Part Six:
My first class of the day was an integrated mix of Algebra Two and Pre-Calculus. Not a great way to start the day, trust me, and both, in my opinion, are pretty worthless subjects. After all, what was I going to need them for? Paying taxes? Cutting my hair? Shaving Wufei bald and painting his scalp green? So, typical of me, I just sat in the class trying to decide how crazy a person would have to be to marry Relena. It required some hard thinking.
This time no one bothered to look my way when my chair fell over. Except, of course, for that idiotic teacher, Mrs. Glebes. Teachers in themselves, granted, are mostly half-witted, since they actually went to a school so they could go back to school, but this lady was the definition of idiotic. Mrs. Glebes was in her mid-fifties, probably, with really oily looking black hair and these brown eyes that almost made me sick. She either had a lisp or a weird accent, so everything she said was hard to understand. Or it might have been her huge buckteeth getting in the way. If it weren't for my being so polite, I might have called her the beaver. She did, in some odd retrospect, remind me a lot of that semi-aquatic mammal that we all love so much. Even if she was less than loveable.
Anyway, the second my chair toppled, Mrs. Glebes made her way to my desk and squinted her eyes down at me. I wasn't looking all that graceful at the time, still dazed from the impact of the fall and hurting a bit in my arse, but seeing her stare down at me wasn't my cup of tea in a normal situation. This only made it worse.
"Mistaw Maxwell," she drawled in the odd dialect of hers. "What have yew been dewing now to make yew act like in such an ungentlemanly mannaw?"
Did I forget to mention that Mrs. Glebes had a thing about girls acting 'lady-like' and guys acting like 'young gentlemen?' She hated Jenny, a pretty blonde girl who sat three desks in front of me, because she tended to drape her leg over the her desk during class. I wasn't sure why though, because Jenny had a pair of really great looking legs.
"Mrs. Glebes, I was just... I... I..." I was at a loss for words. If any of the others had been there, I think they would have had a heart attack or something. Since I'm not very good at coming up with good replies right on the spot, I just pulled a random quote out of my head. "I had to fall, to lose it all, but in the end it didn't matter, Mrs. G."
Some of the class tittered at that, probably the ones who recognized the quote from literature class. Mrs. Glebes didn't appreciate it at all, for a couple reasons. None of which were the ones I was expecting. I guess she wasn't a literature buff. "Mistaw Maxwell, how daw yew wefaw to me in such a mannaw!" It took me a minute to translate that, but it came out to be 'how dare you refer to me in such a manner.'
"Ma'am, I..." After what seemed like an eternity, my head finally supplied an answer. "I would appreciate it if you would explain the..." I scanned the front black board quickly. "The law of tangent in more depth."
Mrs. Glebes squinted at me, like she was trying to see past my face into my mind. Then she nodded. "Vewy well, Mistaw Maxwell. We will discuss it aftaw classes."
I groaned. Out of one mess and into another. Now I had to actually talk to Mrs. Glebes after school! Talking to any teacher longer than you have to is horrible by itself, but Mrs. Glebes!
I pulled my chair back into its upright position, grumbling quietly to myself. When Mrs. Glebes was out of visual range, I put my head down on my desk and shut my eyes, more to block out the world than to spite her.
I woke up to the sound of the bell and that of students gathering together their books. The sound of about thirty students leaving a room is almost deafening. Yawning, I gathered mine together too. I had history next, which would give me plenty of time for another nap. And it wasn't like history was useful anyway. Just learning about a bunch of wars that really aren't worth all the trouble of learning about at all. War is hell, no matter what way you slice it, and that's about all you really need to know about them.
The bell for lunch was ringing before I knew it. After snoozing through both my history class and my Japanese class, I was more or less feeling human, despite the fact that I still had an appointment with Mrs. Glebes after classes. Being in a private school has its ups and downs, I guess. So far I hadn't found any ups, but I was sure they were there somewhere. If I hadn't learned anything, I should have learned that.
Forget kindergarten, everything I needed to know I learned in the war.
