Author's Note: Hey guys! It's been awhile since I've written anything but I finally got some time to get the first two chapters of this fic finished. Thanks to everyone who's left reviews for my other stories- I really appreciate your comments and input! I hope you all enjoy this! -Dalliann

The Let's Get Reacquainted Syndrome

Chapter 1

By Dalliann

Agent Elle sat down at one of the large computer consuls in the central communications room. She looked around for potential prying eyes and, finding no one who seemed particularly interested, logged on to the MIB Database Search Engine. A holo-map of the galaxy popped into life before her.

Like she had done a hundred times in the last few weeks she went about reducing the program's possible finds. Earth, North America, United States, New York, Rochester, 234 S. Fitzgerald Court, George and Rose Weaver.

The screen blinked for a moment but then began focusing the picture, each time coming in substantially closer until she could see the familiar treetops of Rochester. And under those trees a massive Victorian house sat center stage. Now the screen divided itself into two separate views.

One peered into an open bathroom window where an elderly man was shaving his face and singing some tune that couldn't be heard through this camera positioned light-years away. The other pictured a woman, about the same age as her husband, who was standing in the middle of the lawn with a clipboard. She seemed frustrated, waving her arms in the air and shouting mute words at several men dressed in white catering outfits.

"Who's the shrieking troglodyte?"

Elle grit her teeth and turned in her chair. Her partner, Agent X, was watching the screen with smug distaste. "That 'troglodyte' is my mother. And she's not shrieking, she's... directing," she explained.

"So that's where you inherited your temper. And I'm guessing the old guy in his pajamas is your father, right?"

"He's not old. He's maturing. There's a difference."

X smiled cynically and directed the cameras further into the backyard. A tall white tent was being set up near the house and the caterers were pulling tables in front of it. The yard sloped down a bit toward a pond where an old gazebo was being fitted with tufts of white flowers and yards of silk ribbon.

"What are they doing?" he asked. Elle sighed and hit a button. The image instantly died and X looked at her questioningly.

"My little sister is getting married today. It's a family tradition to have all the weddings in the gazebo. For luck, or something," she said. "And I can't go. I missed John's wedding, I missed Heather having her twins, I missed Gabe's graduation from Harvard, I missed Mark's inaugural dinner, and now I'm going to miss Willow's wedding, too."

"You have five siblings?" he asked in disbelief.

"Actually I have six but 'George' is now 'Georgianna'... We don't talk about him much."

"Humans," X muttered, "They spread like bacteria... mutated bacteria."

Elle put her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side in a challenge. "Your people stop at one?"

"It's the law. If we had as many brats as your kind produces we'd have to take out a loan on another planet. Our ecosystem couldn't handle an extra ten billion lives. Humans are just leading themselves into a black hole."

Elle raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. Instead, she turned and began walking to the lobby elevator. X followed with a long stride.

"So where are we going?" he asked, pulling on the human mask he was less than fond of.

She shrugged. "I am going downtown for a chocolate binge. I don't know where you're going."

"You know, if you're going to be so aloof we're never going to get to the point of toleration," X reminded her.

"I can tolerate you."

"Well, I guess I haven't reached that plateau 'cause you still bug the heck out of me. I'm driving," he said and dangled his set of car keys in front of her. She sighed loudly and followed him into the parking garage to their Blazer.

*****

"...Willow is the kind of person who has everything planned out ten years in advance. When she was nine she designed her wedding gown. She even called up florists and pastry chefs and clergymen to see how much the whole thing would cost. That became her motivation when we had to go out into the working world. She only wanted a job that could pay for the ceremony she had planned. That's why she became an attorney. Lots of cash, there. Of course that was like fifteen years ago. It's all going to be a lot more expensive now. I wonder how much more it's costing her than she originally thought..." Elle looked at her partner. He was sitting wide-eyed, staring at her in shocked lethargy.

"X? Are you okay?" she asked.

He blinked for a moment and cleared his throat. "I have never seen someone talk for twenty minutes straight without taking a breath or swallowing. I think that must be some kind of record."

She blushed lightly and focused on the piece of fudge-brownie cake in front of her. "Sorry. I just miss them," she said. They were sitting in the back of a new coffee house that had just opened. Each wall was painted with a different 'modern' color like "Gangrenous Green" or "Putrefying Purple". The tables were cut in odd shapes and the chairs were a challenge to climb into.

Elle glanced at the other loungers. Most of them were college kids dressed in gothic black clothing, trying to pick up on the moodiness of the room for their latest inspired writing. The other customers varied from teens with blue hair to supposedly 'trendy' business executives.

X took a drink of his coffee and shuddered. "I don't know how you people drink this poison. It tastes like wet dirt."

"Then why do you keep ordering more?"

