CHAPTER SCHMAGOOGALLACALLLIT
A/N: I realize that I spelled Vegeta's name two different ways: Vegeta and Vejita. I'm using the former because it's how I type it, it's what I'm used to. Sorry for any confusion I might have caused/ will cause!
~SAKURA~
"Okay," said one of them—the green one. "You can come out now." Syaoran cast a wary look at me, and I shrugged.
He let go of my hand, and casually we stepped out into the street. Cheerfully, I tried to whistle a tune.
All of them turned around and looked at us. I grinned and waved. "Welcome to the neighborhood. I'm Sakura, and that's Li-kun. So tell me, what do five super-powerful guys like you have to do in a quiet little town like this?"
The one who looked like he got in a fight with a blow-dryer scowled, his dark, angular eyebrows matching the arch in his very prominent widow's peak.
"Human," he spat. "Do you have any idea who I am?"
"Um…a guy wearing blue spandex?" I guessed, cranking up my innocent factor as high as it would go with out my face permanently stretching into my smile.
The lavender-haired one, who looked very similar to Spandex-man sighed a little. "Forgive my father. He's a bit crabby—" he shot his father a meaningful look, then continued in spite of the murderous look on his face. "I'm Trunks, Sakura. Nice to meet you. How did you know we were super-strong?"
"Brat, that's like asking Frieza how we knew he was a fruitcake or not," snapped the father.
A man wearing an orange gi laughed, and slapped the father on the back. "Vegeta, you're funny! I didn't know you had it in you!"
Vegeta crossed his arms and glared at him. "Kakarott, you thought that sick reenactment of us at the Cell games when that fool Hercule won was funny."
A confused look crossed his colleague's face. "Actually, I thought it was really entertaining. But…why do you still call me Kakarott? I'm Goku, remember?"
"Whatever."
Trunks rolled his eyes. "Ignore them. So can you tell us what's going on?"
I opened my mouth when Syaoran spoke. "Look, we'd be happy to tell you everything—if you tell us some stuff. Like…why you're here? And why you're so powerful?" He raised an eyebrow. "Unless you can't do that…?"
"Of course we can," Trunks replied sternly.
"Listen here, boy!" thundered Vegeta. "I want answers and I want them now! WHERE'S BULMA, AND WHERE IS KAKAROTT'S MATE?! AND HIS BRAT'S MATE!?" Kakarott—Goku—had to hold him back.
Goku's brat—er, son, blushed. "Vegeta, Videl…isn't…isn't my mate," he stammered, blushing furiously. "We're just friends." No one really paid attention to him, however.
"You won't any answers by yelling at me," shot back Syaoran grimly.
He glared daggers at Syaoran, who threw the glare back, and Vegeta seemed slightly surprised that he did.
"Woah, hold on a second. Who's the brat?" I asked confusedly.
I could have sworn that all five of them face-vaulted.
~
It took a while, but they ended up explaining everything to us about them. In turn, we explained about ourselves, even though I could tell by the look on Syaoran's face that he didn't trust them as far as he could physically throw them. But then again, Syaoran seldom trusts any one at all—that's my domain.
Gohan—Goku's son, explained to concept of Super Saiya-jin to us, and by then, even Syaoran looked impressed. I performed a little bit of magic by dumping bubbles on everyone.
"Bubbles!" cried Goku. "COOL!" I swear, he's a three-year-old trapped in a grown man's body.
I waved my wand and they disappeared, and all of them looked bewildered except Goku, who had an absurd pout on his face.
Trunks opened his mouth to say something when a there was a huge gust, and the click of a bullhorn.
"SON GOHAN!" a female voice bellowed. We all looked up, and saw a bright yellow helicopter.
"Schk. GOHAN, WHERE IN HELL WERE YOU?! Schk. YOU WERE LATE FOR MY FLYING LESSON! Schk." the girl's voice shrieked.
Piccolo winced and covered his ears. "SHUT UP!" he roared.
"WHAT DID HE SAY?!"
