Part three

***

Peace! Stretching in his corner behind the dumpster he felt afraid for just a moment. Then he remembered the voice, the voice that had helped him overcome his loneliness, his pain. He couldn't hear it now. His mind had stopped singing to him like it had done before. But he remembered it. And there were images, more images and voices, not soothing ones like hers had been, disturbing ones, evil ones, cruel ones. They had left him for a while, had hidden deep inside him, but now that he was at peace, they were coming back. He welcomed them, good and bad. He had made peace with himself.

***

Behind the white hospital curtain, Logan opened his eyes and crumpled the sheets in his fists. For a moment it had seemed real, Max so close to him, so vibrant he could feel her without touching. And then she had bolted, but he couldn't blame her for it. He needed a cure for the virus and needed it soon or they would both go mad with desire. Or Max might decide she had enough and leave him with the pain he had felt in the three months she had been dead for all he had known. He had thought that all of his sorrow would have been consumed during that time along with all the pain and the suicidal thoughts. He had thought that there could be nothing worse.

Remembering his reaction to Max' appearance in his penthouse and the look of longing on her face an unexplainable joy drove away all his self-pity. He smiled to himself. Yes, she was alive, that was all that counted. All the rest could be dealt with, as long as she was alive. There had to be a possibility for them to be together. There just had to be. Determination clenched Logan's jaw as he shook off the drowsiness and the aches in his body and set about to call Bling. Then, he should get up and talk to Dr. Carr before heading home to his huge rich, empty apartment. He couldn't count on Max being there, not after this -for her circumstances- open display of emotion.

***

Natalie had calmly described her plight to Sam. Only her hands in her lap might have betrayed the anxiety plaguing her. But Sam was too surprised to notice. He believed her. Not that she had doubted him for a moment. After all, they had known each other for a long time, and he knew what the guys from Gentech were capable of. But she hadn't even thought about his reaction to her bringing up the Eyes Only issue, the fact that she needed help beyond what Sam could probably offer her.

So, she was relieved when he didn't try to deny anything and just said, "I'll talk to this informant I know, and he'll bring the story to Eyes Only. He might be able to help, but that is his decision, and it might take a while, he's been waging quite a little war on the gene manipulation lately. You haven't heard his broadcast today, have you?"

"Why, yes, Sam, that's what I've heard all day long," she quipped sarcastically.

"Well, I'll explain it to you in a minute, but first I need to check on a patient, I'll be right back."

With that Natalie was left alone as Sam rushed out the door.

***

Logan was quite anxious to get out of his hospital room. He was fully dressed and looked haunted. He never gave Sam a chance to talk or to assess his condition, the words just poured out as soon as Sam appeared in the doorframe. "Sam, I need your help. Find me a geneticist to help me with a cure for this virus. There has to be something that can be done. All those I know can't really be trusted." While he hadn't told Sam more than the doctor needed to know, Logan still felt he could put his life in the hands of this Hippocratic servant. It was just not Sam's fault that Logan had so much trouble opening up. "How come it had been that easy with Max?" he suddenly asked himself. How come he was asking himself such a question when he knew how he felt for her. He hadn't said it out loud until now, but yes, he loved her. Too bad he had admitted it only now when it might be too late.

Logan's features were speaking of his determination and his eyes had just enough desperation in them to make Sam fear for his friend's power of reason. Logan was just about to go on when Sam stopped him.

"Well, before you continue, you might as well hear this. Next door is a friend of mine from the Henderson clinic. She got into some trouble with Gentech. She is hoping, well," he corrected, "we are hoping that Eyes Only could help her at least with the relocation."

For a moment, Logan was disoriented by the sudden change of focus. He blinked, and then closed his eyes for a few seconds. After Max had broadcasted the Manticore story today, he had thought about everything but Eyes Only. Between seeing Max again and almost dying, his attention span had focused on his own plight with the virus. He hadn't even tried to find out about the impact the Manticore story had had. But then, he managed to concentrate, and his eyes regained the hard, unyielding composure he hid himself behind. His red-blue and white Halloween mask was plastered over his face once again. His heart had been broken today, but Eyes Only could not wallow in misery, at least not today it seemed.

"Gentech, hmm? Ok, I'll see what I can do, but we need to find her a place to stay, this might take a while, considering the whole Manticore chaos. Do you have anything safe?"

"Not really, just my place, but it's not the safest."

"Then take her with you tonight, and I'll set up a meeting for tomorrow."

"You really think you could get out of here without a complete check up after the scare you gave me today?" Sam grinned and pushed him lightly towards the bed.

"Actually, yes", Logan cocked his head in mock concern.

"I see I have no chance, but let me see how you're holding up first."

