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" " : Indicates spoken words.
Italics : Indicates thoughts.
] [ : Indicates radio transmissions.
Aberrant Impact
Chapter 3
Tokyo 3, 2015; 7:46 A.M. NERV Central Hospital Intensive Care Ward, East Wing, Section Four, Nursing Station Four.
As she performed the menial task of data entry, Kieko Yamada felt her mind trying to focus on other things. Normally she did not allow herself to get too deep into introspection, at least while working. However, she was ahead in her work, and decided to allow her thoughts to wander a little bit, though she made sure that her work was being completed accurately. She had a slight, satisfied smile on her face, remembering her appointment to this position. She had gone to a NERV sponsored college, before she was even out of ninth grade. She had been put through an accelerated curriculum, getting a full graduation certificate by the age of sixteen, and becoming a registered nurse by eighteen.
Her smile widened, remembering how she'd reacted to her older sister's suggestion at trying for the NERV medical scholarship. "Oh, c'mon, Sis, I'm only fifteen! Why should I go for a college scholarship? I'm just in ninth grade!" she had said, not realizing how her life would change when she had allowed her sister to talk her into it. She had had excellent grades in school, in the top three percent of her class. That had been a requirement for the scholarship, as well as being young and open minded. She had been blessed with both qualities, though, at least when she was younger, she got nervous at times, especially when it came to her own abilities. And, although she was a fully registered nurse, a notable accomplishment for someone at her age, she was also studying to become a full doctor of intensive care.
That was why she was in her current position. NERV had offered it to her for two years, partly so she did not get burned out on schooling, as well as to see if she could handle the stress of an actual hospital environment. She was happy to say that she could handle the stress. I guess things are looking up for me, with all the stress of how things have gone in the last year, with the angels and all the people coming into the hospital... Even with all the hell in my personal life in the middle of last year... She leaned back slightly, stretching out the kinks that had started to develop in her forearms from the typing.
She went back over her last thoughts, and brought her arms back down, almost mechanically, staring blankly at the screen in front of her. She didn't like thinking about what had happened the prior fall. Too many painful memories would come to her, when she did. Memories about the return of the angels, and about what that had done to her last relationship. Why did that have to happen? Why was it necessary? she questioned herself, as she began to once again enter information into her computer, hoping the mechanical motions of the most boring aspect of her job take her from her memories. She knew it would only help a little bit, but she had to, when the memories came to her like this. Couldn't I have found a better way? Did it... Did it have to end like that? She sighed, rubbing her eyes briefly with her palms. I guess with that nightmare and all, I had a little bit more taken out of me last night than I thought... With that thought, she tried to force herself back into a more professional mode of thinking. It helped, at least a little, to push the memory from the forefront of her mind. Besides, she thought with a slight amusement, Iyume and Kyoki would be quite angry if they knew that their big sister was dwelling on that! Even though it didn't interfere in her life anymore, the moment of pain that she had had to endure to keep her family not only whole, but safe, still hurt. In fact, at times, it hurt immensely. However, as she thought of her family and the better part of her life, the memory faded to the back of her mind. In fact, she had largely forgotten the memory when a scheduling announcement came over the public address system. The announcement was particularly annoying as she was directly under a public address speaker, and the person using the system had the volume turned up to a fairly loud level.
Tokyo 3, 2015; 8:05 A.M. NERV Central Hospital Intensive Care Ward, East Wing, Section Four
A tired, weary Shinji Ikari walked through the Intensive Care Wing of the NERV Organization's Tokyo-3 Hospital, making his way towards a nursing station. His tired eyes seemed to barely focus on anything, and his rumpled clothing gave the impression of having been slept in. All in all he appeared to be completely unaware of his surroundings. That would be an incorrect assumption, however. He was quite aware of his surroundings as he walked along the hallway; being the Third Child, he had been trained to be more aware of things than most people. The apparent lack of awareness is the fact that he knows the hallways of this hospital better than a boy who had just recently turned fifteen should. Being a pilot of Eva Unit-01, and fighting against the powerful entities know as the angels, precluded injuries. In fact, he had been in this section of the hospital several times since becoming Unit-01's pilot. He stopped in his walk along the hallway, and looked out of a window, into the vast expanse of the Geofront. Surprisingly, most of the damage that he and the other two Children had done to the Geofront during their battle with the fourteenth angel, Zeurel, had been cleaned up.
