Title - I Miss You Tonight
Rating - PG13
Parts - 1/1
Author - Heh.. guess who? Meh!..
Email - Michiruka@hotmail.com
Disclaimer - I don't own Sailor Moon, tho if they wanna hand over the rights of Haruka and Michiru
I'd be more than happy to take them!! *chuckles* Nor do I own the song, 'Richard Marxism', which
was sung by Mest.. Love that group... I don't own anything else that I talk about either... seeing
as it just shows up when I write from the top of my head...
Author's Note: Okay... so, it's 1 in the morning and this idea just kinda popped into my head while
I was listening to this wonderful song.. Okie, its a Rei/Usa fic... Uhm... Basically, Mamoru is a
really big jerk and welp, hopefully itll turn out alright and stuff... who knows? Maybe I'll chapter
the fic.. *hears 'Oooooh's coming from the crowd* Yesh, I know... Me and chapter fics usually _don't_
happen.. lol.. Anyways... On with the fic!! Oh, yeah.. heh... It'll start out with a little flash
back, but it's all in Usagi's POV K? Yeah... heh..
'...' = thoughts
"..." = talking
= song
Member.. this is yuri.. no like, no read... Like? Review... ^^
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~Flashback~
Rei chuckled softly and looked into my eyes. I couldn't believe that just a week ago she confessed
that she had a crush on me. Of course, I re-acted in a horrible manner and she thought I hated her.
She couldn't be more wrong. I loved her, as more than a friend. The only thing standing in our way
was Mamoru.
"So, when are you planning on telling him?" Rei asked softly. She always knew what was on my
mind without me telling her.
"I.. uh.. I don't know. But, it'll be soon. I promise."
The truth was, I didn't know how to tell him. I didn't want to hurt him, that was the last thing
I wanted to do. I knew it would devastate him to find out that well, I want to leave him for my best
friend. Actually, that sounded kind of funny to me. Rei startled me slightly, wrapping one arm around
my waist as we stood on a bridge over-looking a river. It was a rather beautiful site. I leaned into
her, smiling softly, enjoying just being in her presence. Little did I realize, someone stood behind us,
watching our every move.
"Ya know Odango, I never thought I'd be able to hold you like this." Rei said suddenly.
I blushed softly and turned to face her. She smiled at me and leaned in, kissing me softly.
I slowly wrapped both of my arms around her neck, kissing her back and only broke away when I heard
someone behind us inhale sharply. We both pulled apart fast and turned to see who was there. I gasped
when I saw him standing there, hatred etched on every feature of his face. I couldn't believe he was
spying on me.
"Mamo-chan.. please. Let me explain. Really, it's.. it's not what it looks like." I pleaded
with him.
"Don't.. call me that anymore. I.. I can't believe you'd cheat on me. Why? Am I not good enough?
Why the hell did you.. No, wait. Don't even talk to me anymore." he said. You could hear the hatred he
felt toward us in his voice.
"Mamoru.. wait. Don't hate her. It's my fault... I-" Rei was cut off by him screaming at us to
shut up.
He turned and took off down the path. I stood there, staring at his retreating figure. I didn't want
him to find out like that. I thought if I had told him, he'd take it better. I sighed softly and blinked back
some tears. Rei touched my shoulder lightly but I pulled away from her touch. I could tell that my actions had
hurt her, but at the moment, I didn't care. I turned, and started to walk away.
"Odango, hold up. I'll walk you h-"
"I need to be along right now. I'm sorry.. but.. maybe this was a mistake." I replied softly, cutting
her off.
I heard her gasp slightly. I could feel the twang of pain in my heart, but I kept walking. I had already
caused enough pain, I didn't want to cause anymore by leading her on, only to turn back to Mamoru. I had to let
her go. I quickened my pace, not wanting to hear her pleading sobs anymore. I couldn't stand hurting them both,
but I didn't think I had a choice at that point.
~End Flashback~
I don't know what to say
I didn't mean to f*** up in this way
I wandered around town aimlessly. It's been three months and still, I haven't talked to either of them.
I wondered if they had forgiven me. Or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me ever again. I sighed, knowing I
was the cause of all the pain we had suffered. I shouldn't have been so selfish. I wanted Rei back, not Mamoru.
I needed her, I wanted her, but every time I tried to tell her that, she just turned away from me. It's not like
I blame her, but the words she says to me. They hurt, a lot. More than I could ever imagine. 'Aww.. who am I kidding?
What did you expect? To show up at her door and all to be okay again?' I shook my head. This was going to be
harder than I wanted it to be.
"Usagi! Hey, wait up!"
I turned at the sound of my friend's voice and put on a fake smile. It's not like I wasn't happy to see
her. It was that I didn't want to hear about her lastest boyfriend. Although, we've always suspected something
was going on between her and Setsuna, but I'll save that for another time.
