Ch.2

Three weeks later Buffy's bathroom:

Buffy leaned back into the tub, her hair was up in a ponytail that in her opinion made her look like a character from a Dr. Seuss book. If there was one major drawback to short hair, that was it, the inability to just toss her hair up like she had always been able to do. She didn't care though, it wasn't as if anyone was going to see her. This was Buffy time, everyone was out of the house and it was just her and her bubbles. With that thought she lifted up a handful of them and watched them pop slowly, she then proceeded to blow them out across the water. She smiled and wondered how she could have forgotten the simple beauties and joy the world had to offer.

Her brief lapse into madness caused by that disgusting demon was over and done with, but she didn't regret it. She may have almost killed everyone she loved, but she knew that they forgave her fully and they took as much pleasure in her new love of life as she did. No one ever mentioned it though, sometimes it seemed as if it had never happened. But she knew it had and she could still remember how badly she had wanted that other life to be what was real.

She spent a lot of time thinking lately about her life before Sunnydale, her real life, not the memories that the monks had created including Dawn. She felt bad even thinking about them, so bad that she would never be able to tell anyone about them. The memories of just her, her mom and her dad, she wondered how their marriage fell apart so quickly after her problems had started. Their marriage, their love for each other, their love for her had been so strong, she had never doubted her father's love for her a single time until the divorce. Tears started to fall from her eyes and down her cheeks.

"Come on Buffy, get yourself together. That's your past, you can't do anything about it." She said to herself and wiped her tears. That was when she heard him

"I miss you so much." She knew that voice it was Angel's voice

"Angel?" she said turning looking for him, but she was alone in the room. "Angel" she repeated again, once again no answer

"Why won't you come back to me baby?" the voice continued to ask in it's soft murmured tones. "Why did I leave you to get this goddamn medicine that doesn't even work? I should have been here with you. I leave you once in six years and you choose then to wake up for real. God baby, please be strong. Fight them. Come back to me."

Buffy knew now that there was no one in the room with her, no one anywhere in the house, the voice, Angel's voice was coming from inside her head. "Angel" she whispered softly, but the voice did not hear her

"I don't want to wear these on my neck anymore. I want them on our fingers. Maybe we never got up in front of our entire family and pledged our love to each other, but we pledged it to each other and before God. In heaven's eyes and my own we are married. I'm going to put your wedding ring on, I want you to be able to feel it always, even when I'm not with you. Feel the circle, infinity Buffy, that's how long our love is going to last. It's forever. I, Liam take you to be my wife forever." Buffy looked at her hands as she heard the voice in her mind, as the word forever was said, she had a brief flash of a platinum band appearing on her finger, but it was gone as quickly as it came, but the voice went on "I'm not going to give up on us. I love you."

"I love you too" she whispered, kissing her bare finger

"Buffy, baby can you hear me. Buffy? Oh god Buffy please answer me. Please speak."

Buffy couldn't speak she was stunned, but she found her voice in a harsh whisper "Angel?"

"Oh god Buffy can you hear me?"

"Yes"

"Baby, it's not Angel, it's Liam. Liam Buffy, Liam, the flesh and blood man that loves you very much. Please fight, please come back to me."

"Liam?" she knew Liam was Angel's name when he was mortal, but this was making no sense.

"Yes Buffy Liam. Please try to focus. Remember the first time you saw my face, the first time you saw Angel's face, it wasn't in Sunnydale. Where was it?"

"No I only met him here, he'd seen me before but I'd never seen him."

"Yes you did Buffy. Think. There was sunlight."

"There can't be sunlight, he'd die."

"No Buffy please think. Think of his face in the sun. Hear the sounds of traffic around you. Feel the sunlight making you warm. Please think baby."

She heard the desperation in his voice and she couldn't help but try to do something to make it better, so she thought, she tried to picture Angel in the sun. But she couldn't, she couldn't see him in the sun in anywhere but her imagination. "I can't" she said shaking her head in desperation and despair

"Yes you can baby, you can do this you know you can."

That was when she suddenly had a picture flash into her mind. He was laughing and his face was bright and warmed by the sun. He was young and happy and tan. His hair was disheveled. He was sitting on someone and holding a purse. "He was sitting on someone?"

"Yes that's right baby. A guy stole your purse, I saw it happen and I ran after him. You chased after us both. When you caught up I was sitting on him and holding your purse. I was smiling because I saw you, I couldn't believe my luck, you were amazing, but then you left. But we were destined Buffy, you know that. You've made us star crossed lovers in your delusions, but we're always in love, even when you made me a demon, you couldn't kill our love."

She wanted to believe the voice so desperately, but she knew it wasn't real, she needed more of the potion Willow had made. "This isn't real" she said with a shake of her head and the voice stopped.