Things to know before reading:

--Yes, I know absolutely nothing about horseback riding. At least, I didn't when I first wrote this…now, in the super-duper edited edition, some of my mistakes like how I said 'jiggling the reins made the horse go faster' are corrected. Since, as Yue-chan informs me, jiggling the reins actually makes the horse stop. ^-^()

Kismet of a Changechild

Chapter V

By Aura Kage

He hated having to do it, but he had to…and still, he felt guilty inserting those false memories into the Changechild's mind…enough to calm her down a bit, and stop her Empathy from going out of control again.

So now Dawnshadow had memories of meeting Kelvren, shrouded in all his gryphonic magnificence, and being faintly scared but being reassured by her Companion that all was well. And all precautions would be taken from scaring the Changechild out of her wits again, though none of them really knew how far past her memories went…and didn't feel like finding out.

:Wake up…Dawnshadow,: Kyrrith said, sounding in great difficulty. The Companion mind-tapped her awake, and the Changechild stirred, eyes clouded and staring blankly into space. Then they focused, and Dawnshadow sat up on the bed, blinking and giving a loud yawn…which exposed two sharp canines that seemed both strange and normal in her form.

"Ooohh…I…" she moaned, rubbing her forehead as if it hurt. Kelvren leaned over experimentally, and the Changechild blinked at him and then extended a hand to scratch affectionately behind his eartufts. "I am so sorry, Kelvren, for dozing off like that…"

"Forrrgiven," Kelvren replied lightly, withdrawing politely. He turned to look at Darian, and both exchanged a subtle look of guilt and discomfort before turning their attention to Kyrrith.

"Now, time for interrrogatsssion…"

~

Another day. Snowsong sighed as he looked out his window, down at the Changechild who was trying to swing her leg over her Companion to mount, and was ending up hopping on one leg while her hands clutched the poor thing's mane for dear life. The Companion snorted and shook his head, shaking off Dawnshadow, who promptly crashed to the ground, soiling her Tayledras-made outfit of swirling midnight blues and deep purples and a flash of silver here and there, winking out everytime she made a movement. Ever since the hertasi had found out that the Changechild had pierced ears – as odd and irrelevant as it sounded – they had practically begged her to take a box of shiny ornaments to hang on her upward-twisted ears and change them every candlemark. Her hair had also been cut to just above shoulder-length, since anything below that area had been knotted and dirtied beyond repair.

And the strangest thing was that no one seemed to notice Dawnshadow at all…she was simply another Tayledras, as far as anyone else was concerned. Perhaps it had been because of the way she had been able to observe the Tayledras with the quiet assessment of a falcon watching its prey, and then her ability to imitate them with such authenticity that no one seemed to actually notice her difference.

Or maybe Snowsong was taking her presence a bit to seriously and wondering why no one else did so. After all, Dawnshadow was a Changechild…

Oh, what's the difference? It's not her fault she looks like she does, anyway…don't be so prejudiced.

Kestri stirred, and Snowsong scratched the bondbird's crest while he watched Dawnshadow have another attempt at mounting the Companion. The Tayledras had at least bedecked Kyrrith with riding gear so Dawnshadow wouldn't have to ride bareback, but she might as well have been as she still couldn't tell the difference between a saddle and reins.

One thing's for sure…if any Shin'a'in saw her, they would laugh to death.

Finally, the Changechild launched herself into the saddle and promptly fell over to embrace Kyrrith's neck to prevent from falling. The Companion tossed his head, and Dawnshadow nodded to an unheard command and tried to find the reins to hold onto. When she found them, she held on to them weakly and was frowning incredulously, as if to say, "Is this all I'm allowed to hold onto?!"

Kyrrith began a tentative walk forward, and Dawnshadow tensed; when she didn't fall off, the Companion took another step…and another…and quickened his pace into something less than a trot but more than a walk. Finally he decided to risk it and broke into a canter; and Dawnshadow tipped sideways and fell on the ground.

Snowsong snickered as she got to her feet. It wasn't bad to have a little entertainment while healing.

:Rest,: Kestri ordered, looking up at the sound and fixing a guilt-inflicting stare on Snowsong. :Not get better if not rest.:

:I'm just watching the Changechild, Kestri,: Snowsong told her, indicating the window with a gentle jerk of his scratching to the right. Kestri lifted her head a bit as if to look out the window, then settled back down.

:Not get better, Snowsong,: she warned. :No more scout if not get better.:

Snowsong sighed. If anything, that was the reason he wasn't resting in the first place – as soon as he closed his eyes, he could feel that mad stare on him, that overwhelming darkness that smothered him so that he couldn't breathe…

In fact, Snowsong wasn't exactly sure if he wanted to go back to scouting after he was better. What if he got attacked again? He wasn't sure he'd be able to fight against the paranoia…it was as if that thing had poisoned him with its appearance, and ruined his life. For Snowsong wasn't a mage – all the magic he could do was Mindspeaking to Kestri, and he was still confused on whether that was really magic. His whole life was based on being a Tayledras scout…what would he do if he suddenly was not able to do that anymore? Just lie around the Vale like some humanoid cat?

