Disclaimer: Tolkien owns LOTR and all things Middle Earth, blah blah blah.
A/N: Want to say thanks to everyone who reviewed because it shows that you kept coming back to check if I had updated. That's very encouraging to me. =) Also, thanks to those of you who point out things that could be improved on and spelling errors. As much as I proof my work and use the spell checker, things always get past me. Dang those synonyms!
Chapter 33 - Reality Sinks In
Alania took several weeks to fully regain her strength. Though she would always bear a small scar at her side, physically she was none worse for her ordeal. As the weeks wore on, she kept herself busy by helping Aerdin with his plans for rebuilding the city and for the celebration festival he had planned for several weeks later. At first she was escorted by one of the elves or Gandalf as she toured the ruined parts of the city, but gradually, as her strength returned, she took it upon herself to examine the citizens needs more closely and reported them back to Aerdin.
The city's people had taken to her and she was bombarded with gifts from them, ranging from fruit to clothing to crafts. Alania was overwhelmed with the gifts, and wasn't entirely sure why they were sent to her. On one level she understood their reasoning, but she couldn't comprehend why they would pay respects only to her actions during battle when so many others had been as brave and had died. Therefore, she made sure to distribute the gifts to those families who had lost their possessions and relatives.
While Alania's days were slowly filled with tasks from Aerdin as she grew stronger, her late afternoons were saved for her friends and her nights for Legolas. Though the grand majority of Middle Earth rejoiced in the demise of Malficent, Alania found that she benefited in only one way from the whole nightmare; she would wake up every morning with her elf by her side. And while this fact made her heart race, it also served as a reminder that their time together was running out as she had always intended to go home. The pull to return home was growing stronger, and it caused her to feel guilty with the idea that she was being selfish. It was becoming a need, rather than a simple want. Alania slowly began to distance herself from those around her as her thoughts drifted homeward; as though she were half way there and that it would make saying goodbye easier. She attempted to keep as busy as possible and spoke to no one of her thoughts.
Legolas knew that Alania's mind was unfocused and confused. She had yet to face the full impact of everything she had been through. He had tried to speak with her once about it and she brushed him off abruptly. He made it clear that he was there for her and would wait for her to approach him if she needed to talk, but she remained silent.
As the festival celebrations closed in on them, Alania grew more and more irritated and angered easily. That her friends expressed concern for her mood swings only made her more brusque.
On the first evening of festivities, Alania had attempted to soothe her nerves with a long bath before dressing. She and Legolas had agreed that Aerdin escort her on the first night, and therefore Legolas had already gone down to help with any last minute needs. She had been surprised when Aerdin had made the request and when she asked why, he responded "It would be an honor for me to have the one who risked her life for mine on my arm. Of course, I would understand if you refused." The question had been put so casually that Alania had almost refused him. Instead she had asked to discuss it with Legolas first, and the elf had surprised her when he expressed shock that she hadn't agreed immediately.
Alania donned the gown that Aerdin had gifted to her and as she fixed her hair into place, her mind strayed to what the city was celebrating. She could hear the whole city coming alive with excitement over the next few days, and lively music could be heard in the air. Without a thought to what she was doing, Alania found herself walking out of the keep and to graves of those who had perished in the fighting.
She had no idea how long she stood there, her mind vacant of conscious thought. Alania was only vaguely aware that the sun had sunk low in the sky and that Aerdin was likely looking for her. Still she could not move from the spot. Looking to the right and left, she saw rows of graves of the young men who had died. And though music still rang in the air, it was only a distant hum where she stood and all else was silent.
Aerdin had indeed been looking for her, but when she was not located in her rooms he was informed by a guard of the direction she went. Knowing that her mind was troubled he headed off to find her. When he spotted her at the graves, he watched and left her alone for a time. It was when the sun had sunk low that he approached her.
"Are you alright Alania?" he asked quietly.
"I'm fine, Aerdin. I just needed to come here for a bit. I'm sorry if I worried you" she replied abruptly.
"Are you sure? If you need to talk."
"I said I am fine! I am sick and tired of everyone constantly asking me this" she bit out. Taking a deep breath as she realized how cold she sounded, she said "I am sorry Aerdin. I didn't mean to bite your head off. I am fine, truly. Come. Let us join the celebration before people start to whisper."
