The Most Ominous Threat: Osama bin Laden
Chapter Three: Into the Realm
You mindless people are really pathetic...
Defending that thing called peace...
It is just but a shadow of death...
That dies with the ones who are advocating it.
***
Tifa, being the leader of Cloud's team in his absence, brought her friends and Bugenhagen
to the Forgotten Capital; desparately finding a way to revive Aeris and warp to Earth.
"Ho Ho Hooo. It's the second time I have visited this place," said Bugenhagen.
"And it's my second time to be the leader. But I feel something bad will happen," Tifa
worried.
"Wha'?" Barret asked.
"We won't find the revival item nor the portal. Considering that we don't understand
all of the Ancients' inscriptions."
"Ho Ho Hooo. There is one last resort to this problem," Bugenhagen interrupted. "Only one
person will transcript the Ancients' writings for us. He is... I. M. Weasel."
"I. M. Weasel?! That genius weasel with a dumb baboon sidekick? Holy $^&*!" Cid exclaimed.
The others are awed. Then they keep silent as Bugenhagen chants something that will
summon the weasel and the baboon into their world.
And as expected, I. M. Weasel and I. R. Baboon appeared in the flesh in front of Bugenhagen
and company.
"Hmmm... where are we, my reliable pal?" Weasel asked Baboon.
"Ahhh... I think I are in another world. And I are do no know those people," Baboon
answered.
Bugenhagen approaches Weasel and Baboon. "Ho Ho Hooo. You must be I. M. Weasel and I. R.
Baboon."
Weasel replied, "And you are Santa Claus?"
"No. I am Bugenhagen. Behind me are the people who want to go to the planet called Earth."
"Earth? It's me and Baboon's planet!"
"Well. Here are they. Ho Ho Hooo."
While Baboon toys around the Forgotten Capital, the first batch of heroes introduce
themselves. (Note: The intoduction part is boring since by the time you read this, you're
an FF fan. So I'll skip it. --Author)
And when Tifa introduced herself, Baboon turned around to see her.
"Ahhh... I are fascinated. That girl... I are gonna marry her..."
He's really fascinated. He drools all over while hearing her angelic voice and seeing
her attractive body. Then he performs his trademark dance around the area while shouting,
"I are marry her! I are marry her!"
"Hey, Baboon! Why are you drooling all over?" Weasel pondered.
"Weasel, I think he's going bananas over Tifa," Red XIII answered.
"Baboon! Stop fantasizing about Miss Lockheart!" Weasel shouted while pulling Baboon out
of Tifa's sight.
"And anyway, Mr. Bugenhagen, why have you summoned us?" Weasel asked.
"Ho Ho Hooo. We summoned you so that you can read the inscriptions over there (pointing
at the center of the shrine) for us and eventually revive a dead woman and warp us to
your world."
"Who is this woman?"
"Aeris Gainsborough. The last of a race called the Cetra or the Ancients."
"Well done. Please wait while I put away Baboon from the girls' sight and then we can start
with the inspection."
The whole team inspected the inscriptions (with Baboon now locked in a steel cage) when
Cloud suddenly arrived.
"Cloud, why are you, like, here?" Yuffie asked.
"The seminar has been postponed to give way to an autograph signing with The Rock," Cloud
answered. "I'm not a big fan of wrestling, so I left Kalm, called a taxi and went here."
"Ho Ho Hooo. Thank God you arrived, Cloud. You see, I brought two persons from a planet
called Earth to inspect the inscriptions and find a way to... you know," Bugenhagen told
Cloud.
"Who are they?"
"On my left is I. M. Weasel and on the cage over there is I. R. Baboon. Mr. Weasel caught
Mr. Baboon because of fantasizing over Tifa."
Cloud then approached the two persons and introduced himself. After that, he looked closely
at what Weasel is doing.
"Hmmm... This is really the most exquisite script I've ever seen in my entire life...
Anyway, the inscriptions say that we need an item called the Mega Phoenix to revive Aeris.
And for the portal, we need a confidential Shinra document and the three rarest materia
in this world to open it," Weasel said.
"No problemo, I. M.! I'm a Shinra employee and I can fax a document for you," added Cait
Sith.
"Yeah, but watch out fo' you' consequences of you' actions, you damn cat," Barret interrup-
ted.
"But how about the Mega Phoenix and the three materia? I don't think we can have them,"
Vincent worried.
