A/N: Thank you, thank you, thank you a zillion times to all of you awesome reviewers! I didn't even begin to expect I'd get so many reviews (and FOUR from Airelle Vilka, my fanfiction idol, no less *dies from the blissful happiness of it all*) and you are all the ABSOLUTE best :) :) :) I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, and I apologize in advance for the sorta/kinda L/J mush. :S I just couldn't help it! All righty, I swear I'll shut up now :) Read on!



Chapter Six: Physical

Before that evening, James had never heard of drills. However, by the time they finished eating dinner, he was positive that he could live a long and happy existence without ever having to hear about them again.

After the incident earlier that day, the Evanses had insisted that Vernon Dursley come over for dinner to apologize for the accident Petunia had caused. Vernon had agreed.

Unfortunately.

As he rambled on about drills, a simply mesmerized Petunia watching him intently, James stifled a yawn. Lily was pushing her mashed potatoes around her plate with her fork, looking extremely bored. Both of her parents wore fixed smiles as they listened to Petunia's new object of affection.

"Er...Mum," Lily started, standing up from the table and snatching James's plate out from in front of him, even though he still had half of his meal left. "I think I'm going to wash the dishes. James can help."

"Oh, no, dear, I was planning on it," Mrs. Evans said desperately. "I wouldn't dream of tearing you away from this fascinating conversation."

"No, really, Mum," Lily said, snatching up a few more plates and stacking them on top of James's. "I couldn't bear to take you away from this. It would be just cruel of me."

"No, darling, really-"

"Come on James," Lily cut in, balancing all the plates on one hand and dragging James into the kitchen with the other.

"I officially loathe the person who invented drills," James announced as Lily began to fill up the sink.

"Honestly," Lily agreed, "Couldn't he find something just a BIT more interesting to talk about? Like, I don't know, toothpicks?" She sighed. "Knowing my luck, Petunia will marry the prat."

"No way is that guy going to be my brother-in-law."

As soon as the words escaped James's mouth, he felt his cheeks flush, and Lily stared intently down at the dishes.

Why the bloody HELL did you do that, imbecile? he asked himself furiously. Now things are going to be all awkward!

They'd never even DISCUSSED getting married, after all! James had just assumed...well...Lily had been his only serious girlfriend all through Hogwarts, so what else were they supposed to do?

"Well," Lily finally said after what seemed like a lifetime of silence, "James, you have to RINSE the dishes and stack them in the dish drainer."

James stared down at the full sink of soapy dishes waiting to be rinsed.

"Sorry," he apologized sheepishly, turning on the sink and running the dishes under the steamy water.

"It's okay," she replied softly.

The awkward silence resumed, and James felt almost afraid to breathe. Minus the muffled one-sided conversation between Vernon and the Evanses coming from the dining room, it was quiet.

He and Lily were never awkward around one another. It just didn't happen to them.

Or it hadn't.

But now he'd had to go be an idiot and mention MARRIAGE, of all bloody things!

Obviously, the quiet was bothering Lily as well, because she left the sink and switched on the radio. Humming along softly, she continued to wash the dishes, and James rinsed them numbly.

Why, oh WHY did he have to be such an idiot?

"I'm sorry," he finally muttered. He had done this, and now he had to fix it.

"It's all right," Lily replied quietly. "It's just that...it's strange to talk about marriage so young."

"I'm sorry," James repeated. "It was a dumb thing to say...I mean, it's not like you'd want to marry me-"

"Oh, puh-leeze," Lily cut him off, bumping his hip lightly with her own. "You know we're going to get old and senile together."

"Aw, how romantic," James replied teasingly, pecking her on the cheek.

"James, you tiger," Lily said sarcastically, kissing him lightly on the lips.

At that moment, the door burst open and Mr. Evans stepped into the kitchen. It wasn't hard to mentally picture lightning flashing around him in true 'bad-guy-entrance' fashion.

"WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?" he boomed.

I am Thor, God of Thunder, James thought dryly.

Lily backed away from James at once.

"Just washing the dishes, Daddy," she said innocently.

"I'll take care of that," Mr. Evans said quickly. "Why don't you two go out in the living room with Mr. Dursley and Petunia?"

"Daddy-"

"NOW," Mr. Evans ordered.

Lily dragged James out of the kitchen, muttering, "Honestly, it's too much to ask to be alone for more than two seconds."

As soon as they stepped into the living room, it was clear that Mr. Evans was obviously more worried about his younger daughter being alone with a boy. Petunia and Vernon were seated on the sofa, and James felt embarrassed just watching how shamelessly Lily's sister flirted. An Olivia Newton John song was playing on the radio...'Physical'.

Forward much? James thought dryly.

"So," Petunia began in a breezy tone quite unlike her own, "Are you busy this Friday night? Maybe we could see a movie."

Vernon cleared his throat, looking particularly uncomfortable.

"Uh...well...I..."

Petunia scooted even closer to Vernon, which James hadn't thought possible until that moment.

"We could-"

However, Petunia didn't get a chance to finish her sentence, seeing as she was cut off by Sirius, Remus, and Peter climbing out of the fireplace.

Sirius grinned at Petunia and Vernon and wriggled his eyebrows mischievously.

Then, to the utmost horror of everyone in the room (perhaps the house...heck, maybe even the neighborhood!) he began to sing along with the radio.

"Let's get physical!" he warbled, his voice many octaves higher than usual and painfully off-key, "Physical! I wanna get physical! Let's get physical! Lemme hear your body talk, your body talk, lemme hear your body talk!"

Petunia, James, and Lily were all staring at Sirius in utmost revulsion, and Vernon looked as though he was about to faint.

"What...what the...?" Vernon muttered wildly, staring wide-eyed at James's fellow Marauders. "Where...how...?"

"Ahhh, Petunia," Sirius said slyly, "I didn't know you liked the not-capable-of-coherent-speech type! To think ol' Peter here coulda scored!"

"Shut up," Peter squeaked.

"You people..." Vernon said in shock. "I...you climbed out of the fireplace!"

"Ding ding ding! And he forms a sentence, everyone!" Sirius exclaimed in a deep announcer's tone. "Let's give our friend a round of applause here!"

Remus and Peter burst into enthusiastic applause, and Vernon looked as though his eyes were about to pop out of his head.

"You people are crazy!" he proclaimed, then sped out of the living room.

Petunia, who had been glaring daggers at Sirius, called desperately, "So...see you Friday???"





A/N 2: The song Physical belongs to Olivia Newton John, which I stated in the fic, and she can keep it. :) Though I'm sure Sirius wouldn't mind borrowing it a bit more...