Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I stole them for the day and ripped off a 'Toys R Us' store... got a problem? You wanna sue me? Go for it. E-mail I_want_to_sue@yahoo.com and you can pretend you made a difference?
Rated: I don't know, if you can watch the show you can read this!
Skit #New: Weapons 'R' Us
By: ~Delenn~
Created on 11/28/2001 3:17 PM
Xena: Gabrielle, I need more weapons... I mean have you LOOKED at the shape of my sword lately? It's been split in half more times then I can count, and it can only miraculously come back together so many times!
Gabrielle, eyeing her frying pan: Don't you use enough creative weapons, Xena? Besides, I need more scrolls.
Xena, annoyed but resigned: Without weapons you wouldn't have anything to write about!
Gabrielle, indignantly: That's not TRUE!
A black envelope appears on Xena's lap, she jumps in surprise: What the h-- I mean 'what in tartarus!'
Gabrielle casually picked up the envelope and tosses it to Xena: Here, you open it!
Xena, suspicious: Why can't you?
Gabrielle, rolling her eyes: Duh, you're the strong one; it can't do THAT much damage to you!
Xena, opening the envelope: Thanks for the vote of confidence. (She reads silently for a moment, and then her eyes get really wide) Ooh, Gabrielle look, look at this!
Gabrielle takes the parchment and reads it out loud: This gift certificate to 'Weapons R Us' is presented to one 'Xena' for the amount of '1 million dinars' for her to spend on 'anything she likes'.
The sender of this certificate '________' would like to remain anonymous until the time of purchase.
Gabrielle looks at Xena, the warrior practically jumping in excitement: Ya wanna go now?
Xena, eagerly: Yes, yes, yes!!
SOME HOURS LATER AT THE ENTRANCE TO 'Weapons R us':
Gabrielle, with Xena, staring rather disgustedly at the millions of weapons: Ugh, Xena, why don't you want to go to a nice scroll store like NORMAL people??
Xena, who has already started to dash off in the direction of the nearest weapons shelf: Relax Gabrielle, this won't take long. C'mon, it'll be FUN! I mean with this much money; I could buy TONS of stuff!
TWO DAYS LATER, ENTERING THE CAMPSITE:
Xena, lugging a good ten bags of weapons, followed by Argo carrying a good stack more, and Gabrielle grumpily carrying two new sias and a sword: I still don't see why you need so many weapons Xena!
Xena, setting down the bags and happily digging through them: It was a gift certificate, what was I supposed to do? Besides, if never hurts to be prepared!
Gabrielle, annoyedly: Which brings me to who gave you that certificate! How could you buy ANYTHING with money from Ares??
Xena, shrugging: I'd already schlepted all that stuff to the checkout! Besides, I gave you 100 dinars out of the certificate, and you spent them on that sword and new sias!
Gabrielle, muttering , still annoyed: Fine, can we just get some sleep? I can't believe we spent two days looking at weapons! (Louder) We're visiting a scroll shop tomorrow!
Xena, sarcastically: Joy.
The End
Rated: I don't know, if you can watch the show you can read this!
By: ~Delenn~
Created on 11/28/2001 3:17 PM
Xena: Gabrielle, I need more weapons... I mean have you LOOKED at the shape of my sword lately? It's been split in half more times then I can count, and it can only miraculously come back together so many times!
Gabrielle, eyeing her frying pan: Don't you use enough creative weapons, Xena? Besides, I need more scrolls.
Xena, annoyed but resigned: Without weapons you wouldn't have anything to write about!
Gabrielle, indignantly: That's not TRUE!
A black envelope appears on Xena's lap, she jumps in surprise: What the h-- I mean 'what in tartarus!'
Gabrielle casually picked up the envelope and tosses it to Xena: Here, you open it!
Xena, suspicious: Why can't you?
Gabrielle, rolling her eyes: Duh, you're the strong one; it can't do THAT much damage to you!
Xena, opening the envelope: Thanks for the vote of confidence. (She reads silently for a moment, and then her eyes get really wide) Ooh, Gabrielle look, look at this!
Gabrielle takes the parchment and reads it out loud: This gift certificate to 'Weapons R Us' is presented to one 'Xena' for the amount of '1 million dinars' for her to spend on 'anything she likes'.
The sender of this certificate '________' would like to remain anonymous until the time of purchase.
Gabrielle looks at Xena, the warrior practically jumping in excitement: Ya wanna go now?
Xena, eagerly: Yes, yes, yes!!
Gabrielle, with Xena, staring rather disgustedly at the millions of weapons: Ugh, Xena, why don't you want to go to a nice scroll store like NORMAL people??
Xena, who has already started to dash off in the direction of the nearest weapons shelf: Relax Gabrielle, this won't take long. C'mon, it'll be FUN! I mean with this much money; I could buy TONS of stuff!
Xena, lugging a good ten bags of weapons, followed by Argo carrying a good stack more, and Gabrielle grumpily carrying two new sias and a sword: I still don't see why you need so many weapons Xena!
Xena, setting down the bags and happily digging through them: It was a gift certificate, what was I supposed to do? Besides, if never hurts to be prepared!
Gabrielle, annoyedly: Which brings me to who gave you that certificate! How could you buy ANYTHING with money from Ares??
Xena, shrugging: I'd already schlepted all that stuff to the checkout! Besides, I gave you 100 dinars out of the certificate, and you spent them on that sword and new sias!
Gabrielle, muttering , still annoyed: Fine, can we just get some sleep? I can't believe we spent two days looking at weapons! (Louder) We're visiting a scroll shop tomorrow!
Xena, sarcastically: Joy.