"The three materia? They are, like, in my, like, house," Yuffie said.
"We don't have time left. We must get going," Cloud commanded.
Then the team goes to work. The boys search the area for the Mega Phoenix, Cait Sith calls
the Shinra HQ for a confidential document to be faxed, and the girls go to Wutai to get
the rare materia apparently hidden in Yuffie's house: Knights of the Round, Quadra Magic,
and Mime.
After two and a half hours...
"Very good, my brave-hearted friends! You have found the necessary ingredients! All we
have to do now is to revive Aeris. Cloud, will you do the honors?" stated Weasel.
"Of course."
The whole team then goes to the body of water where Aeris is buried. Baboon, as always,
is left behind in the cage, wondering what will happen next.
Cloud, clutching the Mega Phoenix, walks to the exact spot where Aeris is buried. He then
hurls the thing into the air and shouts, "Master of rebirth, breathe new life into the
body of a girl who never had the joys of a woman! Ultra-Life!"
A shining column of light then appears from the sky and immediately penetrates the crystal
blue water. Moments later, a holographic image of Aeris appears in the spot where the light
penetrated. It suddenly walks over the water, coming closer to Cloud and co. And as the
image's feet touched the ground, it transformed into the new, improved, revitalized (man,
looks like I'm advertising a product... --Author) Aeris.
Cloud is struck with awe as he sees Aeris in the flesh. He hastily runs towards her and
then embraces her. The two tightly hug each other and shed tears of joy afterwards.
"Aeris, you're back! I missed you so much."
"Cloud, I missed you too."
"Now that Sephiroth and Jenova are gone for good, let us share our brand-new moments
together."
"Yeah. I'm glad to hear the news. And after that fiasco, do you still love me?"
"Certainly." (Note: I'm showing no prejudice towards the advocates of the Cloud-Tifa
loveteam. Period. --Author)
"Oh, that's good to hear. But, how did you revive me?"
"I used a rare revival item on you. And I did it on purpose."
"What purpose?"
"We've gotta stop a terrorist from wreaking havoc on a planet called Earth."
"Another villain? And what's the reward?"
"I'll marry you."
"Oh, thank you."
Cloud and Aeris then close their eyes and position their lips, ready to kiss. Their lips
draw closer and closer until Weasel shouted, "Mister Strife! Miss Gainsborough! The portal
is open! We must hurry! There's no time to lose!"
"We'll save our kiss for later," Cloud said to Aeris. "After all, those terrorists that
we'll face are extremely conservative. PDA's are eyesores for them."
He then turns around and said, "Excuse me, Weasel. How will you release Baboon from the
cage?"
"I will tell him that he must not fantasize the girls. They are beautiful, but they can
kick butt too."
The whole group then rushes to the portal and are sucked inside. The portal then vanishes.
Who knows where on Earth will they land?
***
Squall and co. currently hold a meeting with the headmaster of Balamb Garden.
"Squall, what is the purpose of leaving this world, you say?" asked Cid.
"Sir, we must eliminate a terrorist on a planet called Earth," Squall replied.
"Well, this mission will be the same as in Dollet, but the problem is the method
of teleportation."
"Esthar is good at advanced technology like that, sir. We can meet Dr. Odine right away."
"Good. Now pilot the Ragnarok. And don't forget to invite Laguna, Kiros, and Ward. That
will make a total of nine personnel for this mission. Meeting dismissed."
And as Squall and co. leave the headmaster's office, his buddies have mixed thoughts
on the forthcoming mission.
"Yeah! Time to kick the terrorist's ass," Zell said enthusiastically.
"But I feel something bad," Rinoa worried. "I might turn into a scorceress again when I
meet the doctor."
"Don't worry, Rinoa," Squall replied. "Ultimecia's gone, so you'll be fine."
Irvine startles the group with his question: "Will our enemies be as tough as those
Galbadian soldiers?"
"Man, it's so hard to answer," Selphie stated.
"It's because we don't have any info on the terrorists on Earth yet," Quistis added.
The group then boards the Ragnarok and flies off to Esthar.
They plan to meet Dr. Odine first, then they will escort him to Pres. Loire.
As they journey through the streets of Esthar, they see no signs of monsters. The reason
is that there will be no unexpected Lunar Cries because the Lunatic Pandora is now
inactive.
They arrive at last at Dr. Odine's lab. His assistant recognizes and greets them. After-
wards he takes them to the doctor himself.
