Chapter 2 - Take It All Away


* All the blue light reflections that color my mind when I sleep
And the lovesick rejections that accompany the company I keep
All the razor perceptions that cut just a little too deep
Hey I can bleed as well as anyone, but I need someone to help me sleep*

Angel was angry...more than angry. It was 4 in the morning and someone was pounding heavily on his front door. The last thing Angel needed was to be woken up. He had to be at work at 9am and he didn't get to sleep until after 2. His thoughts were the main thing that kept him awake and had done for over 5 years. Thoughts of the beach, the one person he loved more than his life, the son he never had and.... The knocking continued and Angel growled...the knocking stopped. Angel grabbed the door knob and pulled back the handle. He wasn't expecting the cheeky, thinned face and platinum blonde hair.

"Spike!" Angel growled dryly. "What do want?" Angel still standing in the doorway.

"Is that anyway to speak to the Childe you gave life...the un-human one I mean. Now are you going to let me in? Oh yes this a Vampires house so I can come and go." With that Spike pushed past Angel and stood just behind him.

Angel turned with such speed and strength, Spike was powerless to stop him as Angel grabbed Spike by the throat and slammed him into the wall.

"What ya."

"Lets try that again Spike. *Why are you here?*" Angel held him above the ground.

"Relax Peaches. The Slayer sent me. Watcher Guy and the Redhead have found a prophecy they thought you might be interested in."

Angel dropped Spike abruptly to his feet and turned away, bowing his head. "I don't do that stuff anymore."

Spike circled Spike looking smug. "That's right. Your still the bloody poof but you're a poof with an proper job. God, you're pitiful. What do you again?"

"I work in an office in Chicago city, I advise on history for TV programmes and films. I was there for most of it! I'm not a crime fighter anymore, you know that Spike. Anyway..." His face turned a little more darker. "...what are you doing running after Buffy and being the Scoobies messenger?"

Spike looked to the floor. "Something happened to me. You see I wanted...Why am I telling you this?"

"'Cos I'm bored and you wouldn't dare go back to Sunnydale and face Buffy without me!"

"Fair point. Well I was sick of being the whipped guy, I mean that's Xanders job. So I went to Africa, heard rumours there was a guy that could take out the chip. I had once been this Vampire that everyone feared. I had two Slayers to my name and was working on my third...Buffy. Do you have any alcohol mate?" Angel didn't say a word, he simply stood up and brought one of Doyles whiskey bottles and poured two glasses. Spike downed his in one and poured himself another one. "Now I am just a weak pathetic thing, demons laugh at me when they see me in the street, no one has an respect for me anymore. I got so sick of it, you know what I mean." Angel simply nodded. Spike took another glass. "So I see this mojo man in Africa and he puts me through all these tests, like this huge fire demon thing with huge..." Spike spread out his hands. "...fists which are on fire. Well you know me, never a Vampire to pass up a fight and naturally I win." Another drink. "So I'm standing there waiting for him to open up my head and me the Big Bad again and instead he does this chant thing and BANG, I have a soul."

Angel chose this moment to spit out his drink spraying it everywhere. "*You* have a *soul*? There can only be one souled Vampire, the scrolls say so."

"Don't get so defensive mate. That's why I'm here. The Watcher came back, he had some prophecy with him about Shansu....what ever that is." Angel immediately took attention. "It's about the angelic soul. We thought it meant something pure like Little Bit but then Watcher realised that you used to get call the 'demon with Angelic face' but we found out that Shansu means death. Sorry Peaches...your gonna die. Buffy wants you in SSSSunnydale where sssshe can protect you but I don't sssso there." Spike handed Angel a piece of paper. "This is when it is going to happen."

Angel all but grabbed the paper from Spike who tried to stagger to the door. Angel looked at the now empty whiskey bottle and sighed. "Spike you better stay here for tonight." Angel stated as he grabbed Spike, to stop him falling on his butt.

Spike turned around and hugged him. "I'm sorry that you're gonna die Peaches...I really am but you said it yourself. 'There can only be one.'" Spike hiccuped. "I think I've been watching Highlander too much."

Angel helped Spike onto the couch and drew the blanket over him. He smiled down in pity at his Childe and cringed. He looked at the piece of paper in his hand and read it to himself.

