Ok, brand new torture for ya coming up.
The car broke down, so we are now going on holiday on Sunday, and we're only going for a week. So, don't worry guys, you won't have to wait toooooooooo long.
Btb (ByTheBy), this chapter is better spelt because I actually spellchecked it before posting.
Where was I? OK, I'll just repeat what I said about the guys. This can be like a 'Symptoms' chapter. OMG, I actually said 'like'! And I said OMG! HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahem.
Gimli was in a straight jacket because his insaneness made him believe he was a Moulin Rouge dancer, and he kept trying to do his hair like Christina Aguilara.
Pippin had been eating marshmallows with the Author and now they were both homicidally hyper.
Merry was twirling about in his pink ballerina costume, claiming he was the next Baryshnikov, and no one had the heart to tell him that male ballet dancers don't wear tutus. Or tampons attached to their ears.
Aragorn thought he was a lawyer, and was stalking around everywhere in a long black coat and a powdered wig, but that was ok, because he could apologise for everytime the author overstepped the bounds.
Aragorn broke in, putting on his posh, important voice. "My client wishes me to say that she means no offence by any of her statements, and, if any one DOES take offence, please flame and order her to shove the rating up. She will, because she has a soft spot for kids, and does not wish to traumatise them TOO early on. That is all."
Gandalf was pretending he was Jerry Springer, and bounded up to his make- believe camera and screamed "Hi folks!!! And today, our topic is - Fanfiction authors who just can't seem to finish off their fanfictions!"
Now for the new stuff.......
Frodo was sitting in a corner, rocking back and forward, muttering "The Ring! It's talking to me!! Make it leave me alone!"
Legolas, who still believed he was an All American Teenage Cheerleader, was begging for some shampoo and probably conditioner as well. "I have a split end!!! I HAVE A SPLIT END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The Author, shocked, asked, "Why are you no longer saying 'like' constantly?"
"Oh, like, come on! Split ends are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too serious!"
He looked around wildly. "Where's Mr. Wuddles? I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't drink. I can't properly moisturise without Mr. Wuddles!!" [*]
Tom Bombadil was sitting underneath a table, spinning the Ring in his fingers. "They wouldn't let me be in the film. It's a [STRONG EXPLETIVE] CONSPIRACY! A CONSPIRACY I TELL YA!! But I rescued my precious.........."
Boromir thought he was a philosopher from Ancient. erm. Whatever Ancient place they have in Middle Earth. For arguments saying we'll call it Grease, where all the Rangers come from. He was sitting ON TOP of the table (which was straining under the weight because it was made out of cheapo plastic, just like everything else in this freaky House of Horrors) muttering philosophy type stuff. "Is Truth Beauty? And is Beauty Truth? I am very pretty, but not necessarily truthful.". At this, Legolas screamed with rage, and knocked Boromir out with one of his pompoms. "I'm the prettiest member of the Fellowship! ME!! NO-ONE ELSE!!!!!!!"
Sam had become suicidal once he realised Frodo just. wasn't interested in him that way. Rosie HAD attempted to consol him by dressing up in boy Hobbit clothes, but she had become so weirded out by what he did that she became a lesbian. Those sort of things just aren't natural! I mean, come on, a guy has to have something deeply wrong with him if he actually ENJOYS the woman's position. But Sam adored. cooking, cleaning and dressmaking. (A/N. Had you there, didn't I? You all thought I was gonna be totally gross and freaky didn't you? DIDN'T YOU?!?!?!?!? MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!)
And Bill. Bill just sat around and laughed at this mockery of the Fellowship, as did Elrond, who had just popped in on his way to steal more of Arwen's clothing, as did Arwen, who thought she was a horse who thought she was human, who thought she was an Elf. Confusing, huh?
Next chapter. . . LEGOALAS IS CURED!! Kinda. And he finds himself a job - in the form of a psychiatrist! MWAHAHAHA! WILL THE STUPIDNESS NEVER END!
[*] This was completely nicked from this amazing story I read, I think it was by IceAmethyst? And her helper EnglishBrat. They had a Truth and Dare thing - It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny. When I find it again, I'll put I direct link to it in this fanfic.
Btb, sorry that chapter wasn't quite as good as the first one. . . at least, that's my opinion. Feel free to correct me if you want!
WiF (I love that saying!! Whoops I Forgot!) Standard disclaimer. Review.