"Oh, how nice of you to come," Dr. Odine salutated them. "Vell, vhat service can I offer
you?"
"Doctor, we badly need a teleportation device to go to a planet called Earth," Squall
answered. "We have a mission to eliminate the terrorists there."
"Very good. I have built a teleportation device right before I conducted ze research
on ze sorceress. Vait a minute. I vill be back vid ze device."
Squall and co. stand still while waiting for the device. While doing so, the brains of
the mission pondered, "I think the answer to Irvine's question earlier is... the terrorists
are tougher. They use all merciless methods to sow terror everywhere. It's in the name."
Dr. Odine arrives at the place where the group waited, carrying a huge oval mirror with
electronic thingies attached to its frame.
"Vhew, zis iz so heavy," Odine said. "But anyway, one push of ze button and voila! You're
transported."
"Thanks, doc. But we won't warp to Earth unless we join Laguna and co. with us," Squall
stated.
"Oh man. But I know zat it iz required by ze headmaster of your Garden, right?"
"Right. Now please take me to Laguna."
Squall, his friends, and Odine (with the device) then drives to the Presidential Palace.
There they are welcomed by the palace staff until they go to the office of the President.
"Good to see you again, Squall," Laguna greeted. "And Doc, how's life?"
"Vell, Mr. President, Squall and company vant to join you, Kiros, and Ward into zeir
mission on a planet called Earth to eliminate ze terrorists zere," Odine replied.
"Here iz ze teleportation device to be used."
"Well, I'm engaging into combat again. Guess it's time to become soldiers again, right,
Kiros, Ward?" Laguna asked.
"After all, we helped them in their dreams," Kiros answered. "And it's good to pay back
the kindness we gave them."
Ward, still mute, gives a smile of approval.
"We don't have time left! Irvine, activate the portal and let's go!" Quistis commanded.
"Yeah, I'm itchin' to kick ass," Zell responded.
Irvine immediately presses the button on the device. A portal appears. Squall, Laguna, and
the rest of the gang leaped into the portal. Moments later it disappeared.
"Have a safe journey, people," Odine said. "Hmmm... Vill I be ze temporary president for
now?"
***
Zidane and company (with Cid's assistants) are now busy in building the new airship.
With their strong work ethic that they learned after defeating Kuja and Necron, they finish
it in just two days.
"Whew, it's like we're building Noah's Ark," Zidane tiringly said.
"But at least we are done already," Regent Cid replied. "Now the whole team is complete."
"Wait a second. Vivi disappeared, and in his place his sons appear right here. How do we
handle this?" Steiner interrogated.
"Let us name the eldest son Vivi Orunitia, Jr. Then his next-in-line brothers will be named
Vivi III, Vivi IV, etc., etc."
"What a dumb naming proposal it is! It will breed confusion," Freya complained.
"But at least we are invloving Vivi in the fight against the terrorists. So there."
Zidane and company then boards the Invincible II. Cid and his assistants await outside
at the dock.
What does the new airship look like? The airship's design duplicates the original, but it
has airplane engine-like devices that activate a large portal.
"Start main engine!" Cid commanded.
The main engine roars in full glory.
"Activate portal controls!"
A large portal appears in Lindblum, about as huge as the eidolon Atomos when it attacked
the city proper.
"Sail for main destination: Earth!"
The Invincible II then moves towards the portal. The latter sucks the former like a vacuum
cleaner.
"May you have a safe trip! And bring me some souvenirs, too!"
One of Cid's assistants reacted, "Hey! Those terrorists carry deadly weapons from the
future. What will you do, use them to conquer other kingdoms?"
"Whoops. Those terrorists are really not gift givers."
***
Tidus and his buddies wander around Spira to find a person who would warp them into Earth.
They are nearly exhausted until a band of Al Bhed bandits (apparently the friends of those
who kidnapped Yuna) meet them.
The bandit leader said in the Al Bhed language, "Hey you guys! Surrender everything you
have, or else we'll kill you!"
Rikku heard the message and translated it for the rest of the group.
Wakka yelled, "We won't give all our stuff to you! In fact, we defeated the curse of Yevon!
So beat it, you knuckleheads!"
Rikku said Wakka's message in Al Bhed.
The leader reacted. "Well, let's see 'bout that," he said in Al Bhed, then kicked Kimahri's
shin.
"OOOWWWW! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" Kimahri shouted. His fury then bursts and pummels the
bandits mercilessly. A thick cloud appears, covering much of the action.