"Hey Minako. How're you doing?" I replied, still keeping my wonderfully fake smile on.
"I just met the most wonderful guy. Kami, was he gorgeous! I think he's the one... or maybe he isn't. Oh,
do you think he'll hurt me? Oh, he's to wonderful to..."
She just droned on and on. I swear, I wanted to make a comment to make her shut up, but I didn't. I was
going to be nice today. No comments. 'Maybe I should ask her how Setsuna's doing..' I thought. I chuckled to myself,
not realizing how sinister it sounded. I noticed Minako had stopped talking and was looking at me strangely. I
blushed from embarrasement and shook my head.
"I'm sorry Minako. Was there something you wanted? Because.. well, I'd much like to be alone r-"
"Oh yeah! I wanted to see how you were doing these days. Ya know, no Sailor business and such and none of
us has seen you for like, ever now. We were all wondering if you'd like to get together with us. Like old times."
My heart jumped into my throat as she uttered those words. "I... uh.. is Rei... I mean... er... Well, I
don't know..."
"Oh.. yeah, I forgot. I'm sorry I brought it up. Just... forget I mentioned it."
"No, wait. It's alright," Fake smile time again, "When is it?" 'This'll be my chance to make Rei listen to
me... Thankyou Minako.'
"Really? You'll go? Oh, yay! Okay, it's on Saturday. We're all meeting at Makoto's house. Bet you miss her
cooking," this brought a smile to my face. A real one. "So, like, be there at noon. Okay?"
I nodded and watched her run off. I started back on my way towards wherever I was headed. Of course, I knew
where I'd end up. 'You shouldn't do this to yourself Usagi. Don't go there.' I kept trying to persuade myself to leave,
go home. Whatever. Apparently it didn't work because I ended up in the park, on a bridge over looking a river. I leaned
against the railing, burying my face in my hands. I started crying, softly at first, but it became more violent as I let
the memories over come me. I didn't mean to do this to her, I loved her. Honestly, I wanted to be the one she looked at
with the passion that she used to. What would I say to her when I saw her Saturday? 'Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to
leave you that night three months ago. Can we get back together now? Ugh... what am I going to do?' I sniffled, trying
to calm myself down. Then, I panicked. It was Friday. Well, okay. Friday night, obviously. But still, I had to see her
tomorrow. 'Shimatta!' I thought, dashing off towards my house.
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shouldn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
I sat on Makoto's couch, staring at the floor, playing with the end of my hair. I had been here for about an
hour and still, I haven't said much of anything. I kept stealing glances at Rei, hoping I'd catch her looking at me, but
she looked so unhappy to be here. It's probably because I'm here. 'Of course it's because your here... You know that...'
I sighed heavilly, not bothering to make it quiet. Ami glanced in my direction, concern obvious in her eyes. I shot her a
fake smile, which she seemed to by, and leaned back into the couch. I looked around, wondering if I should join the
conversation or not. I wasn't even sure what they were talking about.
"What do you think Usagi?" Makoto asked.
Startled I looked over at Makoto, "Huh..?"
I heard a few chuckles and I blushed darkly.
"Leave it to Usagi to get lost on a simple topic," Minako said.
"You guys are soooo mean! So I wasn't paying attention. I'm sorry!" I shot back.
"Honestly, can't we ever get together without _someone_ starting a fight?" Ami asked.
"Not when odango is around," Rei replied.
'That hurt...' "Shove it, Rei...What were we talking about guys?" I asked, noticing the hurt look on Rei's face.
'Er... ooh, I didn't mean to hurt her... Ugh.. I'm such a blonde.'
"We were talking about who's better. Spider-Man or Superman," Makoto answered polietly.
I stared at them in disbelief. They interrupted my thoughts to know who I thought was better? Ohy, couldn't they
think of something better to talk about? Like, whom Minako had a crush on now or if Rei had someone else in her life now.
I mean, come on. Give me something that is worth arguing about or something. This was pathetic.
"I personally think they both suck. Venom was pretty cool for a villian though," I replied, smirking.
"Oh you've got to be kidding! The green dude from Spider-Man was a way better villian!" Minako argued.
"No way! I think..."
I started not paying attention again. This was hopeless. Not to mention extremely boring. Mind-numbingly boring.
'Is that even a word?' I thought. I shook my head and stood up. I needed some fresh air or something. I walked out onto
Makoto's balcony and leaned against the railing. I listened to the laughter inside and I felt a familiar pain in my heart.
I remembered the way Rei use to make me laugh like that. I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I wiped it away. 'This isn't
the time for this Usagi. Get ahold of yourself.' I felt someone walk up next to me and I turned my head to see who it was.
"Oh.. hey Rei."
"Evening..."
