Chapter 2
My fever was gone the next day. My companions finally let me out of bed. I lounged on the couch with a glass of orange juice and watched the news. Reports on the World Trade Center were coming in and videos of it falling were being played over and over again. Outside, the light was failing.
Duo ran in frantically and shut the door on a gaggle of adolescent girls. He skidded in front of me and grabbed my hands, bowing over them.
"Heero! Heero! You've got to help me!"
"You're blocking the news." I tried to push him out of the way but he hung on stubbornly.
"Please, oh please, Heero!" he whined.
I sighed and turned off the television. "What is it?"
"I need a boyfriend!" he cried.
I blinked. I wasn't expecting that. "I'm not 'Heero, the Instant- Boyfriend'."
"But-"
"Explain." I growled. This was going nowhere.
"See, a while ago, I met these girls. I think they fell in love with me or something. But anyway, they wanted me to go out with one of them, but I didn't want to, so I told them I was gay. They said they didn't care and wanted to go out anyway! So I told them I had a boyfriend. Then they said they wanted to meet him! Gah! What am I going to do? Help me, Heero!"
"Did you ever think to tell them he was on a business trip in America or something?"
"I did that a month ago! They asked when was he coming back and I said today! Now they want to meet him! Help me, Heero! Please, I'll do anything!"
"Get Wufei to do it." Wufei would surely be willing to fake it for a price.
"But everybody knows he's straight! They'll never believe it! And don't even mention Quatre or Trowa. Everybody already knows they're together and if they thought I broke them up, they'd beat the shit out of me!" He was whining now. He looked like he really needed the help.
"Fine." I growled. "But make it fast."
"Great!" he shouted and grabbed my arm and pulled me out the door. We were swamped immediately by ten or so girls. They crowded the hallway and we pressed against the wall.
"Uh, hi girls." Duo started to sweat. "This is-this is-Heero, my boyfriend, yeah!" They looked me up and down and frowned.
I growled under my breath.
"Yeah, he's just got back from that business trip, so he's kinda tired. So, uh, we'll be going now."
They pushed against the door, keeping it shut. "We want proof!"
"Uh." Duo was at a loss as to what to do.
"We want proof that he's not just one of your buddies that you conned into faking a relationship with you!"
They wanted proof, eh? "How's this for proof," I growled. Pressing Duo against the wall, I wrapped one arm around his slim waist and one around his shoulders and captured his lips in my own. My eyes bored into his, his were wide with shock. Fireworks seemed to go off and stars shimmered, while the girls swooned and made catcalls. Duo's arms curled around my neck and his tongue gave my lower lip a tentative lick. I nearly gave in and opened my mouth to him. I broke the kiss off, my knees weak, but before I could get away, Duo slung an arm around my waist. He looked disappointed but pleased nonetheless.
"Proof enough for ya, ladies?" The idiot grinned before ushering me inside after they nodded dumbly.
"Wow, Heero, just wow. That was-that was-"
"Shut up." I stalked away from him and climbed into my window seat, yanking the curtains shut behind me. I could not believe I did that. That was the single most stupid thing I've done in my entire life. Especially since I kept my eyes open. Anything can be read in the eyes.
After a few minutes I opened the window. Climbing onto the sloping roof, I climbed the short distance to the top of the doghouse window. Straddling the peak, I gazed at the stars. I reached up to grasp them, but my hand closed on nothing. Like everything else in life, they were out of reach.
A week later, Mr. Smith came for me again. Afterwards, I contracted the same fever I had had before. Once again, I awoke without memory of the fever and with a massive headache and slight bruising.
Throwing on a pair of sweats, I made my way to the kitchen. Inside, Duo tried to catch my eye. He'd been doing that all week, ever since I kissed him. I ignored him more than ever. I suppressed a groan at the growing pain behind my eyes. I started walking towards the cabinets, but I physically stumbled at a sharp stab of agony. Another one hit and I fell against the cabinets, my vision wavering. The lights were too bright and stung my eyes. Duo stood up quickly and moved towards me. The sound of his chair hitting the floor sounded like a rocket in my ears. I fumbled with the door of the medicine cabinet and managed to get it open. My hands quaked and knocked the small bottles around, unable to grasp even one. The next stab of pain was like a blow to the head. I collapsed but felt hands grab me under the arms. I peered upwards, wincing at the light, through the haze to see Duo trying to hold me up while I thrashed. "Leggo." I mumbled.