He leaned forward, resting his hands on the cool, even, surface of the windowsill. He continued to look out, though he was in actuality focusing on everything around him at that moment. The hallways of the hospital were very utilitarian; clean, white, and devoid of ornamentation. He drew in a breath through his nose. The sharp tang of alcohol and other purifying agents and the cloying odor of various industrial cleaners caused his nose to wrinkle slightly in distaste. Other odors were present as well, barely noticeable to him. The stale, sickly smell of old blood commingled with the smell of new blood and other bodily fluids from the trauma ward just down the hall.
He glanced around from where he stood, then back down the way he had been going, almost scrutinizing the area. He saw a "Caution: Wet Floor" sign on the left side of the intersection ahead of him, the floor beyond the sign wet and glistening from being mopped recently. He noticed how the sill his hands rested upon was clean and free of the dust that normally inhabited such places. He was about to continue on to his destination, when his ears picked up upon the sounds of a nurse walking down the hall. Her shoes almost soundless on the linoleum, except for the occasional faint squeak the shoes made on the clean, almost pristine floor. He heard the life monitoring equipment in one of the nearby intensive care rooms. The constant beeping of the electrocardiogram and the ongoing rush of sound of from an oxygen line, as well as the quick, efficient movements of the nursing staff, lent a strange, unsettling cadence to the atmosphere of the hospital.
"I hate this place..." he sighed, letting his breath out slowly; his voice sounded almost lost in the echoless, sound dead hallway. His observations over, he continued on towards his destination. As he did, his thoughts then centered on one point, one question. If you hate this place so damn much, then what are you doing here, Ikari? the young man asked himself dubiously. He knew the answer, there was no doubting that. He was here to visit someone, to visit a girl that he knew. A young woman, more accurately. A young woman named Asuka Langley Sohryu. A young woman that he had very mixed feelings about. A young woman that he knew only one thing about for certain. He knew that he cared for her, and he did so with surprising strength. He could not understand, let alone explain, the reason he felt this way, even to himself. He just knew that he cared. He tried not to seem to be so deep in thought as he approached the nursing station for the intensive care area, managing to succeed, for the most part.
He came up to the counter of the nursing station, seeing a young nurse entering information into a computer terminal, her back to him. He was just opening his mouth to speak when he was interrupted by an announcement that came over the hospital's public address system, which seemed to have been turned up to an annoying level. "Sections Two and Three of the East Wing will be closing at six P.M. today." the announcer spoke, her voice sounding bored. "The staff has been requested to finish their work by approximately four thirty P.M. Thank you."
Tokyo-3, 2015; 8:14 A.M. Rei Ayanami Residence.
The young woman lying on the bed in apartment four-oh-two slowly awoke from her sleep, feeling a presence. Rei Ayanami slowly sat, then looked around the bedroom of her apartment, attempting to divine the source of the disturbance that woke her from her sleep. I... Was dreaming? She felt a slight sense of both wonder and, to her surprise, fear. Why did I dream? What was the purpose? Why was I awakened from it? Why does it make me feel fear to have had a dream? I do not like fear. It is... Disagreeable... She had no immediate answers for her questions. However, she felt that the presence that woke her could have the answers to her questions. She pondered what it was, and what it could want with her. What is this? Why is it so... Familiar? she pondered as she continued to glance around. Her eyes alighted upon the glasses that she had found in her nightstand drawer, now sitting on top of it. She picked them up, almost absently, as they offer her a strange kind of comfort. As she did so, she determined that the presence was not in her bedroom, but somewhere in or around the combined living and kitchen area. She stood from her bed and made her way out of her bedroom, her school uniform slightly rumpled from having been slept in, but otherwise looking as if she had recently donned it.
She stepped cautiously, yet purposefully into the living area of her apartment. She noticed that there was an unusual shadow, just inside of her bathroom. Many people would not expect her to notice such a fine detail, as she did not seem to notice anything beyond her direct surroundings. Rei is, however, a very observant young woman, her almost blood red eyes noticing details that some professionals would fail to notice. She stood where she was, not truly fearful, but concerned, none the less. "Who are you? Why are you hear?" she asked, her voice a calm monotone, pausing briefly. When she spoke again, a slight hint of curiosity was audible in her voice, "You the one that caused me to dream?"
