When I was just an owlet!

by Twinkling Tabby

Minerva McGonagall and Albus Dumbledore before they become the professors we know... Ever wondered how they met? Please if you read, review!!!! Yes, now it has a funny title... If you find it strange and want any explanation, though... REVIEW AND ASK !!!

7. 6 : Back to

6. Back to "normal"

After that quite difficult beginning of the week, though, things seemed to improve rather encouragingly. For once, Albus and Minerva took the cheerful habit to go to a walk together every afternoon after their lessons, which Minerva also considered as part of her secret resolutions to live a bit instead of always working... Of course it cost them some jokes from Charles, but he would have to stop when it would bore him... What Minerva didn't know, though, was the attempts from Charles to pry seriously in his friend's feelings...

Albus would never forget the mad laughter that had took him when he had realised what Charles intended to imply... Well to imply, with his well-known lack of tact, had been quite direct!
"Albus, you're not... you're not in love, are you?
-With whom would I be in love?
-Oh, don't know... Just... well... a question, just... to know...
-So... No, I'm not in love."
Yet the question was curious.
"Well, and how do you find this Minerva?"
He had raised his head for the 2nd time from the book he had been reading...
"Charles! She's my friend, what are you up, to ask such questions?
-Nothing I told you... you just... well, you like her very much... err... you love her, don't you?
-Yea, you could say that... You could say I'm quite fond of her... or you could just say, simply, shortly, that we are friends. As I told you about three minutes ago!
-Oh... Just friends?"
Then he had realised what Charles was meaning... And in fact he really wondered how he hadn't seen it since 10 minutes, because it was so obvious... Well he supposed he had been distracted because he had been desperately trying to read!… Oh and all right, his difficulties to concentrate on anything since he had known of Pr Diggory's boy were certainly also responsible for that…
What a surprising idea, though! When he understood, it took him a while to finally get rid of his laugh and summon enough seriousness to speak again. It was indeed his first laughter since Monday afternoon, and although it was just on Tuesday evening in the dormitory, just before their sleeping night, Albus rarely spent one whole day without a laugh or a happy smile, so he had had a lot of nervousness to expulse in it, which didn't help to stop.
"Yes, he had said loudly, yes, just friends, what did you expect? She's a 1st Year, remember? A child, a... whatever, you're being stupid!
-Not the 1st time I'm stupid Albus, but still... I just wanted to be reassured
-So now you are"
Well, he hadn't meant to be dry, but the prospect of Minerva being his girlfriend was so ridiculous, and then... well, it was ridiculous, he told himself, and became even more irritably because he felt as if he could have thought a semi-second that possibly, later, perhaps... Well, that was stupid. Charles' effect, obviously.
And so he had returned to his book.

What Albus didn't know was that Milane had had approximately the same idea, though a bit later, on Wednesday evening, after their second little excursion, near the lake...
They had been in the dormitory, intending to relax and to forget the awkwardness that accompanied everyone everywhere, and Milane had taken her more secret-girl-looking face, which was saying something, to ask Minerva with a giggle...
"So it's becoming an habit to go and walk on the grounds... isn't it?
-Yes, I fear you'll soon have to be used to it...
-With Albus... isn't it?"
Then Minerva had glanced searchingly, catching on much quicker with Milane than Albus with Charles.
"Yes, she had said. With Albus.
-How romantically it must be...
-It would certainly be if it was with a boyfriend, I suppose...
-Oh Mina, stop it, I know you just adore him!
-Yea... And he's seven years older than me" she had said calmly.
"But he's...
-He's a 7th Year, and Head Boy, and...-
-and handsome, and intelligent, and gentle...
-Yes, Minerva tried to admit rationally, he is, so...
-So?
-So he'll never be my boyfriend!
-Oh don't tell me you wouldn't want!
-That's not possible, Milane, forget it...
-But still, wouldn't you like it, if...
-Stop it Milane!" Oh for the heaven's sake, she HAD sounded defensive... As if... As if... Nonsense! Albus was Albus and if Milane wanted to believe such foolish stuff...
"Milane, don't look at me like that!
-What?
-I'm not a stupid romantic heroin, he's actually just my friend!
-Yes, he is, she had nodded grinning,
-And I AM content with it.
-Yes, you are"
Then Joyce had come in, and Milane had left to the bathroom, though Minerva suspected it was just to laugh without her to become a fury.
She tutted. That was absurd.