Taking his arm, Alania allowed Aerdin to walk her back to the keep and into the Grand Hall. She kept a smile plastered on her face and listened with only half an ear to Aerdin. Her mind still dwelled at the graves. Upon entering the Grand Hall, Alania was distracted enough by the decorations and beauty of the room to focus on it for a short time.
As the king entered, he paused at the entrance of the room with Alania as a chorus of 'Huzzahs' erupted along with a round of heartfelt applause. Aerdin bowed in reciprocity to his guests and Alania followed suite with a curtsy of her own. And then the most startling thing Alania had ever seen happened. Aerdin stepped away from Alania and in front of the entire room knelt before her and bowed his head. Taking their cue from their king, the room fell silent and also bowed to her.
Alania looked around the room and back at Aerdin in a mass of confusion and a bit of mortification. Glancing at her friends, she was astonished to see that even Legolas was kneeling. Only Roxy was still upright and as wide- eyed with shock as Alania.
Alania bent down close to Aerdin and whispered "Um, what in the world are you doing?! Get up!"
Aerdin looked up at her in complete surprise. It was clear that Alania had no clue of the honor the city was bestowing upon her. "My lady, we are merely showing the one who risked her life for the king and his land their utmost gratitude. It was you who gave our enemy his final blow. Had it not been for your cunning and bravery, all of Middle Earth would be under Malficent's control."
Alania turned to Roxy and when their eyes met, Roxy answered Alania's questioning look with a shrug. Alania had not at all been ready for this kind of attention, nor did she want it or feel she deserved it. Seconds ticked by and the discomfort she felt with the situation at hand compounded with her confusion and anger that had been building the past few weeks. She exploded in anger.
"Gratitude?! You are thanking me? Are you all daft? I was thrown into a situation that I had no hand in creating and dealt with it the only way I knew how. That I threw myself at you when I saw an arrow aimed at you was sheer reaction on my part. I had no intention of get hit by it! There was nothing I did on that battle field that any one of those men and boys who died wouldn't have done and did do. They truly sacrificed for you and your kingdom and Middle Earth. If you want to show your gratitude, show it to those who are buried and their families. They are the real heroes." Turning to Gandalf, she said pointedly "I was merely a pawn in a game someone else played." With tears streaming down her face, Alania turned and left the hall.
Aerdin slowly stood and turned towards Legolas with concern. Nodding to him with understanding, Legolas left to find her. Roxy walked to Aerdin, smiled softly and said "I'll apologize for her right now. She's not herself, you know. We don't see that kind of thing where we come from, and I think she wasn't ready for it. She'll be alright, you'll see. Then she'll come back and apologize herself."
Aerdin returned Roxy's smile and nodded to his musicians to start up a tune, effectively livening the mood. Holding his hand to Roxy, she joined him in place of Alania for a first dance.
Georn watched Roxy and Aerdin for a short time, then left to look for Alania himself. He had a fairly good idea of where she had gone to from the year he spent with her alone, and knew that it was the last place the elf would search.
The shape-shifter climbed the stairs to the large turret balcony slowly to confirm if the elf had already reached her. When he heard no sign of Legolas, Georn did something he hadn't done a in long while - he shifted to the form he had taken when he first met Alania. He remembered how comforting she found it to have the dog around when she was upset, and so he offered it to her now.
Alania had run up the stairs hard and fast, trying to out-distance the emotional onslaught she knew was coming. She reached the top breathing heavily and still the dam broke. In her mind she replayed every horrific and terrifying moment of the triage area and final battle. She kept seeing Malficent's head as it was hit with her bullet in her mind quickly followed by the panic she felt when she saw the arrow aimed at Aerdin. The weight of it made her sink to her knees in an agony of crying. Her mouth was open with silent screams and she clutched her stomach with the pain she felt in her gut. Long minutes passed this way until the initial barrage of heaving sobs passed and turned into something a bit more controllable. Her side ached with her wound and she couldn't support herself on her knees any longer, so she leaned up against the cold stone of the turret and pulled her knees up to her chest. Wrapping her arms around her legs, she leaned her head on her knees and allowed the tears to flow freely.
