Disclaimer: I own Hex, Maeve, Peter, Norman, and Zippo the Fluffernutter. I also made up the Itching Curse, and I own Maggie McGonagall, the Healer's Garden and Tiny. JK Rowling owns the world they live in. HMV, the "New York, New York" song and the Jaws movie belong to whoever makes money off them. The New York Rangers (who RULE even though they haven't made the playoffs in…a while :D) belong to themselves. Dumbledore's hat also belongs to me, but he can keep it as a Christmas present.
Technical Notes: I'm not sure what they call equivalency exams in Britain, so pardon my inaccuracy. I did feel they were necessary, as Hex was Muggle-educated and did not enter Hogwarts as a first year. (All other American transfers to Hogwarts, take note!)
The Equivalency Exams
The next morning, Hex dragged himself out of bed to have breakfast with the students who were going home for the holidays. "Aren't you going home?" Peter asked as Hex helped him haul his trunk downstairs. The big boy was going to spend Christmas at his family's farm somewhere in Wales.
"No, I'm working." They set the trunk down in the corridor outside the Great Hall, where other students were waiting to leave. Hex chuckled. "I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to wake up today, since we got in late last night and everything."
Peter smiled. "It was a good party, wasn't it?"
"Yep. Did Susan have fun?"
"She said she did."
"Did she kiss you good night?" Hex grinned when his friend turned red. "Congratulations. She's a real nice girl."
"Yes, she is." Peter watched as students began to file toward the main doors. "Time to leave."
"Yeah. Take care now, OK?"
"You, too." They shook hands. "Good luck on your exams."
"Thanks. See you in the New Year."
The Healer's Garden was rather busy in the days leading up to Christmas. Aside from people doing their holiday shopping, there were also quite a few buying Maggie's special cold-weather tea and throat lozenges. "These lozenges are ever so much better than the kind I buy at the chemist's," a well-dressed woman said as she purchased a packet. "The day after I take one, my sore throat is gone. It's like magic!"
"It's all in the herbs, ma'am," Hex said, grinning and handing over the woman's purchase in a recycled-paper sack. "Here you go. Merry Christmas."
"And a Happy Christmas to you, too, young man." She smiled and nodded, then stepped out into the crisp winter morning, leaving Hex to do some more reviewing for his equivalency exams, which were coming up in a few days.
The tinkling of the little bell over the shop door had him looking up from his Potions text, but it was only Maggie, back from her errands. "Anyone buy anything while I was gone?"
"We're almost out of the throat lozenges," Hex reported. "What do you put in there, anyway?"
"It's a slower-acting version of Madam Pomfrey's Pepperup Potion. I didn't think it would be good to copy it exactly, because it cures colds instantly. The Muggles will ask questions." She looked at him as she opened a cabinet to refresh their stock of lozenges. "How is the studying going?"
Hex shrugged. "OK." The truth was he wasn't feeling particularly prepared, but if he admitted that, Maggie would tell him he wasn't reviewing enough, and he wasn't sure if his brain could work any harder.
"Well, don't overwork yourself," Maggie said. "We don't want you forgetting everything you've learned on the day of the exams, do we?"
"I've been reviewing for the past month," he said, flipping through the formula for a Fireproofing Potion. "I guess I'm just making sure I haven't missed anything."
"I'm sure you'll do just fine." His boss winked at him. "Between you, me and the lamppost, Minerva says you've done very well so far. It's not easy learning new lessons and the basics at the same time."
"Professor McGonagall said that?" He grinned. "That makes me feel a lot better, Maggie. Thanks."
Maggie dimpled. "No charge. Now, I want you to keep this safe in your book, and give it to my sister or to Dumbledore when you get back." It was another sealed envelope. "Don't give it to anyone else! And don't let anyone see you with it!"
Hex took the envelope and stuck it between the pages of his Potions book, which then refused to close. Maggie's envelopes had gotten thicker in the recent weeks. In fact, he noted privately, they had gotten thicker after the news about the Lestranges broke out. "I know the drill."
On December 23rd, Hex took the day off work to take a series of tests covering the first to fourth year curricula. There were monumental essays for Astronomy, Herbology and History of Magic, and a long list of equations for Arithmancy. For Transfiguration, he was required to make a series of objects take on more and more complex forms. It was hard to ignore Professor McGonagall's penetrating stare, but Hex managed to focus on the tasks at hand. "Very good, Holmstrom," she said as he successfully turned a chair into a swan. "Professor Dumbledore will be happy to know that we haven't put our faith in you for nothing."