The idea of a humanoid cat brought him back to the idea of the Changechild, and he couldn't help feeling jealous. She had a whole new life ahead of her, being both Chosen and a Changechild. She could learn how to use her magic, and all the while Snowsong would be lying here, brooding about his future.

He sighed, and Kestri opened an eye to stare at him disapprovingly.

:I know. Rest,: Snowsong said, and Kestri nodded mentally. Snowsong succumbed regretfully, though in his dreams surfaced a solution to his problems.

~

Kyrrith snickered as Dawnshadow fell to the ground again, giving a meow-like moan.

"Well, it is hard!" Dawnshadow protested, trying to sound wounded and pitiful. The Companion tossed his head, mane fluttering as he pranced to face the other way, giving the Changechild a view of his left side.

:No it isn't!: he said, laughing. :Gods, Dawnshadow…you're worse than some other first-timers I've seen!:

"Then do not blame the rider, blame the…" the Changechild trailed off, trying to think of a word. "…Rider-ee."

Kyrrith snorted with unmistakable intent and tossed his tail, fidgeting. :Nevermind. Just…try and ride me to a run. I'm a Companion – it shouldn't be this hard for you to ride me!:

"Well, it is," Dawnshadow muttered, putting two hands on the saddle and lifting herself up, placing a foot in the…the foot-thingy.

Kyrrith snorted again in distaste for Dawnshadow's intelligence in the names of the riding gear, but said nothing to correct her.

This time, at least, Dawnshadow was able to mount easily enough…though when she grasped the reins – those stupidly thin things that made a mockery of ropes – she felt her heart pound and her insides twist nervously. And then the Companion moved – the strangeness of sitting down and moving at the same time made her almost dizzy – and her fingers tightened around the reins until her knuckles her white.

:Easy now, kitty,: Kyrrith said soothingly, moving into the quicker walk. :You can do it. Hold on, keep your balance…:

He said it as if this was obvious; Dawnshadow found no comfort in his words. Rather, she felt challenged – she didn't need to be treated and called a kitten. She was better than that; she'd show that big stupid talking horse, she'd stay on this time…

Kyrrith snorted again, telling Dawnshadow that he had been listening to her thoughts, and quickened. Dawnshadow felt herself slip sideways, and corrected her stance before falling off completely. Kyrrith's head bobbed approvingly, and then bent slightly forward into a quicker pace; Dawnshadow gave another meow-like yelp of surprise and fell forward, her chin on the Companion's neck. She straightened her back and felt herself waver; one foot had somehow slipped out of the…the foot-thingy-

And then she suddenly felt herself become steadied on the saddle as easily as if someone had just propped her up; meanwhile, Kyrrith turned in the clearing and Dawnshadow felt herself turn with him, finally 'in tune' with the movements.

:Well, if you can't ride, that's one way to stay on the saddle,: Kyrrith said dryly, coming to an abrupt halt that Dawnshadow thankfully did not topple out of.

"What is that supposed to mean, dearest Companion?" Dawnshadow asked, sliding off Kyrrith and landing on the ground cleanly.

Kyrrith snorted – more equine laughter. :I mean, you still can't ride, dearest Cat-thing,: he replied smoothly, turning and whuffing her black hair. Dawnshadow giggled and pushed him gently away.

"Oh, then how did I manage to keep on you?" Dawnshadow asked lightly, patting the Companion's head and slinging an arm around his neck while he walked towards his 'stables' to get food.

:Fetching,: Kyrrith replied. :Fetching. You have a Fetching-gift, weak enough to be almost useless.:

"Thank you…though I'm not sure if that is a complement or an insult, thank you," Dawnshadow replied jokingly. "And…what is 'fetching'? I am not a dog, am I?"

:Fetching is a gift,: Kyrrith explained. :You, well…'call' things to you. It's no bad thing that your gift is very weak, but you can at least use it to…fetch yourself to me.:

"Oh…I see," Dawnshadow said understandingly. "So what I'm doing is I'm calling myself to you, or calling you to me."

:Exactly.:

"Companion, what other gifts do I have?" the Changechild asked curiously. This time Kyrrith gave a mental shrug, along with arching his neck.

:You'll find out in when we get to Haven.:

"Haven…?"

:Where the Collegium is,: Kyrrith explained curtly, clearly closing off any further conversation on the matter. Dawnshadow complied, though reluctantly.

It seemed to her that Kyrrith wanted to keep something away from her…still acting as if she were the kitten, that it was something to mature for her to know.