"Zed says I don't blend well enough. He thinks I should participate in more human activities. Like drinking your disgusting beverages, taking an interest in your pointless sports programs, investing in your corrupted stockmarket-"

"And listening to your over-emotional partner's problems?" Elle asked with a suspicious glance his way.

X debated his answer carefully. "No. Although he'd probably say this counts as a blatantly human activity, I came here because I wanted to," he finally decided.

Elle nodded skeptically. "Right. So what was I talking about, if you really were paying attention?"

A look of irritation flickered over her partner's face but he took a deep breath and adjusted his tie. "Let's see. Your childhood in Rochester was a particularly dull story until your brother Gabe came back from military school and proceeded to torture you through junior high. And your sister Heather backed over your cat with her car when you were fourteen, which explains your over-protectiveness of Orion. Oh, and your medical schooling. Now that was riveting. Well, maybe the first minute of it. And then you went off on Willow's compulsion to control her surrounding environment. In general, I think that was it. Funny, it took so much longer when you said it."

Elle scowled and crossed her arms over her chest. "Well maybe I wouldn't have to talk so much if you actually contributed something to the conversation."

"Like what?"

"Like... if you hate the human race so much why did you accept the offer to leave your galaxy and work on Earth?"

X grinned broadly. "Do you know what kind of power the MIB agency has? Here, I rule over humans."

"That's your entire reason? Just because you have the say-so over another species?" she scoffed.

"Like that's not the reason you're here. That's why you became a doctor. You liked the control you had over other peoples lives- the control over whether they lived or died."

Elle's jaw dropped. "That is the most despicable thing I've ever heard you say. Could you possibly be any more morbid?"

"No, that's your arena, I believe. That's the one thing I can't figure out, though. Why'd you take up the mortician's side of things? Did you find out you didn't have as much power over death as you once thought?"

Elle pursed her lips and stood up. She took out two dollars from her purse and dropped it on the table. "We should get back to headquarters."

"Now? We've got the day off and you want to go back to work?"

"Seriously? I'm about to strangle you. I need to focus on something besides your arrogance and prejudices. Maybe Zed will have some kind of odd-job lined up..."

X jumped up after his partner. She walked out of the cafe and toward their car parked on the curb. X was right behind her. "Elle, come on-"

"Please, don't even talk to me. I'm armed and agitated, not a good combination. You should know that by now," she spat. She reached for the door handle but he stepped in between her and the car.

"I'm not the reason you're angry," he told her. She cocked an eyebrow, just daring him to continue. He cleared his throat again and avoided her gaze. "Okay, so maybe I'm partially the reason you're angry. But for the most part, you're just ticked off because I'm right. You gave up your family to be an intergalactic know-it-all and now you're rethinking your decision. Right?"

Elle crossed her arms tightly and shrugged. "So, let's go," he said.

"Back to headquarters?"

"No. Rochester. Visit with your family for awhile. See if that's really what you want. If it is, you have a short run-in with a neuralizer and go back to your insipid life at the morgue. Simple."

"Right, simple. Except one thing. MIB rules prohibit any and all contact with former acquaintances. Period. Just by being in Rochester I could be terminated."

"So we'll be careful."

"No."

"You're just dragging out this whole-"

"No!"

X sighed and walked around to the driver's side. "You're going to regret not going," he told her as they both got in.

"Well, that's my problem to deal with, isn't it?"

He sighed and started up the car. They pulled into traffic and drove down the street in silence. About three blocks away from MIB headquarters, he turned down a side street. Elle looked at him in confusion.

"The building is back the other way," she said sternly.

"Who's driving this thing, you or me?"

"Well, seeing as you have no idea where we work I think I should be at the wheel."

"We're not going to the agency. We're going to Rochester."

"What? What did I tell you? I CAN'T GO THERE!" she yelled.

"You can't interact with anyone from your past. I, on the other hand, have never met any of them. I'm only doing what Zed told me to do. You know, getting in touch with my human side."

Elle scowled at him. "Pull over," she demanded.

"Or what?"

She blinked for a moment. Or what? "Or... or I'll..." she trailed off. X gave her a cocky grin. Okay, that's it, she thought angrily. Her hand disappeared into her jacket and came back out with a Carbonizer. She powered it up and leveled it at his ear. "Or this."

X glanced at the gun. Unimpressed. "You're going to shoot me? I'm sure that'll be real easy to explain to Zed. Yeah, right. Besides, if you do we'll crash. Just sit back and enjoy the ride."

Elle stared at him. Well I'm not taking the blame for this. If anything I'm a captive. I'm being held hostage. It's not like I can just jump out. Maybe this little stunt will be enough to send him back to the Jee'Dang galaxy. She put on her seatbelt as X reached for the red button on the clutch.

"How far away is Rochester?"

"About 300, maybe 350 miles."

"Good. We'll be there in forty-five minutes."