Kimahri soon grows tired of beating them, and the cloud disappears. And do you know who
are those bandits? They're really the Backstreet Boys!
"Enough of fighting," Nick Carter said. "We pretended as Al Bhed bandits so that we will
defeat our rivals N'Sync, who reportedly joined a blitzball team."
Tidus asked, "Abes or Aurochs?"
A.J. McLean answered, "I think it's Abes."
"What? This is so controversial!" Tidus exclaimed.
"Ha ha! Those guys don't know blitzball!" Wakka teased Tidus. "Now my team will win at
last!"
"Shut up," Tidus reacted.
"Hey, if you wanna join us, then go to Zanarkand Stadium," Brian Littrell explained.
"It's Abes vs. Aurochs there."
Tidus and Wakka face off and you can feel sparks between their eyes.
"Hey, you two, stop staring like that and get going!" the two remaining members, Kevin
Richardson and Howie Dorough, yelled.
Tidus, his buddies, and the Backstreet Boys then mosey on to the stadium. They can feel
the capacity crowd upon entering the stadium.
The big game is sure to have some big rivalry. Tidus vs. Wakka. Backstreet Boys vs. N'Sync.
And that game starts. You can really feel the heat of the blitzball action underwater.
(Note: I really didn't play FF10, so I don't know much about blitzball. Sorry, guys.
--Author)
Later, Tidus and Wakka have been assigned as the passers for each team. Before the start
of the next period, they rattled and rambled and taunted each other.
And then the inevitable happens. A dummy of a Sinspawn (operated by none other than
Mariah Carey... hehehe) appears in the water, facing Tidus and Wakka. The dummy casts
a fake version of Gravija on the two, sucking them into the black globe.
Now the black globe created by the fake Gravija grows bigger and bigger and eventually
covers the playfield. Yuna and the others are wondering and worrying where Tidus and
Wakka are. They believe that the black globe sucked Tidus and Wakka, so they leap in there.
And you know... That black globe is really a portal to Earth. Any questions?
***
Brave heroes...
Gather round in the mountainous regoins of a country called Afghanistan...
Here you will fight those meddling terrorists.
Good luck on your bout!
(end of chapter)
Chapter Three: Into the Realm
You mindless people are really pathetic...
Defending that thing called peace...
It is just but a shadow of death...
That dies with the ones who are advocating it.
***
Tifa, being the leader of Cloud's team in his absence, brought her friends and Bugenhagen
to the Forgotten Capital; desparately finding a way to revive Aeris and warp to Earth.
"Ho Ho Hooo. It's the second time I have visited this place," said Bugenhagen.
"And it's my second time to be the leader. But I feel something bad will happen," Tifa
worried.
"Wha'?" Barret asked.
"We won't find the revival item nor the portal. Considering that we don't understand
all of the Ancients' inscriptions."
"Ho Ho Hooo. There is one last resort to this problem," Bugenhagen interrupted. "Only one
person will transcript the Ancients' writings for us. He is... I. M. Weasel."
"I. M. Weasel?! That genius weasel with a dumb baboon sidekick? Holy $^&*!" Cid exclaimed.
The others are awed. Then they keep silent as Bugenhagen chants something that will
summon the weasel and the baboon into their world.
And as expected, I. M. Weasel and I. R. Baboon appeared in the flesh in front of Bugenhagen
and company.
"Hmmm... where are we, my reliable pal?" Weasel asked Baboon.
"Ahhh... I think I are in another world. And I are do no know those people," Baboon
answered.
Bugenhagen approaches Weasel and Baboon. "Ho Ho Hooo. You must be I. M. Weasel and I. R.
Baboon."
Weasel replied, "And you are Santa Claus?"
"No. I am Bugenhagen. Behind me are the people who want to go to the planet called Earth."
"Earth? It's me and Baboon's planet!"
"Well. Here are they. Ho Ho Hooo."
While Baboon toys around the Forgotten Capital, the first batch of heroes introduce
themselves. (Note: The intoduction part is boring since by the time you read this, you're
an FF fan. So I'll skip it. --Author)
And when Tifa introduced herself, Baboon turned around to see her.
"Ahhh... I are fascinated. That girl... I are gonna marry her..."
He's really fascinated. He drools all over while hearing her angelic voice and seeing
her attractive body. Then he performs his trademark dance around the area while shouting,
"I are marry her! I are marry her!"