Hex grinned. It was the first time he ever had seen her smile. "Thanks, Professor."
She nodded regally. "You may go on to your next exam."
In Charms, Professor Flitwick had him demonstrate levitation. "Excellent, Mr. Holmstrom!" the tiny professor squeaked as Hex slowly lowered a small cauldron back to the floor. "Now, shall we try this one?"
He went on to try and make a board full of chess pieces dance and sing. It took a few attempts before they formed a chorus line. "Well done!" Professor Flitwick said as the chess pieces filed past him singing "New York, New York." "See what happens when you are in the correct state of mind?"
"Yes, sir, I sure do."
The last part of Hex's Charms exam was to put a Cheering Charm on Filch the caretaker, who had been coerced into acting as the guinea pig. "I don't want to feel cheerful!" Filch snarled.
"Now, now, Argus, it will only last a while," Professor Flitwick assured him. "If Mr. Holmstrom here manages to cheer you up, then we'll know for sure that he can do it, won't we?"
"Do you promise to lift the spell as soon as you see that it works?"
"Of course," the professor said a little too smoothly. "Mr. Holmstrom, you may proceed."
Hex took a deep breath, willed himself to relax, and said "Jovialus!"
There was a heart-stopping pause before Filch began to smile. "Oh, this is disgusting," he said in a singsong voice. "I feel revoltingly warm and happy inside!"
"He's not faking it, is he?" Hex asked the teacher.
Professor Flitwick smiled and shook his head. "Mr. Filch doesn't know how to pretend that he's happy. Congratulations, Mr. Holmstrom! You did it!"
By now, Filch was starting to laugh. "This is terrible! I can't stop laughing! Make it stop, Professor! Make it stop!"
"I think," the professor said conspiratorially to Hex, "that we'll keep him this way for a while."
For Care of Magical Creatures, Hex was given different types of food, and he had to match a certain creature to each kind of food. He quickly eliminated the sausages by feeding them to Zippo, who snarled in recognition; and thought of bringing all the remaining options to each animal in turn, and feeding them the food that they went for. (It was just his luck that all the magical creatures in this exam were very picky eaters.)
Hex found himself in a quandary when he was left with shredded lettuce and sugar cubes, and he still had to feed a flobberworm and a unicorn that wouldn't go near him. (Professor Grubbly-Plank, the substitute called in to take Hagrid's place while he was away on business for Dumbledore, said it was only to be expected, since unicorns preferred a female's touch — Hex suspected she was also a bit of a man-hater.) He'd never seen either one before he came to Hogwarts, but remembered that horses were given sugar cubes as treats.
"Very good, Mr. Holmstrom," Professor Grubbly-Plank said as the unicorn went for the sugar cubes Hex left in its pen and he fed the lettuce to the flobberworm. "Full marks. Not everyone would have thought of offering all the food to each creature in turn. You may go on to your next exam."
Hex's last two exams were in Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Snape must have done that on purpose, he thought wryly as he made his way to the Potions dungeon. The professor probably figured Hex would be too tired or nervous to concentrate, and he would fail easily. "I hope he isn't right," he muttered as he entered the room where Professor Snape awaited him.
"For your Potions examination, you have two hours to correctly mix up these potions," Snape told Hex, eyes glittering maliciously as he handed him a list of five very complex concoctions. "I will give you your Defense examination only if you pass the Potions examination."
Great, Hex thought as he took the list, looked it over and got to work assembling ingredients. Just like the Transfiguration exam, it was difficult to concentrate with Snape stalking around and staring, but Hex willed himself to focus on preparing his ingredients, prioritizing the ones that needed to be brewed for a long time. While preparing the others, he kept an eye on the cauldrons already on the fire in order to add the correct ingredients at the correct times. He was done precisely at the two-hour mark.
Hex stood silently as Snape scrutinized each potion. "All right, Holmstrom, you managed to squeak by," he said finally. "Now take a seat and begin your Defense essay. You have one hour."
The essay was easy enough, being on the various dark creatures and how one could overcome them. Hex finished it before his time was up.
The professor smiled evilly as he took the roll of parchment. "Thought that was it, did you? Sorry to disappoint you, Holmstrom, but the examination is not over yet. Draw your wand."
Hex swore he could hear the Jaws theme song playing in his head as he followed Snape to the front of the chamber, his wand at the ready. He'd practiced dueling with Hermione and Harry (who was pretty good), but facing a fully-grown wizard was something else.
