Ding Dong, Romano's Dead!

The title explains it all, folks. This little piece of Fanfiction was supposed to be a part of a story, but due to a Cherry Coke and Popcorn high, it got a little too twisted for my story. Anyhow, please enjoy, and read at your own risk. You may find yourself scarred for life. This is my first ER story. Up until now, I have only written Sailor Moon stories, so please find it somewhere in your heart to review. Who knows, this may turn into a twisted series.

Doug made his way through the ER and jumped up onto a counter, grabbing the newspaper on his way. "If I could have everyone's attention." he began. Everyone looked up at him from where they stood, discussing the ER's latest pool. "I just read in the paper-" "Doug read the paper?" asked Carter, and the ER broke out into hysterics. "Yes, Carter, I read the paper and I happily- err. sadly discovered that Dr. Romano died yesterday morning while on vacation in Europe." "Finally!" yelled Carter. "Jerry, music!" Jerry pushed play on the ER's stereo and the song that the munchkins sang when the Wicked Witch of the West was dead in the Wizard Of Oz blasted through the speakers. "Conga Line!" yelled Mark, and everyone formed one behind Doug, who had jumped off the desk and started to do one with Carol. Carter, Jerry, and the rest of the staff eagerly joined in. The music screeched to a halt when Kerry Weaver crutched her way in and stopped it. "What is going on here?" she demanded, forcing back a smile that was playing on her lips. "Didn't you listen to the song?" asked Carol. "Romano's dead!" yelled Doug. "Conga Line!" yelled Mark. "Is that all you can say?" asked Carter. "For now. Conga Line!" Mark yelled again. Jerry left the end of the conga line and pressed play on the stereo once more. This time, Kerry latched on to the end of the conga line, behind Lucy and joined in on the fun. The conga line made its way up to the Surgical Wing of the ER and made its way through a surgery in progress. Jerry walked behind the conga line with a portable boom box of the Wicked Witch song. As the conga line progressed in, each and every member of the ER staff was singing "Ding Dong, Romano's Dead," and alternating with the other lines. "What is going on here?" yelled Elizabeth over the noise. "That's exactly what I'd like to know!" yelled Anspaugh. Jerry pauses the music long enough for Doug to explain. "Romano's dead, so in other words." he stopped talking long enough for Mark to say his famous line. "Conga Line!" Elizabeth throws off her gloves and all other surgical protection and joins the conga line in her scrubs. "Come on, Peter!" she yells as the music starts up again. Peter, not needing to be told twice, follows suit, as does Anspaugh and the conga line proceeds back to the ER, through the exam rooms, and finally out to the Ambulance Bay. It follows down to the Funeral Home, where Romano's funeral is being held, with no one attending. Mark and Doug grab the coffin and toss it in the ground, and then everyone (except Kerry) grabs a shovel and bury his coffin. Carter takes a piece of cardboard, glues it to a stick, quickly writes "Here lies Romano, the man that no one liked," sticks it into the ground and the conga line proceeds back to the ER. Once back at the ER, Kerry and Anspaugh begin to put up their "No Romano" signs in place of the "No Smoking" signs. They also remove all "Smoke Free Zone" signs and replace them with "Romano Free Zone" signs.

County General ER is once a happy place again, due to the lack of Romano. Kerry Weaver, with the help of Doug, gets onto a chair and begins her song and dance routine of "I'm going to get Romano's job" and everyone laughs and cheers. As patients are discharged, each and every one stops to throw darts at a six-foot-tall poster of Romano, in his Valentine's Day Boxers. Yes, County General is a very happy place to be.