"Hey, Baboon! Why are you drooling all over?" Weasel pondered.
"Weasel, I think he's going bananas over Tifa," Red XIII answered.
"Baboon! Stop fantasizing about Miss Lockheart!" Weasel shouted while pulling Baboon out
of Tifa's sight.
"And anyway, Mr. Bugenhagen, why have you summoned us?" Weasel asked.
"Ho Ho Hooo. We summoned you so that you can read the inscriptions over there (pointing
at the center of the shrine) for us and eventually revive a dead woman and warp us to
your world."
"Who is this woman?"
"Aeris Gainsborough. The last of a race called the Cetra or the Ancients."
"Well done. Please wait while I put away Baboon from the girls' sight and then we can start
with the inspection."
The whole team inspected the inscriptions (with Baboon now locked in a steel cage) when
Cloud suddenly arrived.
"Cloud, why are you, like, here?" Yuffie asked.
"The seminar has been postponed to give way to an autograph signing with The Rock," Cloud
answered. "I'm not a big fan of wrestling, so I left Kalm, called a taxi and went here."
"Ho Ho Hooo. Thank God you arrived, Cloud. You see, I brought two persons from a planet
called Earth to inspect the inscriptions and find a way to... you know," Bugenhagen told
Cloud.
"Who are they?"
"On my left is I. M. Weasel and on the cage over there is I. R. Baboon. Mr. Weasel caught
Mr. Baboon because of fantasizing over Tifa."
Cloud then approached the two persons and introduced himself. After that, he looked closely
at what Weasel is doing.
"Hmmm... This is really the most exquisite script I've ever seen in my entire life...
Anyway, the inscriptions say that we need an item called the Mega Phoenix to revive Aeris.
And for the portal, we need a confidential Shinra document and the three rarest materia
in this world to open it," Weasel said.
"No problemo, I. M.! I'm a Shinra employee and I can fax a document for you," added Cait
Sith.
"Yeah, but watch out fo' you' consequences of you' actions, you damn cat," Barret interrup-
ted.
"But how about the Mega Phoenix and the three materia? I don't think we can have them,"
Vincent worried.
"The three materia? They are, like, in my, like, house," Yuffie said.
"We don't have time left. We must get going," Cloud commanded.
Then the team goes to work. The boys search the area for the Mega Phoenix, Cait Sith calls
the Shinra HQ for a confidential document to be faxed, and the girls go to Wutai to get
the rare materia apparently hidden in Yuffie's house: Knights of the Round, Quadra Magic,
and Mime.
After two and a half hours...
"Very good, my brave-hearted friends! You have found the necessary ingredients! All we
have to do now is to revive Aeris. Cloud, will you do the honors?" stated Weasel.
"Of course."
The whole team then goes to the body of water where Aeris is buried. Baboon, as always,
is left behind in the cage, wondering what will happen next.
Cloud, clutching the Mega Phoenix, walks to the exact spot where Aeris is buried. He then
hurls the thing into the air and shouts, "Master of rebirth, breathe new life into the
body of a girl who never had the joys of a woman! Ultra-Life!"
A shining column of light then appears from the sky and immediately penetrates the crystal
blue water. Moments later, a holographic image of Aeris appears in the spot where the light
penetrated. It suddenly walks over the water, coming closer to Cloud and co. And as the
image's feet touched the ground, it transformed into the new, improved, revitalized (man,
looks like I'm advertising a product... --Author) Aeris.
Cloud is struck with awe as he sees Aeris in the flesh. He hastily runs towards her and
then embraces her. The two tightly hug each other and shed tears of joy afterwards.
"Aeris, you're back! I missed you so much."
"Cloud, I missed you too."
"Now that Sephiroth and Jenova are gone for good, let us share our brand-new moments
together."
"Yeah. I'm glad to hear the news. And after that fiasco, do you still love me?"
"Certainly." (Note: I'm showing no prejudice towards the advocates of the Cloud-Tifa
loveteam. Period. --Author)
"Oh, that's good to hear. But, how did you revive me?"
"I used a rare revival item on you. And I did it on purpose."
"What purpose?"
"We've gotta stop a terrorist from wreaking havoc on a planet called Earth."
"Another villain? And what's the reward?"
"I'll marry you."
"Oh, thank you."