I don't know what to say
I think I know why you look this way
This was torture. She was so close and I couldn't do anything about it. I wanted to just kiss her, make the pain
go away, but I knew it was because of me that she was in pain to begin with. I turned back and looked up at the moon. I
smiled, remembering the night she said she loved me. She was so nervous. I noticed that she fidgited next to me, so I moved
down a bit, giving her some room. I thought I heard her sigh, but I shook it off. She was about to turn and leave, so I
started talking to her again.
"Pretty out, isn't it?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah it is."
She turned back, and leaned against the railing next to me. Okay, that was good.
"So... uhm... how have you been doing?"
"As good as can be expected. You?"
'Miserable...' "Alright, I suppose. Uhm.. how's... life?"
"Sucks, but hey. What else is new? It...nevermind."
'Okay, I'm getting somewhere.' "Sucks? How c- oh.. Uhm.. You know I'm sorry about that, right?"
She looked at me and I could see the hurt in her eyes. Did I really cause that much pain. I mean, really, she looked
like her world crashed down before her eyes. I turned away from her gaze, on the verge of letting down my barrier. I wanted
to take that pain from her. Make it mine, but I knew I couldn't. I never would be able to take back what I said. I just...
I wanted one more chance. Just one more. That's all I would need to prove that I loved her. I opened my mouth to say something,
but she beat me to it. Bringing down my world as well.
"You killed me that night Usagi. Do you know how much it hurts seeing you right now? Do you?! Why the hell did you
do that to me Usagi? Why?"
I could hear her voice cracking as she said those words. I felt my heart shatter after she said that. I couldn't
answer her though. I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do at the time. I honestly regretted it after I said
the words.
"Let me guess, Odango. You can't think of a good reason for leaving me, can you?"
"I don't know why I left you, alright?!"
"Sure, whatever."
"Rei, this isn't fair! I regret what I said... I do. If I could go back in time, stop myself from saying them. I would.
But I can't! And I'm sorry... Kami, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, right. Kami, Usagi. You tore my heart apart... You took awa-"
'That's it! I can't take this anymore!' I grabbed her shoulders and kissed her fiercely. She was shocked at first, which
was normal. I noticed she stiffened slightly before finally giving into the kiss, wrapping her arms around my waist. It felt so
right. So.. perfect. I loosely wrapped my arms on her shoulders, deepening the kiss. I felt like I was in heaven. I didn't want it
to end, in fear of what might follow. I didn't want my heart broken again. It hurt enough right now, I wouldn't be able to handle anymore.
She pulled away from, flushed and out of breath. I smiled slightly, barely noticable. She looked into my eyes and I noticed... love?
Maybe it was lust. I couldn't tell.
"Is this real Usagi? Oh, tell me this isn't a dream. Kami, I can't take another dream..."
'She dreams about me..?' "No, it's not Rei."
She smiled and laid her forehead against mine. I ran my fingers over her cheeks and promised myself I wouldn't hurt her
ever again. I wouldn't be able to bare it if I did.
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shouldn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
Rei and I walked along, hand-and-hand through the park. It's been about three months since that night on Makoto's balcony.
I made sure not to hurt her anymore than I already had. The pain I went through was unbearable and I couldn't begin to imagine how
Rei felt. I hated myself for saying those words to her. But, that was past us now. I'm happy now, so is she. I glanced up at her and
she looked a little.. pre-occupied. Frowning, I asked her what was on her mind, only to be greeted by silence. I tapped her shoulder
and she looked startled at first, then turned to face me, smiling slightly.
"Nani?"
"What's on you mind?" I repeated.
"Hm? Oh, nothing."
"Are you sure? Cause you look pre-occupied..."
"I'm sure Odango... don't worry."
She leaned down and kissed me softly to re-assure me that everything was fine. I wanted to believe her, but for some reason,
I couldn't. Something inside me told me that things weren't alright. I pulled back slightly, noting that she realized I didn't believe
her. I looked at the ground, leaning into her. For some reason, I didn't think I'd be able to hear what she had to say. I started hearing
a little voice in the back of my head, telling me things were wrong. That it wouldn't work out for us. I didn't want to believe it, but
this nagging feeling in my gut told me to believe other-wise.
"Odango... don't you believe me?"
"I.. I want to.. but..."
"Usagi, please listen to me. Nothing is wrong. I promise..."
I looked up at her, into her eyes, and they told me different. I forced a smile and nodded. Why was she lying to me? Didn't she
think I could handle it? We continued to walk along, as I stared at the ground the entire time. I hated the feeling of betrayal, the feeling
that I was going to be hurt again. I couldn't shake the feeling either. She wrapped her arm around my waist, holding my close and I shoved
all of my doubts and fears into the back of my mind. They could wait til tomorrow. I was happy right now. And that's all that mattered at the
moment. We stopped by some trees and a small lake. She led me over to a rather large tree, sitting down and leaning against the trunk. I sat
beside her, laying my head on her shoulder. She wrapped one arm around my shoulder, gently stroking my hair.
"Aishiteru, Odango."
