The writing of this fic is dedicated to those who wrote "Greatest of the Gods"

The Greatest of the Seishi

Once upon a time in a land called Konan, there was seven Suzaku seishi who were, quite frankly, very bored. So they decided to hold a contest amongst themselves over who was the best seishi of them.

Hotohori: It is clear that I am the best. I don't see why we should take part in such an obvious contest. Narrator: Then I'm sure you wouldn't mind in missing out and judging the remaining six, now would you? Hotohori: ... Narrator: Thankyou. Now AS I was typing...

They decided to hold a contest amongst themselves over who was the best seishi of them. At promptly 9:00 a.m. Hotohori stepped out of his palace and into the courtyard. He was not in his usual emporer's garb because he knew that Tasuki would make fun of him because he was wearing a dress.

Hotohori: What do you mean its a dress!?

Nuriko came next, from under the gate. This was not at all hard for him, because all he had to do was relocate it.

Somewhere in the regions of Sairo... Townsperson: Oi! What's this gate doin' 'ere?

Nuriko: ^^'

Tamahome came next, deep in conversation with Chichiri. Then came Mitsukake who was toting a half-asleep Chiriko.

Chiriko: I *yawn* stayed up reading in the library again.

Soon the only seishi to arrive was none other than Tasuki. They waited. And waited. And waited.

Chiriko: *now fully awake* I'm getting hungry!

Tamahome: I say if he isn't here in ten minutes that we start without him! Others: Okay. Fine by me. ect

Nine minutes later... Tasuki stumbled into the courtyard completely smashed. Mihara had an arm around him, helping him walk.

Mihara: Now Tasuki, what did I tell you about getting drunk? Tasuki: Blehhhh.

Now that all of the seishi had arrived, they came to a problem. They needed a judge. Originally it was to be Mihara, but naturally, the other seishi had their objections.

Tamahome: Not her! You know she'll pick Tasuki! Mihara: Do you have any other suggestions? Tamahome:...Miaka. Tasuki: *suddenly sober* No! You know she'll pick you. Hotohori: But I want to see her again. Nuriko: Remember last time they were together, though?

Scene: Bus Trip Part 1 Miaka: Tamahome. Tamahome: Miaka. Miaka: Tamhome. Tamahome: Miaka.

Tamahome: ^^'. Did I really do that. All others: Yessss!

Chiriko: Wait, I've got a great idea! Why don't we call Ichidou from Kutou to judge us. She likes us all evenly. Chichiri: Great idea Chiriko!

So word was sent to Kutou to have Ichidou come to Konan. They waited. And waited. And waited. And waited some more. Finally around noon Ichidou rode in where the gate was supposed to be, with Amiboshi and Suboshi close behind.

Ichidou: Okay! Let's get this party started! All others: *glare* Ichidou: ^^'. I'm guessing I'm late.

Now that they had their judge they were ready to start. But as always with the Suzaku Sichiseishi, as soon as one problem is solved, another arises. This time it was the question of who should go first.

Tamahome: I should because I was the first Seishi to be introduced in the original story. Hotohori: I should because I'm emporer. Nuriko: I should because I'm strongest. Chichiri: I should because I have the coolest powers. Chiriko: I should because I'm the youngest. Mitsukake:...Age before bueaty. Hotohori:Oi! Are you saying you don't want me to go first!? Tasuki: I should because I say so.

So the Narrator picked Hotohori because she knew if she picked Tasuki the others would claim favoritism.

Hotohori: I am the best seishi because I have my own country. I have skills in swordsmanship and many have thought me to be the nobelest character in the series.

Tamahome: Well, I am the best because, aforementioned I was the first one to be introduced in the original series. And my martial arts powers are popular in several animes such as Street Fighter, Dragon Ball Z, Ranma 1/2, ect.

Nuriko: You may have martial arts powers, Tama-chan, but I have brute stength. AND ageless bueaty. Plus I have the most tragic past.

Chichiri: I have the most tragic past. I am the best because I am incredibly bishounen and I have the coolest powers.

Tasuki: Feh! Those may be good reasons, but listen to mine! I have two powers: inhuman speed and fire, which is the element of our guardian god, Suzaku. I've been the leader of a gang of infamous bandits. I actually have a girlfriend in this story. AND I was the first of the Seishi to get laid.

Mihara: BAKA! *smacks him in the back of the head*

Chiriko: I am the best because I am the smartest, and the cutest.

Hotohori: But! But! But you look like a girl! Narrator: And you don't? Now be quiet or else you get disqualified.

Chiriko: Thankyou Narrator-sama. Now as I was saying. I am smartest and cutest. Plus I saved everyone from Miboshi, thus proving me noble as well.

Mitsukake: I'm the best because I can heal people. Others: And? Mitsukake: And that's it. Others:....

So everyone looked at Ichidou who was deeping in conversation with Amiboshi and Suboshi.

Narrator: Ahem. Ichidou: Oh sorry. I was consulting with the other judges. Hold on while we make our final descision.

So they waited. And waited. And waited some more.

Narrator: *warningly* Ichidou. Ichidou. The judges have concluded that because Seiryuu had the best seishi AND the best miko it is pointless to hold a contest for Suzaku. Goodbye.

And with that she rode away, Amiboshi and Suboshi following.

Narrator: *sigh* I don't know why I bother.

The End

Well? What do you think. It was sitting in my sister's hard drive since like april so I decided to put it up. Well what are you waiting for? REVIEW!