The figure moved forward, revealing the same entity that had visited Rei's apartment earlier in the morning. She was still shrouded by a flowing cloak, her body covered by the same gossamer like body suit and veil as it had been before. The being nodded in conformation, and she spoke to Rei, who felt an almost familiar comfort in hearing the voice. "Good morning, Rei Ayanami."
This being is... A woman? Rei asked herself, and realized as she did that she did not fear this being. The being felt very familiar to her, though she could not place how. The last time she had confronted a being anything like this had been the angel, Tabris. Tabris had been different, however, with a subtle malice to his presence. This being seemed to her to be truly neutral. Is she an angel, or...?
"I am sorry, Rei, for interfering with your sleep in such a way." Her voice was honestly apologetic, and sincere. "I know you fear the images that come into your mind when you sleep, as did your second incarnation..." Rei felt curious as to how this being knew she hated dreaming, or that the second version of herself had as well, but she felt the question could wait for a time. Rei simply nodded in conformation to her statement. She did not like to admit it, but she did sometimes fear the dreams that came in her sleep, and she used her strong will to keep herself from dreaming. Except for this night, and she lacked the knowledge of why she had not felt fear, or why her will had allowed the dream to happen. Other than perhaps it was this being who had caused her will to slide that little bit, so she could dream. The dream had been pleasant, even with the implications this being and her own role in Third Impact could be different than she had always been told. Still, it had not been like her normal dreams, dreams filled with familiar images that were unfamiliar at the same time. Images with no emotion attached to them. "Do you remember the dream?" again, another nod from Rei. "Then you know why I am here..."
"Yes," she replied simply. "You are here to decide the path of humanity..."
"No..." the being answered emphatically, shaking her head. "I am to follow through with the wishes of those who will choose such, at the allotted place and time. You will be one of them, as I have told you in your dream." Rei again nodded at the being's statement, and lowered her head, as if in thought, because she knew the purpose she was created for, and felt that there was no real value to such a gathering. "You will need knowledge your soul does not currently posses, however."
"I will need knowledge?" she asked, then realized what the being had meant. "Yes, I understand. I have no true knowledge of life. Therefore, I could offer no meaningful contribution to those deciding humanity's path, other than what I was created for." Rei closed her eyes, as emotions boiled inside of her, emotions that she had no understanding of. Why am I angry? Why do I feel grief? I find this lack of knowledge to be disagreeable, can that be the reason for these emotions? I do not know... I know of my past, yet I do not feel my past, all I have are the vague images of the past. I have emotions, yet no connections from my emotions to the images... The images, they are just bare and lifeless, with no real meaning. Lifeless like me, like a doll. I do not want to be a doll...
An almost angry scowl spread across Rei's face, and when she spoke, it was with anger in her voice, "I am no one's doll..." The vehemence in her own feelings and voice surprised her. Rei felt a few tears flow from her eyes, startling her. "Why am I crying? I have lived for several weeks, yet I do not understand why I would cry." She looked fully at the being, who had moved into her living area from her bathroom. She floated for a moment above the floor, perhaps a quarter meter, then descended towards Rei, her cloak billowing about behind her. She set down about an arms length from Rei. . Her body was very fit, with strong yet supple curves, a lithe, taut musculature, and smallish breasts that gave the impression of a gymnast. Rei felt almost unnerved looking at the being, as she felt almost if as she were looking in a mirror. The only difference being that although Rei was standing straight, she merely stood as tall as the being's eyes, and she could not see the being's face through the veil.
"The innermost part of your soul knows why, it remembers, yet the emotions are hidden deep behind the barrier of your soul. Your dreams can take you to this place, to allow you to experience your past, to know it as intimately as if your mortal vessel had never changed." The being's voice was soft, yet it bore an unmistakable weight of what she was offering.
"If I do this, could I not become like Pilot Sohryu, lost within my own mind?" Rei asked, concern slightly tingeing her voice.
