"Moments."

"Moments."
Part twenty-five of the "What Am I?" series.
Rating: R. for the entire series.
Spoilers: I don't have the time or the energy to go through and state exactly what spoilers are contained in my fics just assume that anything that has aired in the US is fair game.
Disclaimers: Joss owns everything fun. I only borrow it for a while.
Feedback: Let me know what you think. (ladyduvessa19@icqmail.com)

They walked through the graveyard hand in hand towards his crypt. It was strange. He never thought of them as the hand holding types. It was actually bordering on uncomfortable. They fought, they didn't hold hands, but he kept his fingers laced with hers because maybe that's what she wanted. He knew she was still getting over the shock of telling everyone. Her face started blankly into nothing. She didn't speak. She was his and now the whole world could know it. They might not be happy about it, but they could know.

"Do you smell smoke?" she asked stopping.

They were close enough to his crypt, but not close enough to see it. *Oh yeah the fire.* he thought and then said "I think your right." Trying to hide the fact that he wasn't surprised.

Buffy dropped his hand and turned around clearly trying to figure out where the smell was coming from. She began walking and Spike followed her. He knew that she was looking for a demon. She was always looking for a demon, but then again they were always in a graveyard so it really wasn't all that strange.

She stopped again. He had been looking at the ground as he walked not sure if he wanted her to figure out where the smoke was coming from, but he looked up when she spoke. "Fire trucks. They're at your crypt." She said pointing.

His eyes landed at the flashing lights coming from the trucks. And then he saw the burned shell of what used to be his home. He looked away. He didn't think that he had been so attached to the place, but seeing it like that, with the smoke still escaping out the door, he felt like he lost something.

Buffy began walking again and he followed. She started talking to the first fireman she saw. "What happened?" she asked the fireman who stood there covered in soot from being inside.

"There was a fire." The man said and then turned away from her writing something on his clipboard.

Spike knew that wasn't going to be a good enough answer for her and he wasn't surprised when she walked around the man and began asking more questions. "I know there was a fire Sherlock. But why was there a fire?"

"Miss I can't discuss this with you. This is a crime scene." The man said and started walking away.

Buffy followed him. "A crime scene? You mean you think this was arson? Are you sure it wasn't just an accident. You know like a candle left burning or something?"

The fireman turned to her. "Miss I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

She ignored him. "Were there any bodies inside?" she asked and the fireman looked shocked.

"Hey Chad, looks like we've got our proof." A man yelled from across the way holding up a gas can.

"I'll be there in a minute." 'Chad' the fireman yelled and then he turned back to Buffy. "What do you know about this place?"

"Oh nothing." She lied.

"Why would you wonder about bodies?" Chad asked.

"Bodies. What? Oh, just wanted to make sure no one was hurt." She lied again.

Chad wasn't buying it. "You wanted to make sure no one was hurt."

"Uh-Huh"

"What do you know about the person who was living here?" Chad asked.

"Living here? Who would want to live here?" Buffy asked.

"I don't know. You tell me. We found furniture. A bed, a couch, a TV. There was even a refrigerator." Chad said sort of laughing under his breath.

"Strange." Buffy said and the second that Chad was called by the other firefighters she grabbed Spikes coat and pulled him away.

When they were far enough away so that no one could hear or see them she spoke. "I thought you put the candles out?"

"I bloody did." He lied. "Didn't you see Chad's little friend with a gas can? This fire wasn't started by a bunch of candles left burning."

"Good point. But who would set your crypt on fire?" she asked and then added. "Never mind. Anyone would want to set your crypt on fire." With a little too much emphasis on 'anyone'.

"Hey!" he shouted at the realization of her insult.

"What? It's not my fault your list of enemies is about a mile long." She said innocently.

"Yeah well lets just go. Can't do noting about it now." He said starting to walk away.

"Wait." She called after him. "What about Drusilla and Aurora?"

"What about 'em?"

"Do you think they're dead?" she asked.

"Don't know. Don't really care. Besides how are you supposed to find out? If Dru went down in that blaze of glory she's just more ashes for the fire department to sweep up." He said knowing that Dru had died. He had watched as her body caught fire. He had watched, as she didn't move. He had watched as she started to fade. He had watched and he had said goodbye.

"But what about Aurora? She said she can't die unless you die." Buffy said and Spike could tell that she was worried.

