Diary

Episode One: Oliver Wood.

by: Lissa

A/N: Anything Oliver NARRATES will be in .... Also, this takes place in Harry's 3rd year at Hogwarts, and Oliver's 7th, to clear up any confusion.

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(We see Oliver Wood, in front of a black background thing. Diary theme music plays in background.)

OLIVER: You think you know...but you have no idea. (pause) This is the diary of Oliver Wood.



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(Screen that says Oliver Wood: Almost Not Obsessed appears on the screen)

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May 10th, 1993. (pause) Last Quidditch practice before the Cup.

They think that I'm obsessed with Quidditch. I mean, Quidditch is a game that just happens to be my life. There's a big difference.

(Gryffindor boys dorms, 5th year)

OLIVER: Rise and shine, boys!

GEORGE: Blimey Oliver

FRED: What the hell?

OLIVER: (abnormally cheery) Quidditch practice!

Time to wake up the girls!

(Gryffindor 5th year girls dorm)

OLIVER: Girls...it's time to wake up!

KATIE: Oliver...what are you doing in here?

ALICIA: What's your problem?

ANGELINA: Go away, Oliver! You're not supposed to be in here!!

I wonder why they were so cranky. I feel so unloved. Anyways...practice went rather well, I must say.

(Shot to the Locker room, everybody is literally asleep on their feet.)

OLIVER: And then we pull this play...and then Fred...hit a Bludger at Montague, and George...get Malfoy...and then...FRED! GEORGE! Wake up!!

FRED: (eyes snap open) Where am I?

GEORGE: (mumbling) But mommy, it's too early...

OLIVER: Anyways, Harry, get the Snitch once we're 60 POINTS UP!!

(Harry looks like he's struggling to stay awake)

HARRY: Sure, whatever you say...(yawns)

**********************************CM BREAK*****************************

(Hermione steps out, wearing her SPEW badge, in front of a huge screen that says the acronym SPEW)

HERMIONE: Join S.P.E.W., and help free the house-elves! Only two Sickles to join!

Thank you.

(Walks back)

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May 11th, 1993. Today is the Cup. I seriously doubt that we'll win. I mean, Harry's probably going to get attacked by You-Know-Who or something. If You-Know-Who breaks Harry, I'll break him.

(Harry catches the Snitch)

OLIVER: ('Hugs' Harry tightly)

HARRY: Oliver...I can't breathe...let...go!

(team meets up on the ground, and the Chasers kiss Harry, and hug Wood and the Weasleys)

OLIVER: (sobbing) We've...won..(passes the Cup to Harry)

I knew we were going to win! I knew it! All I have to worry about now are the final exams. Piece of cake.

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May 15th, 1993. I passed my exams! Now I'm finally out of Hogwarts! I can join a Quidditch team and play full time!

(Wood at the tryouts for Puddlemere United)

OLIVER: Please...please...please...let me on the team!

CAPTAIN: I will if you'll shut the bloody hell up!

OLIVER: Okay.

Why was he so cranky? Well, I gotta go! I need to obsess and practice some more Quidditch

fin.

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DISCLAIMER: I don't own MTV Diary or any Harry Potter character. HP belongs to JK Rowling, and Diary belongs to MTV. Storyline belongs to me. Tankies.

A/N: Ok, I know that it sucks, but the next "episode" will be better. It won't be Oliver, however.