Cliff Notes
Brought to you by the letter Q.
We find ourselves out behind the infamous Studio Thirteen, where Lia is surveying the deck where her brand spanking new hot tub is supposed to go when the truck delivers it, grinning fiendishly. She waves at the camera, carried by technical lackey Izzy Izumi, who wanders off to find Matt. Instead, yet another blonde motions him over to the director's chair he is sitting in, holding a virgin strawberry daiquiri.
"Um…you're Quatre Winner from Gundam Wing, aren't you?" Izzy asked nervously.
"Yes, I'm Quatre Raberba Winner. Pleased to meet you."
"Yeah. Where's Matt? This is his show, that he's supposed to be hosting…right now."
Lia walked onto the set, holding her very own virgin strawberry daiquiri and looking exceedingly guilty. She made a face at Quatre and then grinned sheepishly at Izzy.
"We…don't know. It started with this sudden, urgent fixation on Quatre at the beginning of the month, so I swapped Muses from Matt and Ken to Duo and Quatre. This brought about a sudden, urgent need to write Gundam Wing fanfics, and somewhere between starting that and working on the web-comic and running about buying all things Wing, Matt got locked in some closet somewhere and we haven't found him yet. So…Quatre's doing the show this time around."
"And on that note, welcome to Cliff Notes, I'm Quatre Raberba Winner, filling in for Matt. Snodin's Keepers arc has gotten very exciting in these new chapters, hasn't it, Miss Shadowmon?"
Said annoying cat appeared in her usual Nightcrawler smoke cloud. "Yeah! Hi there, Cat!"
"Hello. Would you like to take the review this week, Miss Shadowmon?"
"Sure! Kellen and his mysterious pet digimon, who turned out to be Calumon…stupid you, Lia…find Jun's digivice and send it her way. All of the Digidestined's parents get together…'cept for crazy Masaharu cuz that's his problem. Jun makes her way into the Digital World and practically wets herself she's so scared. But that's okay; cuz the Digiworld can be scary at times. And the gang is still looking for that Polarimon, and Yolei…stupid Yolei…has problems with Envymon, the Sin Digimon. And the other, not so cute Shadowmon attack. And Jun meets up with Penguinmon, who is very, very happy and very, very purple. And that's gonna be about it, Quatre. Lia didn't take any notes this time around…stupid you, Lia."
"Thank you anyway, Shadowmon. I'm surprised Gabumon hasn't shown up yet. From what I've heard, he always pops up and attempts to blow something up."
Patamon flapped in, wearing a very neglected Batpig cape. "Nah, he's not gonna. With Matt locked in a closet, he's run free around the Ishida apartment and done whatever the heck he wants. Saw the new Austin Powers movie, blew several of Matt's paychecks at the mall, harassed the bandies, that sort of thing. There's gonna be some serious hell to pay when that boy is out of that closet…or cabinet…or dresser drawer…wherever he might have been deposited."
"Oh," Quatre replied cutely, adjusting the collar of his favorite pink shirt. And yes, it definitely is pink. "Well, for Cliff Notes, I'm Quatre. If you'll excuse me now, I'm gonna finish my drink and head back to Gundam House. I'm quite certain chaos has broken loose and Trowa and I are usually the ones to take care of that."
Nicki walked in with Trowa and a couple of pina coladas. Said hyperactive still fifteen-year-old tossed Quatre a box of band-aids.
"Here ya go, Cat. You're so going to need them," she stated.
Lia returned with another glass of daiquiri, giggling slightly. "Nicki, remember that scary cockatoo man from that movie?"
"Somebody spiked your drink, didn't they?" Nicki asked, glaring as only Nicki can. Lia shrugged.
"Dunno. Cody gave it to me."
"Oh, then it's definitely spiked."
And somewhere, locked in a rather small closet, surviving only because he's a cartoon character and cartoons can live inside small closets for a very long time, Matt was starting his four hundred and thirty second chorus of the infamous "Ninety-Nine Bottles of Beer" song. In German. Backwards.
~*~
There was a random Pikachu in the new Austin Powers movie!
Winner: Should've been a random Gundam.
Maxwell: Yeah. Or a really, really big me.
Ichijouji: These things get stranger and stranger by the chapter.
I know. Don't you love me for it?
Kamiya: No. You'd better find Matt soon, or T.K. will be blowing things up.
Takaishi: Omae o korosu, fecking author girl.
