Diary
Episode 3: Ron Weasley
By Lissa
*************
Disclaimer: See last chapter.
************
RON: You think you know, but you have no
idea. This is the diary of Ron Weasley.
(Screen says Ron Weasley:
The Kid That's Always
Forgotten)
************************************************
September 3rd, 1994. Hogwarts. It's all about Harry. Harry, Harry,
Harry. Nobody ever worries about me. Just because I'm not famouse
doesn't mean that I don't have feelings too. It's like the dude in the
Backstreet Boys, the one with the big fuzzy eyebrows. His cousin
gets more attention than he does. Don't look at me like that!
It's Hermione and her stupid Muggle music's fault!
(Scene: A huge mob of 'Harry-fanatics' chases Harry
across the Quidditch pitch)
HARRY: Ron! Help me!!!
RON: Sorry, I don't like the attention.
(Harry gets dragged in)
He's still mad at me for that one. I dunno
why, though.
*************
September 4th, 1994. Today we had
potions. As usual, Snape took points
away from Gryffindor.
SNAPE: Weasley, Potter, 20
points from Gryffindor!
HARRY: (undertone)What the
bloody hell did I do now?
HERMIONE: (whispering)
LANGUAGE!
RON: Why, Professor?
SNAPE: Because you showed up
for class!
RON: Ok, just checking...
HARRY: (undertone)
Smarmy old bas---
HERMIONE: Language!
RON: Damn him, that
son-of-a-bi--
HERMIONE: Potty mouth.
RON: So flush me!
**************CM BREAK**********
(Hermione steps out...again, with
a desperate look on her face)
HERMIONE: Please...I beg you...
join SPEW! Only one sickle to join!
Call 1-800-555-SPEW today!
(Hermione steps back, harriedly,
and trips, knocking down the lights
and the curtain.)
DOBBY: Dobby is thinking that
nobody is going to join SPEW.
************************
September 5th, 1994. Great Hall.
(Scene: Gryffindor Table)
RON: I know! We can enchant some
rabid woodchucks to follow them!
HARRY: What about a pie-throwing
spell?
DEAN: Or you can do the good-ol'
Muggle shaving cream thingy...
(Harry, Hermione, and Lavender gasp)
SEAMUS: What's shaving cream?
RON: (Blank, confused
expression on face)
Tell me more about this....
SEAMUS: No,really, what's
shaving cream?
DEAN: (whispers in Ron's ear
how to perform the trick)
(Scene: Ron is sneaking out of the
Slytherin fourth-year dor, with a smile
on his face. He seems to make it out,
until we see Filch catch him)
FILCH: Detention for you! (to Mrs. Norris)
We've had a good night, my sweet!
Stupid Dean and his stupid trick. I've
got detention for a month, scrubbing
bed pans! Which, I'm late for now!
See-ya! I hope whoever-the-hell's
after me does a bloody brilliant job!.
*************************
A/N: I know it sucked, but it will
get better! I promise!
~Lissa
Episode 3: Ron Weasley
By Lissa
*************
Disclaimer: See last chapter.
************
RON: You think you know, but you have no
idea. This is the diary of Ron Weasley.
(Screen says Ron Weasley:
The Kid That's Always
Forgotten)
************************************************
September 3rd, 1994. Hogwarts. It's all about Harry. Harry, Harry,
Harry. Nobody ever worries about me. Just because I'm not famouse
doesn't mean that I don't have feelings too. It's like the dude in the
Backstreet Boys, the one with the big fuzzy eyebrows. His cousin
gets more attention than he does. Don't look at me like that!
It's Hermione and her stupid Muggle music's fault!
(Scene: A huge mob of 'Harry-fanatics' chases Harry
across the Quidditch pitch)
HARRY: Ron! Help me!!!
RON: Sorry, I don't like the attention.
(Harry gets dragged in)
He's still mad at me for that one. I dunno
why, though.
*************
September 4th, 1994. Today we had
potions. As usual, Snape took points
away from Gryffindor.
SNAPE: Weasley, Potter, 20
points from Gryffindor!
HARRY: (undertone)What the
bloody hell did I do now?
HERMIONE: (whispering)
LANGUAGE!
RON: Why, Professor?
SNAPE: Because you showed up
for class!
RON: Ok, just checking...
HARRY: (undertone)
Smarmy old bas---
HERMIONE: Language!
RON: Damn him, that
son-of-a-bi--
HERMIONE: Potty mouth.
RON: So flush me!
**************CM BREAK**********
(Hermione steps out...again, with
a desperate look on her face)
HERMIONE: Please...I beg you...
join SPEW! Only one sickle to join!
Call 1-800-555-SPEW today!
(Hermione steps back, harriedly,
and trips, knocking down the lights
and the curtain.)
DOBBY: Dobby is thinking that
nobody is going to join SPEW.
************************
September 5th, 1994. Great Hall.
(Scene: Gryffindor Table)
RON: I know! We can enchant some
rabid woodchucks to follow them!
HARRY: What about a pie-throwing
spell?
DEAN: Or you can do the good-ol'
Muggle shaving cream thingy...
(Harry, Hermione, and Lavender gasp)
SEAMUS: What's shaving cream?
RON: (Blank, confused
expression on face)
Tell me more about this....
SEAMUS: No,really, what's
shaving cream?
DEAN: (whispers in Ron's ear
how to perform the trick)
(Scene: Ron is sneaking out of the
Slytherin fourth-year dor, with a smile
on his face. He seems to make it out,
until we see Filch catch him)
FILCH: Detention for you! (to Mrs. Norris)
We've had a good night, my sweet!
Stupid Dean and his stupid trick. I've
got detention for a month, scrubbing
bed pans! Which, I'm late for now!
See-ya! I hope whoever-the-hell's
after me does a bloody brilliant job!.
*************************
A/N: I know it sucked, but it will
get better! I promise!
~Lissa