I smiled and replied, "Aishiteru, Rei."
I leaned up and kissed her cheek softly. She smiled and we just sat there, watching the lake as the sun slowly began to set. We must
have sat there for hours watching the lake. It was begining to get chilly and I was begining to fall asleep. Rei must have noticed because
she shook my shoulder lightly and asked if I was ready to leave. Nodding, we stood up and slowly walked in the direction of my house. I didn't
want the night to end, but I knew I had to get home before my dad flipped out. When we reached my house, I turned to her and again she looked
like she was in a totally different world. She looked into my eyes and smiled, then leaned down and kissed me softly.
"Goodnight, tenshi," she said softly.
"Goodnight, koi. Aishiteru..." I replied before turning and entering my house.
I shut the door and leaned against it, sighing deeply, not knowing Rei had done the same thing on the other side. I didn't want to realize
that my heart was going to get broken, but I knew it was. I slowly climbed the stairs to my bedroom and flopped down onto my bed. I began to run
through the many things that could be wrong, all of them pointing to her not loving me anymore. I didn't want to believe it, but the images of her
face tonight kept appearing in my mind. She seemed so happy just a couple of nights ago, I wonder what happened between then and now. 'Maybe I should
ask her tomorrow or something... but then she might think I don't love her...' I sighed, curling up into a ball on my side. I felt the tears stinging
my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Luna had jumped onto my bed, scaring me a bit.
"What's wrong Usagi? You look like your about to cry," she asked, curling up next to me.
"Nothing Luna..."
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
I sat on my bed, hugging my pillow tight, crying silently. A week ago, my koi had broken my heart by telling me she didn't love me anymore. I
couldn't believe it. Just like that she told me. I ran from her, crying. I had wanted her so badly and now, I'd never be with her again. The pain was
unbearable. I had no one to turn to, no one to comfort me. Atleast, not there with me anyway. I got up and walked outside, just letting myself walk around.
Needless to say, I ended up infront of her house. I looked up the steps, seeing that she was outside sweeping. It killed me to see that she wasn't the least
bit upset. I rushed away from there, not wanting to see her any longer. I walked around more and ended up at someone else's house. The person's house
surprised me but I walked up the door and knocked anyway. When they answered, they looked surprised to see me, but invited me in anyway.
"What brings you here, if I may ask?"
"I.. I don't know. Comfort, I guess... I need someone to talk to..."
She nodded and smiled, leading me to the couch. We sat down and I began to talk, telling her everything and anything that came to mind. She just sat
and listened to me, which is was I needed the most. Then, I began crying and she took me into her arms, rocking back and forth slightly, trying to calm me down.
The sobs made my body shake, the tears streamed down my cheeks. I buried my face into her shoulder, not caring that I was soaking her shirt. Apparently, she didn't
care either. When my crying finally ended, I pulled away, blushing from embarrasement. She assured me that it was alright, but I apologized anyway. She smiled and
glanced at the ground.
"What's wrong?"
"Oh.. it's just that.. You deserve better than that Usagi. Honestly, you shouldn't have to deal with the pain."
Shocked, I listened. Was she trying to tell me something? She glanced up at me and uttered those words that would change my life forever.
"Usagi... I.. Well, I love you."
I blushed, looking at the ground. Why did I feel like this was right? I couldn't be in love with her... could I? She profusely apologized for the comment,
and I could hear that hurt in her voice. I looked up at her, shaking my head slightly as to say that it was alright. I started to lean in, slowly. When my lips meet
hers, I let my eyes fall shut and gave into my feelings. Maybe I really loved her, maybe I was on the rebound. All I knew at the moment was how right the whole thing
felt at the moment. When he finally gave into the kiss, I moved in closer, wrapping my arms around her waist as she wrapped hers around my waist. When we broke the
kiss, we were both flushed and slightly out of breath.
"This... is this..."
"I-I don't know... but lets not think about that now..."
She smiled at me and nodded. Rei may have broken my heart, but I didn't care right now. All that mattered right now was this very moment. Maybe I wasn't meant
to be with Rei, or the person next to me, but I know now that I'll only find out by trying. I kissed her once more softly before resting my head on her shoulder. I
wasn't going to let anything ruin this moment, nor was anyone going to kill my spirits. Right now, I was happy. Content. I felt safe and I wanted to stay here, with her,
til all the pain was gone. I knew that might take a while, but it didn't bother me. I felt like I had found someone who wasn't going to break my heart and I wasn't about
to trade that for the world.
"I.. I think I love you too..."
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shoudn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shoudn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
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Like? Don't like? Care to guess at whom she fell in love with at the end? Haven't a clue...? Wanna find out? Heh... Review... Though,
I probably won't tell you who the person is.. *smirks* Anyways... if enough people ask, I'll do a another one, continuing where this
one left off.. and then you will find out who the person is.. Mwuhahaha.. ^^
Rating - PG13
Parts - 1/1
Author - Heh.. guess who? Meh!..