I went upstairs to my dorm room before lunch, to put away all the textbooks that had really only served as some lousy pillows that morning. That's unusual for me, I suppose, since I normally avoid that room at all costs. I guess that I was kind of hoping to see if the crazy soldier fiancé guy was really going to be rooming with me. My feelings on the issue were half and half; it would be nice if this guy was tolerable and a lot of fun and could put up with me, but I wasn't sure if I wanted another roommate to bail on me. Trust me, that really does something negative to your self-esteem.
But, as of yet, there were no changes in my cozy little sanctuary. If he was coming, it wouldn't be for a while yet. So I went on down to lunch.
The others had saved me a seat at their table, and someone had already gotten me a lunch. Wufei, probably. I smiled, remembering a time not long before Heero left, and a little before Mari Maia tried to take control. The four of us- Wufei was off somewhere doing who knows what- were off in some park for a picnic. The notion of Heero at a picnic was enough to crack anyone up, granted, but what was really great was the outfit he wore to it. But that's another story.
Anyway, we were all sitting on a bench somewhere, and Heero and I went off to leave the love bunnies alone. When we came back, Heero was a bit peeved because there was only enough room on the bench for one person to sit. So he came up with the easiest solution.
He lifted the iron bench right off it's foundation and deposited Quatre and Trowa on the cement ground. They didn't even notice, I think; they just continued playing kissy-face with each other. Looking back on it, I'm kind of sorry I never showed Heero how to play the game. Even though I wouldn't have been caught dead playing kissy-face with a guy wearing a pair of fishing pants and a tank top. Stupid me, I'd gone and done his laundry for him. I seem to recall missing those spandex shorts and wanting to know if I could shrink his jeans so I could get the same results and see a little more of his cute rear end. I did, and I was extremely happy. Needless to say, Heero was not.
I snapped out of my reveries when someone grabbed me by my jacket collar. I was half pulled and half dragged over to the table. Wufei almost threw me down onto the bench. Rubbing my neck, I looked up at the Chinese boy, dazed.
"What were you doing?" Wufei hissed, teeth bared. Quatre watched wide-eyed, but he was still shoveling food into his mouth as he did. Trowa watched, indifferent, as he sipped from a plastic glass. What is it with plastic glasses, anyway? Isn't that kind of hypocritical? And what idiot first thought that up, anyway? Shouldn't they be called plastics instead of glasses? It didn't make sense at all.
"What was I doing?" I asked. Wufei frowned at me, but there was confusion written in his eyes. "I don't remember. I was thinking about the park. And the fishing pants Heero wore."
Trowa pressed his mouth into a thin line. "That was fairly amusing," he recalled.
Quatre lay his fork down and swallowed the piles of food he had deposited in his mouth. "You don't know what you were doing?" I shrugged. "You did that without... Duo, you're joking, aren't you? Please say you are."
"No, should I be? What did I do?" I really was confused now. Especially when I saw the knife clutched in my fist. I didn't remember picking that up. And, when I saw the faint glimmer of an anxious tear in Wufei's eye, I knew something strange was going on.
"You honestly don't know?" Quatre asked again, voice quivering in his concern. I sighed.
"Obviously not. And where did this knife come from?"
Trowa gave the other two a little shake of his head, and they shut up before they could tell me anything. Then the uni-banged pilot continued eating his lunch. I sighed, knowing that, with Trowa around, I wasn't going to find out anything. It was almost like he felt like he had to protect me, ever since he'd let slip that Heero wasn't actually six feet under. But it must have been really hard on him; his hands were shaking and his eye was twitching a little bit. I had the feeling that he was trying to decide if telling me how I'd worried Wufei so much that he nearly cried or how I ended up with sharp objects was going to hurt me or not.
Quatre cleared his throat. "Duo, have you seen Miss Relena yet?" he asked, giving Trowa his big 'don't-get-mad-at-me' look. "Do you know if she's made an appearance yet?"
I shrugged. "I dunno, but no one's been in my room since this morning."