"QUATRE!!! QUATRE! TROWA! SOMEBODY GET IN HERE!!" Duo screamed. His voice shattered my eardrums. I didn't realize I was screaming until Quatre came running in with his ears covered. He sprinted to my side, with Trowa close behind. My vision faded in and out, the pain itself keeping me from passing out. Trowa ran out again and retrieved his medical bag. He reached inside and pulled out a bottle of clear liquid and a syringe. Filling the needle up he pushed it into the crook of my elbow and oblivion claimed my mind.
I was still recovering two days later. Trowa had gotten migraine pills from Dr. J, along with a liquid form that could be injected into me as a last resort. I lay on the couch, bundled in a blanket, too weak to walk far. I hated to be weak. I despised the situation and slow recovery. A pounding on the door brought Quatre running out of the kitchen with his hands covered in flour.
"Where's Heero?" a voice growled. I grimaced. It was Mr. Smith. I tried to get up but found I couldn't.
"Heero's ill. He can't come out." I sighed with relief and allowed myself a small smile. God bless Quatre. But my luck was not to last.
Mr. Smith pushed his way in and found me. With one arm under my legs and one supporting my shoulders, he made a suitable excuse to Blondie and took me out to his limo. I tried feebly to wrap the blanket around me but he ripped it off and left it in the hall. Inside his limousine, he did the same as always. There was never any variation.
Then he kicked me out onto the curb and drove away. I crawled to the apartment stoop and sat down, resting my head against the banister. I shivered, despite the thick summer heat. I lost track of time while I waited there, unable to make it back to the apartment. My vision blurred and flowers seemed to grow out of the sidewalk. Elephants ran down the road and gingerbread people walked by. I began to sweat and my head drooped.
Something overshadowed me then. I looked up to see a few of the gingerbread men. One had a three-foot chestnut braid.
"Heero?" The lilting voice called out to me. It blurred and the world turned sideways as I toppled over into the gingerbread men. I blacked out.
"Heero, explain yourself." The other Gundam pilots were gathered around me. They all glared at me and I closed my eyes. Once again I tried to shield my eyes with an arm, but failed. The other boys had tied me down while I was still unconscious. It was almost enough to cut off the circulation.
Duo looked furious. "What do you do with Mr. Smith, huh? It's obvious that whatever it is, it's inducing these fevers and adding to the migraines. What's going on Heero?"
"Is he testing drugs on you?" Quatre's face was creased with worry.
I turned my head aside. "My problems are not yours. Leave me alone."
Wufei was furious. "This had better stop by the end of the summer, Yuy! Or your problems will become ours because they will interfere with missions. You need to be in top condition, Yuy. So make sure it stops."
I didn't say anything else and they left the room.
I was fully recovered in under a week.
The others knew something was going on, but they didn't know what. Life continued normally and I became my usual self.
I sat in my window seat. Wufei was at the gym and the two Lovebirds were checking on the Gundams. I was all alone with Duo.
I debated going out, when a heart-shaped face popped through the curtains.
"Can I come in?" Duo chirped.
"No." I never let him in. He should know that by now.
He frowned but didn't withdraw. For the first time, he came in anyway. He squeezed himself in across from me, crossing his legs Indian style. Our knees pressed together. I moved to leave. I could barely resist him when he was this close in a confined space. But he flung out an arm and stopped me.
"I saw that group of girls again. They've given up on me. They really believed we were a couple. Can you believe that? When you kissed me, they said we practically melded together. We looked like we were one being." He was breathing softly.
"It was just a kiss Duo." I didn't look at him, but kept my head turned away.
He grabbed my hands and I kept them loose and unmoving. "But it can be more than that, Heero!" He grabbed my chin and turned it toward him. "It can be much more than that!"
I jerked my head away. "No, no, it can't."
"Yes. It. Can!" He said each word clearly. He grabbed my chin again and once more I was facing him. I trembled.