Email - Michiruka@hotmail.com
Disclaimer - I don't own Sailor Moon, tho if they wanna hand over the rights of Haruka and Michiru
I'd be more than happy to take them!! *chuckles* Nor do I own the song, 'Richard Marxism', which
was sung by Mest.. Love that group... I don't own anything else that I talk about either... seeing
as it just shows up when I write from the top of my head...
Author's Note: Okay... so, it's 1 in the morning and this idea just kinda popped into my head while
I was listening to this wonderful song.. Okie, its a Rei/Usa fic... Uhm... Basically, Mamoru is a
really big jerk and welp, hopefully itll turn out alright and stuff... who knows? Maybe I'll chapter
the fic.. *hears 'Oooooh's coming from the crowd* Yesh, I know... Me and chapter fics usually _don't_
happen.. lol.. Anyways... On with the fic!! Oh, yeah.. heh... It'll start out with a little flash
back, but it's all in Usagi's POV K? Yeah... heh..
'...' = thoughts
"..." = talking
= song
Member.. this is yuri.. no like, no read... Like? Review... ^^
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~Flashback~
Rei chuckled softly and looked into my eyes. I couldn't believe that just a week ago she confessed
that she had a crush on me. Of course, I re-acted in a horrible manner and she thought I hated her.
She couldn't be more wrong. I loved her, as more than a friend. The only thing standing in our way
was Mamoru.
"So, when are you planning on telling him?" Rei asked softly. She always knew what was on my
mind without me telling her.
"I.. uh.. I don't know. But, it'll be soon. I promise."
The truth was, I didn't know how to tell him. I didn't want to hurt him, that was the last thing
I wanted to do. I knew it would devastate him to find out that well, I want to leave him for my best
friend. Actually, that sounded kind of funny to me. Rei startled me slightly, wrapping one arm around
my waist as we stood on a bridge over-looking a river. It was a rather beautiful site. I leaned into
her, smiling softly, enjoying just being in her presence. Little did I realize, someone stood behind us,
watching our every move.
"Ya know Odango, I never thought I'd be able to hold you like this." Rei said suddenly.
I blushed softly and turned to face her. She smiled at me and leaned in, kissing me softly.
I slowly wrapped both of my arms around her neck, kissing her back and only broke away when I heard
someone behind us inhale sharply. We both pulled apart fast and turned to see who was there. I gasped
when I saw him standing there, hatred etched on every feature of his face. I couldn't believe he was
spying on me.
"Mamo-chan.. please. Let me explain. Really, it's.. it's not what it looks like." I pleaded
with him.
"Don't.. call me that anymore. I.. I can't believe you'd cheat on me. Why? Am I not good enough?
Why the hell did you.. No, wait. Don't even talk to me anymore." he said. You could hear the hatred he
felt toward us in his voice.
"Mamoru.. wait. Don't hate her. It's my fault... I-" Rei was cut off by him screaming at us to
shut up.
He turned and took off down the path. I stood there, staring at his retreating figure. I didn't want
him to find out like that. I thought if I had told him, he'd take it better. I sighed softly and blinked back
some tears. Rei touched my shoulder lightly but I pulled away from her touch. I could tell that my actions had
hurt her, but at the moment, I didn't care. I turned, and started to walk away.
"Odango, hold up. I'll walk you h-"
"I need to be along right now. I'm sorry.. but.. maybe this was a mistake." I replied softly, cutting
her off.
I heard her gasp slightly. I could feel the twang of pain in my heart, but I kept walking. I had already
caused enough pain, I didn't want to cause anymore by leading her on, only to turn back to Mamoru. I had to let
her go. I quickened my pace, not wanting to hear her pleading sobs anymore. I couldn't stand hurting them both,
but I didn't think I had a choice at that point.
~End Flashback~
I don't know what to say
I didn't mean to f*** up in this way
I wandered around town aimlessly. It's been three months and still, I haven't talked to either of them.
I wondered if they had forgiven me. Or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me ever again. I sighed, knowing I
was the cause of all the pain we had suffered. I shouldn't have been so selfish. I wanted Rei back, not Mamoru.
I needed her, I wanted her, but every time I tried to tell her that, she just turned away from me. It's not like
I blame her, but the words she says to me. They hurt, a lot. More than I could ever imagine. 'Aww.. who am I kidding?
What did you expect? To show up at her door and all to be okay again?' I shook my head. This was going to be
harder than I wanted it to be.
"Usagi! Hey, wait up!"
I turned at the sound of my friend's voice and put on a fake smile. It's not like I wasn't happy to see
her. It was that I didn't want to hear about her lastest boyfriend. Although, we've always suspected something
was going on between her and Setsuna, but I'll save that for another time.
"Hey Minako. How're you doing?" I replied, still keeping my wonderfully fake smile on.