While poking Logan thoroughly, Sam added: "I'll look for a geneticist to fit the bill, but you might want to approach Natalie, my friend, first. I can't guarantee that she will accept looking into the virus thing, but at least she is in the field. She could be better connected than I am. Maybe you could talk her into helping you."

Logan was surprised. Today must be one of those days where you can lose or gain everything. While the words "trouble with Gentech" and "need help" had registered, he hadn't realized that Sam's friend was a geneticist. He hadn't thought any further than finding a scientist yet. Might as well see if he did as well without a plan as Max did, he grinned to himself.

"Is she really trustworthy?"

"I've known her for a long time. For a while, we lost contact, but she's been around for the last what, 10 years. She's been through a lot but won't say a word about it, so tread carefully, but yes, I'd trust her with my darkest secrets."

That was good. But for now, Logan was just relieved to be out of the hospital and go crash at his place to think things over.

***

Memories, the crux of his long life. He might have been better off with his head empty, his own feral needs singing to him. Now he remembered and sadness overwhelmed him. But he could not grieve. No, it was too late for that, they were all gone, all his friends, human or otherwise. Memories were all he had left, mostly bad, but also good ones, beautiful ones. His heart was so dulled it could not ache anymore. After all those years of trying to feel more than just his hunger he had finally lost his feeling, any feeling. He was left cold, stone cold, just like the walls of the city around him. Cold, forsaken, forgotten. But not empty. Not alone. He still had his memories, could still feel through them, and remember what it was like to feel bad, but also good things.

***

Sitting in front of his computer, Logan was puzzled. His fingers attacked the keyboard with fierceness. He had a little search routine running on Natalie Brandis. He trusted Sam, but he would never repeat the mistake he had mad in the Blonck case, endangering Max because he hadn't researched a story thoroughly enough. The results of his search were quite peculiar and elicited a frown from him. He had been interested in the college studies of the future Dr. Brandis. Bleep. No records. Yes, there was a paper trail that at some point got lost in the Pulse only to reappear years later. But Logan had been hacking computers for too long not to recognize a false trail when he saw one. He had made a few calls to alleged acquaintances of Natalie Brandis before 2005. Nothing. She had married just before the pulse but before that - nada. Those who were supposed to know her did not. He started again, determined to get to the bottom of this. Sam had mentioned secrets. Well, he could not let those secrets get in the way. The keyboard started clicking as if there had been an ant stampede over it. Logan expanded his search to Canada, and there he struck gold or rather pay dirt as he accessed first the Toronto P. D., and then the coroner's office's respective databases. Police records, American as well as Canadian that established that Natalie Brandis was the same person as Natalie Lambert. He had no problem with that, after all many had changed their names. The only problem with that was that Dr. Lambert, Toronto coroner, had died under mysterious circumstances years ago.

It hadn't been easy to establish the connection from Brandis to Lambert, especially since many of the usual documents seemed to have been lost in the Pulse, but there had been some scientific articles published along with her picture. The picture was the same in both cases. Logan cocked his head unknowingly as he compared the two pictures he had brought up on his screen. Natalie Lambert seemed a happy person, had a bright spark in her eyes, while Natalie Brandis, just a few years later... hmm... the difference could not be overseen. Well, he had secrets too, who hadn't these days. At least, he had a starting point. Now all he hoped was that she would be honest. That was all that counted for him. That and a happy resolution to his situation with Max.

***

Talking over a cup of coffee and a glass of wine had never hurt anyone. She had told Logan the whole story, well; almost all of it as far as it concerned him, regarding her involvement with Gentech. He had promised the help of Eyes Only and professed to need more information. While the young man in the wheelchair - the handsome blond from the hospital Max had protected so fiercely, she suddenly realized- was very well mannered and even nice to speak to, he was holding back something and had just started to ask pointed questions that came way too close to the truth for Natalie's liking. She was beginning to squirm in her chair, trying to decide what to do under these circumstances when the conversation suddenly changed direction and he came back to her predicament with Gentech.

"Dr. Brandis, have you ever heard of project Manticore?" His piercing blue eyes seemed to nail her to the wall. Yes, she had. Moreover, Sam had brought her up to date with the newest developments regarding the broadcasts of Eyes Only in that direction. A lot of the data she had gathered in the past two months had led her to believe that Gentech and Manticore were related, in fact so much related that they had recently started to swap information and projects and to work together to face the South African concurrence. Manticore was using Gentech as a beautiful cover story. Unfortunately, she had no proof of that fact. That was the problem Eyes Only needed to tackle.

Natalie would relocate -the use of that word had startled her - and begin anew. Logan had everything covered. Eyes Only would have to get the files Natalie had partial access to and hope they would find some more that could be hacked into. If all went well, Eyes Only would be able to expose the link between Gentech and Manticore and deal another blow to the newly reorganized monster project.