But in fact both Charles' and Milane's jokes were really welcome those days, like everything else that would appease the ambience within the Common Rooms, the Great Hall, the lessons... within Hogwarts, in fact. Nobody among the students had ever seen Pr Diggory's boy, or even heard of him, but his death seemed to put a very awkward feeling in each of them, just as the one Minerva felt. Nobody could actually stay indifferent, not even those students who tried to pretend so, not to feel concerned… Especially when they had learnt it was Grindewald's work... Pr Diggory's family lived in Germany, they learnt; well, they had lived there until then, because Pr Diggory had decided they would move away to England, since Germany was apparently no longer a safe country.
By the way, Joyce, who didn't know about floo powder, didn't understand how he could have accepted a job so far from his family... It took about half-an-hour to tell her all the numerous manners a wizard had to travel to whichever point of earth in no time, from apparating to floo network, passing by portkeys.
They learnt most of what they came to know by the Daily Prophet. Although the paper usually didn't take interest in foreigner news, this time the murder of five wizards children amongst which was Pr Diggory's boy had caused such a wave of indignation that it was all over the news for the whole week... Family's interviews, children's biographies... Loads of description of the event itself, how it was supposed to have happened... It became a habit in Gryffindor tower to throw the papers in the fire after reading them, so that none would stay on the floor, offering their depressing first pages to innocent Gryffindors passing and trying to keep themselves happy.

That was partly why Albus and Minerva had gone out the first times, in fact, to escape this insufferable oppressing atmosphere of the castle... And then it did so much good to be able to sit next to Albus each evening and to discuss whatever they had to discuss... On Thursday, the awkwardness in the castle had begun to calm down, although some grim faces could still be seen, especially wandering in corridors, and occasionally glaring at those who were still able, or able again to laugh normally and spontaneously. Yet, Albus and Minerva went out, next to the lake, like the previous day, and sat under a tree, in front of a lazily moving tentacle of the giant squid...

They hadn't spoken since they had left the castle.

Then Minerva moved nearer to Albus and leant against him.
He didn't move, only raised an arm and patted her on the shoulder.

After a while he spoke.
"Charles would be half-paralysed with laugh if he saw us now"
She smiled.
"Yea. So would Milane, by the way.
-Milane?
-She's be teasing me no end about you, thinking... well... just like Charles in fact...
-So we've got to hope they'll not marry us without our consent..."
They had to laugh at that.

"Anyway, she said, I don't really mind their jokes...
-I don't either, I think they even know it's not true.
-No, it's not that. Well, ok, there's that, but also... just... they make me laugh and I need it a lot those days..."
He stared at her with concern.
"Must be a really difficult time, for you...
-As for everybody.
-More... first what you read on Saturday, and then that..."
She glanced at him shortly: "You can speak of my mother directly Albus, that's ok.
-Oh... All right then..."
They became silent.

Then Albus saw an owl that looked much like Griphook, and it reminded him:
"Did you become your dad's answer, by the way, about... about your mother?
-No... You've got to count two days for the trip, though, and then two days the other way, and I suppose dad has to take a bit time between, before he can answer, as it certainly comes as a little bit of shock, so...
-Is it that far, where you live?
-Well, no, not really... I think in fact it mustn't be further than 400 miles, perhaps... I'm not sure, well, depends on where exactly we are... But Griphook is just still an owlet, so he keeps losing his way. We bought him just last summer because I had to come to Hogwarts, so now he can carry my letters. The man in the shop told us he would become a very good post owl after some months, though...
-Oh... Good..."
Then they were interrupted by a loud screech. That was Griphook, very proud of himself because he had finally found his addressee, after having searched the Common Room, the Library and, for some strange owlish reason, the owlery.

