For Me

By A.M. Glass

Copyright: June 10th, 2000

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy, The Vampire Slayer", well, they don't belong to me, they belong to Joss Whedon, et al. No copyright infringement is intended or inferred. This a non-profit piece of fan fiction, the story is the sole property of the author.

SPOILERS: "Wild At Heart", "Superstar" and "Something Blue"

Author's Note: I have no idea where this story came from. It was just a small thought that kept prodding at me, until I had to write it down. Oh... btw, this is a ONE-SHOT story. I just thought I'd let you know up front.

Angst Warning: I'm not really sure how much there is in here. But I wouldn't be surprised to find a fair amount in here.


"Don't leave, please."

"I... I have to."

"Why?"

"I can't love you, not the way you want me too. I'm sorry."

Willow reached the door and turned around, watching how Tara's body shook with sobs. Her infamous resolve almost gaving way to the scene playing before her eyes. She had to leave, there was no other way.

Not now.

Opening the door, and picking up her bag, she started to walk out when she heard Tara's voice behind her.

"I love you. You can't change that. You... you can leave me... but you'll never leave my heart."

Taking a deep breath, Willow stepped through the door and closed it. Closing off her heart.


"Hey Buff, what with Will?" Xander asked as he and Buffy were walking slightly behind her.

"I'm not sure. She's been like this for a week and she hasn't said anything."

"This isn't like her," he paused, then added, "Well maybe it is."

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked.

"You remember how she was... when Oz."

Buffy grabbed Xander by the arm spinning him towards her.

"WHOA! I thought I was on an E-ticket ride," he said.

"Xander... you don't think, you know. That she and Tara?"

"Broke up? Nah, we would have seen something."

"Xander, we didn't see anything with Oz. Willow thought something was going on, but that's all. At least until she found him with that girl," Buffy explained, dragging Xander forward to catch up with Willow who had gotten ahead of them.

"You don't actually think that Tara...? You know," Xander asked.

"I don't know. But one thing's for sure, I'm going to ask her. I don't want to end up with Spike again," Buffy said, shivering at the memory.

"Yeah, I think I can deal without being a demon-magnet. Unless its Anya of course."

Buffy and Xander walked in silence, each contemplating what could have their friend in such a funk.


"Um... hi Buffy," Tara said after opening the door and seeing the Slayer standing in her doorway. "If... if you're looking for Will. She... she's not here."

"I'm not looking for Will, Tara."

"No?" she asked confused.

"No... can I come in?"

Tara stepped out of the way, letting Buffy inside her room. This was only the second time that Willow's friend had been in her dorm room, she wished the first time hadn't happened the way it did.

"Tara, what's going on with you and Will?"

"Ex... excuse me?" Tara said.

A knock on the door stopped Buffy from asking again. She watched as Tara went and opened the door.

"Oh, hi Natalie," Tara said smiling.

"Hi Tara. I thought we could..." she paused when she saw Buffy inside the room. "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were alone," Natalie said. "Hi."

Buffy simply nodded her head.

"I could come back later. You seem busy," Natalie said.

"That's okay. I'm leaving," Buffy said, brushing past the other girl.

"Buff... Buffy," Tara called out.

"I thought I could trust you," Buffy told Tara before leaving.

"What was that about?" Natalie asked as she entered Tara's room.

"I have no idea," she answered, a brief frown covering her features as she shrugged her shoulders.

"Well, should we...?"

"Oh, yes," Tara replied closing the door behind her, not seeing Buffy down the hall. Or the hatred on her face. Buffy left the building and headed to Xander's wondering how he was doing.


"Hello?" Willow asked as she spoke into the telephone.

"Hey Will."

"Hi Xander. How are you?"

"I'm fine. Say, Will, I haven't Tara in a while. Is she okay?" Xander asked, getting straight to the point.

"She... she's fine."

Xander heard the hesitation in Willow's voice and cringed. "I've got an idea, why don't we met up with Buffy and head on over to the Bronze? Whaddaya say? We haven't gone out in a while."

"Umm... I'm... I'm not sure Tara can make it. She's... she's busy," Willow answered.

"Are you sure? Come on, if anyone can get her to go, it's you," Xander prodded.

"I'll... I'll ask her, but I can't promise that she can make it. I've got to get going now Xander. I'll call you later, okay?"

"Sure Will. I'll get in touch with Buffy, talk to you later," he said as he hung up. "Oh man," he sighed.


"Then what happened?" Xander asked Buffy after he had filled her in on the conversation he and Willow had had.

"I stuck around for another minute or so before heading here. I can't believe Tara would do this," Buffy said, pacing back and forth in the basement.

"Do you think this 'Natalie' had something to do with it?"

"I'm not sure. But... I just can't picture this happening you know. Will... Will's so..."

"In love with her. I know," Xander supplied.

"Maybe we can do something..."

"Like what? Try to get them back together?"

"We can't just sit back and do nothing," Buffy said as she flopped down on couch.

"Maybe we should just ask Will?" Xander suggested.

"I'm not sure that would get us anywhere. It took her long enough to tell us about Tara. She might not want to admit anything's wrong, you know."

"You've got a point."

"I won't let her hurt Will," Buffy stated.

Xander reached out and grabbed Buffy's hand, squeezing it. "I won't either," he promised.


Xander and Buffy were about to enter the dorm room she and Willow shared when they heard voices from the other side of the door.

"So, this is it then?" they heard Tara ask.

"Yes. Besides, I can see that you didn't waste anytime," they heard Willow reply.