Sensing that someone was at the entrance of the balcony, she looked up and couldn't help but give Georn a small smile as he approached her. She lowered her legs to cross them and Georn placed his head on her lap and looked up at her, silently giving her comfort with his brown dog eyes. Alania shook her head and laughed mirthlessly as she pet her old dog and attempted to get a handle on her out-of-control emotions.
Legolas found them a short time later and was glad to see that Georn had found her and kept her company and gave her some comfort. Georn raised his head as Legolas approached and gave Alania a small lick on her cheek before padding away and returning to Roxy's side.
Alania looked up at Legolas when he neared and her tears started anew seeing the magnificent elf above her. She reached up with both arms, silently asking to be held and Legolas sank down near her and pulled her into his lap. Alania cried with her face buried in his shoulder and he calmly rubbed her back until her sobs slowed once more.
Alania took a deep breath and pulled away to face Legolas. "I hate it here. With every fiber of my being, I despise this place. I want to go home, Legolas. The only thing that would keep me here is you, my elf. And I am afraid and terribly sorry that it isn't enough. I didn't want any of this and I have spent close to year here; most likely will spend over a year by the time we get back to Rivendell. I ask only one thing now, and it is the very least you can do for me. Please, love, let me go home" she begged, tears still brimming in her eyes.
His heart grew heavy in his chest, but as Legolas looked at her he understood her need and knew he could not refuse her. Cupping her face he leaned down and placed a loving kiss on her lips, which she returned. They sat a bit longer until Alania's eyes had dried. As they stood, Legolas said "If you are up to it, let us clean ourselves up and make an appearance in the hall. Aerdin will be much relieved to see you are alright." At Alania's nod, they walked back to their room so she could wash her face before leading her back to the party.
As they approached the Grand Hall, Legolas paused and turned to her. "I love you Alania. There is nothing I would not do for your happiness. I will take you home, little sprite. We will leave in a few days."
Alania threw her arms around him with a combination of relief and joy, then allowed him to escort her in and lead her in the first of several dances she participated in that night with her spirits much higher than they had been in a long time.
******
Only a few more chapters to go folks, so why not drop me a review, eh? Thanks
A/N: Want to say thanks to everyone who reviewed because it shows that you kept coming back to check if I had updated. That's very encouraging to me. =) Also, thanks to those of you who point out things that could be improved on and spelling errors. As much as I proof my work and use the spell checker, things always get past me. Dang those synonyms!
Chapter 33 - Reality Sinks In
Alania took several weeks to fully regain her strength. Though she would always bear a small scar at her side, physically she was none worse for her ordeal. As the weeks wore on, she kept herself busy by helping Aerdin with his plans for rebuilding the city and for the celebration festival he had planned for several weeks later. At first she was escorted by one of the elves or Gandalf as she toured the ruined parts of the city, but gradually, as her strength returned, she took it upon herself to examine the citizens needs more closely and reported them back to Aerdin.
The city's people had taken to her and she was bombarded with gifts from them, ranging from fruit to clothing to crafts. Alania was overwhelmed with the gifts, and wasn't entirely sure why they were sent to her. On one level she understood their reasoning, but she couldn't comprehend why they would pay respects only to her actions during battle when so many others had been as brave and had died. Therefore, she made sure to distribute the gifts to those families who had lost their possessions and relatives.
While Alania's days were slowly filled with tasks from Aerdin as she grew stronger, her late afternoons were saved for her friends and her nights for Legolas. Though the grand majority of Middle Earth rejoiced in the demise of Malficent, Alania found that she benefited in only one way from the whole nightmare; she would wake up every morning with her elf by her side. And while this fact made her heart race, it also served as a reminder that their time together was running out as she had always intended to go home. The pull to return home was growing stronger, and it caused her to feel guilty with the idea that she was being selfish. It was becoming a need, rather than a simple want. Alania slowly began to distance herself from those around her as her thoughts drifted homeward; as though she were half way there and that it would make saying goodbye easier. She attempted to keep as busy as possible and spoke to no one of her thoughts.
Legolas knew that Alania's mind was unfocused and confused. She had yet to face the full impact of everything she had been through. He had tried to speak with her once about it and she brushed him off abruptly. He made it clear that he was there for her and would wait for her to approach him if she needed to talk, but she remained silent.