What Was One Must Now Come Three
To Let The World A Human See
The Death Of One Brings Life Another
Let The Father Join The Mother
Was Never Choice A Simple Thing
Bring Hearts Together, And Let Them Sing
And Never Was Life A Burden Bare
For Ticking Clock Could Never Scare

Angel stared at the riddle. He knew that this time it was a true prophecy, it was only the Powers could talk in such irrelevant rhyme. Angel looked at the clock, it read 03:30 and he knew he could last for two days without sleeping. There was only one person he knew in Chicago that could help him. Lindsey! Lindsey had joined another law firm, this time a normal, run-of-the-mill one, called Matherson and Partner. It seemed to Angel that Lindsey was trying to go straight but Angel knew that once a demon lawyer, always a demon lawyer. Angel roughly shock the drunken Spike and holed him to his feet.

"Come on Spike, you and me are going to have a little fun with a lawyer."

"I told you before Angel, I don't do kinky sex games anymore. Spike was still half asleep than more confused.

"Nope we're going to see a man about a prophecy."

So that is where Angel decided to go at 4am.

~~*~~

Lindsey awoke to a firm hand being clamped over his mouth to stop him screaming. His room was still dark as his good hand scraped around trying to find the light switch. Instead someone else turned it on and Lindsey wished he hadn't. For 5 years he hadn't seen 7ft moose-like creatures covered in slime or an inhuman face, but now there was one staring right back at him. Lindsey recognised the face immediately and almost choked in fear.

"Angel?" Lindsey muffled.

"Surprise Lindsey!" Angel muttered dryly.

"Yay Surprise!" Spike shouted more jovialy and jumped up and down on the spot.

Angel looked at Spike, rolling his eyes, then looked back to Lindsey. "Now, I know how hard it is to give up the old ways. I wanna know about Cordelia. I need to know where they are, what Cordelia is doing and how...how my...son is."

"Angel, stalking is your thing. I don't know anything about your Seer..."

"Ex Seer." Angel interrupted.

"No Angel, she is still a Seer. That is why there is Chase Investigations." Lindsey studied Angels face. "You really don't know anything about her anymore do you. Jesus Angel, how did you let a one like that go? If, and IF, I help you, what do I get out of this?" Lindsey smirked.

"You get to keep your good hand and various other parts of your body. Now I want to know everything about her and Conner."

Lindsey got out of bed and wandered into the living room. He sat down on the couch and motioned for Angel and Spike to do the same.

"Well Cordelia Chase lives in New York now, she has her own business called Chase Investigations which is exactly the same as Angel Investigations was. Trust me there was a Wolfram and Hart in New York but there isn't anymore she is that good. She gets visions and is one of the best fighters I have ever had the pleasure of watching, very agile and...flexible." Angel growled and Lindsey shrunk back. "She runs the business with a partner. Quite a money spinner."

"Ha...Angels ex-girlfriend makes more money than Angel... me opinion of you just went right down." Spike made a falling rocket sound.

Angels stolic face didn't move and instead he turned his arm and pushed Spike in the face. Spike fell back like a dead weight half way through his rocket impression.

"She's still single and has a house in the Hampton that only her partner is meant to know about. She has allot of enemies Angel, but then again she has *your* son! Talking of your brat. He has excelled in speed, strength and is a tad sensitive to the sunshine, guess he does take after his father after all. He's quite bright, goes to one the best schools in New York. Cordelia never did take up the acting after you left, mind you Angelus was right...she isn't very good is she. She's been in and out of hospital over the last 5 years Angel, too many close shaves meant she took a back seat and let other people take up the slack. Still fights though and she was wanted for murder at one point."

Angel took a double take. "What? Who did she kill?"

"Lilah Morgen. They tried to kidnap Conner from Kindergarten and she took her revenge. For the first time ever Lilah Morgen lost the head." Lindsey chuckled at his own joke.

"Was she cleared?"

Lindsey stopped chuckling. "Didn't even make it to court. They found a revenge attacker who was killing lawyers in LA and blamed him for Lilahs murder. Do you remember the case?"

"Yeah I seen the trial on CNN. Have you got an address?"

Lindsey reached to a book beside the couch and drew out a small card. "Better than that. I have a business card. Address, phone and fax number. They're happy together Angel. Now, I've told you what you wanted to, take your drunken lover home and leave me alone."

"Hey we're not lovers anymore!" Spike huffed. "God I'm starting to sober up. Come on Angel, we'll go drink to your death...again. Do you know, your worse than Buffy - nope that honour goes to Darla. I think they are having a little competition for how many deaths per 100 years. A couple whiskeys, couple of wenches. Come on Angel, let Angelus have a littl..." Spike was stopped by another swift punch to the face.