"No, Duo, n-"
He leaned over me and kissed me. I stubbornly kept my lips firmly closed and fought him, but the enclosed space gave him the advantage. He managed to keep his lips on mine and soon his arms were around me. I tried to fight but found myself weak and limp. He broke it off and gazed into my eyes. I closed them and he leaned in for another kiss, this time gentler. I let him. I no longer had the mental strength to fight. I grew hot as he traced my lower lip with his tongue. I opened my mouth for him and he probed inside, both of us caught in a euphoric bliss.
The afternoon lengthened as we embraced. Duo left a trail of wet kisses down my bare chest-my shirt had come off sometime earlier-before reclaiming my lips. Finally, exhausted, we slouched against the wall. Duo held me, but I still kept my arms at my side. We breathed heavily, sweating slightly.
"So, this means we're together now, huh?" The sentence from Duo was not a question, but a statement.
My heart clenched in a tight spasm of fear. "No!" I pushed away from him and tumbled out of the window seat, my legs weak and shaking. I backed up quickly until I hit the couch and used it to lever myself into a standing position, still using the piece of furniture as a prop. I grabbed my tank and pulled it over my head.
Duo shoved the curtains aside and leaned out, a look of confusion and slight anger on his face. "What are you afraid of Heero? What the hell are you afraid of?!"
I scrambled out of the room and took the stairs eight at a time. I ran past Wufei at the door and Quatre and Trowa on the street. Sprinting at a ground-and energy-devouring pace, I covered half the city in ten minutes. It took another four hours of running for me to figure out that all this time, it wasn't Duo I had been protecting. I had been protecting myself.
I ran well into the wee hours of the morning, circling the city many times, before I stopped in front of the apartment building. Dredging up my last bits of reserve energy, I dragged myself to the elevator and then into the apartment. Quatre and Duo were sitting on the couch, with bags under their eyes-Duo's eyes were pink. I was surprised. They never stayed up this late. They got up at my entrance and Duo moved as if to put his arms around me. I quickly shoved away and hurtled into my room and locked the door. Kicking off my sneakers, I climbed into my blankets and wrapped them around me protectively. The Braided Wonder knocked and rattled the doorknob, but I ignored him. The phone rang and Quatre answered it, his muffled voice making the conversation short before he hung up. Ten minutes later Trowa and Wufei came through the door and slammed it shut. Duo started talking to Wufei and soon something clicked within the lock on the door and Wufei opened it.
"Maxwell wants to talk to you, Yuy," he growled. I didn't say anything. Duo came in and shut the door behind him, isolating the two of us.
"Heero." He called softly. "Heero, talk to me." I turned my face away from him. "Did I do something wrong? Did I kiss too hard? Are you uncomfortable not being the dominant one?"
"Hn." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Look, Heero, I know for a fact that you enjoyed those kisses." He kneeled by me and touched my shoulder. "Damnit, Heero! I want you! What are you afraid of?!"
I didn't answer.
Duo got up and opened the door. He turned his head back towards me. "I will have you, Heero. I will." He shut the door behind him.
I squeezed my eyes closed, fighting the tears that where threatening to spill. Slowly, I drifted into nightmares of my past. I slept for two days, replacing the energy I lost in my frantic run.
I stumbled into the kitchen, my legs still weak and hurting. Annoyed, I reminded myself that energy can be regenerated in a long sleep; muscles can't. Trowa eyed me over his coffee and told me "not to run myself into the ground again. Pun intended." Now I was being punned. Wasn't life just peachy?
Duo wouldn't stop looking at me. I avoided his gaze while I roamed through the fridge. Grabbing some leftovers, I quickly ate them. I didn't even register what I was eating.
Wufei was at the gym. Again. Quatre was grocery shopping.
A voice startled me. "Hey Heero?"
"Hn." I wished Duo would leave me alone. He'd only confuse me more. I hadn't even had time yet to analyze these feelings that I wasn't supposed to have!
Trowa got up and left the room after hearing Quatre come in the door, arms laden with groceries.
"Heero, what do you want?" Duo gazed at me enquiringly.