"I just met the most wonderful guy. Kami, was he gorgeous! I think he's the one... or maybe he isn't. Oh,
do you think he'll hurt me? Oh, he's to wonderful to..."
She just droned on and on. I swear, I wanted to make a comment to make her shut up, but I didn't. I was
going to be nice today. No comments. 'Maybe I should ask her how Setsuna's doing..' I thought. I chuckled to myself,
not realizing how sinister it sounded. I noticed Minako had stopped talking and was looking at me strangely. I
blushed from embarrasement and shook my head.
"I'm sorry Minako. Was there something you wanted? Because.. well, I'd much like to be alone r-"
"Oh yeah! I wanted to see how you were doing these days. Ya know, no Sailor business and such and none of
us has seen you for like, ever now. We were all wondering if you'd like to get together with us. Like old times."
My heart jumped into my throat as she uttered those words. "I... uh.. is Rei... I mean... er... Well, I
don't know..."
"Oh.. yeah, I forgot. I'm sorry I brought it up. Just... forget I mentioned it."
"No, wait. It's alright," Fake smile time again, "When is it?" 'This'll be my chance to make Rei listen to
me... Thankyou Minako.'
"Really? You'll go? Oh, yay! Okay, it's on Saturday. We're all meeting at Makoto's house. Bet you miss her
cooking," this brought a smile to my face. A real one. "So, like, be there at noon. Okay?"
I nodded and watched her run off. I started back on my way towards wherever I was headed. Of course, I knew
where I'd end up. 'You shouldn't do this to yourself Usagi. Don't go there.' I kept trying to persuade myself to leave,
go home. Whatever. Apparently it didn't work because I ended up in the park, on a bridge over looking a river. I leaned
against the railing, burying my face in my hands. I started crying, softly at first, but it became more violent as I let
the memories over come me. I didn't mean to do this to her, I loved her. Honestly, I wanted to be the one she looked at
with the passion that she used to. What would I say to her when I saw her Saturday? 'Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to
leave you that night three months ago. Can we get back together now? Ugh... what am I going to do?' I sniffled, trying
to calm myself down. Then, I panicked. It was Friday. Well, okay. Friday night, obviously. But still, I had to see her
tomorrow. 'Shimatta!' I thought, dashing off towards my house.
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shouldn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
I sat on Makoto's couch, staring at the floor, playing with the end of my hair. I had been here for about an
hour and still, I haven't said much of anything. I kept stealing glances at Rei, hoping I'd catch her looking at me, but
she looked so unhappy to be here. It's probably because I'm here. 'Of course it's because your here... You know that...'
I sighed heavilly, not bothering to make it quiet. Ami glanced in my direction, concern obvious in her eyes. I shot her a
fake smile, which she seemed to by, and leaned back into the couch. I looked around, wondering if I should join the
conversation or not. I wasn't even sure what they were talking about.
"What do you think Usagi?" Makoto asked.
Startled I looked over at Makoto, "Huh..?"
I heard a few chuckles and I blushed darkly.
"Leave it to Usagi to get lost on a simple topic," Minako said.
"You guys are soooo mean! So I wasn't paying attention. I'm sorry!" I shot back.
"Honestly, can't we ever get together without _someone_ starting a fight?" Ami asked.
"Not when odango is around," Rei replied.
'That hurt...' "Shove it, Rei...What were we talking about guys?" I asked, noticing the hurt look on Rei's face.
'Er... ooh, I didn't mean to hurt her... Ugh.. I'm such a blonde.'
"We were talking about who's better. Spider-Man or Superman," Makoto answered polietly.
I stared at them in disbelief. They interrupted my thoughts to know who I thought was better? Ohy, couldn't they
think of something better to talk about? Like, whom Minako had a crush on now or if Rei had someone else in her life now.
I mean, come on. Give me something that is worth arguing about or something. This was pathetic.
"I personally think they both suck. Venom was pretty cool for a villian though," I replied, smirking.
"Oh you've got to be kidding! The green dude from Spider-Man was a way better villian!" Minako argued.
"No way! I think..."
I started not paying attention again. This was hopeless. Not to mention extremely boring. Mind-numbingly boring.
'Is that even a word?' I thought. I shook my head and stood up. I needed some fresh air or something. I walked out onto
Makoto's balcony and leaned against the railing. I listened to the laughter inside and I felt a familiar pain in my heart.
I remembered the way Rei use to make me laugh like that. I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I wiped it away. 'This isn't
the time for this Usagi. Get ahold of yourself.' I felt someone walk up next to me and I turned my head to see who it was.
"Oh.. hey Rei."
"Evening..."
I don't know what to say
I think I know why you look this way
This was torture. She was so close and I couldn't do anything about it. I wanted to just kiss her, make the pain
go away, but I knew it was because of me that she was in pain to begin with. I turned back and looked up at the moon. I
smiled, remembering the night she said she loved me. She was so nervous. I noticed that she fidgited next to me, so I moved
down a bit, giving her some room. I thought I heard her sigh, but I shook it off. She was about to turn and leave, so I
started talking to her again.