"You have a will that is strong, you will not become trapped within your mind." the being replied with surety, as if she had expected Rei's question.
"Yet Pilot Sohryu has a strong will as well." Rei stated, her monotone voice betraying no hint of her thoughts. "Should she not have been able to keep herself in reality, instead of becoming trapped by her memories?"
"Pilot Sohryu... Had a strong will." the being's voice was soft, regretful, as if she were hurt emotionally by the suffering Asuka had endured. "She was a prideful girl, however. Her pride had taken many blows, the easy defeat by those who were my brothers Bardiel and Zeruel..." the being before Rei seemed to shudder slightly, as if crying in sympathy for Asuka. Rei was unsure of how to react to this display of emotion, of sympathy for a human.
She said that they were her brothers... What does she mean by that? "You are an angel?" Rei asked, though she had suspected such since her first questions.
"At one time, yes, I was an angel..." The being looked down, as if in thought. "Yet that was a long time ago. I am now here to do something other than what I was brought to do. I have become something all together different, since I was an angel, I have become more human. I am similar to you Rei, in that I have human and angel DNA in my physical makeup, yet I have not grown with other humans, so I hope that I may be able to make my soul fully human. So no, I am not an angel... Does it bother you that I show sympathy for a member of humanity, whether I am angel or otherwise?" Rei shook her head, not knowing why, yet feeling as if she could trust the being, angel or otherwise. Neither did she feel fear of the being. "I am glad you feel this way. I am sorry for what the ones that were my brethren have done. I am especially sorry for what Arael did to Sohryu. That was... Unnecessary. She did not have to be forced to endure that pain. She should not have been forced to." Rei noticed blue light emanating from the cloak, shaped so that they appeared to be eyes. Rei was surprised to see the eyes within the cloak were hooded, as if the being were crying. Rei barely heard the being whispering as she once again looked down, as if in thought, "I tried to stop Arael, I tried to help you stop her, but I couldn't. They controlled me too well..." Rei looked upon the veil shrouded face and was honestly surprised to see tears staining the fabric. "If you do not wish to know of your past, I will... I will refrain from giving you the memories of your past, if that is what you wish." The being looked back up, the eyes still hooded, but a they seemed to hold a sad smile now, as well. "Though I would enjoy seeing your soul shine with the brightness it had once started to, ..." The being floated closer, her right arm partially outstretched, yet shrouded by the gossamer suit she wore.
"You say that you witnessed the brightness of my second body's soul. How is it that you were able to? Are the angels not brought into existence at the time they appear?" Rei asked, puzzled. Her confusion was evidenced on her face by a slight downturn of the inside of her eyebrows.
"Some of us existed since the rebirth of Adam. Tabris, Zeruel, Sachiel, myself... We were brought to the mortal coil only waiting for our time to show ourselves. I was... Originally, I was here on earth in a spirit form. I was drawn to this place, the Geofront, where I was trapped. I have been observing you since you were first... Conceived." The being's voice dropped slightly at the last few words, her voice hushed, and gentle. As Rei contemplated this change, the being spoke again, her voice neutral again. "The main difference between them and myself, is that I do not seek to rejoin with Adam... I seek to protect humanity, like you do... Like you... Like we did..." As she said the last few words, her tone barely a whisper.
Rei thought of asking what she had meant by the last statement, but she felt that another question needed answered first. "Which were you? Sachiel was the Angel of Destruction, Zeruel was the Angel of Strength, and Tabris was the Angel of Free Will. I would like to know what one you were supposed to be"
The being's eyes slowly changed from their hooded, grieving manner, to having an almost open, honest set to them. "I do not remember what purpose I was brought to the mortal coil for. I do know however, that I am no longer an angel." she said, her voice adamant as she spoke, "I will help the ones gathered at the allotted time and place decide humanity's path. I can not, however, proceed without you choosing to remember your past. I truly wish to let humanity choose where it will take itself, not to take that choice from them." The eyes seemed to soften, as if a warm smile came to the being's unseen face. "That is why I offer this choice to you."
"Why do you choose me?" Rei asked, her voice neutral and emotionless once again. "Why am I required to do so? Is it similar the purpose I was created for? Am I to be a doll for yet another..."