As the festival celebrations closed in on them, Alania grew more and more irritated and angered easily. That her friends expressed concern for her mood swings only made her more brusque.
On the first evening of festivities, Alania had attempted to soothe her nerves with a long bath before dressing. She and Legolas had agreed that Aerdin escort her on the first night, and therefore Legolas had already gone down to help with any last minute needs. She had been surprised when Aerdin had made the request and when she asked why, he responded "It would be an honor for me to have the one who risked her life for mine on my arm. Of course, I would understand if you refused." The question had been put so casually that Alania had almost refused him. Instead she had asked to discuss it with Legolas first, and the elf had surprised her when he expressed shock that she hadn't agreed immediately.
Alania donned the gown that Aerdin had gifted to her and as she fixed her hair into place, her mind strayed to what the city was celebrating. She could hear the whole city coming alive with excitement over the next few days, and lively music could be heard in the air. Without a thought to what she was doing, Alania found herself walking out of the keep and to graves of those who had perished in the fighting.
She had no idea how long she stood there, her mind vacant of conscious thought. Alania was only vaguely aware that the sun had sunk low in the sky and that Aerdin was likely looking for her. Still she could not move from the spot. Looking to the right and left, she saw rows of graves of the young men who had died. And though music still rang in the air, it was only a distant hum where she stood and all else was silent.
Aerdin had indeed been looking for her, but when she was not located in her rooms he was informed by a guard of the direction she went. Knowing that her mind was troubled he headed off to find her. When he spotted her at the graves, he watched and left her alone for a time. It was when the sun had sunk low that he approached her.
"Are you alright Alania?" he asked quietly.
"I'm fine, Aerdin. I just needed to come here for a bit. I'm sorry if I worried you" she replied abruptly.
"Are you sure? If you need to talk."
"I said I am fine! I am sick and tired of everyone constantly asking me this" she bit out. Taking a deep breath as she realized how cold she sounded, she said "I am sorry Aerdin. I didn't mean to bite your head off. I am fine, truly. Come. Let us join the celebration before people start to whisper."
Taking his arm, Alania allowed Aerdin to walk her back to the keep and into the Grand Hall. She kept a smile plastered on her face and listened with only half an ear to Aerdin. Her mind still dwelled at the graves. Upon entering the Grand Hall, Alania was distracted enough by the decorations and beauty of the room to focus on it for a short time.
As the king entered, he paused at the entrance of the room with Alania as a chorus of 'Huzzahs' erupted along with a round of heartfelt applause. Aerdin bowed in reciprocity to his guests and Alania followed suite with a curtsy of her own. And then the most startling thing Alania had ever seen happened. Aerdin stepped away from Alania and in front of the entire room knelt before her and bowed his head. Taking their cue from their king, the room fell silent and also bowed to her.
Alania looked around the room and back at Aerdin in a mass of confusion and a bit of mortification. Glancing at her friends, she was astonished to see that even Legolas was kneeling. Only Roxy was still upright and as wide- eyed with shock as Alania.
Alania bent down close to Aerdin and whispered "Um, what in the world are you doing?! Get up!"
Aerdin looked up at her in complete surprise. It was clear that Alania had no clue of the honor the city was bestowing upon her. "My lady, we are merely showing the one who risked her life for the king and his land their utmost gratitude. It was you who gave our enemy his final blow. Had it not been for your cunning and bravery, all of Middle Earth would be under Malficent's control."
Alania turned to Roxy and when their eyes met, Roxy answered Alania's questioning look with a shrug. Alania had not at all been ready for this kind of attention, nor did she want it or feel she deserved it. Seconds ticked by and the discomfort she felt with the situation at hand compounded with her confusion and anger that had been building the past few weeks. She exploded in anger.
"Gratitude?! You are thanking me? Are you all daft? I was thrown into a situation that I had no hand in creating and dealt with it the only way I knew how. That I threw myself at you when I saw an arrow aimed at you was sheer reaction on my part. I had no intention of get hit by it! There was nothing I did on that battle field that any one of those men and boys who died wouldn't have done and did do. They truly sacrificed for you and your kingdom and Middle Earth. If you want to show your gratitude, show it to those who are buried and their families. They are the real heroes." Turning to Gandalf, she said pointedly "I was merely a pawn in a game someone else played." With tears streaming down her face, Alania turned and left the hall.