"Even if everything she said was true and she won't kick it until I die she is still nice and crispy after the fire." He said trying to reassure her.

"But what if they're the ones who did this? What if they set the fire?"

"Don't do that slayer. Don't play the what if game. They were tied up. They couldn't move. And if by some god awful chance they are alive you'll fight them. You'll fight them and you'll win." She smiled at his words.

"You sure are taking this well." She said still smiling.

"Well what can I say, I'm not clingy." He said looking in the direction of him charred home.

"But that was where you lived and Drusilla was your…" she trailed off and then started again "You were together for a long time." She added quietly looking away from his face.

"Drusilla isn't a part of my life anymore. I don't care what happens to her. And I'll find another place to live." He reached out and grabbed her hand. Placing it inside his own just as it was before. She smiled at his gesture and they began walking.

"So I guess you'll be needing a place to stay." She said resting her head on his shoulder as they walked.

"You offering?" he asked shocked.

"I guess so. I mean you don't have somewhere else you'd rather stay do you?"

"There's no where I'd rather stay." He said and they continued in silence to her house.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they walked in the door, they found Willow and Dawn watching television.

"Buffy you're here." Willow said standing from the couch.

"Yeah I kinda live here." Buffy replied.

"I know. I just wasn't sure, you know with the whole Angel/Xander not being supportive, if you'd be back here tonight." Willow said nervously and then added "Hi Spike."

"Hey Red." He said.

"How bad was it?" Buffy asked.

"After you left Angel and Xander tried to convince us that we should try to break you guys up." Dawn answered.

"They what?" Buffy said.

"Yeah there was that and some big plan that involved Spike, Holy Water, a bath tub, and some handcuffs." Willow said.

"OK. I'm really hoping the plan was about killing Spike slowly. Cause otherwise EW." Buffy said flatly.

"Since when do we want me dead?" Spike said.

"Since the alternative to that scenario would leave me scarred for life." Buffy said.

"Don't worry. No scarring for life. Just tortured, dead Spike." Willow said reassuring her friend.

"So where are they?" Buffy asked.

"Well Xander kept saying that you couldn't love Spike because he is a worthless, soulless thing. So Anya got really mad and started yelling at him about how she used to be a demon. It kinda got ugly and then she left and told Xander not to bother coming home." Dawn said.

"So where did he go?" Buffy asked.

"With Angel." Willow said. "When Anya told Xander he couldn't go home Angel said he could stay with him and Connor at the Inn."

"Oh isn't that priceless. Xander and Angel bonding over the fact that they hate me. Staying alone in a dark cozy hotel room. And they make such a cute little family with Angel Jr." Spike said holding back a laugh while Buffy glared at him.

"So how long do you think it will take them to get over this?" Buffy asked picking Dawns half finished can of soda up off the coffee table.

"I'm betting close to never." Dawn said.

"It's just going to take them time Buffy. Maybe if you talk to them. You know try to explain." Willow said. She always tried to look at the best in every situation.

"I'll talk to them later." Buffy said. "By the way, Spikes going to be staying here for awhile."

"He's what? This is so great!" Dawn said a little too excitedly.

"Dawn." Buffy said looking disapprovingly at her sister. "Spikes crypt was set on fire."

"Sorry." Dawn said.

"What happened?" Willow asked.

"Don't really know. Got burnt." Spike said.

"Buffy isn't there somewhere else he could stay? I mean this is hard on Xander as it is. I don't think Spike living here with you is going to make that better." Willow said.

"It's only until he finds somewhere else. And besides he'll just be sleeping on the couch." Buffy said and Spike was disappointed. He was looking forward to her falling asleep in his arms.

"OK, but if Xander asks I put up a fight." Willow stated.

"Yep. A fight complete with hair pulling." Buffy said smiling at her friend.

"Well I think I'm going to head off to bed. Only 4 more hours till I have to be in homeroom." Dawn said yawning.

"I'm sorry Dawnie. One of these days we're going to have a normal night. One where were home by 8:00, watch horrible shows on primetime TV, and get to sleep before the sun starts to come up." Buffy said.

"No big deal. I have math first hour. Perfect time for a nap." Dawn said and headed up the stairs.

"When did I become such a bad parent?" Buffy asked.