"No, dear child, nothing like that..." the being interrupted, her tone almost horrified. "I would never force that upon you. You will be a full participant in the decision if you choose to remember. Otherwise..." She let her statement fall off, which told Rei that it would change nothing if she chose to remain ignorant of her past.
I am... Frightened, to think of knowing these things. I would like to know, yet to learn so much, to become whole, in such a short time... I do not know if I could withstand the change." She looked back down, watching her tears fall from her eyes, to spatter off of her hands, and the glasses they held. "I do not even know if this is allowed to one such as myself..."
"You should not fear your past. The memories that your soul hides are your true memories, Rei Ayanami. They are a part of your soul, memories with emotion, not lifeless images and disjointed, unexplained emotions. If you do not choose to remember them now, some of the memories will come, but they will be incomplete. They will leave you with little choice in your path. I am offering you the choice of finding your own path. Of helping to forge humanity's own path..." She took a step closer to Rei, and lay a hand on her shoulder, her voice softening slightly, "As for whether or not it is allowed to you... Rei, you are as human as any other person you know, no matter that your DNA structure is half angel, or that you were created. Your soul is what determines this, your soul still has human qualities within it, even after being reintroduced into the mortal coil as it has! Take my hand, and I will open your mind to your dreams, and prepare within your dreams the path to your hidden memories. I will let you reunite you with yourself, and make your soul whole once again." The being looked down again, as if offering a choice she did not want to offer. "Or tell me that you would like to stay as your are, and events will follow the path they are currently on. I bear you no grudge either way."
As the being removed her hand and stood back slightly, Rei thought about what she had been offered, with the dream She shuddered involuntarily as the enormity of the offer hit her. Rei opened her mouth to speak, then she looked down, at her hands, and the tear spattered glasses they held. "I would very much like to know why these make me feel comfort, sadness, and even anger, all at one time. Yet I am afraid." her voice, while once clear, and with no hesitation, faltered when she came to the last statement. "So afraid..." her voice was barely a whisper, yet the being heard her as if she had spoken clearly.
"I will not bring harm to you, Rei, no matter the path you choose. I promise you this." The eyes were still cast as if the angel were smiling at her, and she felt the angel was telling her the truth. "If you choose to take my hand, you will fall into a dreaming sleep, of the memories and of the emotions of your past. Neither will you will not see me again until the allotted time, in the allotted place. I have other duties to perform. If you do not take my hand, you will not see me again, and I will cease to be on the mortal coil. I will send Tabris, the one who will open the chosen path in my stead, and the path to the Third Impact will go on as it is, unabated, and unperturbed."
"I... I must take a moment to decide." she said, the barest touch of nervousness in her voice. She felt her control returning as she reigned the emotions in, her tears ebbing to nothing, and her face returning to it's former monotone.
The angel's eyes narrowed slightly, as if in humor, and a very feminine laugh, emanated from the cloak. "If you must, to make your decision. However, do not take too long, as I am only allowed in your presence for..." the angel looked off into nothingness, as if looking at a clock, and turned back to Rei. "...Until your clock reads forty-five minutes past the hour."
Rei nodded, understanding the shortness of time she had. Only six minutes to decide. She closed her eyes in contemplation her head lowered. She thought of the memories as she now knew them, and how they could be different with the emotions attached to them returned. She knew of one memory she had that held emotion, the emotion of anger. It was not long after Pilot Ikari had been taken into the twelfth angel... She remembered how Asuka had tried to hide her concern over Shinji being absorbed into the angel by blaming him for it, when she had been just as responsible. She remembered, vaguely, how there had been an anger welling within her, barely contained by her will. Anger at Asuka's comments about first Shinji, then asking if she was angry. I had asked her if she only piloted for the praise of others... Everything was tinted in red, the color I-... The color... I hate... Her remembrance came to a halt, her eyes widening. She had her answer for the being standing in front of her, and the time was eight thirty-five A.M. "I would very much like to know... To remember and experience everything. Yet, what you offer me is frightening, more frightening than my dreams. Even... Even more frightening than the purpose of my creation. I... I have decided..." Her tone was almost apologetic as she spoke. She raised her head, sighing, and looked into the being's eyes, with a small, almost regretful, smile.
