Disclaimer: I own the Hufflepuff quidditch team, the commentators' nicknames, Golden Horns, and Maggie McGonagall. JK Rowling owns Hogwarts, its inhabitants, and the Wronski Feint. Justin's "are you ready" catchphrase belongs to whoever is making money off the old D-generation X gimmick and the tuba, as always, belongs to the great Gordon Korman.
Technical Notes: To anyone who owns and has memorized Quidditch Through the Ages, please be informed that I do not have a copy. Therefore, I am not aware of the quidditch maneuvers classified by QTTA as illegal. Any and all maneuvers used in this fic came purely from my imagination.
We're Hufflepuffs, Dammit!
"This is it, ladies and gentlemen!" Lee Jordan announced dramatically one cool spring morning. Almost instantly, the crowd packing the stands erupted. "This is the big day—" he said over the mad yelling going on all around the commentators' seats.
"—the moment of truth—" Justin intoned.
"—the one we've all been waiting for—"
"—the Final Showdown!" This final, dramatic pronouncement was punctuated with an impossibly loud roar from the crowd. "Are—you—readyyyyy?"
Down below the stands, Hex shook his head at Justin's rant. "He's bringing out every old catchphrase in the book!"
"This morning's match-up pits defending champions Gryffindor against the Cinderella Hufflepuff team! This is the Gabbling Gryffindor, Lee Jordan—"
"—and Justin 'the Muggle Mouth' Finch-Fletchley! That's right, Lee, this morning, it's the Bold Red and Gold in action against the Yellow and Black Attack for the ultimate prize — the Hogwarts Quidditch Cup! After this game is over, only one team will reign supreme as the best in school quidditch this year, while the other goes away empty-handed!"
The crowd cheered excitedly, but hidden away below the bleachers, Robert groaned and turned an even nastier shade of green. "Thank you, Justin, put some more pressure on us, will you?"
"He can't hear you," Bridget told the Hufflepuff Keeper absently, gazing off into space.
"Try to relax, Robert," Peggy suggested as she paced the length of the tunnel. "Do something else to take your mind off the…you-know-what."
"No, I don't know what," he replied. "What?"
"The match, silly!" At her words, Peggy grimaced and stamped her foot in annoyance. "There, now you've got me thinking about it! Thanks a lot!"
"I wouldn't have asked you if you hadn't brought it up!"
"Come off it," Maeve said in a tone as zoned-out as Bridget's. "Don't fight so close to the match."
Peggy and Robert nevertheless continued to glare at each other. They would have gone at it again if Samira hadn't shown up with Professor Sprout, who was bedecked with a number of rather soiled yellow rosettes and carried an outsize daffodil to show her support for her house team. "All right, everyone?" their captain asked. She was smiling, but her back was rigid with tension.
"Fine," Robert grumbled.
"Professor Sprout wanted to come by and wish us luck," Samira said. The teacher, grinning broadly, nodded speechlessly.
"Thank you, Professor," Timothy said, after being silent all morning. His smile was wan and he looked ready to hurl. Hex knew the feeling.
When Professor Sprout finally spoke, her voice was thick with emotion. "Never in all my days at Hogwarts have I seen Hufflepuff reach the quidditch final. You've done so well, my dears, and we are all so proud of you." She looked around at them, her eyes brimming. "Who would have thought you would come this far?"
"Samira did," Maeve said softly.
"We all did," Samira corrected, her eyes misting over. "We all believed."
"And we all believe that we'll win," Hex said firmly.
Professor Sprout smiled and touched his cheek in motherly benediction. "Just do your best, my dears, and Hufflepuff House will stick by you, win or lose."
"We love you too, Professor Sprout," Bridget cried, impulsively hugging their Head of House. Sniffling, the other girls followed suit and they clung to each other, sobbing and laughing at the same time.
Hex traded wry glances with Robert and Timothy before finally joining the group hug. But as he held everyone else in his arms, there was a curious swelling in his chest. It was then that he realized that Professor McGonagall's words before the Sorting Ceremony were correct. The Hufflepuffs were more than just roommates, classmates, even friends — they were his family. And while Professor Sprout was old, absentminded, and a little too attached to the earth, she did more than her job required. She loved them.
Hex breathed deeply as the team embraced, inhaling the combination of people, earth, plants, water, flowers. Professor Sprout smelled like life.
