Just Friends

By: Jessica R Vance

Rating: G. Pure mush.

Summary: Mungojerrie's sick of the rumors that are floating around about him and Rumpleteazer. He grumbles. He moans. He has an epiphany.

Disclaimer: Eat my socks!

~*~

It's always the same thing.

"Hey, there's Jerrie! When are you and Teazer gonna get together, eh?"

Why can't they accept that fact that Teazer and I have absolutely no romantic interest in each other at all? We're the best friends this good old world has ever seen, sure, but... mates? I don't think so.

Sure, she's pretty. I've noticed. Who hasn't? In fact, she's very pretty. But so is Bombalurina. And that doesn't mean I want *her* for a mate. Sure, she's fun to be around. Obviously, else I wouldn't be her best friend! But so is Carbucketty. And that *obviously* doesn't mean I want him for a mate.

I love her, of course. Not that I'd be caught dead saying that around anyone; they'd take it so far the wrong way I'd never be able to find it again. I wouldn't even say it to *her* for fear she'd do the same thing. But I do love her.

It's that kind of love that's not quite as romantic as a mate, but not quite so platonic as a sister. Like... ah, hard to explain. Just like a friend, you know? Someone I could spend the rest of my life with without ever becoming... involved.

Sure, I've thought about it. Quite a bit, actually. It's hard not to, what with their constant heckling. So the thought has crossed my mind, "What if Teazer and I actually *were* mates? What would it be like?"

I've never really come up with an answer. Seems like it might be all right, having someone to cuddle up next to every night, someone to kiss good morning. Especially if it was someone like Teazer. She's a great girl. I wouldn't mind having her for a mate, really.

Of course, we'd have to be attracted to each other like that first... which we're not, as I've said.

Have we ever kissed? Well... yeah, a few times, but it wasn't anything serious. Just a peck here and there, now and then. ... All right, she gives me a little smacker just about every day, but like I said, it's nothing serious. She doesn't mean anything by it.

... You know, or she would have said something by now.

I mean, she's had plenty of opportunities to say something if she wanted to. We've had late-night walks that could have been very romantic if she wanted them to be. So if she's ever wanted to be with me, she could have had me more than once.

We've been seen curled up together plenty of times, too. She's gotten the same kind of irritation I have about us. So she knows what people think. So if she ever wanted to tell me, "You know, Jerrie, I wouldn't mind being your mate," she always could. Wouldn't come as a shock to me.

Well, yes it would. Because she doesn't think of me like that. Like I've said.

I just get so tired of their comments. Even if I *did* want to be Teazer's mate (which I don't, keep that in mind), I probably wouldn't ask her, because of all the talk we'd get. If we get trash now, I can only *imagine* what it would be like if we ever *did* fall in love.

Why do they call it falling, anyway? Does it hurt?

It doesn't seem like it should. Shouldn't it be nice? Maybe it's like falling onto a cloud. Like swimming in fluffy water.

... Not that I'd know or anything.

Maybe cotton candy.

I've gone off the subject, haven't I?

I was talking about the others. Why can't they mind their own business? Do I go on and on about *their* love lives? Do I bother them about *their* mates? Do I go up to Victoria and tell her how *awfully cute* she and Plato are? Do I tell Mistoffelees how much I envy him and Jemima when I see them together?

Of course not. So why can't they leave me alone?

Yes. So anyway, Rumpleteazer and I grew up together. It's really hard to see someone as a mate when that happens, you know? You know everything about them. You know what they like (everything you do) and what they don't (everything you don't) and they know everything about you, too. You start to feel like soulmates or something.

Did I say soulmates? I meant siblings. Oops.

But I already said the thing about how I don't think of Teazer as a sister. Just a sister-type friend. Or a mother. Probably a mother most of the time, seeing as how she's always fretting and worried about me. Always keeping me away from the other queens too, just like a mum.

When I told Munkustrap about this, he chuckled and said something like, "Or just like a jealous queen, maybe?" That was confusing. What would Teazer be jealous of? If she loved me like *that* I might be able to understand it, but there's nothing for her to be jealous of. She just doesn't want me to be hurt. Not that she has to worry; there really isn't another queen I'd be interested in.

... And by saying another, I don't mean "Besides Rumpleteazer." Didn't say that.

Yeah, so... that's that. She doesn't love me, I don't love her, and everybody's happy. Except for everyone else. They won't be satisfied until we've got a litter under our belts. And even then, I'm sure we'd get the normal chorus of "ooooo"s and "aaaawwww"s anywhere we went. Just like we do now. Even though we're not even mates now.

... Maybe we should just go for it. What have we got to lose, anyway? I mean, we're such good friends, it wouldn't mess anything up, would it? Would it get weird?

No weirder than it is now, I don't think. I mean, what would be different? We'd be official mates, that's all.

... We'd be MATES.

Just thinking about that makes me go all funny. My knees get weak and my head starts swimming and my eyes go all fuzzy. I think it's because the thought just appalls me.

Or maybe not.

... You know what just occurred to me? Maybe I *do* love Rumpleteazer... you know, like that. Maybe I just don't know it yet. Or maybe I've just figured it out.

Heeeeeeeey... a lot of things are coming together now!

Maybe she loves me too! That's why she doesn't want me around the other queens so much! And that's why she kisses me, and why she gave me that funny look the other day! And why she gets all blushy when the toms whistle at us.

I think I've figured it out!

... I gotta go find Teazer. She'll love this!

~Fin~