A/N: This is just a product of me trying to cross my two favourite obsessions: Monty Python and Harry Potter. Hehe… they might even run across some of my other obsessions in here somewhere… just wait and see. Ummm... sorry the first chapter is so short, I promise to make the other ones a lot longer. Mind you, I'm not going to waste my time and continue if none of you review. **cough cough, nudge nudge** Anyway, just read it. Hehe
~~Alicia Weasley
Disclaimer: No one, not Harry, not Hermione, not Ron, not Monty, not any of the Sirs… not King Arthur… no one, belongs to me. All the Harry stuff and people belong to my heroine and mentor J.K. Rowling, King Arthur belongs to himself I guess, and the Sirs belong to themselves also. The other Monty Python stuff belongs to the Monty Python gang, John Cleese et al. Because I don't feel like writing all their names. So ha.
And Now For….
~*Ronald Weasley and the Holy Grail!*~
"Hey guys!" Harry called out to Ron and Hermione as he rounded the corner of the hall. They were talking in low voices about something.
"Hi, Harry..." Ron mumbled.
"Hello," Hermione said.
"What's wrong?" Harry asked.
"Oh, nothing's really... wrong... just.... weird." Hermione said.
"Well then, what's weird?" Harry corrected himself.
"Ron, maybe you should tell him, it is your... erm..." Hermione searched for the right word.
"Quest," Ron finished. He finally looked up. "Harry, you're not going to believe me, but..."
"Try me," Harry said patiently.
Ron took a deep breath.
"Oh, honestly. You're not pregnant or anything, are you?" Harry asked.
Several people stopped and stared. The hall got unbelievably quiet.
"Maybe we should talk about this somewhere else," Ron mumbled, and dragged Harry and Hermione along with him.
When they arrived in the common room, they all plopped into three overstuffed chairs.
Ron glared at Harry.
"You didn't have to be so loud." He hissed.
"Sorry, but please tell me what's going on."
Ron sighed. "Okay... well... yesterday, after Quidditch practice, you ran off to charms, Harry. But I stayed behind. I just wanted to wander around a bit longer, you know, clear my head sort of."
"Okay, I don't see anything weird so far..." Harry interrupted.
"And you're not if you don't keep quiet," he warned. "Anyway, I was just coming past that fountain... the one with the statue of Godric Gryffindor, when this beam of light was all of a sudden shining on me. I looked up, and I saw..." he looked around. "God."
"Gasp!" Harry said.
"No! That's not all! He gave me a quest.... to... erm... find... erm..." Ron scratched his head in thought.
"The Holy Grail." said Hermione.
"Yeah! That's it!" Ron said.
Harry stared in awe. God must have thought he already had too much to deal with to try and find some royal cup.
"What's the Holy Grail?" Harry said, getting his speech back.
"It's the goblet that Jesus drank out of at The Last Supper." Hermione stated.
"Oh," Harry mumbled. Then he lashed out at all the people who think that he worships the Devil. "See?" he yelled. He pointed at Hermione. "I bet all you stupid Muggles didn't even know that! Ha!"
Hermione put her hand on Harry to calm him down.
"Sorry. But wasn't that already found? By... erm... King... King Arthur and somebody?"
"No, they failed at the last minute." Hermione told him. "Now it's up to us to find it."
"But... but... King Arthur had more people! Sir Lancelot... Sir Galahad..." Harry counted on his fingers. "Sir Robin... Sir...erm..."
"Well... they weren't magical!" Ron spoke up for the first time since explaining what happened.
"That's right! We'll blow those... erm... gee... whatever gets in our way to smithereens!" Harry said. He was really getting worked up over this thing.
Ron stood up, a beam of light shining down on him. " With the..." he produced something from his pocket. "Holy Handgrenade!" **Bum, ba da bum bum bum bum, ba da bum bum bum bum, ba da bum bum bum bummmmmmmmmm!!!**
"Where did that come from?" Hermione asked, looking around for the source of the light and the music.
Ron shrugged.
"It was just all of a sudden in my pocket," he said.
"What are we going to need for all of this? Will Dumbledore even let us go? Are we old enough? Will we need minstrels?" Harry asked.
Ron shrugged again.
"I'll ask Dumbledore, if God chose us, I guess we're old enough, and my cousin has a few minstrels, I'm sure he'd let us borrow them," Ron said.
"When do we start?" asked Hermione.
"I guess as soon as we can," said Ron. "Better get a good night's sleep!" he added cheerfully.
"Why did I have to meet you on that train? Why didn't I shake hands with Draco? Why, why why?" Harry groaned.
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A/N: Now, if you want me to continue, REVIEW! Or even if you don't, flames are welcome. The more reviews I get, the faster I'll write. So REVIEW! Now!