"You're not Buffy. You've just got a lot going on." Willow said once again trying to make the best of things. "I think I'm going to follow Dawn and head up to bed. You should think about getting some sleep too Buffy."

"I will. I'm just going to get some blankets and stuff for Spike." Buffy said watching her friend head up the stairs.

"So you want silk sheets or fuzzy blankets?" Buffy asked Spike.

"What you got on your bed?" He asked moving closer to her. She started to say something, but he didn't let her finish. He brought his mouth to hers and kissed her for the first time since she told her friends. His hands found themselves on the back of her head, getting tangled in her hair, trying to pull her closer. He didn't know when it happened, but they had somehow managed to find themselves on the couch with him on top of her. She was warm while he was cold. It wasn't until the night that they were in the old abandoned building, and brought the walls down, that he first noticed how alive she was. Her life warmed his cold dead skin every time she touched him. He loved that she could make him feel alive. Then he came to the realization that she was alive and unlike him needed to breathe. He broke the contact their mouths had. She was panting. Inhaling and exhaling deeply and he found himself doing the same. Then she pushed him off her.

"Fuzzy blankets it is." She said standing.

"Oh come on, you don't need to make a bed up for me. There's one upstairs I'd much rather be in." he said.

"You're sleeping on the couch Spike." She said firmly.

"Why?"

"Because the last thing I need is for Dawn to see you coming out of my room in the morning."

"I thought that after you told your friends about us we wouldn't have to hide anymore." He said.

"We're not hiding. We're just not letting my little sister know about my sex life." Buffy said.

"Right. Because she still looks at you like the blushing virgin. Please slayer. Your sister isn't stupid. And she isn't as little as you lot think she is. You don't need to hide things from her." He said.

"No, But I don't need to add fuel to her imagination. She thinks the world of you Spike. Did you see the look in her eyes when I told everyone about us? And what about the look just now when I told her you would be staying here?"

"She was glad."

"She was bouncing off the walls happy. And that worries me. This needs to go slow for her. Because if this doesn't work you don't only break my heart. You break hers too." Buffy said.

"Buffy I would never." Realizing exactly how good a mother she was to the 'lil bit. "The couch it is." He said giving in.

She left the room and returned with sheets and a pillow.

"Do you mind if I watch a little telly? If it'll keep you up I won't. It's just I'm not all that tired." Spike asked as she started making the couch into a bed.

"I'm not really tired either. Mind if I watch with you?" she asked.

"Not at all." He said and helped her with the sheets. Then they both sat down. She rested her head on his chest and grabbed the remote.

She began pushing buttons and stopped when she hit MTV. It was one of those damn boy bands that looked pretty and danced around lip-synching to horrible music. "Bloody hell slayer. We're not watching that."

"Why not?" she asked.

"Because it's not music that's why." He said grabbing the remote from her hands. He flipped for a while and found a re-run of Dawson's Creek.

"And this is so much better." She said disapproving of his choice in programs.

"At lest this has a plot." He said.

"And such a good one." She said sarcastically and he switched the channel. He flipped and flipped and finally landed on the TV guide channel.

They both watched the programs run across the screen. Spike saw nothing that he wanted to watch. The guide just kept scrolling.

"Trading Spaces!" Buffy said grabbing the remote out of his hands.

"What the hell is that?" he asked.

"It's a show." She said turning it on. "Oh good. It's one with Ty."

"Who the hell is Ty?"

"He's the carpenter." Buffy said.

"And he does what exactly."

"He builds things for the designers. They have two teams and they trade houses and decorate a room in the others home." She said.

"I'm not watching a show about decorating and designers."

"No. Heaven forbid people might think you were soft. It's those soap operas that make you so manly. No be quiet it's almost the end." She said and he fell silent.

He guessed it wasn't so bad. They had a hammer and were beating shit with it. And none of their projects were working out. It was kind of funny. And it didn't matter. He just liked the closeness between him and Buffy. Then at the end of the show the woman hated what was done to her house so much she started crying. It made Spike laugh. But Buffy didn't move. She had fallen asleep. *So much for the niblet not knowing we spent the night together.* he thought knowing that he should bring her up to her room, but at the same time not wanting to wake her. So he just let her sleep. Caught up in the moment of actually doing something normal with her.

Part 24 || Part 26