"No, I've got nothing for you here, Griphook, sorry", she said, trying to deliver the letter –no pun intended- imprisoned by a large amount of unnecessary knots.
"Stay still, please"
She finally succeeded and took the letter in a triumphant gesture.
"So, go to the owlery Griphook, and I'll come and visit you later, ok?"
The owlet growled in disapproval, but finally accepted to leave.
"You're cruel with your pet, Minerva, Albus said smiling
-Yes I know, that's what my father says, but I must balance his way of spoiling him. You should see how he treats him! You would think he's a baby, or a little prince, or whatever..."
Albus laughed, and she opened her letter.
She scanned it quickly.
"I'll read it carefully later, it's ok, no surprising news, she told Albus... Though he has obviously known from the Daily Prophet about Grindewald and those children... doesn't seems to know Pr Diggory teaches here... Curious he didn't read it in the Daily... Surely he didn't even read it carefully, must find it boring...
-Why boring?
-He's a muggle Albus! That's not really his world, so..."
He chuckled.
"Yea, right... How comes he receives it, though?
-We took a subscription last summer. He wanted to be informed, since I would come and... Well, in a way, I live in this world now. So he wants to keep in touch with it, you know.
-Oh"

The sky was darkening, so they came back in, no much time after, and Minerva could read her letter. There was nothing special in it, but letters from home were always reassuring, like something to grab, not to dwell in that strange, difficult world she had to live in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Lil, wake up!"

No answer.

"LIL'!!"

Still nothing… a groan…

"Milane! came a sleepy voice from the depth of a pillow, why on earth are you yelling at us at this hour of the morning on a Saturday?"

Milane laughed.

"What? the same voice asked quite briskly, why are you laughing?"

"Well, it's not that early, Min', it's half nine!

-Half nine? You're joking, aren't you?

-Naa…"

   Minerva's curtains were pulled opened. She spotted the responsible for the trouble, sat on her bed, hugging her pillow, and Lilian's snores told her one of them still wasn't awoken… Though she wondered how Lilian could sleep through that racket… Never mind,

"Where's Joyce, anyway?

-She's had an early breakfast, and she went for a walk with Dedalus Diggle this morning…

-Oh…, she acknowledged quietly… WHAT? She went for a what with whom?

-Calm down, Min', they're not marrying! … yet!

-Thanks, that's calming! And you didn't even tell me?

-Well, you were out there, again, flirting with Albus!

-Oh I wasn't! And you know it!

-Yea, 'f course I know… but it's funny the way you can become as red as the curtains…"

Minerva threw her pillow at her, and Milane threw herself in response, on Minerva, with their two pillows in her hands…

"Arggh!!!" "Stop it!" "GRMPH" "Nooo" "Oh! No tickle, That's not fair" "Yiip" "GRAW"

  Lilian opened an eye. What was that whole noise about?

"PFIOU" "HMPH" "OH NO! NOT AGAIN!!" "TCHCHCH"

  She opened her second eye, stretched herself and yawned. The dormitory was bathed in hot light coming from the East window, which reflected on Lilian's red bed curtains… A peaceful morning in a peaceful tower… wouldn't it be for those two fury not far from her, just behind the curtain…

"YOU SILLY…" "AHHHH" "GOT YOU" "GNACH"

  What were they doing on Minerva's bed?… She deepened her head in the pillow, under the sheets… still no silence… She tried again… No, she couldn't get back to sleep in that uproar. So she unwillingly half sat against the corner of her bed, and partially opened her curtains… and stayed shocked at the point of view she had on the scene…

  Telling whose arm was which and whose leg seemed to her much more difficult than identify their voice… Then perhaps it was the early hour and her state of half-sleep… yea, it would be that…

"Hey, Minerva?, she tried to articulate, Err… Milane? Any problem?"

They both stopped at the same time, Milane's arm in the air, Minerva's jaw still open… There was a silence, and Lilian stared at them in disbelief… Obviously that was curious, and it had nothing to do with her own degree of wakefulness.

    She exchanged a glance with Minerva. Then Minerva and Milane looked at each other. The silence became heavy… And all three of them exploded in an uncontrolled laugh.