"Pretty out, isn't it?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah it is."
She turned back, and leaned against the railing next to me. Okay, that was good.
"So... uhm... how have you been doing?"
"As good as can be expected. You?"
'Miserable...' "Alright, I suppose. Uhm.. how's... life?"
"Sucks, but hey. What else is new? It...nevermind."
'Okay, I'm getting somewhere.' "Sucks? How c- oh.. Uhm.. You know I'm sorry about that, right?"
She looked at me and I could see the hurt in her eyes. Did I really cause that much pain. I mean, really, she looked
like her world crashed down before her eyes. I turned away from her gaze, on the verge of letting down my barrier. I wanted
to take that pain from her. Make it mine, but I knew I couldn't. I never would be able to take back what I said. I just...
I wanted one more chance. Just one more. That's all I would need to prove that I loved her. I opened my mouth to say something,
but she beat me to it. Bringing down my world as well.
"You killed me that night Usagi. Do you know how much it hurts seeing you right now? Do you?! Why the hell did you
do that to me Usagi? Why?"
I could hear her voice cracking as she said those words. I felt my heart shatter after she said that. I couldn't
answer her though. I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do at the time. I honestly regretted it after I said
the words.
"Let me guess, Odango. You can't think of a good reason for leaving me, can you?"
"I don't know why I left you, alright?!"
"Sure, whatever."
"Rei, this isn't fair! I regret what I said... I do. If I could go back in time, stop myself from saying them. I would.
But I can't! And I'm sorry... Kami, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, right. Kami, Usagi. You tore my heart apart... You took awa-"
'That's it! I can't take this anymore!' I grabbed her shoulders and kissed her fiercely. She was shocked at first, which
was normal. I noticed she stiffened slightly before finally giving into the kiss, wrapping her arms around my waist. It felt so
right. So.. perfect. I loosely wrapped my arms on her shoulders, deepening the kiss. I felt like I was in heaven. I didn't want it
to end, in fear of what might follow. I didn't want my heart broken again. It hurt enough right now, I wouldn't be able to handle anymore.
She pulled away from, flushed and out of breath. I smiled slightly, barely noticable. She looked into my eyes and I noticed... love?
Maybe it was lust. I couldn't tell.
"Is this real Usagi? Oh, tell me this isn't a dream. Kami, I can't take another dream..."
'She dreams about me..?' "No, it's not Rei."
She smiled and laid her forehead against mine. I ran my fingers over her cheeks and promised myself I wouldn't hurt her
ever again. I wouldn't be able to bare it if I did.
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shouldn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
Rei and I walked along, hand-and-hand through the park. It's been about three months since that night on Makoto's balcony.
I made sure not to hurt her anymore than I already had. The pain I went through was unbearable and I couldn't begin to imagine how
Rei felt. I hated myself for saying those words to her. But, that was past us now. I'm happy now, so is she. I glanced up at her and
she looked a little.. pre-occupied. Frowning, I asked her what was on her mind, only to be greeted by silence. I tapped her shoulder
and she looked startled at first, then turned to face me, smiling slightly.
"Nani?"
"What's on you mind?" I repeated.
"Hm? Oh, nothing."
"Are you sure? Cause you look pre-occupied..."
"I'm sure Odango... don't worry."
She leaned down and kissed me softly to re-assure me that everything was fine. I wanted to believe her, but for some reason,
I couldn't. Something inside me told me that things weren't alright. I pulled back slightly, noting that she realized I didn't believe
her. I looked at the ground, leaning into her. For some reason, I didn't think I'd be able to hear what she had to say. I started hearing
a little voice in the back of my head, telling me things were wrong. That it wouldn't work out for us. I didn't want to believe it, but
this nagging feeling in my gut told me to believe other-wise.
"Odango... don't you believe me?"
"I.. I want to.. but..."
"Usagi, please listen to me. Nothing is wrong. I promise..."
I looked up at her, into her eyes, and they told me different. I forced a smile and nodded. Why was she lying to me? Didn't she
think I could handle it? We continued to walk along, as I stared at the ground the entire time. I hated the feeling of betrayal, the feeling
that I was going to be hurt again. I couldn't shake the feeling either. She wrapped her arm around my waist, holding my close and I shoved
all of my doubts and fears into the back of my mind. They could wait til tomorrow. I was happy right now. And that's all that mattered at the
moment. We stopped by some trees and a small lake. She led me over to a rather large tree, sitting down and leaning against the trunk. I sat
beside her, laying my head on her shoulder. She wrapped one arm around my shoulder, gently stroking my hair.
"Aishiteru, Odango."
I smiled and replied, "Aishiteru, Rei."
