Learning To Live Again
Revised Edition
Chapter 17, "Inner Struggle"



A\N: I know, its been FOREVER since I last updated, and I'm sorry. My muse just up and left me! :( Is that mean or what? LOL. But really, I hope to get a few new chapters out ASAP for those who have been reading this despite the fact I haven't been updating regularly. "Looking Through Your Eyes" should be updated soon too! :) Please let me know what you think!


"Professor?" Scott looked at the older man in alarm, only a few seconds ago Professor Xavier's face had gone completely blank. Considering that the professor was currently trying to "get in contact" with the comatose Rogue, that couldn't be a good sign. Jean's hand on Scott's shoulder got his attention.
"He's fine Scott. I'm in contact with him right now. Something's definitely not right with her mind, its more of a battle zone than normal."
That was enough to get the attention of 3 men in the room; Remy LeBeau, Bobby Drake, and the man simply known as Logan, but it was the latter who spoke up.
"What's wrong with her Red?" Concern laced his rough voice no matter how hard Logan tried to hide it.
Jean looked to the others, reading the same concern on the faces of Ororo, Hank, and her husband. "I honestly don't know Logan...I'm sorry."
"Ya said her mind was more messed up than usual, what's that supposed t' mean?"
"Rogue is probably one of the hardest people to read, even for the professor. Because of her powers, her mind is generally in a chaotic state as far as the professor and I know. But from what he's telling me right now, she's virtually impossible to reach right now through telepathic means."
"That statement couldn't possibly be truer."
All heads swung to the professor, who during Jean's explination had ended the very mild telepathic contact he had been in with Rogue.
"So in other words, chere ain't reachable by anyone 'ere?"
"I'm afraid not. The only way I've ever been able to really be in telepathic contact with Rogue is if she guided me through her mind or allowed the 'connection'." Charles Xavier looked down at the young woman who had always been the one student he truely couldn't help. Her powers and lack of control were, when he was on too much of a high horse, a subtle reminder even he wasn't all powerful as some believed. "She'll have to get herself through this alone."
In the back of his mind, Professor X could almost swear he heard a soft voice say, "Ah ain't givin' up, don't ya give up on meh."
"Rogue?" He looked at her comatose body in surprise, drawing a wondering look from the others.
"What is it sir?"
"I..." Charles let his voice trail off. Shaking his head he looked up at the face of Scott Summers, "I could've sworn I heard something that's all." Moving his hover-chair towards the door of the med-lab, he looked over his shoulder at his students. "If you'll excuse me."


*Rogue's mind*
"Sinistah, damn you." Rogue's mental form stood, looking around at the havok caused by the loose shadows of those she had absorbed in the past. Sighing, she rubbed her 'hands' together. "Enough chattah gal, ya got a lot o' work ahead. Best get started..."


(A/N: Now I considered ending this chapter there, but I'm not that mean, and all my recent chapters for my stories have been to short by my standards, so, here's some more X-men Fan fic for you to {hopefully} enjoy!)

*1 week later, MedLab*
As Joseph's eyes fluttered open, he was greeted with the rather welcome sight of the MedLab. That meant he had succeeded in keeping most of the X-men safe. Despite a throbing pain in his head, he sat up slowly, looking around for anyone who could get him something to cure his extremely dry throat. Spotting Jean, he sent out a message to her. When she spun in surprise to look at him, he simply gave as much of a smile as he could muster. Hurridly, Jean sent for Hank while getting Joseph a much needed drink of water.
When he could speak again, Joseph looked up at Jean. "How's everyone doing Jean?"
The look on her face was bright, but her eyes let on she was hiding something. "Everyone is fine because of you Joseph. Most of us, myself included, owe you more than we could ever repay."
Suddendly, the big, blue, and extremely brilliant doctor of the X-men, affectionately known as the Beast came rushing into the MedLab and strait to Joseph's side. "Ahh...Good. He's recovering quite nicely."
Jean laughed softly. "It would appear so."
"And exactly how are you feeling Joseph?" Suddenly the excitement of a patient returning to the world of the awake and living was replaced with the calmer, more doctor-like side of the Beast.
"Well...my head feels as if you or Rogue used it as a basketball, but aside from that..."
That was all that needed to be said because immeadiately Hank was rumaging in a cabinet. His search produced a bottle from which he got 2 pills. Handing Joseph another glass of water and the pills, Hank explained the medication at Joseph's curious look. "Basically, that's nothing more than the typical migraine medicine, except its engineered for the mutant metabolism."
Accepting that explination, Joseph downed the two pills and chanced them with the still welcome water. Looking up at Jean, he decided to make sure she wasn't hiding anything. "Jean, tell me the truth. How is everyone?"
Jean and Hank shared a look, as if deciding whether or not to tell him something. But when Jean spoke, it was the last thing he had expected. "Most everyone DID turn out ok Joseph. I had to spend a few days on Muir Island myself, but..."
"Jean...tell me."
"Well, Rogue, she hasn't woken up yet."
"What do you mean 'hasn't woken up yet?'" His tone bordered on aggitated.
Hank took over the subject seeing Jean's reluctance to tell Joseph the truth. "By saying that Rogue hasn't woken up just yet, Jean is trying to say, as gently as possible, that Rogue is currently comatose."
That had Joseph's attention quickly. "What? How?"
Jean spoke again. "We aren't quite sure. Rogue's rather unreadable by most telepaths, includuing the professor, so we can't pinpoint the reason for her comatose state since she suffered no real bodily injuries aside from some slight bruises."
Joseph struggled to get up, only to be held in place by Beast. Casting an icy glare at the doctor, he spoke. "What? I can't go see her?"
"You're under my orders to stay put, and if you try to get out of bed, I'll sedate you again."
"Again?"
"You were under constant sedation while you recovered due to the extent of your injuries and the pain you'd expieriance if concious." Beast decided to continue, but switched the topic back to the Southern Spitfire, Rogue. "The professor, Jean and myself are keeping an eye on Rogue, and have been alerting the team to any changes, you'll receive the same information they do. Rogue has pulled through worse scrapes from what I've heard, so calm down and allow your own body to recover fully."
Joseph didn't like the advice, but knew that if he didn't "calm down," Beast would in fact sedate him again. "Alright, Alright. Just...take care of her."
Jean and Hank both smiled. "I believe if we didn't, there would be a Rajin' Cajun, a stocky Canadian, and more than a dozen others ready to inflict painful damages on myself, Phoenix, and even the professor."
"I don't doubt it in the least..."