I couldn't answer him. But before he could enquire further, Trowa bustled in and started to put food away. I snuck out the door while he blocked Duo. I planned to go out, but was stopped at the door by Quatre. He took me to his room and I followed, stumbling slightly. He pulled two chairs out from a corner and placed them facing each other. He sat down and gestured for me to do the same. I clenched my hands in my lap and looked away from him at the floor.
"Heero, I realize that it is difficult for you to talk to others about your problems. But you have to open up to somebody. Or you'll burst."
I didn't reply, but fiddled with my fingers. He was careful not to touch me.
"Heero, tell me. What do you want?"
I closed my eyes. "Nothing."
"Nothing? Are you sure?"
I shook my head. "I-I want-Duo." It felt like the words were being forced out of me. I didn't know why I was telling him all this. I had no control over what I said or did for these few minutes that Quatre managed to crack my shell.
"Well, that's simple. He wants you, too."
"No. no. I can't." I shook my head as I spoke, trying to clear my head of all confusion.
"Why not, Heero?" He peered quizzically at me. Those damn blue eyes tore everything out of me.
"I'm afraid."
"Of what?" His voice was gentle, soothing even. It lulled me without my knowing.
"I don't know." My voice shook slightly. I wasn't sure if he noticed.
"Tell me how you feel when you think of Duo."
"I-I don't know. I don't know anything."
"Tell me, Heero. Think of Duo."
"I feel-warm. And fuzzy, if you'll believe it. But it hurts. It hurts so much."
"My Space Heart aches for you, Heero. Why does it hurt?"
"Because I can't have him."
"But he wants you. He told me so himself. He told me everything. I think he needs you, Heero. Don't hurt him like this."
"Leave me alone, Quatre, just leave me alone."
"You can't live like this. It's tearing both of you apart." He forced my head up and glared into my eyes, daring me to defy what I felt in my heart. He forced me back to my first memory of Duo.
"What's up with this guy, Q-man? Is he an android or something?" The voice broke my concentration, causing me to drop my wrench into Wing's arm. It clattered off of steel-encased wires and clanged its way deeper and deeper. Cursing, I levered myself up and faced the intruder.
"I was working, baka!" I spat at the newcomer before I could stop myself. It was the first time I let my temper get the best of me. I glared my best death glare at the figure next to Quatre. He had one hand on his hip and was eyeing me skeptically, completely unafraid. Some sort of funky preacher's outfit clung to his thin form and a long braid trailed down his back. Lengthy bangs nearly hid his violet eyes from me. I went back to work without a second thought.
I got up and moved towards the door. Quatre's arm on my shoulder stopped me.
"Where are you going, Duo? We haven't finished talking yet."
"I have to protect myself and stay at top-functioning condition. I'm going for retraining."
(sorry but I've probably got most of the characters wrong because I've only seen five episodes a long time ago and Endless Waltz a gazillion times, RxR please! Oh and I've started an FF8 fanfic so read that (Squall/Irvine))
My fever was gone the next day. My companions finally let me out of bed. I lounged on the couch with a glass of orange juice and watched the news. Reports on the World Trade Center were coming in and videos of it falling were being played over and over again. Outside, the light was failing.
Duo ran in frantically and shut the door on a gaggle of adolescent girls. He skidded in front of me and grabbed my hands, bowing over them.
"Heero! Heero! You've got to help me!"
"You're blocking the news." I tried to push him out of the way but he hung on stubbornly.
"Please, oh please, Heero!" he whined.
I sighed and turned off the television. "What is it?"
"I need a boyfriend!" he cried.
I blinked. I wasn't expecting that. "I'm not 'Heero, the Instant- Boyfriend'."
"But-"
"Explain." I growled. This was going nowhere.
"See, a while ago, I met these girls. I think they fell in love with me or something. But anyway, they wanted me to go out with one of them, but I didn't want to, so I told them I was gay. They said they didn't care and wanted to go out anyway! So I told them I had a boyfriend. Then they said they wanted to meet him! Gah! What am I going to do? Help me, Heero!"
"Did you ever think to tell them he was on a business trip in America or something?"
"I did that a month ago! They asked when was he coming back and I said today! Now they want to meet him! Help me, Heero! Please, I'll do anything!"
"Get Wufei to do it." Wufei would surely be willing to fake it for a price.
