When Elena entered the kitchen with Damon behind her she knew something was not right. Stefan was no longer sitting at the table, arrogantly sneering or behaving the way she had seen him only a little while before. In fact, he

wasn't even there.

Elena felt panic in her stomach as she turned to Damon. "Damon....Where is Stefan?"

He looked at the table, then glanced back to her. His dark eyes burned. "I told him to wait here."

"Oh God, Damon. He could be out there killing again!" Elena's voice was shaking.

"I'll get Bonnie." Elena started for the hall as Damon reached out to stop her.

"No, don't. She's obviously not able to deal with it. I think it'd be better if we just went to look for him."

Elena sighed. "You're right."

Damon nodded, casting his mind out to locate his brother's. Elena didn't speak.

A minute or two passed and Damon finally spoke. "Something's wrong. I can't quite place what it is."

"Well, where is he?" Elena questioned, her blue eyes wide.

"He's in the woods, at the park down the road."

"Are you sure something's wrong? I mean, what in the world would he be doing there...?"

"People go to a park, my dear."

She laughed slightly. "Yeah. I'm sorry, I'm a mess right now."

He smiled at her-- and it was a rare thing-- for he normally was flashing a devilish grin or smirk. She leaned up to kiss him gently.

Damon smoothed a hand over her hair and said, "We should get going."

Elena smiled weakly. "I know."

For a moment she lay her head against his. Then, she stepped back, and together they left in search of Stefan.

__________________________

Stefan touched the ring on his middle finger as he stood in the wooded area of the local park.

Revulsion made his insides churn and he doubled over. "I killed innocent people. God knows how many I killed for my own needs...." he moaned, falling to his knees in the plush grass.

How could I have done that? he asked himself, disgustedly. He felt like he could die. And at that moment, he felt he had no right to live. He stayed like the for a while, the midday sun beating down on his back.

He was so confused, so lost. Only a little while ago he'd been on some wild killing spree, burning hunger and driving need coursing through his veins. The blood, the life, the want, making him crazy, calling to him. And he had

not denied it.

He had wanted it. Craved it. Like some starving man before a feast.

He, Stefan Salvatore, had killed many today. Without thinking. Without mercy.

Without a care.

And yet, here he was. Like his old self. Guilt ridden and nerve wracked over something he had done.

He didn't get it. He felt torn. As though any moment he might snap, costing the people in the park a few yards away their lives. He didn't understand it, and he didn't care. All he knew was that people were dead. And it was because

of him.

Stefan stood, slowly rising to his feet as he lifted pained green eyes to the fiery sun above. He touched the ring he wore, twisted it around his finger as his eyes fell back to it, studying the blue gem that glinted in the light.

He thought of Elena, and of Bonnie. Of how he must have hurt them. He thought of how sickened they probably were with him and he shut his eyes.

"I don't deserve life when I took it from so many others...." he whispered and as he stood in the park, the sunlight drifting down in hot rays through the trees he went to pull the ring off.

And then there was a cry.

"NO! STEFAN!"

It was Elena.

He'd been stupid. He sighed, realizing truth. She, of all people, would never give up hope for him. She'd never turn her back on him, no matter if they weren't together. So why should he give up on himself?

Damon was with her. But his brother didn't speak.

Stefan didn't turn. He bowed his head. He couldn't bare to face her at that moment. Either of them for that matter. Quickly, he blended into the darkness, casting one thought to each of their minds. *Thank you*