Cloud and Aeris then close their eyes and position their lips, ready to kiss. Their lips
draw closer and closer until Weasel shouted, "Mister Strife! Miss Gainsborough! The portal
is open! We must hurry! There's no time to lose!"
"We'll save our kiss for later," Cloud said to Aeris. "After all, those terrorists that
we'll face are extremely conservative. PDA's are eyesores for them."
He then turns around and said, "Excuse me, Weasel. How will you release Baboon from the
cage?"
"I will tell him that he must not fantasize the girls. They are beautiful, but they can
kick butt too."
The whole group then rushes to the portal and are sucked inside. The portal then vanishes.
Who knows where on Earth will they land?
***
Squall and co. currently hold a meeting with the headmaster of Balamb Garden.
"Squall, what is the purpose of leaving this world, you say?" asked Cid.
"Sir, we must eliminate a terrorist on a planet called Earth," Squall replied.
"Well, this mission will be the same as in Dollet, but the problem is the method
of teleportation."
"Esthar is good at advanced technology like that, sir. We can meet Dr. Odine right away."
"Good. Now pilot the Ragnarok. And don't forget to invite Laguna, Kiros, and Ward. That
will make a total of nine personnel for this mission. Meeting dismissed."
And as Squall and co. leave the headmaster's office, his buddies have mixed thoughts
on the forthcoming mission.
"Yeah! Time to kick the terrorist's ass," Zell said enthusiastically.
"But I feel something bad," Rinoa worried. "I might turn into a scorceress again when I
meet the doctor."
"Don't worry, Rinoa," Squall replied. "Ultimecia's gone, so you'll be fine."
Irvine startles the group with his question: "Will our enemies be as tough as those
Galbadian soldiers?"
"Man, it's so hard to answer," Selphie stated.
"It's because we don't have any info on the terrorists on Earth yet," Quistis added.
The group then boards the Ragnarok and flies off to Esthar.
They plan to meet Dr. Odine first, then they will escort him to Pres. Loire.
As they journey through the streets of Esthar, they see no signs of monsters. The reason
is that there will be no unexpected Lunar Cries because the Lunatic Pandora is now
inactive.
They arrive at last at Dr. Odine's lab. His assistant recognizes and greets them. After-
wards he takes them to the doctor himself.
"Oh, how nice of you to come," Dr. Odine salutated them. "Vell, vhat service can I offer
you?"
"Doctor, we badly need a teleportation device to go to a planet called Earth," Squall
answered. "We have a mission to eliminate the terrorists there."
"Very good. I have built a teleportation device right before I conducted ze research
on ze sorceress. Vait a minute. I vill be back vid ze device."
Squall and co. stand still while waiting for the device. While doing so, the brains of
the mission pondered, "I think the answer to Irvine's question earlier is... the terrorists
are tougher. They use all merciless methods to sow terror everywhere. It's in the name."
Dr. Odine arrives at the place where the group waited, carrying a huge oval mirror with
electronic thingies attached to its frame.
"Vhew, zis iz so heavy," Odine said. "But anyway, one push of ze button and voila! You're
transported."
"Thanks, doc. But we won't warp to Earth unless we join Laguna and co. with us," Squall
stated.
"Oh man. But I know zat it iz required by ze headmaster of your Garden, right?"
"Right. Now please take me to Laguna."
Squall, his friends, and Odine (with the device) then drives to the Presidential Palace.
There they are welcomed by the palace staff until they go to the office of the President.
"Good to see you again, Squall," Laguna greeted. "And Doc, how's life?"
"Vell, Mr. President, Squall and company vant to join you, Kiros, and Ward into zeir
mission on a planet called Earth to eliminate ze terrorists zere," Odine replied.
"Here iz ze teleportation device to be used."
"Well, I'm engaging into combat again. Guess it's time to become soldiers again, right,
Kiros, Ward?" Laguna asked.
"After all, we helped them in their dreams," Kiros answered. "And it's good to pay back
the kindness we gave them."
Ward, still mute, gives a smile of approval.
"We don't have time left! Irvine, activate the portal and let's go!" Quistis commanded.
"Yeah, I'm itchin' to kick ass," Zell responded.
Irvine immediately presses the button on the device. A portal appears. Squall, Laguna, and
the rest of the gang leaped into the portal. Moments later it disappeared.
"Have a safe journey, people," Odine said. "Hmmm... Vill I be ze temporary president for
now?"
***
Zidane and company (with Cid's assistants) are now busy in building the new airship.
