I'm sorry that this chapter took so long to post!! Here it is!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my ideas and my characters... (silence) And Squaresoft... Hee hee hee... *gets knocked out* Why do I never get away with that?...

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It's morning time. Inside the men's cabin is shown. Auron and Kimahri are awake. Suddenly Jecht stumbles into the room, looking drunk.

Jecht: *hic* It's time *hic* for a *hic* event... *faints*

Auron: O.o *walks over to Jecht and pokes him* He appears to be drunk...

Kimahri: Do you know what this means?

Auron: What?

Kimahri: We don't have to do an event today and we can party instead!!

Auron: Yeah, great idea! Let's get the girls!!

Auron and Kimahri run out of the room. Jecht stands up, looking not drunk at all.

Jecht: Hmm... My plan to pretend to be drunk and catch one of these idiots disobeying the rules has worked! So, it appears that Kimahri isn't following the rules... He'll have to pay!!! MWUAHAHAHA!!! Being such a genious, I'll make him!!!

Jecht turns around, starts running, and crashes into a wall.

Jecht: Er... I'm still smart. Now, to get to my cabin. *leaves*

Meanwhile at the women's cabin...

Lulu: So he just walked in, drunk?

Kimahri: Yep. And now we can party!

Lulu: WOOHOO!!! *takes out a cell phone and starts dialing*

A few minutes later, Seymour, Tidus, Wakka, and Yuna arrive.

Wakka: Are we allowed to be here? We got voted off, ya?

Tidus: Who cares? Jecht's practically dead.

Wakka: Ya, that's right. And now I'm reunited with my woman!!

Lulu: !!! *hides*

Rikku: Who said YOU were his woman? *winks at Wakka and smiles seductively*

Everyone: ...

Rikku: ...Sorry. So, I guess we can start the party now?

Auron: Yep.

Rikku: Cool!! *takes off shirt*

Auron: God that's horrid... *shields eyes*

Kimahri: It's even worse than Rinoa, and I didn't think there could be ANYTHING worse than Rinoa's chest... *also shields eyes*

Seymour, Tidus, Wakka, and Yuna: *shield eyes*

Lulu: ... *staring at Rikku*

Rikku: Er... Aren't you also gonna shield your eyes?

Lulu: ...Heh heh... Right. *shields eyes*

Rikku: O_o WTF, Lulu.

Rikku puts her shirt back on and everyone unshields their eyes.

Seymour: So... Maybe we should have some alcohol?

Yuna: Yeah!!! That would be good for me, since I'm a real big drug addict.

Everyone: ...

Tidus: ...It's true. I've seen her drink.

Yuna: Yep. ^^ I'm addicted to cigarettes, sleeping pills, and strippers. Male and female. Everyone: O_O

(a/n: I don't hate Yuna!!! Sorry to anyone who likes her, I have to make fun of people in my fics.)

Seymour: Uh... Alrighty... Well, I happen to have a crate of alcohol right here.

Seymour pulls a giant box out of nowhere. He opens it and hands everyone a bottle.

Wakka: Hmm... These look strange...

The bottle is clear, plastic, has blue liquid inside, and is marked with the word 'Windex'.

Wakka: Oh well. *takes a sip*

Lulu: Yep. It looks decent. *chugs down whole bottle O.o*

Everyone but Seymour drinks their Windex. O_o Suddenly they all fall on the floor, unconcious.

Seymour: Mwuahahahahahaha!!! I'm such a genious!!!

Seymour turns around, starts running, and crashes into a wall.

Seymour: ...Didn't that already happen in this fic?

Seymour runs out the door. He runs into Jecht's private cabin and starts rooting through stuff.

Seymour: Hahahaha... That idiot, Jecht, got me off the boot camp cause he thought I was dead... And he broke my arm... *eye twitches* Now, I'll get my revenge!!!

Seymour pulls Jecht's diary out of a desk. He runs to the door but suddenly, it opens. Jecht is standing there.

Jecht: What the... What are you doing here?!

Seymour: Uh... What are YOU doing here?

Jecht: I'm here to think of plans to get Kimahri voted off. Now, what are you doing here?

Seymour: Er...

Seymour runs past Jecht.

Jecht: Hey, he has my diary!!!! AAAARRGH!!!

Jecht runs after Seymour, but suddenly, he crashes into Auron, Lulu, Rikku, Tidus, Wakka, Kimahri, and Yuna.

Jecht: What are you voted-off people doing here?!

Wakka: Well, we were partying and drinking window solution one second, and the next, we're here...

Jecht: Er, okay.

Auron: Hey, we thought you were drunk!

Jecht: That doesn't matter now... Seymour has my diary!!! For today's event, you can all participate. Go get my diary back!!

8 chocobos magically appear. Everyone mounts them.

Jecht: This will be a race. Whoever reaches Seymour first and retrieves my diary wins. And I'll be riding a chocobo ahead of you people to make sure no one cheats. *glares at Tidus*

Tidus: Aw, man...

Tidus tosses a can of coffee over his shoulder and pats his chocobo.

Tidus: Sorry, I guess there won't be a turbo boost for you...

Jecht: Start the race already!!

Everyone starts riding their chocobos. A few minutes later, they arrive at a giant building. Kimahri's ahead of the whole team. He stops with everyone else stopping behind him. Seymour is on top of the building, holding Jecht's diary. People are on the ground below, looking up.

Seymour: *grins evilly* It's time to read from Jecht's diary!!

Jecht: NOOOOOOOOO!!!! Come on, you fools!!! Climb the building and stop him!!!