Wufei smirked. "You checked?" I nodded, a bit sheepish. "I believe that's a change for you, Maxwell."
"Didn't we agree that you were going to call me Duo for now on?"
Wufei shrugged. "Old habits die hard," he told me, smirk growing into what may have been a small smile. I grinned back. "But I'm doing my best to remember. Eat your lunch." I shrugged and swallowed a bite of the poison the cafeteria likes to call food. It really wasn't that bad, for a change.
"Smurf-a-licious!" I cried out happily, already letting the previous five minutes fade into the storeroom of my mind, never to be seen again.
This remark resulted in quite a few stares in my direction. I waved a brief hello to all my loyal viewers, some of which were giggling and others of which were muttering to their neighbors, probably about how I was going to end up in a snug white coat drawing on the walls with a blue crayon. After all, I was a former Gundam pilot. I grinned even wider. It was only natural that I would be a little bit crazy. It was the stereotype we, the Gundam pilots, had all been fitted with, after all, wasn't it?
Wufei was frowning. "Duo, what does that mean?"
"What, smurf-a-licious?"
"Well, yes, that too," Wufei admitted. "But what does that phrase you said earlier mean?"
"Phrase I said earlier? Wu-man, you know Japanese better than I do!" I protested, startled. I was trying to stall while I thought up a good way to explain 'smurf-a-licious,' too. "Did I say it too quickly or something?"
Trowa and Quatre exchanged another one of those looks. Quatre interceded. "You said it in English, Duo." He thought a moment. "It sounded like..." Then he said the words, slowly, as if he was trying hard to remember it. I looked at him wide-eyed.
"When did I say that?"
"What does it mean, Duo?" Quatre asked. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought he was scared. And I couldn't blame him, I never would have said the phrase he had just repeated for me unless I had gone completely insane. "Please tell us."
I shrugged. "When did I say it?"
Trowa frowned. "Just before Wufei instated you over to the table. What is its definition?"
I had to smile at that. Trust Trowa to put something simple into big words. "The closest definition I could give you in Japanese would be something you probably wouldn't want to hear," I warned them. Quatre tilted his head thoughtfully.
"Tell us, Maxwell!" Wufei looked angry now. I couldn't blame him for that, either. I was stalling, and they all knew it. But I kind of doubted that they would blame me, after I told them what it meant.
I said it in English first, then repeated myself in the one language we can all understand. "I can't help the god-damn fucking dead." The words sounded harsh on my lips, and I swallowed hard, trying to convince myself that Quatre hadn't heard me correctly before. I think I already knew that Quatre's repetition of my English words were right enough.
The others were silent at first. Then Quatre cleared his throat. "That's what it meant?" he asked, shocked. I nodded. He gave a strangled cough, then a choked laugh. "Well, it was very... colorful, I have to say."
"Yeah."
We were silent for a long while. Quatre wasn't even shoveling his food into that bottomless pit of his. That by itself was a shocker. They were taking it much better than I had expected. Which wasn't saying much.
"Smurf-o-licious is from a television show," I said finally, breaking the silence. "A show about these little blue people about an inch high with creepy pants called smurfs. I don't think they age at all," I mused to myself. Then I continued. "They have their own little community and they're always getting chased around by cats and evil wizards and stuff. And they have one girl in the whole place."
Trowa almost smiled. "Smart little blue people."
I snorted, understanding that Trowa was doing the same thing I was, trying to lighten the gloomy mood that we'd thrown into the wind. After all, you have to admit, suddenly yelling out that you can't help the deceased is probably a bit shocking, especially if you don't remember saying anything about it. "Yeah, right. The next thing you'll say is that-"
Trowa interrupted. "Sex would be great if women weren't involved."
Wufei shook his head. "In your case, they aren't." That made me grin, and Quatre blush. Trowa didn't reply, but went back to picking at his food. He looked deep in thought, but I knew it definitely wasn't about dead people. When he lay down his fork, it was with a slight smile and a resonated sigh.