With their strong work ethic that they learned after defeating Kuja and Necron, they finish
it in just two days.
"Whew, it's like we're building Noah's Ark," Zidane tiringly said.
"But at least we are done already," Regent Cid replied. "Now the whole team is complete."
"Wait a second. Vivi disappeared, and in his place his sons appear right here. How do we
handle this?" Steiner interrogated.
"Let us name the eldest son Vivi Orunitia, Jr. Then his next-in-line brothers will be named
Vivi III, Vivi IV, etc., etc."
"What a dumb naming proposal it is! It will breed confusion," Freya complained.
"But at least we are invloving Vivi in the fight against the terrorists. So there."
Zidane and company then boards the Invincible II. Cid and his assistants await outside
at the dock.
What does the new airship look like? The airship's design duplicates the original, but it
has airplane engine-like devices that activate a large portal.
"Start main engine!" Cid commanded.
The main engine roars in full glory.
"Activate portal controls!"
A large portal appears in Lindblum, about as huge as the eidolon Atomos when it attacked
the city proper.
"Sail for main destination: Earth!"
The Invincible II then moves towards the portal. The latter sucks the former like a vacuum
cleaner.
"May you have a safe trip! And bring me some souvenirs, too!"
One of Cid's assistants reacted, "Hey! Those terrorists carry deadly weapons from the
future. What will you do, use them to conquer other kingdoms?"
"Whoops. Those terrorists are really not gift givers."
***
Tidus and his buddies wander around Spira to find a person who would warp them into Earth.
They are nearly exhausted until a band of Al Bhed bandits (apparently the friends of those
who kidnapped Yuna) meet them.
The bandit leader said in the Al Bhed language, "Hey you guys! Surrender everything you
have, or else we'll kill you!"
Rikku heard the message and translated it for the rest of the group.
Wakka yelled, "We won't give all our stuff to you! In fact, we defeated the curse of Yevon!
So beat it, you knuckleheads!"
Rikku said Wakka's message in Al Bhed.
The leader reacted. "Well, let's see 'bout that," he said in Al Bhed, then kicked Kimahri's
shin.
"OOOWWWW! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" Kimahri shouted. His fury then bursts and pummels the
bandits mercilessly. A thick cloud appears, covering much of the action.
Kimahri soon grows tired of beating them, and the cloud disappears. And do you know who
are those bandits? They're really the Backstreet Boys!
"Enough of fighting," Nick Carter said. "We pretended as Al Bhed bandits so that we will
defeat our rivals N'Sync, who reportedly joined a blitzball team."
Tidus asked, "Abes or Aurochs?"
A.J. McLean answered, "I think it's Abes."
"What? This is so controversial!" Tidus exclaimed.
"Ha ha! Those guys don't know blitzball!" Wakka teased Tidus. "Now my team will win at
last!"
"Shut up," Tidus reacted.
"Hey, if you wanna join us, then go to Zanarkand Stadium," Brian Littrell explained.
"It's Abes vs. Aurochs there."
Tidus and Wakka face off and you can feel sparks between their eyes.
"Hey, you two, stop staring like that and get going!" the two remaining members, Kevin
Richardson and Howie Dorough, yelled.
Tidus, his buddies, and the Backstreet Boys then mosey on to the stadium. They can feel
the capacity crowd upon entering the stadium.
The big game is sure to have some big rivalry. Tidus vs. Wakka. Backstreet Boys vs. N'Sync.
And that game starts. You can really feel the heat of the blitzball action underwater.
(Note: I really didn't play FF10, so I don't know much about blitzball. Sorry, guys.
--Author)
Later, Tidus and Wakka have been assigned as the passers for each team. Before the start
of the next period, they rattled and rambled and taunted each other.
And then the inevitable happens. A dummy of a Sinspawn (operated by none other than
Mariah Carey... hehehe) appears in the water, facing Tidus and Wakka. The dummy casts
a fake version of Gravija on the two, sucking them into the black globe.
Now the black globe created by the fake Gravija grows bigger and bigger and eventually
covers the playfield. Yuna and the others are wondering and worrying where Tidus and
Wakka are. They believe that the black globe sucked Tidus and Wakka, so they leap in there.
And you know... That black globe is really a portal to Earth. Any questions?
***
Brave heroes...
Gather round in the mountainous regoins of a country called Afghanistan...
Here you will fight those meddling terrorists.
Good luck on your bout!
(end of chapter)