Auron, Lulu, Rikku, Kimahri, Tidus, Wakka, and Yuna get off their chocobos and start up the building. Meanwhile, Seymour starts reading.

Seymour: Day 1. Today was the first day of the boot camp! I saw Tidus again. He's so hot, even though he's my son... I'm in love with him. I even killed his mother to be with Tidus. Hahaha. He thinks that his mother just died, but no! I KILLED HER!!! ...Anyway. I had to get kick Tidus off the camp today so no one would get suspicious about my love for him.

Tidus: Why, Dad... I had no idea you felt this way... I love you too!!

Everyone: O_O

Jecht: SHADDAP AND KEEP CLIMBING!!!

Seymour: Day 2. Today's event involved Rikku blowing up Wakka with her grenades. Every part of that sentence sounds wrong, but I don't care. I had to find Wakka in the Blitz sphere. No one knew how to give him CPR, so I demonstrated. Wow... Wakka's mouth tastes like sushi-flavored M&Ms... Mmm, so salty and sweet...

Wakka: No wonder, ya? I've been living off fish and candy for the last 4 years.

Jecht: *smacks own forehead* Keep climbing...

Seymour: Day 3. Today I got Lulu and Rikku to join me in the hot tub. Well, I'm surprised. When they were undressing, I noticed some very weird things... It seems that Rikku has no boobs. She's fat and flat-chested. And Lulu's the same... I realized that her chest is really plastic. It started melting in the tub. That's why I'm beginning to hate women more and more... Men just aren't like that...

Lulu and Rikku: *sweatdrop* None of that chest stuff is true!!!!!!!

Seymour: Day 4. The special effects went crazy today. At the end of the Cactuar event, we were all somehow zapped to the set of Jerry Springer. I gotta fire those special effects guys... What were their names, Quina and Umaro? Anyway, the place brought back some memories. I remember being on the Jerry Springer Show once... It was when I was only 14. I was such a sweet little girl back then... What was the topic that day? Oh yes. It was "My child wants to be a transsexual!" I remember being so surprised when Mommy brought me there.

Jecht: ... *breaks into tears* Stop reading!!!

Seymour: Day 5. Today Akari killed Seymour. Yes!! I wanted to see him die for a long time. I think he's coming on to Tidus. Tidus is MINE!!! Well, I have nothing to be worried about now! When this boot camp is over, I'll reveal my true feelings to Tidus and we can all be happy!! ...I wish I got to kill Seymour. I like to kill stuff. It was so fun thinking of a plan to murder my wife. :D I wanna kill more people now.

Rikku: Seymour's not really dead... Well, just read the next entry.

Jecht: The next entry... Is this morning's!! NOOOO!!! DON'T READ THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seymour: Day 6. It's 6:00 in the morning right now. I'm currently preparing myself for a perfect plan. I'm going to go into the men's cabin, pretend to be drunk, and faint. And depending on what Auron and Kimahri do in the situation, I'll be able to see if they follow the boot camp rules. I don't really wanna see any of them go. Actually, I particularly don't wanna see Kimahri go... Cause I'm in love with him. Yes, I know I'm in love with Tidus... And Wakka... And even Seymour... And even Auron... But Kimahri's the hottest of them all. His blue fur is so shiny... And I love the way he can take it off to reveal Squall underneath... Rinoa's gonna kill me, but I don't care. I'M IN LOVE WITH KIMAHRI!!!!!!!!!! He smiles so beautifully. Like Drew Carey. I'm in love with Drew Carey too. And I also love Solid Snake from Metal G-

Jecht: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seymour suddenly drops the diary. It falls below and Jecht catches it.

Wakka: Aw man! We just spent an hour climbing this building, ya? And it's for nothing and my hands hurt!!! But... I wouldn't mind if someone rubbed them and made them feel better. *winks at Lulu*

Lulu: NO WAY!!!!

Lulu jumps off the building and everyone follows.

Jecht: Kimahri, you're voted off today!

Kimahri: Why? We didn't vote yet. And I won the race.

Jecht: Too bad, you're leaving cause I don't want people thinking I'm in love with you!!!

Yuna: But you are. We heard it being read from your diary.

Jecht: AAAAAAAAAAARRRGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jecht runs away, screaming.

Auron: Now that he's gone... I guess I get to do the questions. Yay!!! Ahem... How does Wakka have access to M&Ms? They don't exist in this world!!! How did Jecht get Lulu and Rikku to follow him into a hot tub if I couldn't?!?!

Rikku: Why do you get to do the questions and not me?!?!? I WANNA!!! *strangles Auron*

Auron: *choking* Til' next time... *faints*

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Please review, I'd appreciate it.

I don't hate any of the FFX characters, or any FF characters for that matter! This is a HUMOR fic, and I have to make fun of characters. So don't go telling me that I suck cause I hate Yuna or something, cause I don't.

VERY IMPORTANT NOTE!!!!!!!!!!!!: I mentioned this in the previous chapter: In the next chapter, Lulu will be voted off. (Someone wanted her to leave, many chapter ago... I'm really sorry to that person for not making her sooner! ^^;;) In the final chapter, Auron and Rikku will have a face-off. I'm taking votes on who should be the loser, thus making the other person the winner. Please tell me which one you think should win and which one should leave!! Vote either here when reviewing, or on www.ffonline.com in either of my fics (I'm known as Tifa Lockhart there too). You may also send me e-mails at alex52@netzero.net . But PLEEEEASE don't vote more than once!!! So far, Rikku and Auron are tied in their votes. Break the tie, people.