"So, what was that about? Lilian finally asked when she got her breath back, five minutes at least after,

-Well, I see we awoke you, at least! Milane just woke me up, trying to yell at you!

-That can explain the situation?

-By the way, did you know Joyce was on the ground with a boy, this morning?, Minerva went on, ignoring her question,

-Yea, I know… That Hufflepuff…" she seemed to scan her memory "What's his name, again?

-Dedalus Diggle, he was on the boat with Milane and me, on the first day… Milane just told me!

-Yea, yea… Is she already at breakfast?, Lilian asked,

-Well… Milane wants us to believe it's half nine…

-It is!" Milane repeated energetically,

Lilian yawned again.

"Half nine?

-Well, rather a quarter to ten now, to be precise…

-Oh, I can't believe it, where went the night? I feel like I've slept 4 hours or less… Lilian complained.

-I don't know… I feel like I haven't slept properly since a week, Minerva said,

-Me either" Milane added…

They made silence… Each of them knew why they hadn't slept too well.

"That's that awkward atmosphere in the castle, since… since Monday…, Minerva pointed out,

-Yea, it's creepy" Lilian agreed

Nobody seemed about to laugh any more,

"Come on, stop it girl, we're not going to keep wailing… we've got to find something funny to do! … It's Saturday!"

But nobody seemed to care about Saturday and funny stuff…

"He comes back on Monday… What do you think the first lesson will be like that morning?" Minerva wondered aloud.

Nobody answered, no one seemed to even want to come near any answer to that.

"Ok… I'll take the bathroom", Minerva said, and she got up. "I've got that homework of potion to do… I'll be in the Library later, if you want to catch on with History of magic" it had been Minerva's week of taking notes in pr Binns' lessons.

Minerva opened the door of the bathroom.

"Don't you plan to eat? None of us have had breakfast! Perhaps we can catch something if we hurry?" Milane suggested.

"Not hungry, somehow" And she stepped in the bathroom. On for a whole day of homework.

      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    That evening, Minerva's and Albus' steps led them to the Quidditch Pitch. They made small talk, and sat. Albus even put warming charm on them, so that they wouldn't freeze…

 "Isn't Quidditch very dangerous, Albus?

-Quite, quite…

-Oh…

-But all sports are, aren't they? he said, his smile back in place,

-Yea, perhaps… you're right of course…"

She became silent, and looked at the sun, slowly setting down… The breeze was a bit cold, but she didn't mind, most thanks to Albus' charm… Why couldn't moments like this last until ever… Albus big brotherly presence seemed to protect… No, more than just protect. He seemed to understand, to know what she told him…

"Albus?

-Yea…

-We'll have him first, on Monday morning"

He looked like he knew what she was talking about, for which she felt very grateful.

"Yes, you will."

She sighed.

"I don't look forward to it.

-Of course not, he said seriously… Who would?"

She hesitated.

"You know…  the others don't look like it bothers them…

-Oh… Don't they?…"

She shook her head.

"You know, he said, I think they just don't want to think of it. They try to forget…

-That's silly! She felt a bit snappy at her classmate, with whom she had been unable to share her apprehension all day.

-Is it?

-They'll have to get on with it, in the end…

-Yes, obviously.

-So why do they refuse?

-Do you think they're aware of it?"

She didn't answer.

He took a deep breath, and sighed.

"You know, Min', I guess it's a way to handle it, not to realize until it stands just in front of you

-I wish I could, then.

-Don't.

-They're happier, you told it yourself…

-I don't know… It looks like a strength, to be aware of it, doesn't it?"

She noticed that the sun was now touching the earth, on the horizon. And she let a playful smile briefly fly on her lips…

"Albus?

-Yea?

-Milane is drowning on you…

-Why? He questioned,

-You called me 'Min'…"

He chuckled, and she smiled at him.

