A/N: So. Lafi kinda disappeared and left me with an unfinished fic. Great.
So here I am to finish it, and hopefully by the end, Lafi will show up. I
hope that I can still write a fic that you guys love so much, and since you
all want it so badly. I'll try to shorten the bits from now until the
Council of Elrond.
"A sna- er, wizard is never late"
"WwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeELLLLLLLLLLLLL yyOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooouuuuuuuuu WWWWWWWWeEEEEEErrrrrrrrrrEEEEEE!!!"
"No, I arrived precisely when I meant to!"
Frodo started laughing. Gandalf couldn't stand for this so he stretched out his neck and when Frodo came round to his side of the tree, he bit. But Frodo was too fast. Gandalf decided that he was too little anyway and continued on his way to ea- er, see Bilbo.
"Hey, wait for MMMMEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!"
Frodo was running after Gandalf, so Gandalf went a little faster. Frodo eventully gave up when he saw an especially large nut laying on the ground just off the road.
As Gandalf went, he saw many more squirrels that were jabbering and eating nuts. When they saw him, every last one screamed in a squeaky voice and ran into their homes as fast as they could; which wasn't very fast because it wasn't very easy trying to reach the doorknob.
Gandalf finally reached Bilbo's huge place. He rolled his eyes at the "No lawyers" sign on the gate. Gandalf awkwardly gripped his staff with his tail and knocked on the door.
"If you are a lawyer, I'm not home!"
"Bah, come out you fluffy little squirrel! I have many papers for you to sign!"
"Ack! I told you that I'm not home, lawyer!"
"I'm not a lawyer, I'm Gandalf. I was just pulling your tail."
"Ack! Not my tail!"
"Not literally, you fat little idiot!"
The door opens and Gandalf sees a gray and very scruffy looking squirrel. He's not very hungry any more.
"Well then, come in old friend!"
"Who are you calling old? You've aged so much since I last saw you!"
Gandalf slithers in and grimaces. He sniffs the air. Bilbo smiles.
"What, does my house smell like old people?"
Gandalf glances at Bilbo.
"No. Bilbo, have you been having bladder problems?"
Bilbo looks nervous, but then starts running around like a maniac claiming to look for food for them to eat.
"But if you're having bladder problems, you shouldn't eat every chance you get, should you?"
Bilbo glares at Gandalf and then runs around some more.
"Would you like some mashed nuts?"
"Bilbo, is that a threat?"
"No, of course not!"
Bilbo shows Gandalf a jar full of a strange brownish stuff. Gandalf looks disgusted.
"That looks like shit! Is that the stuff I'm smelling? So you don't have bladder problems after all."
"I DON'T EAT SHIT! This is literally mashed nuts! They're very delicious and very good for digestion. My bladder has very little problems with this stuff."
Gandalf looks at Bilbo oddly.
"Er. not that I ever had any bladder problems!"
Gandalf looks doubtful. Bilbo sighed.
"Well, do you want any?"
"No thanks. No matter how delicious you say it is, it still looks like shit."
Bilbo opens the jar and shoves some in his mouth.
"You don't mind if I do, do you?"
"No, not really. As long as those aren't actual nuts."
"But they are!"
"Eru, Bilbo, no! What's gotten into you? You can't just go around stealing guys' nuts and smashing them so you can eat them later!"
"Why do you keep assuming that I mean guys' nuts rather than plants' nuts?"
"Plants have nuts??? Well, I guess Ents might."
"No! Seeds, Gandalf, seeds!"
"Seeds? This is just getting worse and worse. So there's seeds in the nuts? I suppose that's expected."
"Gah!!! I mean like walnuts!"
"Since when do walls have nuts?"
"You're going to give me a heart attack. I should go on a holiday."
"Why not Rivendell? They have many handsome nuts there."
Bilbo looks excited.
"Really? Any almonds?"
Gandalf snorts.
"Maybe."
"Mmmm. I love almonds! My favorite nuts are almonds!"
"So, do you mean almond colored nuts?"
"Arg! Why do you have such a perverted mind, Gandalf?"
"The authors are two teenage girls."
"All they think of is nuts?"
A/N: Actually, we think of other things also. ^_^ Yay, guess what??? About half-way through Lafi showed up and helped me out a bit.
Lafi: Bit.
Tafi: OK, you did half of the work. I had horrible writer's block and then you came and helped out.
Lafi: Yeah, you needed me to come in and giggle when I saw "mashed nuts"
Tafi: Yes. What would I have done? But I continued with it, thus probably boring the readers. Oh well.