It bothered her…

But, at least, she thought to herself, brightening a bit, we'll be going to the Collegium tomorrow. I'll find out soon.

~

The next day, Dawnshadow was still fretting about that 'secret information' that everyone seemed to be keeping from her. When she had given Kelvren a farewell hug, the gryphon seemed to be extremely uncomfortable, even though Dawnshadow knew that it had not bothered him one bit when she had first met him. And saying a less friendly farewell to Darian and Nightwind and Keisha was odd, as well; they all concealed less-than-happy thoughts and feelings that the Changechild detected thanks to her – what was it called? Oh, yes – Empathy.

She had not been given anymore Tayledras-style clothing, which made her both crestfallen and guilty – the garments wore loosely and comfortably around her body, and she loved them. But she also knew it was wrong of her to think herself worthy of more…after all, she didn't live here, she didn't deserve such Tayledras luxury. And she had only been with them for a few days – she couldn't even remember the exact time.

And now it was time to leave…

:To the Collegium, dearest,: Kyrrith said, nuzzling her cheek. :You'll meet others.:

:Yes,: Dawnshadow agreed faintly, turning and mounting him. She waved at the Tayledras and they waved back – drearily, she noted. Did they want her to leave? Had they not enjoyed her stay? She should have been more helpful, instead of just eating their strawberries and lying around and horseback-Fetching. She should have-

:Enough!: Kyrrith said finally. :You didn't do anything wrong, stop worrying!:

:But-:

:No. You were a wonderful visitor, I'm sure,: Kyrrith said with that same finality. And then the topic was closed for discussion, the Companion coming out as the one of top, like always.

Kyrrith ran off from the Pelagir Hills, south, and Dawnshadow kept her gaze on the Tayledras territories for as long as they stayed in sight. Then, when they were gone, she turned forward…towards the 'Collegium,' 'Haven,' and hopefully to figure out what her gifts were and what was being kept from her.

~

He had to hurry…hurry, hurry, hurry, or else he'd be too late!

:What?!: Kestri cried indignantly, flapping onto a drawer and scrambling for a place to hold onto while Snowsong opened it and withdrew several pieces of clothing before slamming it shut. :No! What Snowsong doing?:

Snowsong ignored her, knowing that if he told Kestri than she would disagree and make this all the more harder for him…harder than it already was.

:Tell!: Kestri demanded, flopping clumsily on the bed while Snowsong stuffed the clothing into a sack and stumbled for the 'stash' of food he kept under the bed. It had been recently added – just last week, in fact, just before he found the Changechild. He had felt…compelled.

And now he was glad for that compulsion, for he needed it. There was no time to bother a hertasi – not that they would have allowed him access to food, since they all probably knew his injury.

After Snowsong shoved the food awkwardly into the bag, Kestri realized what he was doing – and immediately disapproved. And showed it, shrieking loudly and flapping her wings.

:NO! NO! NO!:

:Kestri, please understand,: Snowsong said finally, grasping the kestrel's wings in a birdlike equivalent of grasping a human's shoulders. :I know you don't have enough vocabulary for this, but you have to understand – I can't stay here anymore. I'm wounded…probably for life. Both physically and mentally, as stupid as that may sound. I'm…I'm afraid to go back into the forest, Kestri. I don't want to, not ever again, and I'm not useful for anything else. Someone told me in a dream, Kestri…they told me to go with Dawnshadow, they told me that she needed my help, and that makes a whole lot more sense than just staying here where I'm absolutely useless, Kestri. Do you understand?:

Kestri looked away almost guiltily, but then turned those deep dark eyes back on Snowsong. And then the strangest thing – they seemed to glow with understanding that was equal to a human's own, glimmered with respect, shone approvingly.

And then the gleam was gone, replaced by the emotionless obsidian optics.

:I…understand,: Kestri said haltingly, painfully. Her tone surprised her bondmate, who never knew that his bondbird – or any bondbird, in fact – could be so…emotional.

She struggled in Snowsong's grip, and he let her go onto the bed. She fluffed her earthly feathers. :Kestri go with Snowsong, protect Snowsong.:

So she had at least understood the tone of his voice, if not his words.

:Thank you, Kestri,: Snowsong said, slinging the sack around his shoulder and wincing as its weight fell on his back.

And then the kestrel revealed another spurt of intelligence that no raptor should have ever mustered; she turned to him, focused those dark eyes on his again, defiantly. :No thanks Kestri. Thank dream…thank Her.:

And with that, she flapped up and out the window of Snowsong's ekele, leaving the ex-scout in momentary astonishment before he realized how much time he was wasting and rushed out.

~

It was near sunset; Kyrrith directed Dawnshadow on how to start a fire and make camp. The Changechild only fumbled on making the fire, wondering how something that Kyrrith claimed was so easy could be so hard, and then argued with the Companion about a shelter.