The car broke down, so we are now going on holiday on Sunday, and we're only going for a week. So, don't worry guys, you won't have to wait toooooooooo long.
Btb (ByTheBy), this chapter is better spelt because I actually spellchecked it before posting.
Where was I? OK, I'll just repeat what I said about the guys. This can be like a 'Symptoms' chapter. OMG, I actually said 'like'! And I said OMG! HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahem.
Gimli was in a straight jacket because his insaneness made him believe he was a Moulin Rouge dancer, and he kept trying to do his hair like Christina Aguilara.
Pippin had been eating marshmallows with the Author and now they were both homicidally hyper.
Merry was twirling about in his pink ballerina costume, claiming he was the next Baryshnikov, and no one had the heart to tell him that male ballet dancers don't wear tutus. Or tampons attached to their ears.
Aragorn thought he was a lawyer, and was stalking around everywhere in a long black coat and a powdered wig, but that was ok, because he could apologise for everytime the author overstepped the bounds.
Aragorn broke in, putting on his posh, important voice. "My client wishes me to say that she means no offence by any of her statements, and, if any one DOES take offence, please flame and order her to shove the rating up. She will, because she has a soft spot for kids, and does not wish to traumatise them TOO early on. That is all."
Gandalf was pretending he was Jerry Springer, and bounded up to his make- believe camera and screamed "Hi folks!!! And today, our topic is - Fanfiction authors who just can't seem to finish off their fanfictions!"
Now for the new stuff.......
Frodo was sitting in a corner, rocking back and forward, muttering "The Ring! It's talking to me!! Make it leave me alone!"
Legolas, who still believed he was an All American Teenage Cheerleader, was begging for some shampoo and probably conditioner as well. "I have a split end!!! I HAVE A SPLIT END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The Author, shocked, asked, "Why are you no longer saying 'like' constantly?"
"Oh, like, come on! Split ends are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too serious!"
He looked around wildly. "Where's Mr. Wuddles? I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't drink. I can't properly moisturise without Mr. Wuddles!!" [*]
Tom Bombadil was sitting underneath a table, spinning the Ring in his fingers. "They wouldn't let me be in the film. It's a [STRONG EXPLETIVE] CONSPIRACY! A CONSPIRACY I TELL YA!! But I rescued my precious.........."
Boromir thought he was a philosopher from Ancient. erm. Whatever Ancient place they have in Middle Earth. For arguments saying we'll call it Grease, where all the Rangers come from. He was sitting ON TOP of the table (which was straining under the weight because it was made out of cheapo plastic, just like everything else in this freaky House of Horrors) muttering philosophy type stuff. "Is Truth Beauty? And is Beauty Truth? I am very pretty, but not necessarily truthful.". At this, Legolas screamed with rage, and knocked Boromir out with one of his pompoms. "I'm the prettiest member of the Fellowship! ME!! NO-ONE ELSE!!!!!!!"
Sam had become suicidal once he realised Frodo just. wasn't interested in him that way. Rosie HAD attempted to consol him by dressing up in boy Hobbit clothes, but she had become so weirded out by what he did that she became a lesbian. Those sort of things just aren't natural! I mean, come on, a guy has to have something deeply wrong with him if he actually ENJOYS the woman's position. But Sam adored. cooking, cleaning and dressmaking. (A/N. Had you there, didn't I? You all thought I was gonna be totally gross and freaky didn't you? DIDN'T YOU?!?!?!?!? MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!)
And Bill. Bill just sat around and laughed at this mockery of the Fellowship, as did Elrond, who had just popped in on his way to steal more of Arwen's clothing, as did Arwen, who thought she was a horse who thought she was human, who thought she was an Elf. Confusing, huh?
Next chapter. . . LEGOALAS IS CURED!! Kinda. And he finds himself a job - in the form of a psychiatrist! MWAHAHAHA! WILL THE STUPIDNESS NEVER END!
[*] This was completely nicked from this amazing story I read, I think it was by IceAmethyst? And her helper EnglishBrat. They had a Truth and Dare thing - It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny. When I find it again, I'll put I direct link to it in this fanfic.
Btb, sorry that chapter wasn't quite as good as the first one. . . at least, that's my opinion. Feel free to correct me if you want!
WiF (I love that saying!! Whoops I Forgot!) Standard disclaimer. Review.