"Ladies and gentlemen," Lee announced, "we have just been informed that this match is a carry-over of the previous one in January, which got called off due to unrelated events. The score thus stands at 50-20 in favor of Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff leads in the overall standings by 170 points. All Gryffindor needs to do is score at least three more goals and catch the Snitch to win the Hogwarts Quidditch Cup!" At his pronouncement, the Gryffindor supporters cheered, waving their scarves and banners. The banner held by Hermione, Parvati and Ginny depicted a golden Gryffindor lion that roared whenever it was waved.
"That means Hufflepuff must protect its lead and catch the Snitch early in the game," Justin said. "And I wouldn't bet against that just yet, Lee. Maeve Moondaughter has yet to miss the Snitch this year!"
"That's right!" Ernie shouted, and the rest of the Hufflepuffs backed him up, cheering and waving their own banners and a fair number of huge yellow spring flowers. Professor Sprout had opened the greenhouses to her Hufflepuffs as her contribution to the booster effort, and every yellow bloom had been harvested for the cause. The Golden Horns, enormous bell-shaped flowers that could be used as megaphones, were especially popular.
"That's unfair competition, Zinnia," Professor McGonagall said as Professor Sprout returned to her seat beside the Gryffindor Head of House.
The other teacher smiled as her students made good use of their Golden Horns. "If you had wanted to transfigure your bleachers into lions, my dear Minerva, I wouldn't have stopped you."
"Shush now!" Maggie ordered as the Hufflepuffs began to stomp and sing. "The players are coming!"
"Ladies and gentlemen," Justin intoned, "introducing the challengers…Padgett! Derwent! Houlihan! Sabo! Abbott! Holmstrom! Aaaaaand…Moondaughter!" He took a deep breath and poured every ounce of his being into bellowing his house team's name. "I give you the Yellow and Black Attack—YOUR HUFFLEPUFF QUIDDITCH TEAM!!!"
Signs waved, banners billowed and the Hufflepuff four-person tuba blew as the seven yellow-robed players burst from their tunnel, whooping exuberantly. Hex and Robert waved their arms, goading the crowd into cheering (or booing) louder, yelling things no one could hear. Peggy and Samira circled the pitch with determined looks on their faces. And Timothy — mild-mannered Timothy Derwent — threw back his head and let loose a hair-raising rebel yell that put Hermione's magical banner to shame.
"And the defending champions…" Lee began then, bringing the Gryffindor side to life. "Playing this afternoon for the Bold Red and Gold — Thomas! Bell! Johnson! Weasley! Weasley! Weasley! Aaaaaand…Potter! Ladies and gentlemen, the Gryffindor quidditch team!"
The adrenaline was rushing through Hex's system as the red-clad Gryffindor players took their places opposite the Hufflepuffs. "Captains, shake hands!" Madam Hooch instructed.
But instead of just shaking hands, Samira and Angelina embraced. "A sportswomanly gesture from our two quidditch captains," Lee said as the onlookers applauded. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is Angelina Johnson's final match for Gryffindor, as she will be graduating from Hogwarts in June."
"So will Katie Bell and the Weasley twins, I believe," Justin observed. "And so will you, Lee. Gryffindor quidditch will be radically different next year."
"But in the meantime," Lee said brightly, "we're all still here. The balls are released!" Everyone watched the tiny Golden Snitch circle Maeve's and Harry's heads before disappearing in the sun. Madam Hooch then blew a mighty blast on her whistle. "And the game begins!…Bell takes first possession of the Quaffle for Gryffindor — she's speeding toward the Hufflepuff goal with Derwent right on her tail…"
"Stay off her tail, boyo!" George Weasley bellowed, sending a Bludger Timothy's way. Katie giggled as Timothy went off-course to avoid the ball and George shifted into place behind her. "I'm the only one who covers her rear around here!"
"And I've got her front, Weasley!" Bridget announced as she cut in out of nowhere, startling the Quaffle out of Katie's arms.
"The action shifts to the Gryffindor side of the pitch as Houlihan pulls off a massive steal!" Justin announced. "Abbott and Holmstrom are on hand to keep the Gryffindors away…Houlihan coming closer and closer to face off against rookie Keeper Thomas…She's veering left—no, right—left again—she shoots—"
"Denied!" Lee chortled and the Hufflepuffs groaned. Instead of contending with Bridget's guard of honor, Ron had come from underneath to steal the Quaffle before it could enter the goalpost. He dodged a Bludger and passed the red ball back to Katie, and everyone sped back toward the Hufflepuff goal.