"You're... you're the one who broke up with me, not the other way around."

Buffy and Xander looked at each other, both wearing shocked expressions on their faces.

"So... so how long did you wait? An hour? Less?" Willow's anguished voice asked.

"Let's get out of here. I don't know why we even came here."

Xander looked at Buffy and mouthed, Who is that?

Buffy shrugged, Natalie?

Oh, he replied silently nodding his head.

"Yeah, why don't you leave with your..."

"Don't say another word."

"Why not? What are you going to do?"

Buffy pushed the door open when she heard the slap, knocking the other girl out of the way, going straight for Tara.

"Buffy!"

Buffy didn't acknowledge Willow's cry. She grabbed Tara and pushed her up against the wall, her forearm underneath Tara's neck.

"Give me a reason... please," she whispered, pushing into Tara's throat.

"Buffy, what are you doing!?!" Willow shouted, trying to get to her room mate. "Xander, let go!!!"

"It's okay Will. She won't hurt you again," he said, holding her back.

"What are you talking about?" Willow asked, pushing against Xander. "Buffy... please, she can't breathe!" Willow cried out when she noticed that Tara coloring had changed, going from red, to blue.

Tara couldn't believe this was happening. She was going to die. She looked from Buffy over to Willow, using the last of her strength, she gasped out the words she wanted Willow to hear. "I love you," then her eyes rolled back as she passed out.

"TARA!!"

"OW" Xander cried out, when Willow stomped on his foot, pushing away from him. She ran over to Buffy, trying to pull her off Tara's slumped body.

"What's going on?"

"You should know. You broke them up..." Xander said, grimacing in pain, to the girl Buffy had knocked out of the way to get to Tara.

"BUFFY... let her go!!!"

"Oh my god, what is she doing?" she asked as she finally took in what was happening.

"Oh, no. You're staying here," Xander said, grabbing her as she was about to assist Willow.

"Please... Buffy... please..." Willow cried out, tears streaming down her face.

"She hit you Will," Buffy said.

"She didn't..."

"We heard it Will."

"Yeah, we heard everything," Xander added.

"Oh my god... oh, no. Buffy... let Tara go... please... we were practicing... you're going to kill her... please," Willow pleaded.

"Practicing?" Xander asked, getting a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, as he released his hold.

"Tara and Willow were helping me with my project for my drama class. I had to write a two act play... that's what you heard."

"A play?" Buffy asked, as she stepped away from Tara's body, as it slid to the floor. "Oh, my god. What have I done?" she whispered.

"Tara? Tara... answer me... please... don't leave me... I love you... plea... please," Willow hiccuped as her emotions threatened to close her throat, as she gathered Tara's body towards her, rocking back and forth.

"I asked them to get into the parts they were playing..." Natalie said looking at Xander, then to Buffy. "I knew if they kept seeing each other no one would believe them when they did the roles later. They care too much about each other to pull it off."

"So... they had to pretend they were breaking up?" Xander asked.

"She didn't want to do it. She didn't want to be apart from me," Willow said, looking at Buffy, "She did it for me, 'cause I asked her to." She looked back towards Tara. "Didn't you baby," she whispered.

"We got to get her to the hospital," Buffy said as she started to move in Willow's direction.

"Don't you take another step," she said, without turning away from Tara's face. "You've both done enough. I don't want to see you again," Willow told them, as Tara's eyes started to flutter.

"Bu... but Will," Xander said, silently praying that they could... 'What Harris? Why would Willow want to be even in the same room with you right now, let alone talk to you,' he thought to himself.

"Get out. Now," she said quietly.

"Will..."

"I said... now, " she repeated, her voice devoid of emotion.

"I think you should both leave. I'll help with Tara," Natalie told them as she went to Willow side. "Come on Willow," she said as they moved Tara and placed her gently on the bed. It was the last Buffy and Xander were able to see before Natalie had walked over and closed the door on them.


"Have you heard anything?" Buffy asked Xander as they once again met in his basement.

"Not much. She called last week to tell me that except for a headache and sore throat..."

"Tara's okay."

"Yeah."

"Xander, what am I going to do? I can't lose Willow. I can't."

"We messed up big time on this. We both did. It's up to her."


"When are you going to talk to Buffy?" Tara asked as she lay down on her bed.

"Tara, she tried to kill you," Willow said, as if that would explain everything.

"But she didn't.

"Tara... how can you be so.... I don't know. Calm about this? Buffy almost killed you," she said, moving over to the bed and sitting down next to her. Willow reached out and took her hand, holding on to it for dear life. She had noticed, as Tara had mentioned, that she had become more physical. She would hold on to Tara longer when they embraced, would need to touch her, just to make sure she was actually with her.

Tara pulled Willow into her arms, feeling her love's heart racing against her chest.

"Will... Buffy and Xander thought they were protecting you. They thought I'd hit you," she said shivering at the memory of Buffy's absolute hatred of her at that moment when she burst through the door.

"She had no right... none."

"That's not true and you know it. They've known you longer than I have. They've loved you longer. And I think... no, I know, I would probably do the same thing..."

"You couldn't do that Tara. Not you."

Tara kissed Willow on the forehead. "I would."

"How can you say that?"

"Easy. I love you. Love makes you do things you'd never see yourself doing before."

Willow thought about what Tara had said, and saw the truth.

"So, are you going to call her?" Tara asked.


"Hello? Oh... yeah, she's here, hold on," Xander said as he handed the telephone to Buffy.

"Hello?"

"We need to talk," Willow said into the receiver, while Tara held her hand.

The End.