Disclaimer: Like before we don't own anything, and we seriously don't want to. The only thing we own is ourselves and our screwed up minds.
Author's Note: OK, if you didn't understand the last part of our last chapter, Bowie is BACK, he's BACK. OK guys?
Chapter 6: Oh God, what did she get herself into THIS time?
"AHHHHHHHHH! IT'S YOU! How did you GET here? You Bastard! I'll KILL you!" screamed Allison, just as she took out her bazooka and fired a few shells at Jareth. As the smoke cleared, the three friends saw a smoky figure. It was JARETH! WHY WON'T HE DIE!
"Now one of you will pay the price for that idiotic attempt at my life." The three friends stood in complete shock, one beside the other with Sarah in the middle. Jareth continued, "So who…will…it…BE? Bachelorette #1? (he points to Jen), Bachelorette #2?(he points to Allison), or…MY personal favourite, the one and only Mouthy Blonde, Bachelorette #3! SARAH!" Sarah- I'm getting tired of this you guys. AND the mouthy blonde crack! Allison- Too bad.
Sarah, Allison and Jennifer looked at each other. Allison and Jen exchanged looks then at once widened their eyes and pointed to Sarah. Sarah jumped at looked at her cough cough FRIENDS! And said, "HEY!….WAIT!…" then she disappeared in a cloud of pink sparkly, girlie smoke before she could yell "YOU SONS OF BITCHES!"
"And as for YOU TWO, you need to make it to my castle if you want your beautiful, charming, sensual "friend" back! Muahahaha!" Sarah- This sucks. Jareth disappeared in the same smoke as Sarah, which wasn't surprising considering he was GAY! Allison- No Offense to gays.
"OH SHIT!" Jen and Allison yelled together.
In Jareth's Castle…
When Sarah finally regained consciousness, she found herself lying on the floor, face down. She stood up quickly and took in her surroundings. She was in the God damn tallest tower in the whole FREAKING castle! "Awww, SHIT!" As if being in Jareth's castle wasn't bad enough Sarah gazed down at her attire. A FRIZZY….POOFIE…PINK…DRESS! "Holy crap! This looks like something from my sister's frickin' Barbie™ collection!" She then raised her hands and felt her head…"OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS? AHHH! HELP ME HELP ME, THERE'S AN ANIMAL ON MY HEAD!" She then, once again, began banging her head against the stone walls of the tower room, yelling like a maniac. Then, she ripped the unknown…thing…and smashed it against the wall. When it fell to the floor, she started stomping on it, when she realised that it was a HUGE ASS crown, encrusted with HUGE ASS diamonds! Sarah bent down and picked up the crown, pulling off the diamonds, and anything that looked remotely valuable. She looked around to see if anyone was looking, then stuffed the jewels down her bra.
Sarah then remembered that she had one of Allison's walkie-talkies. She pulled it out, pressed the talk button and said, "Eagle to nest, Eagle to nest, AH, AH, over!" No one responded. She turned it over and noticed that there were no batteries in it. "What? No batteries? Allison had packed Astronaut food in toothpaste tubes for God's sake."
Sarah looked at the door then started screaming and running towards it. She rammed against it with her shoulder, pushed it, banged her HEAD against it and even kick it a few times. She then fell down to the floor, exhausted and panting. She backed away from the door and suddenly, a gust of wind coming from the outside BLEW the door OPEN! Jen-lol how stupid can she get? "Damn it, I KNEW it was pull!" Sarah said gloomily. She walked through the door and down flights and flights of stairs, eventually coming to the throne room. The room was filled with crazy goblins running around everywhere chasing chickens. She saw Jareth sitting on his throne like a fag and gave him cut eye that even Allison could be proud of. He stood and said in his God DAMN, pansy-ass, I'm sorry mummy, oh I'm so British, accent, "When should the wedding be?"
"Wedding MY ASS!" said Sarah.
"I'm sorry, I didn't hear you, now if you'll excuse me I have traps to set for your friends." Jareth walked out of the throne room like Nearly Headless Nick on the Harry Potter Play Station game. (sorry to those who haven't seen how he walks but he practically dances and prances and flutters his arms around while he walks out…really rent the game just so you can see that…it's hilarious) Sarah was left alone with the Goblins gawking at her. She kneeled down to the now quite goblins and said, "Hey…you guys want to know somethin' man?" The goblins stood there in silence. A few of them looked around at each other. Then she said, "Jareth said that you guys, should bend to my every word…and, he said, that you guys wear panties." The Goblins took great offence to this. Sarah continued, "And, now, I'm like…your Queen…and like we're gonna kill him!" One Goblin broke the silence, "Yeah! She's right! For years, we've been pushed around and forced to laugh at his stupid, gay jokes! Annnd, we've been kicked! Doesn't he know that we have feelings too?" the Goblin's eyes started to tear. All the others agreed with a big cheer. Sarah- heh, we sound like Dr. Seuss!
Sarah stood and screamed, "We'll form a Union!"
"YEAH!"
"And we'll call it the UDG!"
"YEA….huh?" Silence and confused looks followed.
"THE UNION OF DEFIANT GOBLINS!"
"YEAH!" The crowd went wild, shouting and jeering. Then the Goblins started chanting, "SARAH! SARAH! SARAH!"
"LET'S GO MY MINIONS!" They stormed out of the throne room carrying torches, pitchforks and the occasional spear. As Sarah marched through the corridors in the castle, she stopped in front of a huge wooden double doors. She turned around and said, "Behind these doors…"
"Um, Queen Sarah?"
"Shut up! Can't you see I'm talking? Can you say RUDE? OK, so where was I? Oh yes, behind THESE doors, lies our FREEDOM!" As Sarah flung open the doors, crying out in happiness, brooms, mops, buckets, sponges and other cleaning supplies fell on to her. She struggled to get out of the heap of cleaning products. Sarah looked into the "freedom" door and saw something that she would never wish to see. An altar…dedicated to HER! With a statue of her and Jareth kissing. "OH, GODDDDDD! WHAT THE #$! IS THIS?" She ran out of view of the "freedom" room and found herself in front of another set of wooden doors. Soon the Goblins caught up with her. "All right, Behind THIS door lies our Freedom!"
"Uh…" said a Goblin.
"Shh…she might yell at you again!" whispered another Goblin.
Sarah threw open the double doors, yet again, and she realised that this was not freedom, but the kitchen… "All right my Goblin minions. TELL ME. Where…Is…the DAMN EXIT!" The small two-foot Goblin by her side did not speak but pointed to the steel double doors that flashed with a huge fluorescent pink EXIT sign. "Oh…right…ok then…" Sarah said as she looked at the floor dejectedly. "Well then, Behind THIS big fluorescent, flashing door…LIES…OUR…FREEDOM!" Cheers erupted from the Goblins and following Sarah they crashed through the doors with excited yells of "FREEDOM!" And "LONG LIVE THE UNION!"
Author's Note: Ok guys that's the end of the chapter… Next Chapter will be Jen and Allison…aren't you proud of Sarah? She got out of the castle, all by her..s..elf….aw nevermind.