Peggy spied a stray Bludger. She and Fred were both speeding toward it when a loud chirping issued from the stands. Large yellow canaries were sitting in the places of three or four Hufflepuffs. Recognizing his handiwork, Fred pointed and laughed, distracted long enough for Peggy to take the Bludger before he could.
"Hey!" Fred protested as she sent the Bludger pelting toward Katie.
"You snooze, you lose," she said sweetly before speeding away.
The game remained scoreless for another half-hour until Angelina took a pass from Katie and sent it right past Robert. "And Johnson scores!" Lee exclaimed jubilantly as the Gryffindor supporters cheered. "Hufflepuff now leading by only 160 points!…Er, that sounded stupid, didn't it?"
Play resumed with Timothy in possession of the Quaffle. "Holmstrom arrives in time to fend off a Bludger," Justin reported. "Sabo and Houlihan join them and the Hufflepuff Chasers advance toward the Gryffindor goal…any sight of the Snitch yet?"
"Not on this side. Both Moondaughter and Potter are still wandering about aimlessly."
The Hufflepuff Chasers closed in on Dean Thomas, passing the Quaffle among themselves, but he was ready for them and turned back what looked like a sure goal. The frustration was beginning to dawn on Bridget's face. "Keep cool," Samira advised her before speeding off in pursuit of Ron Weasley. "You'll get past him next time."
But there wasn't going to be a next time. It was as if the Hufflepuff team from the previous match had been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with inept pod people. Ron easily got past Robert, and Angelina scored another goal right on his heels. "The score is tied, 50-50!" Lee cried. "The Gryffindor crowd goes mad and Potter begins a serious search for the Golden Snitch!"
It was only a matter of minutes before Katie scored her first goal of the game, earning the first Gryffindor lead. Robert ground out a curse through gritted teeth. "Let it go," Hex told him, pounding the other boy's back. "The game's not over yet."
The next moments were all Gryffindor as Ron, Angelina and Katie riddled Robert with goals. "This is unbelievable!" Lee told the half-cheering, half-silent crowd. He'd been doing most of the talking so far. "Gryffindor now leads 130-50, with Bell scoring that last goal off a penalty by Peggy Abbott! Hufflepuff calls a time out!"
"What's wrong with us?" Peggy demanded as the teams went into huddle. "We're falling apart!"
"Don't think that way," Samira said. "Only losers think that way."
Robert shrugged. "Then we're losers. Look at that score — Gryffindor is walking all over us. Everyone walks all over us. It's a historical fact."
Hex frowned. "If it's history, Rob, then it's over. It doesn't mean it'll go on forever."
"Hex is right," Samira said. "We didn't go to the quidditch final by letting people walk all over us. We made it because we fought back. Look at what we've achieved here! Why are we going to start rolling over and taking the punishment again now?"
"Because we're tired," Peggy told her in a defeated voice. She had fouled twice during the game and wasn't very happy about it. "We've done all we can and can't do any more."
"Peg," Hex said, "you're my friend and everything, but please shut the hell up. We're trying to build up morale here, not tear it down."
The other Beater turned to him sadly. "Hex, you're my friend, too, but will you just face the facts? We're losers. I don't know what came over us, thinking we could beat Gryffindor."
A dead silence followed Peggy's outburst. Then Maeve spoke. "I'm not a loser," she said quietly.
"Good on you, Maeve," Samira said, putting an arm around the smaller girl's shoulders. "I'm not a loser, either."
"I'm definitely not a loser," Hex declared.
Bridget, who had been quiet all through the discussion, looked up at them, her face wet with tears. "I don't want to be a loser," the youngest member of the team said softly. Beside her, Tim nodded his head.
"Then don't be," Samira told her. She looked around at her teammates. "We've had it drilled into our heads for years that Hufflepuffs are friendly, loyal and hardworking. And it's true. We are. But where does it say that we're soft? That we just lie around and let people walk all over us? That we're losers?" Her big brown eyes flashed dangerously. "We're Hufflepuffs, dammit! We're not afraid of hard work! We're not afraid of suffering!" She jabbed a finger in the general direction of the Gryffindor team. "We're tougher than they are!"
