A/N: Okay, I lied, no climax this chapter…maybe the next one. J Hopefully I'll be posting that soon.
Disclaimer: I don't own ANYTHING.
Chapter 7
Dear Mister and Mistress Mystery,
I personally think that the reason you hate each other so much is because you have a passion for each other deep within. You may be just trying to convince yourselves that you do like each other with those hateful letters that you've been writing.
Psychoanalytic Student
Dear Mystery Man and Woman,
I predict that you will die a mysterious death if you do not resolve your problems.
Professor Trelawney
Dear Mystery People,
Get a room.
Horny Male
Dear Mysteries,
Maybe you should have a duel.
Violent Urges
Dear MM & MW,
I was wondering if you could help me with a problem that I've been having. There's this guy that I like, and he's one of my friends. I think he might like me too but I'm not sure. How do I approach him on the subject?
Confused Crony
Dear Mystery Man,
I personally think that you should see if you can romance Mystery Woman into
liking you. I mean, as you said, you can get any girl in this school. Think of it as a challenge.
Romancing Romeo
Dear CJ,
Who's this ******* ex-boy-friend of yours? I could beat the crap out of him if you wanted me to.
Pounding Pulverizer
Dear Mystery Students,
I think that you should talk out your differences. As a concerned faculty member I do believe that there is much family rivalry, or something of the sort between you two. Maybe if you talk you would find that you have much in common.
Concerned Professor
Dear Mystery WOMAN,
Beat the **** out of that chauvinistic pig!
Femmy Feminist
Dear Mystery Persons,
I agree with Violent Urges have a duel!
Duelmeister
Dear Mystery Children of Mother Earth,
Give peace a chance! Why can't we all just get along? Kiss and make up J.
Flower Child
Mystery Woman,
I could sic Fang on that Mystery Man for you.
Hagrid
Dear Mystery Man & Woman,
I know of a potion that could resolve this whole situation.
Prof. S.S.
Dear Mystery Woman,
If you want, we could give you a makeover, so all guys…and some girls will be turning their heads at you.
Make-up Majors
Dear M.M.
We are starting a fan club for all of your letters!
Beautiful Girls Society