"Quatre, come with me up to our dorm?" he asked. "I seem to have lost my appetite. And," he continued slowly, looking down on the floor around his seat, "I believe I have forgotten my papers for class."
Quatre frowned. "But they're- oh. Yes, I'll go with you." He stood up. "Good bye, Duo, Wufei. We will see you during chemistry."
"Bye Q." I watched them leave. Then I leaned over to Wufei. "I think Trowa must have done some good forgetting to need Q's help finding his school papers," I said quietly, with a grin. "Trowa must have some interesting side activities planned."
Wufei choked on his food and gave the side of my head a little punch. "Shut up, Maxwell. Their personal lives are not for you to question." Then he smirked. "Why is it you have nicknames for both me and Quatre but not for Trowa?"
I shrugged. "Because Trowa gets enough nicknames from Q. Like Snuggle Bunny and Sweet Muffin. And Trowa-kins and Love Camel."
Wufei strangled what may have been a laugh. "I don't believe Trowa fits any of those names, Duo." He paused. "Love Camel?"
"Well, it makes sense. Q is Arabian, after all. You would think he would fondly remember some of the animals that come from his native land." I grinned.
He rolled his eyes. Then he hesitated. "Did you have a nickname for Heero?" he asked slowly, as if saying it slower would help ease my pain.
I bit my lip. "None that I would ever tell him about."
Wufei snorted. "That means that you had one or two."
"Or three or four or five." I grinned. "And its have, not had. He's still out there, somewhere, I'm sure of that. He's just not ready to make an appearance in the world of the living and breathing yet. I may tell him when he decides he is ready, though, if I'm feeling suicidal. Not that he was ever ready before, he seemed a bit creeped out by the outside world, and with a blonde princess following him around, who could blame him?"
By this time I could tell that Wufei was zoning me out, and that was just fine with me. It gave me time to think about stuff before the lunch bell rang again. Like about that brief interlude in time where it seemed I'd done some pretty strange things. Ending up with a knife clenched in one fist and talking about dead people, in English, no less, which wasn't even the language I'd grown up with, was probably the least of my worries. I wouldn't be surprised if I'd jumped on top of a table and started praying to Jack the Ripper. Or ranting about miracles, Shinigami, and sinking waste deep into a newly filled grave. I wondered faintly if I'd done stuff like that before, and just not have known about it. I also wondered if it was some sort of Zero System side effect, but quickly dismissed that notion. After all, the Zero System was dead, and if it had been some sort of reaction, Quatre would have had it first. Probably. Most likely. Or at least that's what I told myself to reassure my jumping nerves.
I began to wonder if I was just going crazy. For a brief minute or two, I was positive that that was the answer. I'd been wondering for a while if that was why I was the way I was. It wasn't too hard to believe, really, since I've heard a lot of war veterans come out nut cases. Who was to say I was any different? There are a lot of crazy people in the world, after all. There had been times when I had been certain that I was insane, and that I had slid off the cracker a long time ago. But, the question really was, do crazy people know that they're crazy? And, if they do know that they're crazy, are they really crazy at all?
Ah, the universal question. It goes up on the list with did the chicken or the egg come first, is there a holy presence watching over us, and what happens to that other sock that you know you put in the washer with the rest of the laundry.
I bet no teacher knows the answer to those babies. Yeah, baby.
Something was tugging a little on the end of my braid, and I snatched it away protectively, then looked down. Wufei was watching something on the floor with utmost interest, and I suddenly saw why. I let go of my hair.
It was probably the cutest kitten I had ever seen in my life, black with a little spot of white on the end of its nose. I tilted my head like Quatre does when he's puzzled or interested in something and saw Wufei give a little smile.
"It's been trying to get to your braid for almost a whole minute now," Wufei told me. "A very persistent creature."
"I bet." The kitten tugged on my braid again, and this time it got a good hold. I winced and reached down, picking it up. "Don't you know pets aren't supposed to be in the cafeteria?" I asked it. The silly animal just stared at me and purred, then reached out a paw and batted at my bangs. Wufei smirked.