They faced each other and nodded curtly in deference to etiquette. "Not to worry, Holmstrom," Snape drawled. "I'll try not to kill you."
"Cool," Hex said, staring at his teacher. He figured the trash talking was part of the dueling, but he was too busy reviewing curses and counter-curses to think of any good comebacks.
All of a sudden, a jet of red light shot out of Snape's wand and Hex ducked to avoid being hit by the curse. It hit the wall instead. "You won't win any duels that way, Holmstrom," the professor snapped. "Pay attention next time. Furnunculus!"
Again, Hex dove to the floor to avoid the curse.
"Holmstrom! Stop taking the coward's way out! Stand and fight!"
"Expelliarmus!" they yelled in unison.
"Better," Snape said as his wand flew out of his hand and he caught Hex's at the same time. "But you forget, a wizard will never get the same results with another's wand."
Where had he heard that before? Hex racked his brain and grinned as he remembered what Mr. Ollivander had told him. "According to Mr. Ollivander, I'm an exception to the rule. Rashora!" he said, waving Snape's wand.
Almost instantly, Professor Snape began scratching as the curse brought about an uncontrollable itch all over his body. "Serpensortia!"
Hex watched as a garter snake sprang from the wand in Snape's hand. "I can see what you mean about the different wand, different results thing."
"Stop that babbling and put and end to this itching!"
"Right. Sorry. Finite Incantatem." Hex warily watched the teacher as he stopped scratching and they returned each other's wands.
Snape straightened his robes and made the small snake vanish. "That was an adequate strategy," he admitted grudgingly. "Curses such as the Itching Curse can distract an opponent long enough for you to disarm him. Stop staring at me, Holmstrom. The examination is over."
Maeve was waiting outside the dungeons with Hermione, Harry and the Weasleys when Hex was dismissed. "How did it go?" she asked him.
"Fine," Hex said as they walked down the corridor, "even though I got a little stuck in Charms."
"What about Snape's exams?" Ron asked. "What did he make you do?"
"He gave me two hours to make five potions at the same time."
"That slimy git! No one can do that!"
"Well, it looks like I did. He said he wouldn't give me the Defense Against the Dark Arts exam if I didn't pass Potions, and I took it."
"What did you do for the Defense exam?" Harry asked.
"I wrote an essay, and then we dueled."
"You what?" Ginny gasped.
"Cool!" the Weasley twins chorused. "If we knew he was going to let us do that sort of thing, we should have asked Dumbledore to make him the Defense Against the Dark Arts master much sooner!"
"I don't think that's allowed!" Hermione told them.
"We had that dueling club back in second year, remember?" Ron reminded her.
"That was students dueling against each other. Hex dueled against a teacher!"
"What did you do in the duel?" George asked.
"I hope you got him good!" Fred said with relish.
"Uh, well, he tried to curse me a couple of times, but I kept ducking," Hex admitted. "Then we disarmed each other, so we switched wands, and I put an Itching Curse on him."
"And it worked?"
"Yep." He grinned as they all laughed, probably picturing Snape scrubbing his back against a stone pillar like a cat with a scratching post.
"I'm proud of you, son," Fred told him. The Weasley twins had taught Hex the Itching Curse.
"This is a truly great day," George agreed, pretending to wipe away a tear.
"You used Snape's wand to put the curse on him?" Hermione asked in disbelief. "I thought wizards don't get the same results with—"
"Hex can use any wand and his spells will always work perfectly," Maeve told her. "That's what Mr. Ollivander told him."
"Fascinating! Not that many people can do that, you know."
"I suppose you found that out by reading Hogwarts, A History," Ron teased.
"No, actually, it was from The Advanced Magical Anatomy."
"Do you think you passed?" Ginny asked Hex.
"I hope so," he said. "McGonagall said they'd talk about it tomorrow and let me know on the 25th."
"Well, it's all out of your control now," George said. "Best not to worry about it anymore."
"That's right," Fred agreed. "How about a snowball fight in the courtyard? Last one out's a rotten dragon's egg!"
Hex awoke on Christmas morning to the sound of crackling paper. "Merry Christmas, Norman," he mumbled sleepily, as all of the other fifth year boys went home for the holidays. The cat mewed briefly, and continued to claw at the pile of presents at the foot of his bed.
"Hey, those are mine," Hex laughed as he watched Norman tug at the ribbon on a neatly wrapped package. Norman hissed, mewed loudly, and went back to the present.
"OK, OK, let's see what we got," he told the cat, picking it up.