Aerdin slowly stood and turned towards Legolas with concern. Nodding to him with understanding, Legolas left to find her. Roxy walked to Aerdin, smiled softly and said "I'll apologize for her right now. She's not herself, you know. We don't see that kind of thing where we come from, and I think she wasn't ready for it. She'll be alright, you'll see. Then she'll come back and apologize herself."
Aerdin returned Roxy's smile and nodded to his musicians to start up a tune, effectively livening the mood. Holding his hand to Roxy, she joined him in place of Alania for a first dance.
Georn watched Roxy and Aerdin for a short time, then left to look for Alania himself. He had a fairly good idea of where she had gone to from the year he spent with her alone, and knew that it was the last place the elf would search.
The shape-shifter climbed the stairs to the large turret balcony slowly to confirm if the elf had already reached her. When he heard no sign of Legolas, Georn did something he hadn't done a in long while - he shifted to the form he had taken when he first met Alania. He remembered how comforting she found it to have the dog around when she was upset, and so he offered it to her now.
Alania had run up the stairs hard and fast, trying to out-distance the emotional onslaught she knew was coming. She reached the top breathing heavily and still the dam broke. In her mind she replayed every horrific and terrifying moment of the triage area and final battle. She kept seeing Malficent's head as it was hit with her bullet in her mind quickly followed by the panic she felt when she saw the arrow aimed at Aerdin. The weight of it made her sink to her knees in an agony of crying. Her mouth was open with silent screams and she clutched her stomach with the pain she felt in her gut. Long minutes passed this way until the initial barrage of heaving sobs passed and turned into something a bit more controllable. Her side ached with her wound and she couldn't support herself on her knees any longer, so she leaned up against the cold stone of the turret and pulled her knees up to her chest. Wrapping her arms around her legs, she leaned her head on her knees and allowed the tears to flow freely.
Sensing that someone was at the entrance of the balcony, she looked up and couldn't help but give Georn a small smile as he approached her. She lowered her legs to cross them and Georn placed his head on her lap and looked up at her, silently giving her comfort with his brown dog eyes. Alania shook her head and laughed mirthlessly as she pet her old dog and attempted to get a handle on her out-of-control emotions.
Legolas found them a short time later and was glad to see that Georn had found her and kept her company and gave her some comfort. Georn raised his head as Legolas approached and gave Alania a small lick on her cheek before padding away and returning to Roxy's side.
Alania looked up at Legolas when he neared and her tears started anew seeing the magnificent elf above her. She reached up with both arms, silently asking to be held and Legolas sank down near her and pulled her into his lap. Alania cried with her face buried in his shoulder and he calmly rubbed her back until her sobs slowed once more.
Alania took a deep breath and pulled away to face Legolas. "I hate it here. With every fiber of my being, I despise this place. I want to go home, Legolas. The only thing that would keep me here is you, my elf. And I am afraid and terribly sorry that it isn't enough. I didn't want any of this and I have spent close to year here; most likely will spend over a year by the time we get back to Rivendell. I ask only one thing now, and it is the very least you can do for me. Please, love, let me go home" she begged, tears still brimming in her eyes.
His heart grew heavy in his chest, but as Legolas looked at her he understood her need and knew he could not refuse her. Cupping her face he leaned down and placed a loving kiss on her lips, which she returned. They sat a bit longer until Alania's eyes had dried. As they stood, Legolas said "If you are up to it, let us clean ourselves up and make an appearance in the hall. Aerdin will be much relieved to see you are alright." At Alania's nod, they walked back to their room so she could wash her face before leading her back to the party.
As they approached the Grand Hall, Legolas paused and turned to her. "I love you Alania. There is nothing I would not do for your happiness. I will take you home, little sprite. We will leave in a few days."
Alania threw her arms around him with a combination of relief and joy, then allowed him to escort her in and lead her in the first of several dances she participated in that night with her spirits much higher than they had been in a long time.
******
Only a few more chapters to go folks, so why not drop me a review, eh? Thanks