"But everybody knows he's straight! They'll never believe it! And don't even mention Quatre or Trowa. Everybody already knows they're together and if they thought I broke them up, they'd beat the shit out of me!" He was whining now. He looked like he really needed the help.
"Fine." I growled. "But make it fast."
"Great!" he shouted and grabbed my arm and pulled me out the door. We were swamped immediately by ten or so girls. They crowded the hallway and we pressed against the wall.
"Uh, hi girls." Duo started to sweat. "This is-this is-Heero, my boyfriend, yeah!" They looked me up and down and frowned.
I growled under my breath.
"Yeah, he's just got back from that business trip, so he's kinda tired. So, uh, we'll be going now."
They pushed against the door, keeping it shut. "We want proof!"
"Uh." Duo was at a loss as to what to do.
"We want proof that he's not just one of your buddies that you conned into faking a relationship with you!"
They wanted proof, eh? "How's this for proof," I growled. Pressing Duo against the wall, I wrapped one arm around his slim waist and one around his shoulders and captured his lips in my own. My eyes bored into his, his were wide with shock. Fireworks seemed to go off and stars shimmered, while the girls swooned and made catcalls. Duo's arms curled around my neck and his tongue gave my lower lip a tentative lick. I nearly gave in and opened my mouth to him. I broke the kiss off, my knees weak, but before I could get away, Duo slung an arm around my waist. He looked disappointed but pleased nonetheless.
"Proof enough for ya, ladies?" The idiot grinned before ushering me inside after they nodded dumbly.
"Wow, Heero, just wow. That was-that was-"
"Shut up." I stalked away from him and climbed into my window seat, yanking the curtains shut behind me. I could not believe I did that. That was the single most stupid thing I've done in my entire life. Especially since I kept my eyes open. Anything can be read in the eyes.
After a few minutes I opened the window. Climbing onto the sloping roof, I climbed the short distance to the top of the doghouse window. Straddling the peak, I gazed at the stars. I reached up to grasp them, but my hand closed on nothing. Like everything else in life, they were out of reach.
A week later, Mr. Smith came for me again. Afterwards, I contracted the same fever I had had before. Once again, I awoke without memory of the fever and with a massive headache and slight bruising.
Throwing on a pair of sweats, I made my way to the kitchen. Inside, Duo tried to catch my eye. He'd been doing that all week, ever since I kissed him. I ignored him more than ever. I suppressed a groan at the growing pain behind my eyes. I started walking towards the cabinets, but I physically stumbled at a sharp stab of agony. Another one hit and I fell against the cabinets, my vision wavering. The lights were too bright and stung my eyes. Duo stood up quickly and moved towards me. The sound of his chair hitting the floor sounded like a rocket in my ears. I fumbled with the door of the medicine cabinet and managed to get it open. My hands quaked and knocked the small bottles around, unable to grasp even one. The next stab of pain was like a blow to the head. I collapsed but felt hands grab me under the arms. I peered upwards, wincing at the light, through the haze to see Duo trying to hold me up while I thrashed. "Leggo." I mumbled.
"QUATRE!!! QUATRE! TROWA! SOMEBODY GET IN HERE!!" Duo screamed. His voice shattered my eardrums. I didn't realize I was screaming until Quatre came running in with his ears covered. He sprinted to my side, with Trowa close behind. My vision faded in and out, the pain itself keeping me from passing out. Trowa ran out again and retrieved his medical bag. He reached inside and pulled out a bottle of clear liquid and a syringe. Filling the needle up he pushed it into the crook of my elbow and oblivion claimed my mind.
I was still recovering two days later. Trowa had gotten migraine pills from Dr. J, along with a liquid form that could be injected into me as a last resort. I lay on the couch, bundled in a blanket, too weak to walk far. I hated to be weak. I despised the situation and slow recovery. A pounding on the door brought Quatre running out of the kitchen with his hands covered in flour.
"Where's Heero?" a voice growled. I grimaced. It was Mr. Smith. I tried to get up but found I couldn't.
"Heero's ill. He can't come out." I sighed with relief and allowed myself a small smile. God bless Quatre. But my luck was not to last.
