Author's Note: I'm very sorry if I've offended anyone yet. I've tried to make the characterizations as inoffensive as possible without losing the original plot.

~*~*~*~*~*Meetings, Minglings, and Manglings*~*~*~*~*~

Fore'ize babbled on happily. "Oh, yes, then you apply the dead-white makeup. Of course, it's not black, but sometimes we must sacrifice for style, you know. No, no, no, honey, that's not at all it. The white is to /remove/ all appearance of life, not to accent it! Tsk tsk. I really don't know what to do with you Lightsworn. All this about Light.....and the Creator.....and color." He shuddered. As he raised his eyelash curler to put the final touches on his latest makeover-ee, he froze. ((Hey, just because he doesn't have eyes is no reason he can't carry all the accessories!))

There, across the room was the man he had been waiting for all his life. The long white cloak, the handsome face....could it be?

"DADDY!!" He flashed in and out of the shadows between them, startling quite a few Cairhienen women wearing massive hoop skirts. The things cast wonderful shadows, you see. "Lightsworn," he muttered.

Mat watched him flit from skirt to skirt, fascinated. This Myrddraal's ability was.....intriguing. A definite reason to switch to the Shadow.

But our belovedly (possibly alternatively-lifestyled, but we won't hold it against him if he is) comic relief failed to notice him. His Eyeless gaze was fixed on the man he'd just barely glimpsed in between a small country's population of women hanging around him. And he's ignoring them all, Fore'ize thought fondly, he's my father indeed. A tear fell from his.......wait, hold on.....this isn't right.....

((author ponders))

A tear fell from his..... his ahm.......erm........umm......

And he......he felt a.......a.......

We'll come back to this later......

Back at the podium, Rand grinned. "See, Bilbo, I told you this would work. They're happy now! Look!"

Perrin turned slowly toward his friend. "Bilbo? I, ah, that is......." eyeing Rand nervously, he scanned the audience. "Oh Faile, my darling duck of desire ((name that quote!)) , I would /love/ to meet your mother! Such a charming lady, if she raised a girl like you!"

Rand nodded sadly, "Yes, run, Bilbo, run. It's me THEY're after, not you. It's me THEY want, and I must find THEM. For THEY hold the key to all the questions you could ever imagine, all the questions you've ever wondered. THEY know, and THEY're watching.... always watching....always....from the highest levels, THEY watch"

Suddenly he ran screaming out of the room as it hit him that he /was/ the highest level. Min, Aviendha, and Elayne laughed affectionately, "Must be that good ol' taint again."

((Ah! I got it! It's all so clear to me!!))

Fore'ize bit his lip courageously, trying not to cry. "Oh, daddy, daddy, you found me! After all these years! The searching, the endless searching...." he sniffled. "But, daddy, if you're....you know....differently oriented--and the Shadow is very accepting of that sort of thing nowadays...how did you....ahm, ah..."

The man in white stared with a catlike grace at the Myrdraal and blushed a blush to rival a thousand sunsets. "Oh, um, hello, there. Could I interest you in the Light, or, or..." he trailed off. So, that wild night in Fal Dara had finally caught up with him. He really thought she was just wearing a mask! How was he supposed to know she really /was/ a Trolloc? He had just been trying to fit in, after all.

"The Light? Oh daddy, you're so funny. I see where I get my sense of humor from. And my good looks," he added slyly.

A beautiful young woman with a neckline that reached nearly to her knees sighed at the... whatever it was. She perked up when she heard the voice, though. So whatever he is, he's male then. "Hey, good-looking, I love you so much that I would cut off every limb of my body, put them through a shredder, eat them, regurgitate them, eat them again, then digest them, then eat them again, then regurgitate them and wrap them up for a present and give them to you for our 1 week anniversary just because I love you sooooooo much!!!!!"

((okay, so i got that one from ecrush.com. They stalk me.))

The Fade backed away slowly. "I, um, er..."

Berelain pouted, slightly misunderstanding the situation. Another one?! She had never before had to compete /with/ a guy /for/ a guy. Could this be some new fad? Or could it be that she was simply getting ugly? Were men finally seeing through her irresistable exterior to her cold, power-hungry, loveless interior?? She nearly burst into tears as she ran from the two. "Faile, oh, Faile, is that your mother I see with you? Oh, I simply must meet her if she's anything like you."

The Whitecloak sniffed and twitched his cloak. "Well, that was rude. So... you're the Trolloc's son. You know, I can't see much of her in you, or really much of me. Are you sure that...?" he cut off with a fluidity almost too pretty for a man.

"Oh yes, yes, definintely. Mother gave me this locket before she left." Taking a black metal chain from around his neck, he opened the tiny locket shaped like a heart. Not the happy sweet kind. An actual heart. "It's obviously you. See?"

The man squinted with a motion that would've gotten him Bonded at any other moment and nodded, "That is indeed my likeness. Then I suppose you really are my.....my, uh, my son."

Foariez nodded excitedly, "Oh yes, yes, I am. For sure, I am." Casting a searching..... um....gaze around the room, he giggled. "Oooh, daddy, how about some friendly competition? See that sexy man over there? We will see who gets to take him to the Pit tonight, if you know what I mean,"

Spying the older man with the tilted eyes and mustache, the Whitecloack nodded. "Deal," he said as he grinned wickedly. "Let's go." He had never dreamed that he would find someone who understood him the way this Myddraal did or that he would ever find fatherhood so rewarding. The moral delicacies usually involved when one fathers a Shadowspawn would have to be pondered another day.

Sure enough, three minutes later, a Saldeaen man ran screaming through the crowd. "Faile, dear, I think we need to catch up on our quality time together. Oh yes, and you too, darling wife. Some real quality time. Some LONG quality time." Sparing a glance back at the two frowning back at him, the man shuddered. He had truly never thought that Galad swung that way. And as for the Shadowspawn.....he had guarded the Blight for many years, and nothing had been as terrifying as that Fade's offer. He wasn't quite sure what "going to the Pit" meant, but, like with Juilin's figs and mice, that didn't matter. He was terrified and knew this would result in devastating emotional trauma. No sleeping without a nightlight for years.

Meanwhile, Faile and her mother where the happiest that they had ever been. They jumped and shrieked and giggled and hugged each other. "Ooh, we're so popular! They like us. They really like us!"