"It likes you."
"I guess. Who do you think it belongs to?"
Wufei shook his head. "No one, I believe. It's probably one of the kittens the library cat was carrying."
"What library cat?"
Wufei sighed. "There's a cat that the librarian lets stay in the library office. It was expecting kittens last I heard, about a month ago. This must be one of them. You could probably keep it, if you wished. The librarian was complaining about the animals, and she was going to send the kittens to a shelter as soon as they were old enough. You may be saving its life."
A little heartstring twinged at the mention of an animal shelter. I'm well aware that a shelter is a nice place for animals, but, ever since I found out what they do to the poor things if they stay too long, I've held places like that in utter contempt. When Wufei mentioned shelters, I knew that I was going to keep the cat.
"I've never had a cat before," I thought aloud. Wufei gave me what was almost a smile. "What am I supposed to do with it?"
"You may want to feed it."
I chuckled. "You think? I wonder if it eats like Q does. If so, I'm going to be feeding it a whole lot." I set the kitten down on the table and let it nose at my half eaten lunch. "It better be toilet trained, because I'm not going to be cleaning up after it."
Wufei snorted. "I don't believe cat's are toilet trained, Duo."
"That's not true. That guy on that movie did it. The one with the guy who like the girl who had the weird dad who had the crazy cat with the blue eyes named Jinx or something?"
My Chinese companion raised an eyebrow. "Meet the Parents?"
"Yeah, that was it. Good movie. Old, though. When did it come out? Hundred years ago? Two? Three and a half?" Wufei was ignoring me again. This time it did bother me a little. "Is this a girl cat or a boy cat?" I asked him. He stared at me.
"How am I supposed to know?"
"You could check."
"It's your cat."
"So what? You saw it first."
"I'm not going to check."
"Wufei..." The bell rang.
"You're going to be late for class," Wufei told me, standing up and depositing his tray in the trash. The cat was still nosing at my lunch, but I picked it up and tucked it under one arm, dumping my tray into the trash along with Wufei's. The cat squeaked indignantly, so I shifted so that I was carrying more or less like the people in movies did. I guess I was doing it right, because the cat started to purr.
"What am I supposed to do with it?"
"Put it in your dorm. Or take it to class with you. I'm sure your professor will enjoy it." With those final words, Wufei began to sprint up the stairwell to his own classroom.
"She'll probably eat it. With ketchup," I grumbled good-naturedly. But, as I didn't exactly want my newly acquired cat to run away if some idiot opened the door to my dorm room for my new room mate, I opened up my book bag and put it in there. I have one of those shoulder back packs, so I could see it fairly easily while I was making the long journey up the hallway and down the stairs The cat's little black and white nose peeked up out of the not-quite-closed bag, and I couldn't help but chuckle.
My English teacher smiled at me as I walked into the room. She really wasn't as bad as I made her out to be. I was even doing fairly well in her class, getting a low C, at least. She was young and timid, and because this was her first year teaching, I didn't really have the heart to fail her class. Something in my head told me it would just break her heart to have to fail a student, or to discipline one. Which was good, because she saw the cat I had stowed in my bag as I took my seat in the back of the room. Any of my other teachers would have thrown my bag- cat still inside- out of the window. Or so I believed, at the time.
Class started a mere two seconds after I had seated myself, and, while the teacher was talking, I took the cat out of my bag and set it on my lap. As long as no one else in the class saw it, everything would be okay. And it was quite likely that no one would see it, since I was the only one sitting in the back row. It seemed that the rest of my classmates were trying to avoid the pilot of Deathscythe. Or just all the Gundam pilots in general. And that was fine with me.
Class was about half way over when there was a knock on the door. I looked up from my cat (which I had discovered, more or less by accident, was a girl) to see just what it was that was delaying the lecture. The teacher crossed over and opened the door a crack, to see who was out there, then nodded her head and turned back to the class.