      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    The following Monday was definitely the day Professor Diggory was to come back, in everybody's mind. Not just a Monday, not the equinox (though it was), but his return… Most of the student and the staff around Minerva had found again a normal behaviour during the Weekend. Some of them had slept to forget, others discussed, other daydreamt, analysed, anything… But each one had approximately found his way out of it. The shock was over. She suspected that the thoughts had stayed in everyone's mind, however, just like in hers, sad, depressing, not that far from the surface, and could emerge at any moment, for most often no apparent reason. Touching someone in the middle of a sentence, of a word, of a laugh, making everything die with their appearance, and bringing contagion for everyone who saw their owner, rapidly. Because no one ignored what could catch a cheerful mind in no time and make the happiness die. But generally, if you didn't count that continual Damocles' sword, the Hall was back to normal on Sunday evening… well, to what he usually was, if you could call it normal!

    Nobody really looked forward to their first lesson with Pr Diggory, though, and the First Year Gryffindor, being the first on Monday morning first Period, felt a real apprehension about it. Not that they weren't genuinely happy to have their Professor back… But you couldn't say the conditions were the best on earth. As they all finally had to check their notes on Sunday afternoon, so that they wouldn't have forgotten all the basics they had had to learn, they all had to realize, like Minerva, that they would face this lesson, with their well known Professor, who somehow seemed not to be their known Professor any more, but a total frightening stranger. And awkwardness settled. Again. They wanted to be kind and helpful with him, and natural, not to add to this shock he had already had. But still, it wouldn't be easy. So on Sunday evening, they went to Dinner without the playful manner first year usually seemed to radiate at Hogwarts… The whole lot of them seemed to have regressed to the state the entire castle had got through on Tuesday morning, which was saying something. They were all more or less sat together, at the Gryffindor table, and a lot of people, Minerva noticed, seemed to eye them with compassion… As if thinking on why they found it so difficult to pass over it. Perhaps it was their age… Perhaps the fact that they would be the first to meet him back… Most certainly the combination of both. And the fact that Pr Diggory was eating at the Staff Table undeniably didn't help either. But anyway they were depressively apprehensive.

    When the dessert appeared, though, Headmaster Neminos stood up.

"Ehem… Just a few words, please, before you throw yourself on the chocolate cake. Boys, girls… The professors and I wanted to express our awareness of the difficult times we all have to go through. As I hope you are all informed, we are here to help you if you feel it necessary to talk… To any of us." At this Pr Burret made a sceptic face, and several Staff members Minerva didn't know glared at the Headmaster in such a way that it was very clear they didn't want, on the top of their own problems, all the school in their studies to discuss psychological difficulties. "Well, I also wanted to express to Pr Diggory, back among us, our sincere collective condolences, to which I'm sure all of you contribute, and our deep compassion… Thanks for your attention."

    Several Sixth Year Ravenclaw rose silently, then some Hufflepuff, lots of Gryffindor, and soon nearly the whole Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff tables had stood up, along with most of the Gryffindor and numerous Slytherin. Some of them stared at their feet or the table, Minerva noted, but lots of them, like her, had their eyes turned on their Professor.

    This one scanned the Hall. Then he simply nodded, but a weak smile played on his lips, making his tired face nearer to life, and he mouthed a thanks. So they all sat, still silent. Their eyes started to meet each other again, and they recalled why they were there. Their chocolate cake, still waiting for them, looked very appetizing, indeed, and cheered them up a bit.

     Soon, a quiet noise of chatting had filled the Great Hall again.

    You still couldn't say the students were impatient to return to their transfiguration lessons, but that could help, especially for those who should have been the first to see him back. That first contact to the school had somehow discharge them of a great part of the pressure, even if it concretely didn't changed anything. Or so Minerva thought, nodding off in an armchair this evening, next to the fire again, while Albus, Alastor and Carola discussed an article of the Daily Prophet that seemed to worry the boys very much.

                                                              ***

    Wow, that was difficult to write. Really need your opinion, this time… It was difficult for me to describe the collective reaction. I had to live that sort of event once, though the person who died was actually a student we all knew quite well… And I tried to recall what it was like but… You know, there was that strange kind of fog which always seems to bath all the painful events we lived through… Was it Ok? Not too complicated or intricate? Please, review!!!