, at Balamb remember?"
"Oh yeah!"
**FLASHBACK**
Squall held out a gem to Kaz. "Try it, you can summon shit!" Squall said. Kaz took the gem and stared at it.
"Ummm.. what is this again? GF? what the-..AAHAHHHHHHHH!!"
Kaz grabbed his head. "I CAN'T REMEMBER MY NAME!! WHAT ARE ALL THESE VOICES IN MY HEAD?? AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
Then, Kaz ran around scareming for a bit, then fell into the water and almost drowned. This is why he knew Eden, who almost killed him. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!
**FLASHBACK OVER (yay!)**
Eden shrugged. "Well, I gotta go now, ya know, people to meet, stuff to eat, you know.."
Kaz sighed. "Fine! Don't share!.. HMPH!" And he scowled as Eden flew off with the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING!
Yunalesca gaped at Eden, then Kaz. ".... why didn't you stop her???"
Kaz thought "... good point.."
Yunalesca then proceeded to do the infamous Anime sweatdrop!
"We gotta go find it! It's our duty to protect the ULTRA RARE SUPER SHINY RAINBOW SHINY THING from evil!" ChibiKaz piped up.
Meep nodded. "Let us follow Eden!" she cried, and all three dissappeared at once.
Dante tackled Kaz. "WE GOTTA DO THE SAME THING, KAZ, OR WE WON'T GET KRISPY KREME DOUGHNUTS!" He shouted, shaking Kaz up.
"ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, JUST GET OFF ME!!" Kaz pushed off Dante and rushed back to tell Seph about the whole thing.
And now, the quest truly begins!!
"I can't believe we went all that way for nothing!" Seph groaned as the trio headed for Toronto. "Where the hell do we go now?"
Kaz looked at a nearby car delearship. "..... Seph, you're from an RPG and you don't know?"
"..... what? am I supposed to know everything??" Seph growled, annoyed by the fact Kaz was the mysterious ass-kicker that knew shit that the others could never hope to know.
Kaz laughed. "Seph, we go to the nearest town, that's how it is ALL THE TIME with these damned quest adventures, we're NOT supposed to know where to go!"
Dante was amazed by all this. "Wow, Kaz, how are you so smart..?" he asked, admiration in his voice.
".... the author of the fic made me smart, Dante, and besides, I'm the 'mysterious ass-kicker that knows shit that you guys can't hope to know'" Kaz replied, resigned to the fact they have to WALK to the next town.
Dante started hopping and skipping. "Yay! We're going on an adventure!"
That's it. I'm killing someone.
Kaz had his dagger raised and ready to strike Dante's back when Dante turned around.
"Um... Kaz, were you trying to kill me?"
Kaz pocketed the dagger. "...... of course not, Dante, do you think I would ever hurt you?"
".... No, cuz you're my friend!" Dante cried and he huggled Kaz AGAIN.
"OK, get off me before I really kill you." Kaz snarled, then Dante let go.
"OK-day!" Dante smiled, and he went back to hopping and skipping. Seph followed, yawning.
"Don't you think we should rest first?" Seph suggested.
"OF COURSE, YOU DUMBASS, THAT'S A BRILLIANT IDEA, WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT??" Kaz yelled, shaking with anger.
"......"
"......"
"......"
"OK, OK, I'm sorry, OK??" Seph yelled now. Apparently, they were all angry. Except Dante.
"No! Guys, don't fight!" Dante pleaded. Kaz looked at Dante. Kaz was actually a nice guy, so he deicided to avoid fights now.
"Look, I'm just stressed now, OK? Let's call this a truce." he mumbled. Seph looked at Kaz with surprise. Kaz never backed down from a fight. Even with his friends.
"... OK, sure." Seph agreed and Dante huggled them both.
"DDDAAAANNNTTEEE! GET OFF MEEEEE!"