The Hufflepuff team that came out of that huddle was not the noisy, exuberant one that had taken the field at the beginning of the match. They, like their supporters, were now subdued, facing the mounting challenge of catching up with the Gryffindor lead. But there was a grim determination stamped on all their faces. Hufflepuff House had been branded losers for centuries simply because no one had ever tried to refute the label. The team's motto all through the season had been "Let's shock them." And the time had come to do just that.
"We can do this, Peg," Hex told his partner, giving her a hard hug before they took their places for the opening face-off. "We can win the cup, or we go down swinging. But either way, we beat something. We won't be losers."
"Gryffindor only needs 60 more points to tie!" Lee said as the game resumed with Ron Weasley in possession of the Quaffle. "Potter still looking for the Snitch…Weasley speeding toward the Hufflepuff goal—Bludger!—sorry, Holmstrom, you missed…ladies and gentlemen, the Quaffle has not left Gryffindor hands in over—OH! Weasley scores! The score is now 140-50, Gryffindor!"
"Play resumes with Hufflepuff in possession. He's speeding toward the Gryffindor goal, but Bell and Weasley are on his trail…We're seeing a lot of professional-quality playing from the Gryffindor Chasers," Justin admitted.
"Thank you, Justin. Several professional quidditch teams have, in fact, shown interest in recruiting Angelina and Katie. But I wouldn't be surprised to see Bridget Houlihan, for one, in professional action after Hogwarts. She shows real promise."
There was a tiny flash of gold near the Gryffindor goalposts. Both Maeve and Harry went after it, but the Snitch had disappeared before they got there. Timothy, on the other hand, faced Dean one on one and almost scored. Samira clapped him on the back. "Again," she told him.
Down in the stands, Susan suddenly stood up and the tuba began to blast furiously. Everyone turned to look in her direction. "What are you doing?" Hannah hissed.
"Gryffindor has out-shouted us all morning," she replied. "I don't want our team to think we've abandoned them just because we're behind."
"We're not behind. If Maeve catches the Snitch now, we can still win." Beside her, Peter rose to his feet and began to wave the Hufflepuff flag. Susan smiled at him gratefully and together the pair of them began to cheer again. "Let's go, Robert!"
Someone began to stamp his feet and little by little, the banners and noisemakers came back to life. Timothy waved his arms as he flew by, gesturing for them to cheer louder. Two more Hufflepuffs turned into canaries.
They roared when Robert turned back a shot by Angelina Johnson and action shifted back to the Gryffindor side of the field. "Abbott sends a Bludger in to take Bell off Sabo's tail," Justin reported, staring intently at the pitch. "Sabo dodges three — count them — three Weasleys, and it's just her and Thomas, facing each other down…Holmstrom is on the scene—another Gretzky Fake-out from the Hufflepuff Beater—Sabo scoooooores!!!"
Maggie McGonagall jumped to her feet, screaming wildly along with Professor Sprout and the Hufflepuffs (although she had been a Gryffindor during her Hogwarts days). "Holmstrom does it again and Samira Sabo scores for Hufflepuff!" a revived Justin cried. "The score is 140-60 in favor of Gryffindor, but Hufflepuff isn't taking it lying down!"
From that moment, the Hufflepuffs didn't sit still. The looks on their players' faces were clear: it didn't matter if they were behind, what mattered was that their team was going to fight to the very end. And the ever-loyal Hufflepuffs were going to see their team through.
The tuba blasted again as Samira did a lap around the field. They waved their banners and shouted encouragement as Gryffindor retaliated with four more goals in rapid succession. They chanted Robert's name even as Katie Bell beat him on the rebound, bringing the score to 190-60, and cheered their team right through the succeeding time-out.
"They're almost tied with us now," Samira said tensely. "The outcome of the match depends on which team can catch the Snitch first."
"No pressure, of course, Maeve," Hex managed to joke. She smiled weakly at him.
"Chasers, let's just keep trying to score. Maybe we can catch Gryffindor up on goals, maybe not. But the point is to keep trying."
"Do you still think we can win?" Robert asked in a small voice.
"I honestly don't know," Samira admitted. "But it's not really about winning anymore, is it?"