The package was from Maeve and contained a handsome quill and elegant silver inkpot, as well as a catnip mouse for Norman. "No wonder you wanted me to open that first," he chuckled as the cat ran off with his present in his mouth.
Peter had given him a pocketknife with all kinds of interesting blades and tools, and Maggie a new school bag. A travel-rumpled package from Tiny contained a New York Rangers home jersey, and another from Hagrid yielded a box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. Hex also received a yellow Hufflepuff hat, with his name embroidered on the back, from Samira; a gift check good for one CD at HMV from Justin; and a blue sweater from Mrs. Weasley, perhaps in apology for the surprise visit from Ron's father.
Hex found Maeve in the common room, reading by the fire with Norman in her lap. "Hey," he greeted her. "Merry Christmas."
She smiled at him. "Merry Christmas," she replied.
"Nice shirt."
"Thank you." She was wearing his Christmas present to her, a pink T-shirt with angels painted on the front. "I really like it."
"Thanks for the quill and inkpot. And Norman says thank you for the mouse."
"You're very welcome. Did Samira give you a hat, too?"
"Yeah. I guess she got one for everyone on the team."
"It was very nice of her."
"Yeah. So…" He looked around. Only a handful of Hufflepuffs were staying in Hogwarts for the holidays, and it looked like most of them were already downstairs. "Want to go have breakfast?"
"All right."
"Nice jumper!" Fred Weasley chortled as Hex entered the Great Hall for Christmas dinner that night.
"Thanks," Hex replied, grinning, although he wasn't exactly sure what a "jumper" was. He supposed Fred meant the sweater. Harry, Hermione and the Weasleys were all wearing sweaters remarkably like his. "It was real nice of your mom to make me one."
"It was the least she could do after Ron nearly had you arrested."
"Shut up, Fred," his brother muttered, turning red as everyone laughed.
Everyone sat at a single table, enabling the teachers to dine with the few students staying in Hogwarts over the holidays. However, this did not mean that the feast was any less extravagant. There were several roast geese, sides of beef and legs of lamb, each dish accompanied by all the appropriate trimmings, and an array of rich desserts. Hex's first-ever British Christmas cracker emitted a foghorn blast, engulfed him in grape-scented purple smoke, and spat a garish jester's hat and set of glittering musical jacks onto his lap.
Dumbledore sat at the head of the table, a furry baby-blue bowler hat on his head, and beamed as everyone did justice to the banquet provided. "Ah…I do love a good leg of lamb," he said, dabbing at his mouth with a napkin as the remains of the chocolate mousse faded from everyone's plates. "I trust everyone ate to their heart's content?"
He smiled as Ron groaned assent, patting his full stomach. "I see Mr. Weasley did. Well, before we return to our dormitories, a few announcements.
"First, I am very pleased to announce that Mr. Hex Holmstrom passed his equivalency examinations with flying colors…"
"You did it!" Maeve whispered to Hex, beaming as the other students applauded and patted his back in congratulations. From across the table, Dumbledore smiled benignly and raised his goblet while Hagrid, who had returned to Hogwarts just that afternoon, whooped and banged his on the table, sloshing wine over the rim. Professor Sprout clapped her hands delightedly and, unable to contain herself, walked over and gave him a hug. Snape stared stonily into his goblet. Hex supposed that Snape either was not pleased, or that was as close as he came to looking happy.
"For this remarkable achievement," Dumbledore continued, "Mr. Holmstrom wins seventy points for Hufflepuff House." He smiled as the Hufflepuffs at the table cheered and treated Hex to a few more back slaps. "And for ably meeting the challenge of tutoring Mr. Holmstrom, I award fifty points to Miss Hermione Granger."
"Only fifty?" Ron said as the Gryffindors congratulated a blushing Hermione. "She did all the work!"
"He took the examinations," Maeve reminded him, arching a warning eyebrow.
"Uh, right," he agreed quickly. "I forgot."
Hex grinned. He supposed Ron was thinking back to Halloween night and wondering what he ever saw in Maeve. "Wait 'til I tell Tiny I can stay at Hogwarts!" he said, by way of changing the subject.
"Who is Tiny?" Ginny asked
"My boss back home. He was always after me to study and behave and stuff."
"I'm sure he'll be very pleased," Hermione said, flushed with her success as a tutor and the points she had won for her house. "Do you see what kind of things you can achieve when you apply yourself?"
"That's exactly what Tiny would say."
Concluding Remarks: Up next, the Gryffindor-Hufflepuff match! In the meantime, please read and review! ~ Ara Kane