~*Lafi&Tafi*~
Jade: Sorry it took all day to post, but I told you I had writer's block. Then we went shopping, then ate dinner, then more shopping. I got the kewlest shoes!!! But I'm truly sorry this took so long. You really did seem to need a laugh. Of course. assuming this made you laugh. Hope it did! ~*Tafi*~
"A sna- er, wizard is never late"
"WwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeELLLLLLLLLLLLL yyOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooouuuuuuuuu WWWWWWWWeEEEEEErrrrrrrrrrEEEEEE!!!"
"No, I arrived precisely when I meant to!"
Frodo started laughing. Gandalf couldn't stand for this so he stretched out his neck and when Frodo came round to his side of the tree, he bit. But Frodo was too fast. Gandalf decided that he was too little anyway and continued on his way to ea- er, see Bilbo.
"Hey, wait for MMMMEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!"
Frodo was running after Gandalf, so Gandalf went a little faster. Frodo eventully gave up when he saw an especially large nut laying on the ground just off the road.
As Gandalf went, he saw many more squirrels that were jabbering and eating nuts. When they saw him, every last one screamed in a squeaky voice and ran into their homes as fast as they could; which wasn't very fast because it wasn't very easy trying to reach the doorknob.
Gandalf finally reached Bilbo's huge place. He rolled his eyes at the "No lawyers" sign on the gate. Gandalf awkwardly gripped his staff with his tail and knocked on the door.
"If you are a lawyer, I'm not home!"
"Bah, come out you fluffy little squirrel! I have many papers for you to sign!"
"Ack! I told you that I'm not home, lawyer!"
"I'm not a lawyer, I'm Gandalf. I was just pulling your tail."
"Ack! Not my tail!"
"Not literally, you fat little idiot!"
The door opens and Gandalf sees a gray and very scruffy looking squirrel. He's not very hungry any more.
"Well then, come in old friend!"
"Who are you calling old? You've aged so much since I last saw you!"
Gandalf slithers in and grimaces. He sniffs the air. Bilbo smiles.
"What, does my house smell like old people?"
Gandalf glances at Bilbo.
"No. Bilbo, have you been having bladder problems?"
Bilbo looks nervous, but then starts running around like a maniac claiming to look for food for them to eat.
"But if you're having bladder problems, you shouldn't eat every chance you get, should you?"
Bilbo glares at Gandalf and then runs around some more.
"Would you like some mashed nuts?"
"Bilbo, is that a threat?"
"No, of course not!"
Bilbo shows Gandalf a jar full of a strange brownish stuff. Gandalf looks disgusted.
"That looks like shit! Is that the stuff I'm smelling? So you don't have bladder problems after all."
"I DON'T EAT SHIT! This is literally mashed nuts! They're very delicious and very good for digestion. My bladder has very little problems with this stuff."
Gandalf looks at Bilbo oddly.
"Er. not that I ever had any bladder problems!"
Gandalf looks doubtful. Bilbo sighed.
"Well, do you want any?"
"No thanks. No matter how delicious you say it is, it still looks like shit."
Bilbo opens the jar and shoves some in his mouth.
"You don't mind if I do, do you?"
"No, not really. As long as those aren't actual nuts."
"But they are!"
"Eru, Bilbo, no! What's gotten into you? You can't just go around stealing guys' nuts and smashing them so you can eat them later!"
"Why do you keep assuming that I mean guys' nuts rather than plants' nuts?"
"Plants have nuts??? Well, I guess Ents might."
"No! Seeds, Gandalf, seeds!"
"Seeds? This is just getting worse and worse. So there's seeds in the nuts? I suppose that's expected."
"Gah!!! I mean like walnuts!"
"Since when do walls have nuts?"
"You're going to give me a heart attack. I should go on a holiday."
"Why not Rivendell? They have many handsome nuts there."
Bilbo looks excited.
"Really? Any almonds?"
Gandalf snorts.
"Maybe."
"Mmmm. I love almonds! My favorite nuts are almonds!"
"So, do you mean almond colored nuts?"
"Arg! Why do you have such a perverted mind, Gandalf?"
"The authors are two teenage girls."
"All they think of is nuts?"
A/N: Actually, we think of other things also. ^_^ Yay, guess what??? About half-way through Lafi showed up and helped me out a bit.
Lafi: Bit.
Tafi: OK, you did half of the work. I had horrible writer's block and then you came and helped out.
Lafi: Yeah, you needed me to come in and giggle when I saw "mashed nuts"
Tafi: Yes. What would I have done? But I continued with it, thus probably boring the readers. Oh well.
~*Lafi&Tafi*~
Jade: Sorry it took all day to post, but I told you I had writer's block. Then we went shopping, then ate dinner, then more shopping. I got the kewlest shoes!!! But I'm truly sorry this took so long. You really did seem to need a laugh. Of course. assuming this made you laugh. Hope it did! ~*Tafi*~