"One more goal, ladies and gentlemen!" Lee announced as play resumed. "Gryffindor needs one more goal to tie with Hufflepuff in the overall standings!" The Gryffindors roared as Ron Weasley scored right after the opening whistle. "Weasley scores! 200-60, and Gryffindor has tied Hufflepuff in total points!"
"Weasley takes a page out of Bridget Houlihan's book to score for Gryffindor," Justin said as he watched the action with a growing air of resignation. "He took the Quaffle at the opening whistle and launched it straight at the Hufflepuff goal, catching Keeper Padgett by surprise…where the heck is that Snitch? Neither Seeker seems to know."
Bridget now had the Quaffle, and she was speeding purposefully toward the Gryffindor goal. She got past Angelina Johnson and Katie Bell, and was drawing nearer to a showdown with Dean Thomas when a Bludger came pelting out of the blue and startled her into dropping the ball. She glared poisonously at Fred Weasley as a Gryffindor Chaser made off with the Quaffle. "Why don't you just give me a break, you—"
"Shut up, Bridget," Hex hissed as Bridget let loose a string of very colorful insults, "before Madam Hooch hears you!" He sent a Bludger toward Katie Bell.
"And Gryffindor is in the lead, ladies and gentlemen!" Lee cried, jumping to his feet along with all the other Gryffindors. "Katie Bell scores, bringing the totals up to 210-60 in favor of Gryffindor!"
"You must admit that the Hufflepuff side has been very successful in keeping its frustration under control," Justin said as he watched the proceedings with a growing air of resignation. "There have hardly been any penalties in this match. Play resumes with Derwent in possession of the Quaffle for Hufflepuff…Timothy is scoreless in today's match-up; on the whole, however, he has been an offensive force for Hufflepuff. I think we'll definitely see him in the lineup again next year."
Timothy was barely halfway through the field when Ron Weasley plucked the Quaffle easily out of his arms and made off with it again. "Wait 'til I get my growth spurt, you…" the Hufflepuff Chaser muttered darkly as he raced to the goalposts.
Hex, too, was racing toward the Hufflepuff goal when the Snitch sped past his nose. "Holstrom seems to have seen the Snitch," Justin reported. "He's pointing and saying something to Maeve Moondaughter…both Seekers speed off in pursuit—"
"Ladies and gentlemen, Angelina Johnson scores!" Lee yelled, wresting the megaphone out of Justin's hands. "The Gryffindor supporters go wild and the score is 220-60 in favor of Gryffindor! Unless Hufflepuff scores two more goals, the Snitch doesn't matter!"
"The Snitch will always matter, Lee," Justin insisted, his eyes following the Seekers' movements. "Finding it first is a testament to a Seeker's reflexes, speed, and skill. Potter and Moondaughter have caught sight of it now and are racing toward it—they stop, it's gone…they split up to look for it…elsewhere on the field, Padgett turns back another shot by Johnson…"
"There, near the Gryffindor stands!" Lee screamed. Hermione, Ginny and Parvati were shouting to Harry and pointing to something in front of them. "The Snitch is in front of the Gryffindor stands!"
"Potter checks Moondaughter," Justin reported tensely. "He's nearer the stands…attempts a Wronski Feint—Moondaughter doesn't buy it!" He jumped to his feet along with the rest of the screaming, stamping Hufflepuffs. "She's seen the Snitch and is speeding toward the Gryffindor stands! Potter pulls out of his dive too late—the Snitch is still there—you're going too fast, Maeve! OW! MOTHER…!"
All play stopped when Maeve hurtled into the stands, knocking over quite a few spectators. Save for groans and squeals of pain, the field was dead silent.
A pale arm emerged from a tangle of black robes and Gryffindor scarves, holding something aloft. Everyone began to cheer as Maeve extricated herself from a heap of Gryffindor fans with the Golden Snitch in her hand and a bleak look on her face.
Madam Hooch's whistle blew. The game — and the season — was over.
Concluding Remarks: Thank Merlin the season is over! I had quite a time thinking up interesting things to put into these matches. This final match especially turned my head with all the calculations I had to do. I hope you enjoyed my attempts at sports writing, at any rate.
I'm sorry I couldn't make Hufflepuff win the Quidditch Cup, but they can't win everything. (I don't want to turn them into another Gryffindor!)
And with all that quidditch stuff out of the way, that means the real interesting parts can begin! :D Stay tuned! ~ Ara Kane