"I'll be right back," she told everyone in her pretty little voice. Then she went outside, into the hallway. I shrugged and went back to petting my cat, who was doing a fairly good job of purring quietly. Not good enough, I supposed, since one of my classmates turned around and sneered at me.
"Where'd you get the cat, Duo Maxwell?" he asked rapaciously. His name was Bodie, and he was probably the very definition of jock. Big shoulders, big muscles, and tiny brain.
I looked up at him and gave him a grade A crazy Duo grin. He faltered a bit, but not enough to back off. "Did you steal it? I heard you were a thief back where you come from," he continued, ignoring my glare.
I tilted my head a little, trying to get that innocent look Quatre always manages to pull off when he does that. "Do you even know where I'm from, Bodie?"
Bodie gave me a mean smile. "Hell, perhaps?"
"Perhaps." Before I could continue, the door opened again, and the teacher stepped back in, along with a teenage boy about half a foot shorter than I was. But it wasn't his height that really got to me, or the way the teacher was grinning madly at us, telling us all to welcome this guy as our new classmate. What really got to me was how he looked.
I inhaled a deep breath. "Heero...?" I murmured, not quite able to believe that this was happening. Then his eyes fell on me, and I saw that they weren't Heero's eyes at all. No, they were gold, not blue, and they showed not even the faintest flicker of recognition when they passed over me. I looked away and bit my lip, wishing the pain that was throwing itself against my heart would go away.
A tiny indignant squeak in my lap brought me back to my senses. In my mixture of surprise, shock, and rage, my grip had tightened on the kitten. She didn't like that at all. So I relaxed my hands and waited for the teacher to continue her speech. I know that the kitten appreciated it.
"Lon, would you like to tell everyone a little bit about yourself?"
The boy could have been Heero's twin, but for those eyes. "I am Lon Yao."
He said nothing but for that, although the rest of the class was waiting for him to say something else. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and glared at us all. I grinned. He was like Heero in more ways than one. Fate had put her cruel hand back in to torture poor me just a little bit more. But I couldn't let Fate win. Not yet, anyway. As long as I avoided this Lon character, I couldn't be pained too much.
The teacher cleared her throat. "Right. Lon, why don't you go sit next to Duo Maxwell?"
I cursed mentally. Never challenge Fate. She is a goddess more fickle than even Shinigami, and she's more than willing to prove it.
Lon took the seat next to me, and, as his gaze passed over the cat in my lap, I think I saw the faint beginnings of a smile. I also saw that his eyes weren't gold at all, but kind of a crazy kaleidoscope of greens, yellows, and grays. It was pretty cool, all in all.
As the teacher began to drone again, I leaned over and touched Lon's shoulder. "Hey, what dorm are you staying in?"
The glare he gave me was enough to rival any of Heero's death glares. I winced, more out of habit than of instinct, and scratched my cat behind her black ears. The corner of Lon's mouth was threatening to pull up into what was almost a smile. It was reassuring, in a way. After all, if you can make someone smile, you know they aren't totally in control of everything. That's the way I looked at things, anyway.
"This is my cat. You like her? You can pet her, if you want."
Lon didn't answer my question, though he did reach out a hand and stroked the kitten's back, but went on to ask one of his own. "What is her name?"
"I don't know yet. Maybe you can help me think of one later, okay? What dorm are you staying in?" I asked again. I figured he would have to answer me sooner or later.
Lon must have figured that out too, because he didn't even hesitate to answer me this time. Sure, his sentence was clipped and incomplete, but it was an answer no less. He was reminding me more and more of Heero as each second passed by. I didn't like that very much, and I was sincerely hoping that his dorm was on the opposite side of the school from mine. It would help my aching heart just a little if that was the case.
"213." I sighed to myself, knowing that, once again, Fate had taken hand. It really wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all, and I guess the way I was composing myself made my opinion on that quite obvious. Lon looked a bit puzzled at my reaction, and really, who could blame him?
"That's great," I told him with one of my genuinely fake grins. "You and I are going to be rooming together."
~tbc