"SHUT—UP!"
"WHAAAAAAAT? NEVER MIND, YOU JOLLY GREEN GIANT! I'M LANDING!" and she landed smack in the sand box next to the Penguin Slide.
SYAORAN
A petite, pretty girl with short black hair stomped out of the helicopter, her bright blue eyes blazing.
"GOHAN YOU STOOD ME UP!"
I was strongly reminded of Mei Lin as the girl started yelling her brains out at Gohan as she jabbed her finger in his chest.
"Videl, I—VIDEL!" he yelled finally, grabbing her shoulders. Videl fell silent and looked at him.
"The lesson was tomorrow," he said softly. Every one face-vaulted again, besides me and Sakura, who was laughing silently.
"Oh."
There was a beat of silence, and then Videl whispered, "I…I'm sorry, Gohan."
Gohan shrugged. "It's a simple mistake. It's okay."
"Good." She grinned. "So can I hang out with you today?"
"Uh…" he looked at her, who was smiling innocently. "Sure."
"Cool, let me capsulate my 'copter." She ran up to the yellow machine and pressed a plate of metal. With a poof of purple smoke, there was a loud noise, and then a pop, and when the smoke cleared, it wasn't standing there, Videl was putting something small in a little box, then she stuck it in her pocket.
"Okay, let's go."
I blinked. Several times. "Was that a capsule?" I asked Trunks finally, after my voice was working again.
"Yeah," he said casually, looking down on me.
I hate being short.
"What's going on?" wondered Sakura aloud as we walked down the street.
"What do you mean?" I asked back.
"Well, let's see, Eriol's possessed or something, Tomoyo…well Tomoyo is just Tomoyo, and these Saiya-jins are here, and there are more Cards or something and…and…"
"And what?"
She whispered something that I couldn't hear.
"What did you say?"
She mumbled it a little louder this time, but I still didn't catch it.
"She said—" Piccolo began, but was interrupted by her squeal.
"PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!"
I swore, drawing upon a vast amount of adjectives and verbs, and even Vegeta looked mildly impressed.
Troubled, Goku scratched his head. "Do you think you can actually stretch it out that long, after you use a pitchfork?" he asked.
Sakura looked at me and squealed again, suddenly bouncing up and down.
"Piiiiiika, Piiiiiiiiika!"Bouncy, bouncy!" she squeaked, eyes wide and unfocused. And then she started singing.
"FELIZ NAVIDAD! OH ho ho ho, FELIZ NAVIDAD! FELIZ NAVIDAD, cumpleanos felicidad!" And apparently, there was a dance routine to her Spanish song. She grabbed me and started to tango, and my face burst into flames.
She attempted to dip me, which ended up us tripping over eachother's feet, and she fell on top of me, sitting on my abdomen/stomach. I just about died, as she hummed the last strains of her song happily.
Sakura looked as pretty as ever, silky hair falling into her flushed face as she spoke rapid Spanish, and even though I had no idea what she was saying, she was still gorgeous. Her green eyes were still unfocused, and her pupils small, as she quieted, and furrowed her eyebrows. I barely had enough time to wonder what she was going to do when she leaned forward and kissed me full on the mouth.
OMIGOD OMIGOD—wait, is that her TONGUE?!
I pulled away, and pushed her off, uncertain for a second. Then I realized that if these were induced feelings—which they no doubt were, I didn't want to delude myself into thinking otherwise. Sakura stood up, not the least bit fazed, and tilted her head, and looked at me quizzically. She just watched me.
It was creeping me out—her green eyes trained on me like spot lights, boring eyes into mine, not blinking, not actually seeing me, just…watching.
And then she fainted.
I caught her just before she hit the ground, my face about to explode.
"Well." deadpanned Gohan. "That was interesting."
~*~
Eriol scowled. His plan, OPERATION: TANGO was not working. "There must be another way!" he yelled, anger seizing hold of him.
"Eriol, shut up," replied Tomoyo, sewing yet another costume for Sakura. This outfit was a pale pink silk or satin of what he could see—Tomoyo wouldn't let Eriol see it yet.
"Sorry," he said meekly.
"Is there any reason why you guys are sitting in the playground?" asked a silky voice. Spinel.
"Well, Eriol's secret lair underneath my bedroom balcony is currently out-of-order, so this was our only other place to go," stated Tomoyo in a very matter-of-fact tone.
Spinel had nothing to say, so he just flew off, shaking his head and muttering about insane mortal female teenagers who had an odd sense of humor called sarcasm.
"Cute animal, that Suppi."
"WHO'S SUPPI?!" yelled a far away voice. Tomoyo giggled, and stabbed the needle into the cloth.
A smirk curved Eriol's lips. "It's time to call out the heavy-duty army—the M.S's."
"You've got to be kidding me!" Tomoyo gasped. "Syaoran will hate you forever!! Not to mention, Sakura." she added as an afterthought.
"No he won't." Eriol replied calmly. "And he hates me as it is. But I don't mind. My job shall be far more easier if he loathes me."
"But Eriol, the M.S's? Are you insane?"
"Do you need to know an answer to that? But yes, I am."
"Well you had me fooled."
~*~
[A/N: confused yet? Goggled enough as it is? Well, honey, you ain't seen nothin' yet. ]
"Ha-RRY!" screeched Hermione, hair flying out behind her as they dashed along the corridor. "Where are we going?!"
[A/N: to the bedroom! Hahhaha, I think not, I'm sorry]
"I felt an immensely dark power from over here," he replied, and took out his wand. "ALOHOMORA!" he roared, and the door flew open.
Two figures inside the room spun around, and Harry felt faint.
"D-dad?"
~*~
SYAORAN
Sakura was lying in my arms, when she stirred, and yawned widely, eyelids fluttering open.
Then she scrambled out of my lap, and started hacking violently. Every one stopped and stared at Sakura, who was coughing up a storm.
"BLEAAARGh!" something popped out of her mouth, and landed in her hand, a small fuzzy baby chick.
"OHMIGOD!!!!" She screamed. "I SWALLOWED A CHICKEN! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
It peeped, looking incredibly fazed, then hopped out of her hand.
Then something hit me.
Teenage girls do not, under any circumstances, cough up baby birds.
"SAKURA," I yelled. "IT'S A CARD!"
"Yeah, well, WHAT THE HELL WAS IT DOING LODGED IN MY THROAT, HUH!?"
"Er…"
"Whatever," she sighed, slightly put out. She chanted the call, and then accidentally ended up hitting the chicken on the head, knocking it out, but sealed it.
She stared at the pink card in her hand. "The…Dance Card? Whatever…Hey, it was transformed already," she said, and looked up at me. I shrugged. "I have no idea. Today is turning out to be the weirdest day in a while."
"Too true," she conceded ruefully. "Too true."
~*~
THIRD PERSON
"Dad—dy?" asked Harry, his green eyes growing huge and misty. Hermione put her hand up to her mouth. "Oh my goodness…"
"What in hell?!" the stranger barked, backing away.
The girl turned to him. "Eriol!?"
"Tomoyo—I—"
Harry suddenly turned murderous. "YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR!? YOU'RE ALREADY MARRIED TO MY MUM!"
Tomoyo stared from Harry to Eriol. "You had a child with Kaho?! You're MARRIED!?"
"No!"
"DAD YOU'RE A LOUSY BASTARD!" Harry roared, lunging at Eriol, but Hermione grabbed his sweater, and managed to hold him back, barely.
Tomoyo looked at Eriol, who looked at her.
They said in unison, "Run."
"DAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDY!" squealed Harry, as he saw Eriol and Tomoyo leap out of the window. "I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Eriol landed in a bush, while Tomoyo somersaulted and landed perfectly on her feet, looking pristine as ever.
"Tell me how the hell you do that," Eriol panted as they started running.
"Practice," she said angelically.
"You jump out of windows often?"
"Oh sure, all of the time."
Eriol blinked, then realized that she was being sarcastic. Women. He thought, and shook his head, all too aware of the cries behind him.
"DAAAAAADDY! DADDY!"
They ran faster.
~*~
STILL SYAORAN, SORRY PEOPLES
Sakura turned to me, an odd look on her face. "Do you hear something?"
I raised an eyebrow, and listened.
"Eriol?"
"And Tomoyo!" she cried. "What's going on?!"
And not too far off, we heard the distinct screaming of a "DADDY!!!!"
GOHAN
Panting, Eriol (who had brambles and thorns in his legs, leaves in his hair, and a stick in his pocket) and Tomoyo ran up to Sakura and Syaoran, the two latter having confused but inquiring looks on their faces.
"It's—it's…" started Eriol, but he collapsed. Tomoyo shook her head, and whispered, "Eriol had a child, and now he's chasing us."
"YOU HAD A KID?!" roared Syaoran. "YOU'RE ONLY FIFTEEN!"
Eriol raised his head, irritated. "I didn't, baka descendant. Some random kid who looks like me thinks I'm—"
Just then, a boy with remarkably untidy hair, blazing green eyes ran up, a girl with curly brown locks in tow.
"Dad, how come you ran away?" he asked to Eriol, who was lying on the ground, banging his head against the cement. Then he shifted his gaze to Sakura.
"Mum!?"
Syaoran, who had been very close to Sakura, suddenly blanched, and turned to face her.
"Syaoran!" she snapped. "LOOK AT ME. HELLO, He's… OUR AGE, FOURTEEN AT THE YOUNGEST! THAT MEANS I WOULD HAVE TO BE ONLY ONE YEAR OLD, YOU SICKO! I DON'T KNOW WHO THE HELL HE IS, BUT HE ISN'T MY SON! I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM IN MY ENTIRE FREAKING LIFE!!"
Syaoran blinked. "I never said—"
Tomoyo smirked. "Syaoran's just upset because he thinks that Sakura and Eriol are a couple, that's all."
"WHHAAAAAT?!"
The girl smacked her forehead, rolling her eyes exasperatedly. "Harry, you idiot, that's not your father."
Harry blinked. "Yeah, I know."
She glared. "Then why were you running after him like some prat?! That's a famous wizard!"
It was Eriol's turn to blink. "You know about me? I didn't think…"
"I was being sarcastic, actually."
"…Oh."
"I'm Hermione Granger, and this is Harry Potter." Said the girl, introducing herself and her friend.
"Hi," Sakura waved. "I'm Sakura."
"Hello," Tomoyo smiled. "Call me Tomoyo."
Syaoran nodded, muttering his name, and Eriol bowed and said, "Eriol at your service."
Hermione turned to Harry. "So where are we, anyway?"
"Uh…I don't know."
Hermione's eye twitched. "What?!"
"You're in Tomoeda, Japan." Supplied Sakura cheerfully.
Hermione's jaw dropped. "J-Japan? How are we going to get back to England?!"
//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\//\\
And so ends this chapter of our insanely insane story. J hee, hee, hee. I hate Spell check sometimes. Okay, so I hate it a lot. It says my 'hee's' are not spelled properly. Screw it, I don't care.
So anyway, can't wait for yet another chappie, huh? Well don't worry, my precious-es, another will come. ::rubs hands together:: BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!
Ahem. Just wanted to say thanks so all of you that reviewed, thanks so very much! I love all of the reviews, you LOVE my story, apparently, which is great! Thanks SOO much!
Oh—wondering what the M.S army is, huh? Well take a guess, go on, I'll double dare ya!! ^o^
You might be wondering what has happened to some of the characters. Don't worry, they're all there, you'll see. And why was Harry chasing after Eriol if he knows that he was not his father? (That sounds weird. Um. But yeah, basically…) Will Hermione go crazy? Will we ever have couple fluff? And if Harry and Hermione are there…Ron can't be TOO far behind, can he? ~.^ la, la, la…well, till next time!