I leaned up and kissed her cheek softly. She smiled and we just sat there, watching the lake as the sun slowly began to set. We must
have sat there for hours watching the lake. It was begining to get chilly and I was begining to fall asleep. Rei must have noticed because
she shook my shoulder lightly and asked if I was ready to leave. Nodding, we stood up and slowly walked in the direction of my house. I didn't
want the night to end, but I knew I had to get home before my dad flipped out. When we reached my house, I turned to her and again she looked
like she was in a totally different world. She looked into my eyes and smiled, then leaned down and kissed me softly.
"Goodnight, tenshi," she said softly.
"Goodnight, koi. Aishiteru..." I replied before turning and entering my house.
I shut the door and leaned against it, sighing deeply, not knowing Rei had done the same thing on the other side. I didn't want to realize
that my heart was going to get broken, but I knew it was. I slowly climbed the stairs to my bedroom and flopped down onto my bed. I began to run
through the many things that could be wrong, all of them pointing to her not loving me anymore. I didn't want to believe it, but the images of her
face tonight kept appearing in my mind. She seemed so happy just a couple of nights ago, I wonder what happened between then and now. 'Maybe I should
ask her tomorrow or something... but then she might think I don't love her...' I sighed, curling up into a ball on my side. I felt the tears stinging
my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Luna had jumped onto my bed, scaring me a bit.
"What's wrong Usagi? You look like your about to cry," she asked, curling up next to me.
"Nothing Luna..."
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
I sat on my bed, hugging my pillow tight, crying silently. A week ago, my koi had broken my heart by telling me she didn't love me anymore. I
couldn't believe it. Just like that she told me. I ran from her, crying. I had wanted her so badly and now, I'd never be with her again. The pain was
unbearable. I had no one to turn to, no one to comfort me. Atleast, not there with me anyway. I got up and walked outside, just letting myself walk around.
Needless to say, I ended up infront of her house. I looked up the steps, seeing that she was outside sweeping. It killed me to see that she wasn't the least
bit upset. I rushed away from there, not wanting to see her any longer. I walked around more and ended up at someone else's house. The person's house
surprised me but I walked up the door and knocked anyway. When they answered, they looked surprised to see me, but invited me in anyway.
"What brings you here, if I may ask?"
"I.. I don't know. Comfort, I guess... I need someone to talk to..."
She nodded and smiled, leading me to the couch. We sat down and I began to talk, telling her everything and anything that came to mind. She just sat
and listened to me, which is was I needed the most. Then, I began crying and she took me into her arms, rocking back and forth slightly, trying to calm me down.
The sobs made my body shake, the tears streamed down my cheeks. I buried my face into her shoulder, not caring that I was soaking her shirt. Apparently, she didn't
care either. When my crying finally ended, I pulled away, blushing from embarrasement. She assured me that it was alright, but I apologized anyway. She smiled and
glanced at the ground.
"What's wrong?"
"Oh.. it's just that.. You deserve better than that Usagi. Honestly, you shouldn't have to deal with the pain."
Shocked, I listened. Was she trying to tell me something? She glanced up at me and uttered those words that would change my life forever.
"Usagi... I.. Well, I love you."
I blushed, looking at the ground. Why did I feel like this was right? I couldn't be in love with her... could I? She profusely apologized for the comment,
and I could hear that hurt in her voice. I looked up at her, shaking my head slightly as to say that it was alright. I started to lean in, slowly. When my lips meet
hers, I let my eyes fall shut and gave into my feelings. Maybe I really loved her, maybe I was on the rebound. All I knew at the moment was how right the whole thing
felt at the moment. When he finally gave into the kiss, I moved in closer, wrapping my arms around her waist as she wrapped hers around my waist. When we broke the
kiss, we were both flushed and slightly out of breath.
"This... is this..."
"I-I don't know... but lets not think about that now..."
She smiled at me and nodded. Rei may have broken my heart, but I didn't care right now. All that mattered right now was this very moment. Maybe I wasn't meant
to be with Rei, or the person next to me, but I know now that I'll only find out by trying. I kissed her once more softly before resting my head on her shoulder. I
wasn't going to let anything ruin this moment, nor was anyone going to kill my spirits. Right now, I was happy. Content. I felt safe and I wanted to stay here, with her,
til all the pain was gone. I knew that might take a while, but it didn't bother me. I felt like I had found someone who wasn't going to break my heart and I wasn't about
to trade that for the world.
"I.. I think I love you too..."
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shoudn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I shoudn't have acted that way
I miss you tonight
I made up my mind
I got scared
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Like? Don't like? Care to guess at whom she fell in love with at the end? Haven't a clue...? Wanna find out? Heh... Review... Though,
I probably won't tell you who the person is.. *smirks* Anyways... if enough people ask, I'll do a another one, continuing where this
one left off.. and then you will find out who the person is.. Mwuhahaha.. ^^
