Piiko: Well here it is in all its twisted glory. You can't blame us for this folks. It was inspired while all of us were at Lilo & Stitch. We had just scene the second Harry Potter movie poster with Dobby on it, and had all recoiled in terror. If I was little I would be mortified by that hideous thing!
MiniBrock: So once we got into the theatre, we started talking about the new movie. Suddenly we noticed the dramatic music playing in the theatre. With the music, we formed some story of a grand majestic battle of love between Harry and Snape for Dobby's love. And they were on a cliff overlooking the sea, and there was some storm with lightning and thunder and death and Harry wept. Wept. Wept...
Piiko: And we decided it was too funny not to make into a story. Somehow we forgot the majestic battle between Snape and Harry… and the cliff… the sea… and oh! The lightning, thunder, death stuff, too. But that doesn't mean if we get bored we won't one day! XD
MiniBrock: That said, we sent out our apologizes to one J.K. Rowling. These characters all belong to her, at least by name. Not sure how much these folks masquerading as 'Harry' and 'Dobby' are related to the book. But I wouldn't provoke us with praise if I were you, gentle reader. We will write a Snape/Harry battle over Dobby's affections if people like this one well enough. And with that final threat, we present to you...
O, woe! O, rapture!
An All Holy Smartness Production
It was love at first sight.
The first time Harry saw that certain someone he knew that something was just…different. A strange aura of tender passions emanated - it seemed - from within the depths of Dobby's very soul. And Harry could only begin to comprehend the lengths of this unique sensation dwelling in his stomach when he would gaze into those freakishly enormous green eyes. Under all the obnoxious "Mr. Harry Potter's," and the voice that made nails over a chalkboard feel like a welcomed change, and that face calling to be smacked numerous times with a broom handle there was someone beautiful. Someone so beautiful that Harry wondered if perhaps an angel had fallen. And knowing Dobby for those few moments alone made the prospect not so far-fetched. The fallen part anyway.
But still, Harry Potter was in love.
He even forced by a wide, idiot grin that tugged at his mouth. Surely that would be silly. Oh, Hell these feelings themselves were quite silly all on their own. The urge to giggle at every word flowing from Dobby's - no doubt - very leather-like lips, or perhaps even so far as to see for himself if those lips tasted as like leather as they looked. Harry blushed and gave his psyche a firm slap. None of those ridiculous thoughts now!
"Mr. Harry Potter?"
Oh, even the voice grew on you. The young wizard's mind unwittingly wandered to wondering just what that same voice would sound like while murmuring sweet-nothings into his ear at the late hours of the evening and how it would cry out him na-
And Oh. My. God.
Nevermind that.
"What?"
"Mr. Harry Potter can not go back to Hogwart's this year! No, no never!"
"Why?" And can I spend the year with you? His mind asked.
"NO!" The thing screamed, clutching his head almost in agony. "Never! Can't tell you, Mr. Harry Potter! Want to tell, but can't tell!" Dobby then proceeded to beat his against the sharp corner of the bed's footboard.
Harry winced at the sight; hurt himself by Dobby's self-inflicted abuse. O, woe. Still, Harry knew a bit of a sadist lurked somewhere deep within because, hey, if Dobby was into that kind of stuff then…
NO! Bad Harry! Bad thoughts! Bad!
"Okay," Harry said willing his mind to focus on the present. "So, you're here to tell me to not go back to school this year, but you won't tell me why?"
Dobby sighed in obvious relief. "Yes, yes! That is exactly it! Mr. Harry Potter is so wise, so quick to understanding Dobby's troubles. Mr. Harry Potter is wonderful!"
Harry, despite his peculiar attachment to the guy, rolled his eyes. He'd never really appreciated all the compliments and attention people would pay him. If he got to have things his way anyone that showered him with flood-warning waves of praise and kind words he have them go hang themselves. Or throw themselves off a cliff. Or maybe -
"All right, that's great." Harry continued. "But why can't you tell me why I shouldn't return to school?"
Dobby's lip quivered and Harry had the sudden desire to kiss it away. Someone seeing the poor creature on the verge of tears brought a stinging tear to his own eyes crafted from the finest of emeralds. They both had green eyes. The thought made him smile.
"CAN'T TELL!" Dobby shrieked, shaking like a Tickle-Me-Elmo on Speed, or maybe just loaded with a time-bomb ready to detonate. Either way, Harry felt the urge to take an involuntary step back. He inwardly scolded himself. This freakish little creature was surely involved in a great inner turmoil. This self conflict caused salty tears to spring to his saucer shaped eyes.
I too am burdened with an inner desire to tell something so secret that not even the cherubim babes would dare whisper it… I love you, Dobby!
Just as he had screamed it within his own mind, he found the words tumbling from his own mouth. Dobby stared mutely. "Mr. Harry Potter…?" his ear piercing voice questioned. Harry himself stared back, mouth slack. He had shut his eyes only for a second when he felt a warm caress at his lower lip.
Reeling back, Harry noticed Dobby smiling coyly whilst looking up at him through his lashes. The feeling of the small nibbling kiss he had given Harry still lingered.
"Dobby feels the same way, yes…" he said as seductively as a House Elf possibly can. O, rapture! The scar on his forehead pulsed with a brilliant warmth. The warmth was unmistakable. The warmth was love. Pure and unbridled.
For the rest of the night, Harry cuddled with Dobby under the blankets of his bedroom where they whispered intimately unto one another so the Dursley's would not find out long into the night…
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~