~~*~~

The darkness was overwhelming but that was the idea as Angel sat, away from the outside world and secluded to himself. The business card flipped over in his hands, unsure of which direction to take. It had been a while since Angel had sat in the dark, brooding about the past. A past that was kept in a box at the back of his mind, only opened on occasions when he felt life had become too good and he needed to be grounded. The business card fluttered to the floor as Angel lost his concentration, her face filling her head. He had tried not to imagine her face for each time he did his heart would twist, strangling his non-existent breath, tears would prick his eyes and the black hole would open in his mind. It would think of little else. He had given away the two things he loved more in the world but he took a little comfort to know that they had each other. Angel had spent the last 5 years and 6 days thinking about the life Conner has, had or could of had. From what Lindsey had told him, it seemed like Cordelia and Conner were fine...his brow creased as he worried about what Lindsey had said about Cordeila in hospital.

'But then he did say that Conner was happy with Cordelia.' He thought to himself. The business card fluttered to the bin. He began to walk away, to get ready for work but a voice, not Angelus, egged at him to turn back.

''No, they're happy! I won't disturb that.'' Angel argued

'He's your son, you should be there with him. *You're* his blood father. At least phone her.' The voice fought back.

Angel swivelled on his heel and turn back to the bin as if it had suddenly combusted. He ripped the business card from the trash and rolled it over in his hands again.


*And maybe I'll find out
A way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days
Then I hope there's someone there
Who can bring you back to me*


The phone shook in his hands as he dialled the numbers slowly. The New York number was foreign to him, long and giving him more time to slam the cradle back down. His nerve held and he managed to get through to the number. A cheery, overloaded voice filled his ears as he tore it away from his sensitive hearing.

"I was looking for Miss Cordelia Chase." Angel asked shakily.

"I am afraid Miss Chase is on holiday." He heard a rustling in the background. "Nobody has an appointment for the next two weeks. You can talk to our Vice President, Mr Gunn if it is urgent. What's the name please?"

Angels eyes became as wide as saucers. "Gunn? Charles Gunn." He quickly regained his composure. " Yes, I would like to speak to Mr Gunn please. My name is...O'Conner."

He heard a click then several beeps before someone on the other line picked up. "Yep. This is Charles Gunn." Angel sighed; it had been so long since he had heard that voice. He was scared that he never would hear it again but now he was terrified that the voice would reject him. "Mr. O'Conner?"

"Gunn? Gunn, it's Angel." He waited for the monotone tone that would tell him Gunn hung up but instead he heard met with silence. "Hello Gunn, are you still there?"

"Yeah man. Sorry, just...it's been so long man. What's wrong? A ghost the ghostbuster can't bust?"

Angel chuckled. For the first time in 5 years a small smile spread on his face. "No Gunn, I was looking for Cordelia."

He was met by more silence. "Dog, I don't think that's a good idea. She's different now, got Conner to think of."

"Please Gunn, I need to see her." Angel pleaded. Tears pricked his eyes again. "Conner's my son. I...I need to see him."

"I don't know. Are you still...you know...got the demon problem?" Gunn asked 'tactfully'.

"Yeah, but it's about to change. That's why I need to see Cordelia."

"I'll call her, Conner and her are on holiday and she ain't due back for a while. If she says yes, I'll give her your number but this time I'm staying out of it all. When you to are near each other, building explode." Gunn went silent again. "You know she never got over what you did; leaving like that."

"I know Gunn. Give her my number and I'll wait for her." Angel spieled off the Chicago number. He was about to put the phone down when something caught his attention. "Gunn, tell her I never go over her either."

With that the phone was back in it's cradle and the object that caught his attention was in his hands. The wooden frame faded and wore where it had been handled regularly. The same picture once stood proudly on his desk, where he could see it form every angle of the room. Cordelia stood proudly in the sun, Conner in her arms, wrapped in his baby blue blanket. Angel took the photo, hiding in the shadows...as he always did.

~~*~~

His car had picked Angel up in the shadows of his house and took him to the office building. He had began pacing a hole in the floor so decided he would be more use at work. It seemed forever that he sat by the phone but only 30 minutes has passed. The shrill ring surprised his and he let it ring. After the seventh ring he couldn't ignore it anymore, so he tentatively picked it up.

Lyrics by:
1) Mrs. Potters Lullaby - Counting Crows
2) Where Ever You Will Go - The Calling