Title: As The Moon Shines
Author: Mikayla
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: You know who owns what…you should, anyway.
Summary: Sirius sleeps as Remus broods.
Author's Notes: This will be my first slash fic ever. This is also a gift to my great friend, Alex. It is my first attempt at a slash fic and feedback would be much appreciated. OK, so it's not really all that slashy but it's the closest I can do right now. Enjoy.
As The Moon ShinesIt's funny how a beautiful thing like the moon can cause me so much pain. I admire it from afar, knowing that every once a month; it'll put me through immense pain. Don't know what to call the moon exactly. I find myself thinking of it as a silent nighttime companion yet it was also my enemy, something that forces me to change.
Tonight, the moon is almost fully formed. Tomorrow I will have to be locked up, just in case. I can already feel the beginnings of the gradual transformation. The exposure to the full moon may cause a werewolf to transform quickly, but a werewolf always knows when that change is coming closer. A dull ache sits inside me somewhere as the moon fills out each night. The closer it gets to being full, the more the ache grows until the night of the full moon when I take the painful transition into darkness.
I've lived with this seemingly forever, yet I still wish it'd go away. I've come to accept that there may never be a cure but inside, my hope still glitters through. One day, perhaps, I'd be able to live as a human through a full moon. Until then…
Sirius rolls over in bed. His arm stretched across the bed. From my place at the window, I can see the moonlight spotlighting him. It's almost…breathtaking to see Sirius' face without the constant worry and fear. The things he must have experienced in Azkaban losing it's grip of him and letting him relax. I wonder how long it's been since he had a full night of restful sleep.
I sigh and turn back to stare at the vast depths of the inky sky. Sometimes I think back and wonder why things have happened the way it did. I've never been a religious man but if there was a God, why does he make us suffer? Why is it that good people have to run and hide, yet others, who are undeserving of it, roam free?
What I can't understand is why Peter could have done what he did. Before all this happened almost fifteen years ago, I thought I knew them all, the Marauders, inside and out. But I guess time proved me wrong. Peter had always been a bit cowardly but I still can't see the reason why he would have turned against us. Granted, he had never been much of a fighter but I never figured he would become corrupted with power. Or with the want of power.
And Sirius…well, I always thought he trusted me wholeheartedly. I may be a Dark Creature but he knew I was no Dark Wizard. Yet…he still suspected me. Still thought I couldn't be trusted. I mean, he had said he loved me. But where is love without trust? I know, though, in the end, I'm going to forgive him. I always do. And in these circumstances, it's not exactly something plausible to use to hole a grudge.
Across the room, Sirius murmurs in his sleep. It was hard living those years, thinking he had betrayed his best friend but my heart hadn't let me believe it. That proves that in some logical cases, the heart can be right. The heart doesn't listen to fact or fiction, it just knows what one wants and needs. In my case, Sirius.
So what happens now? We haven't spoken to each other about out relationship. In all retrospect, he may not feel the same way he used to. Do I dare take the risk in asking? I couldn't possibly, in fear of rejection. He had always been the confident one, so wouldn't it be…right for him to take the first step, make the first move?
I shake my head, dispersing my depressing thoughts. I get up and start to leave the room when he breaks the silence of the night.
"Remus, please stay."
And I do, like I used to.
Author's Note: I hope you liked that. Please review and tell me what you think! I'm planning a companion piece to this, in Sirius' point of view.