"I can sleep on a blanket," Dawnshadow protested, arranging the wool blanket and curling up on it as proof. "I do not need to go to the trouble of making a shelter that I will just need to take down in the morning."

:Dawnshadow…:

"I will be fine, Kyrrith," Dawnshadow insisted, reaching up and tugging gently on his mane to bring him down beside her. He complied reluctantly, arranging his ivory frame around her. "See? I will be safe."

:Yes,: Kyrrith said noncommittally, nuzzling Dawnshadow's cheek once more. She yawned and settled against his side, warming to him and using him as a pillow.

"I will be fine…" Dawnshadow said again, closing her eyes and nudging further into Kyrrith's short fur, then lifting a hand and rubbing her knuckles into the Companion's side. His head and neck drooped, then dropped onto the blanket.

"See?" Dawnshadow said proudly. "I could not make a shelter that would keep us both inside."

:That's different. I can sleep outside, but you…: Kyrrith trailed off uncomfortably, and Dawnshadow frowned, knowing exactly what he was about to say.

:I am not a human,: Dawnshadow said earnestly. :Nor an animal. But that just makes me…versatile. You realize how uncomfortable it would be if I were a human, unable to go anywhere that was in the wild, without anyone to tend to my needs? I can hunt and…and fight, I do not need a bow and arrow or sword.:

:Humans do not need anyone to tend to them always,: Kyrrith argued. Dawnshadow was secretly pleased – she had gotten him on her level of talking…as an animal to an animal, rather than a human to animal. If she kept this up, it would be easier to converse with him.

:Oh, yes?: Dawnshadow replied, unfazed. :What about the Tayledras? Hertasi running about everywhere! You would think that they did not know how to do anything by themselves!:

Kyrrith chuckled. :The Tayledras would live fine without the hertasi. It is the hertasi who need the help of the Tayledras, not the other way around.:

:Oh, but still. You must agree – you see my point, yes?:

A hesitant pause…then, :Yes. I do.:

:Good! Then we are on the first steps to friendship,: Dawnshadow laughed, hugging Kyrrith.

:Or tolerance,: he replied dryly. :Or-:

A rustling in the nearby bushes, and a passing shadow overhead interrupted him. Both Chosen and Companion looked up to the shadow's owner, and saw a small bird land awkwardly on the ground and gaze at them, sunset hues reflecting in its dark eyes. The rustling ceased, and a person crawled out of the foliage – not tall or large enough to be threatening, not small enough to be ignored.

"Who are – Snowsong!" Dawnshadow exclaimed, standing as she recognized the figure. The Tayledras scout, panting and wobbling on his feet, nearly collapsed as soon as he saw them. Dawnshadow helped him up, and Kestri flapped onto Kyrrith's head for a better vantagepoint.

"What are you doing here?"

"I-I'm so g-glad th-at y-you did-n't make it f-farther th-than th-is," Snowsong panted, leaning against Dawnshadow's support and allowing her to carry him towards the small flame encircled by rocks. Dawnshadow quickly threw more fuel at it – leaves and twigs – and it grew considerably larger. She eased Snowsong to the ground, where he sat panting for a few more minutes, seeming to be in pain.

"Are-?"

"Yes," Snowsong said quickly. "I'm just…sorry, do you have a-"

"Here," Dawnshadow interrupted, withdrawing a container of water and nearly shoving it into Snowsong's mouth. He took it gratefully and nearly inhaled it; after, Dawnshadow placed the half-empty container back into the bag while Snowsong leaned his head back and recovered.

:So. He came afterall.:

"You mean you knew this was happening?" Dawnshadow demanded, turning to the resting Companion.

:Yes, I did.:

"But you do not even know him!"

:How do you know that?:

Dawnshadow had no answer, but Kestri saved her what little humiliation she would have endured.

:Snowsong, Kestri, come. Help Dawnshadow,: Kestri explained bluntly. :Dawnshadow need help, Snowsong give. Kestri protect.:

"Snowsong can't do much anything else," Snowsong said, his voice recovered. "And besides…I was told to come."

"But who?" Dawnshadow asked. Snowsong shrugged, and Kyrrith answered for him.

:If he was told to come with us and help, then don't turn him away,: the Companion advised. :Help is always appreciated, however sudden.:

"I suppose," Dawnshadow agreed. She turned back to Snowsong. "Are you hungry?"

"No…no…I'm just…tired," Snowsong yawned. Dawnshadow nodded and escorted him to the other side of Kyrrith, where he collapsed and fell asleep immediately. Kestri flapped down to him, and in no time Chosen and Companion were left in silence.

"Well."

:Well, indeed. Now get some sleep yourself…we're leaving first thing tomorrow morning.: