Disclaimer: I wish.

*****

Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?

*****

The man in the shadows raised one strong hand to her. "Beware."

Scully began to draw impatient. "What? What's going on?" she
demanded again. "What do you want me to beware? Give me a hint!"

The background changed around them in flashes of red. The FBI agent
caught glimpses of some of the pictures flashing behind the red:

A vampire.

A streak of something.

A flash of grey.

A person in white--no, silver--no, white--

Another picture. Too fast!

They were coming too fast!

"Noooooooooo!" Scully cried, clamping her hands to her face. "NO!"

And her nose bled on.

*****

Lun@ stretched uneasily. Yesterday's--actually, this morning's--
series of events weighed uncomfortably on her mind. What was she
doing?

Rising from her cot and padding silently to the door, she began to
reason with herself. *Does anyone ever really know what they're
doing? No, of course not! You stumble through life, taking what
is dealt to you, and working it into your own game plan. But...
what's my game plan?*

Outside, near the temple stairs, the girl noticed Mulder working
his calf-muscles in preparation for a run. *He's got the right
idea.* Softly, she approached him. "Going for a jog?"

"Yeah."

"Want some company?"

"Whatever." Not really.

"Okay, good." Becoming the little dog, she stretched, shook, and
stretched again, yawning. "Let's go."

The jog went quietly for a while before Lun@ spoke:

"You're angry at her."

"What are you--"

"Don't be angry. It's a difficult subject."

His voice was fastidiously controlled. "You knew."

"I know a lot of things."

There was another pause as they jogged towards the park. "What
are you?" Mulder finally asked.

"Damned if I know," she replied with the hint of resignation she
couldn't hide. "I don't know if I've ever known...

"I used to be Death."

"Death."

"Death. That's how you know me. Scully was supposed to be one of
my clients, but she... you cheated me. You two cheated death."

Rolling his eyes, the FBI agent played along. "What about all the
times we've courted you?" Mulder asked a bit sarcastically. "Where
were you then?"

"You forgot my flowers. Chocolate. Long walks in the park..."

They ran in silence as they passed another couple joggers.

"So, this jog could be potentially dangerous to my health?"

"Nah... I was fired. Not scary enough... or something."

"I find that hard to believe."

"You're such a flatterer. I'm blushing." They paused for a moment
to catch their wind. "She needs you."

"Death?"

"Scully. More than you need her. If she's your strength, you're
hers. This case... these vampires, they're a problem. You've seen how
Angel looks; those vampires last night were not normal. Staking them
seems to work, but not everybody has arm strength like Buffy, and
I'd really rather not leave it all up to Sailor Moon. These creatures
are a weird dark magic and vampire hybrid, and you guys have seen
strange things before. You're experianced. You are even semi-versed
in demon lore. We need you... So, just kiss and make up or whatever,
'cause this is important."

"Scully and I are just friends. Our relationship is purely
platonic." He fixed her with a hard look.

He had never known a dog's face could look so skeptical.

"So that's what they're calling it these days."

"Look, what Scully and I are is none of your business, okay? So
butt out."

"Touché."

"Bet your ass."

*****

"You're sure this is gonna work?"

"Look, you little pissant, SHUT UP already!" Spike threw his
girlfriend an exasperated look. "Can I eat 'im, love? Please?
'E's so bloody annoying..."

"Look, you, you..." the man sputtered. "You need me!"

"He's probably give you indigestion," Queen Cancerman murmured dryly.
"You're sure about this plan?"

"I already sent the Bots to take care of 'er."

"Excellent."

*****

"Sir, the law says you need to have your dog on a leash." The
policeman narrowed his eyes at Mulder.

"I'm sorry offic--what dog?"

"Why, that dog right--" The officer frowned as he looked for the
grey dog that the man had been jogging with only moments before.
"Where'd he go?"

"I don't own a dog, sir. I was just jogging." Mulder motioned towards
the park when the officer looked like he was going to protest. "May
I continue, sir? I need to be back in time to get to work."

"Carry on, then," the puzzled man told him gruffly, one last
glare an attempt to salvage his wounded pride.

Mulder jogged off, glancing at the girl now at his side. "That was
cruel," he told her mildly.

She shrugged a little. "But handy."

"True," he conceded. "So, tell me a little about being De--"

His inquiry was interrupted by a Giant Robot stepping in front of
them. "Target found."

Mulder and Lun@ exchanged concerned looks.

"Retrival initiated."

"The Hell?!" Lun@ yelped as the robot reached for her. She looked
around at all the bystanders, who stood around, mouths agape.
"Someone, HELP!! Call the police!!"

Delivering a round of painful-sounding kicks and punches to the
machine, she emitted an uncharacteristic squeal of surprise and outrage
as the robot deftly picked her up around the middle.

"Mulder!" she screamed, and he already had his gun out and pointed at
her captor.

"FBI! Let her go!" he hollered before firing. The bullets had about
as much effect as Diab's earlier ringing blows: absolutely nothing.

The creature frowned, however, and turned towards Mulder. "Threat
discovered."

"Oh, shit." Mulder fired again, this time aiming for the "head" of
the robot.

The bullet made a "ping"-ing noise as it glanced off of the shiney
metallic skin. "Eliminate," decided the robot.

"Mulder, run!" Lun@ yelled, squirming. "Go get the senshi!"

Mulder fired at the Robot again. "Release her!"

"Mulder!" Lun@ struggled frantically to trace symbols of power in
the air, but they refused to flow out of her fingertips. "Work,
damn you!" she demanded, almost in tears. But instead, all that
trickled into her hand was that annoying grey rod that she had _sworn_
she had left under her pillow. With only a second glance at it,
she heaved it at Mulder, screaming, "CATCH!!"

He snagged it out of the air as the Robot raised it's arm and fired.
The laser beam shot out straight towards Mulder.

He ducked and rolled, neatly missing the shot. It flew behind him
into a tree, where it hit a tree branch that came crashing down.

Right on his head.

"Threat eliminated."

"MULDER!" Something flashed in Lun@'s eyes, and a bit of Diabolique
began to return to her. *Scully's gonna KILL me...* "Did you
kill him, you hunk of scrap metal?!" She writhed, furious. "You
are SO dead!" Her hands flew up and began to weave the mystical,
deadly signs of short-circut--

--And fell back to her sides as the robot conked her over the
head. "Target sedated."

Witnesses could still see the glint of the early morning sun reflecting
off her Death's Cross, the lone symbol of her previous life, as she was
carried off by the lumbering metal giant.

*****

Scully frowned and looked at her watch again. As usual, Mulder
was late.

Taking another sip of tea, she dialed the number of his cell phone
and impatiently awaited the man's answer. Even Mulder wouldn't leave
without his cell phone--especially not since the re-appearance of her
cancer...

"Hello?" a strange voice answered.

Scully gave her phone a doubtful look, as if it was the cause of this
strange occurance. "Who is this?" *Don't tell me he lost *another*
cell phone...* she prayed.

"I'm Hikaru Tometsu."

"...Is Mulder there? Can I talk to him?"

*****

He was just waking up when she arrived in the hospital. "Mulder!
What happened?!"

"Had a fight."

"The tree won."

"Actually, I think it was the giant robot."

Scully raised her ever-ready "Skeptical Eyebrow", reserved for all
such fantastic situations. "I think you hit your head harder than
we thought."

"This is going to sound strange--"

"Mulder, it already does."

"Then you're never gonna believe that we were just jogging along,
minding our own business, when--"

The question of "we" was on the tip of the red head's tongue when
Buffy poked her head in the door. "I'm sorry to bother you, Agent
Mulder, but have you seen Lun@? Nobody's seen her all morning."

He sighed and let his head fall back to his pillow. "I guess that
answers that question."

"Which?"

"Whether or not she got away."