NOTE TO READERS: If you are of a rigid religous mindset, and cannot handle any humourous situations involving Catholic religion, then DON'T read this fic as it does contain some jokes about Holy Water. I myself am Roman Catholic, and don't have a problem with it, but if you think you will be offended in any way, then don't read it and certainly don't flame me about it as I HAVE WARNED YOU.
SUMMARY: This is yet another continuation of my Blue's Clues/X-Men series, which are read in this order:
1. The X-Men get the Blues
2. The X-Men get the Blues (The Sequel)
3. Bob, the Newest X-Man
4. The Exorcist
It's not completely necessary to read the first three stories before attempting this one. However, there are occassional references contained within that you probably won't understand unless you've read the previous ones. But hey, it's entirely up to if you want to read them all or not. (But you would certainly make fuzzyblue's day if you did!)
Steve from the Blue's Clues show was killed off in the very first story, and now his ghost has come back to haunt the mansion and the X-Men want to get rid of him.
DISCLAIMER: Bwahahahahahahahaha!!! I have kidnapped ALL your X-Men! What're you gonna do about it, Marvel? Bwahahahahahahaha..oh...er...you've hired a team of lawyers? Best in the country? Um...okay...I'll make sure to put all the little X-guys back when I'm finished with them, okay? Whew.
THE EXORCIST
"Hey Blue!"
Hank's eyes shot open.
"Hey Blue!! What game are we going to play today?"
Hank rolled over and tried to bury his head under the pillow. "Not again," he groaned. It was the third time this week that Steve had woken him in the middle of the night, trying to make him play a game of Blue's Clues. Didn't he realize that Hank was tired from spending a whole week in a tree doing reconnaisance and desperately needed his sleep?
"Hey Blue!! What's your favorite game in the whole wide world?!"
"GO AWAY!!!" Hank shrieked, flipping over and whipping the pillow at the annoying little man. But, since Steve was in fact a ghost, the pillow flew right through him and knocked over the lamp on the desk. It shattered on the floor.
"DAMMIT!!!"
"Blue!!" cried Steve, horrified. "Watch your language!! There are little kids listening!"
Hank could feel tears of frustration stinging the corners of his eyes. "For the VERY last time, you clueless, pitiful excuse for a moron, I AM NOT BLUE!!! I may very well be that colour, and yes, I am rather furry, but I am NOT your dog! Now please take your personage elsewhere and LEAVE ME IN PEACE!!!"
Steve turned and started talking to the imaginary children. "Woah, kids! I think Blue is feeling a little...what? Yes! That's it! Frustrated! And what do we do when we feel frustrated?"
Steve paused while he waited for the children to answer him.
"Yes! We stop, take a deep breath, and think!" He turned back to Hank. "Okay Blue, now take a deep breath..."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Steve looked puzzled. "No, that wasn't quite right. Try it again, Blue!"
Hank spent the remainder of the night sobbing into his pillow while Steve danced and sang the "we are gonna play Blue's Clues" song over and over and over again.
* * *
"Why can you not have coffee in the morning like normal people?" Storm asked Logan with disdain.
Logan took a big gulp of his beer. "Cause that would ruin my reputation, darlin'."
They were sitting across from each other at the kitchen table. Jean, Rogue and Remy were also seated and eating breakfast. Scott was still at Nickelodean Studios, hosting the Blue's Clues show. Jubilee was sleeping in, and Bobby was eating his Sugar Bombs in the rec room in front of the TV.
Hank stormed into the kitchen. He scanned the room with bloodshot eyes nearly buried by the huge, black bags underneath them. He spotted Logan.
"What the hell happened to..." Logan began, but before he could finish, Hank had bounded across the room and grabbed him up and out of his seat by his shirt collar.
:WHY YOU...!!!" roared the Canuck, but Hank's reflexes proved to be faster than his. In an instant, he had one of Logan's arms pinned down with his foot, and had grabbed the other with his free hand and aimed the knuckles right at Logan's crotch.
"Go ahead," Hank crooned. "Unsheath those adamantium appendages, my dearest Canadian companion."
The others gasped, too shocked to speak.
Logan thought better of it and instead glared at the hulking mutant. "You better not let go, Furball," he seethed, "cause when ya do, ya ain't gonna live long enough to regret it."
"Tut, tut. A paltry threat compared to the one I am about to bestow upon you."
Logan raised an eyebrow.
"For the last three nights now, I have been haunted - yes, haunted - by the infinitely annoying ghost of Steve, and I am holding YOU Logan, as the one responsible for that situation AND my current state of sleep deprivation and near-insanity. For you see, Logan, YOU are the one who decided to skewer the man in the first place, thereby rendering his ghost free to walk the mansion night after excruciatingly tortuous night. Therefore, YOU are the one who is going to get rid of him. I do not know how you will do it, nor do I particularly care, but you WILL do it. Or else."
"Or else what?" Logan sneered.
"I will take it upon myself to determine just how many pieces your beloved Harley can be dismantled into."
More gasps of shocked surprise.
"You wouldn't dare."
"Oh yes, I would."
Logan could see by the manic look in Hank's eyes that the furry mutant was in fact serious. And even if he did kill Hank for wrecking his bike, he would still have to put it back together again. He had no choice.
"Alright, Blue."
A dangerously red sheen passed momentarily over Hank's normally blue eyes. "Do. Not. Call. Me. That," he warned, searing venom bubbling underneath every carefully pronounced word.
Logan blinked in surprise. In all the years he had known Hank, he had never, ever seen the man in this state, not even during that one week in which Bobby managed to blow up his lab four days in a row. Maybe he had better do something about it, after all.
"Alright, Hank."
Hank dropped him and bounded out of the room.
* * *
Oh my! What is Logan going to do? Will Hank ever get any rest? Will they ever evict Steve from the mansion? Send in your reviews if you wanna find out! Thanks!
SUMMARY: This is yet another continuation of my Blue's Clues/X-Men series, which are read in this order:
1. The X-Men get the Blues
2. The X-Men get the Blues (The Sequel)
3. Bob, the Newest X-Man
4. The Exorcist
It's not completely necessary to read the first three stories before attempting this one. However, there are occassional references contained within that you probably won't understand unless you've read the previous ones. But hey, it's entirely up to if you want to read them all or not. (But you would certainly make fuzzyblue's day if you did!)
Steve from the Blue's Clues show was killed off in the very first story, and now his ghost has come back to haunt the mansion and the X-Men want to get rid of him.
DISCLAIMER: Bwahahahahahahahaha!!! I have kidnapped ALL your X-Men! What're you gonna do about it, Marvel? Bwahahahahahahaha..oh...er...you've hired a team of lawyers? Best in the country? Um...okay...I'll make sure to put all the little X-guys back when I'm finished with them, okay? Whew.
THE EXORCIST
"Hey Blue!"
Hank's eyes shot open.
"Hey Blue!! What game are we going to play today?"
Hank rolled over and tried to bury his head under the pillow. "Not again," he groaned. It was the third time this week that Steve had woken him in the middle of the night, trying to make him play a game of Blue's Clues. Didn't he realize that Hank was tired from spending a whole week in a tree doing reconnaisance and desperately needed his sleep?
"Hey Blue!! What's your favorite game in the whole wide world?!"
"GO AWAY!!!" Hank shrieked, flipping over and whipping the pillow at the annoying little man. But, since Steve was in fact a ghost, the pillow flew right through him and knocked over the lamp on the desk. It shattered on the floor.
"DAMMIT!!!"
"Blue!!" cried Steve, horrified. "Watch your language!! There are little kids listening!"
Hank could feel tears of frustration stinging the corners of his eyes. "For the VERY last time, you clueless, pitiful excuse for a moron, I AM NOT BLUE!!! I may very well be that colour, and yes, I am rather furry, but I am NOT your dog! Now please take your personage elsewhere and LEAVE ME IN PEACE!!!"
Steve turned and started talking to the imaginary children. "Woah, kids! I think Blue is feeling a little...what? Yes! That's it! Frustrated! And what do we do when we feel frustrated?"
Steve paused while he waited for the children to answer him.
"Yes! We stop, take a deep breath, and think!" He turned back to Hank. "Okay Blue, now take a deep breath..."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Steve looked puzzled. "No, that wasn't quite right. Try it again, Blue!"
Hank spent the remainder of the night sobbing into his pillow while Steve danced and sang the "we are gonna play Blue's Clues" song over and over and over again.
* * *
"Why can you not have coffee in the morning like normal people?" Storm asked Logan with disdain.
Logan took a big gulp of his beer. "Cause that would ruin my reputation, darlin'."
They were sitting across from each other at the kitchen table. Jean, Rogue and Remy were also seated and eating breakfast. Scott was still at Nickelodean Studios, hosting the Blue's Clues show. Jubilee was sleeping in, and Bobby was eating his Sugar Bombs in the rec room in front of the TV.
Hank stormed into the kitchen. He scanned the room with bloodshot eyes nearly buried by the huge, black bags underneath them. He spotted Logan.
"What the hell happened to..." Logan began, but before he could finish, Hank had bounded across the room and grabbed him up and out of his seat by his shirt collar.
:WHY YOU...!!!" roared the Canuck, but Hank's reflexes proved to be faster than his. In an instant, he had one of Logan's arms pinned down with his foot, and had grabbed the other with his free hand and aimed the knuckles right at Logan's crotch.
"Go ahead," Hank crooned. "Unsheath those adamantium appendages, my dearest Canadian companion."
The others gasped, too shocked to speak.
Logan thought better of it and instead glared at the hulking mutant. "You better not let go, Furball," he seethed, "cause when ya do, ya ain't gonna live long enough to regret it."
"Tut, tut. A paltry threat compared to the one I am about to bestow upon you."
Logan raised an eyebrow.
"For the last three nights now, I have been haunted - yes, haunted - by the infinitely annoying ghost of Steve, and I am holding YOU Logan, as the one responsible for that situation AND my current state of sleep deprivation and near-insanity. For you see, Logan, YOU are the one who decided to skewer the man in the first place, thereby rendering his ghost free to walk the mansion night after excruciatingly tortuous night. Therefore, YOU are the one who is going to get rid of him. I do not know how you will do it, nor do I particularly care, but you WILL do it. Or else."
"Or else what?" Logan sneered.
"I will take it upon myself to determine just how many pieces your beloved Harley can be dismantled into."
More gasps of shocked surprise.
"You wouldn't dare."
"Oh yes, I would."
Logan could see by the manic look in Hank's eyes that the furry mutant was in fact serious. And even if he did kill Hank for wrecking his bike, he would still have to put it back together again. He had no choice.
"Alright, Blue."
A dangerously red sheen passed momentarily over Hank's normally blue eyes. "Do. Not. Call. Me. That," he warned, searing venom bubbling underneath every carefully pronounced word.
Logan blinked in surprise. In all the years he had known Hank, he had never, ever seen the man in this state, not even during that one week in which Bobby managed to blow up his lab four days in a row. Maybe he had better do something about it, after all.
"Alright, Hank."
Hank dropped him and bounded out of the room.
* * *
Oh my! What is Logan going to do? Will Hank ever get any rest? Will they ever evict Steve from the mansion? Send in your reviews if you wanna find out! Thanks!