Mr. Smith pushed his way in and found me. With one arm under my legs and one supporting my shoulders, he made a suitable excuse to Blondie and took me out to his limo. I tried feebly to wrap the blanket around me but he ripped it off and left it in the hall. Inside his limousine, he did the same as always. There was never any variation.
Then he kicked me out onto the curb and drove away. I crawled to the apartment stoop and sat down, resting my head against the banister. I shivered, despite the thick summer heat. I lost track of time while I waited there, unable to make it back to the apartment. My vision blurred and flowers seemed to grow out of the sidewalk. Elephants ran down the road and gingerbread people walked by. I began to sweat and my head drooped.
Something overshadowed me then. I looked up to see a few of the gingerbread men. One had a three-foot chestnut braid.
"Heero?" The lilting voice called out to me. It blurred and the world turned sideways as I toppled over into the gingerbread men. I blacked out.
"Heero, explain yourself." The other Gundam pilots were gathered around me. They all glared at me and I closed my eyes. Once again I tried to shield my eyes with an arm, but failed. The other boys had tied me down while I was still unconscious. It was almost enough to cut off the circulation.
Duo looked furious. "What do you do with Mr. Smith, huh? It's obvious that whatever it is, it's inducing these fevers and adding to the migraines. What's going on Heero?"
"Is he testing drugs on you?" Quatre's face was creased with worry.
I turned my head aside. "My problems are not yours. Leave me alone."
Wufei was furious. "This had better stop by the end of the summer, Yuy! Or your problems will become ours because they will interfere with missions. You need to be in top condition, Yuy. So make sure it stops."
I didn't say anything else and they left the room.
I was fully recovered in under a week.
The others knew something was going on, but they didn't know what. Life continued normally and I became my usual self.
I sat in my window seat. Wufei was at the gym and the two Lovebirds were checking on the Gundams. I was all alone with Duo.
I debated going out, when a heart-shaped face popped through the curtains.
"Can I come in?" Duo chirped.
"No." I never let him in. He should know that by now.
He frowned but didn't withdraw. For the first time, he came in anyway. He squeezed himself in across from me, crossing his legs Indian style. Our knees pressed together. I moved to leave. I could barely resist him when he was this close in a confined space. But he flung out an arm and stopped me.
"I saw that group of girls again. They've given up on me. They really believed we were a couple. Can you believe that? When you kissed me, they said we practically melded together. We looked like we were one being." He was breathing softly.
"It was just a kiss Duo." I didn't look at him, but kept my head turned away.
He grabbed my hands and I kept them loose and unmoving. "But it can be more than that, Heero!" He grabbed my chin and turned it toward him. "It can be much more than that!"
I jerked my head away. "No, no, it can't."
"Yes. It. Can!" He said each word clearly. He grabbed my chin again and once more I was facing him. I trembled.
"No, Duo, n-"
He leaned over me and kissed me. I stubbornly kept my lips firmly closed and fought him, but the enclosed space gave him the advantage. He managed to keep his lips on mine and soon his arms were around me. I tried to fight but found myself weak and limp. He broke it off and gazed into my eyes. I closed them and he leaned in for another kiss, this time gentler. I let him. I no longer had the mental strength to fight. I grew hot as he traced my lower lip with his tongue. I opened my mouth for him and he probed inside, both of us caught in a euphoric bliss.
The afternoon lengthened as we embraced. Duo left a trail of wet kisses down my bare chest-my shirt had come off sometime earlier-before reclaiming my lips. Finally, exhausted, we slouched against the wall. Duo held me, but I still kept my arms at my side. We breathed heavily, sweating slightly.
"So, this means we're together now, huh?" The sentence from Duo was not a question, but a statement.
My heart clenched in a tight spasm of fear. "No!" I pushed away from him and tumbled out of the window seat, my legs weak and shaking. I backed up quickly until I hit the couch and used it to lever myself into a standing position, still using the piece of furniture as a prop. I grabbed my tank and pulled it over my head.
Duo shoved the curtains aside and leaned out, a look of confusion and slight anger on his face. "What are you afraid of Heero? What the hell are you afraid of?!"
I scrambled out of the room and took the stairs eight at a time. I ran past Wufei at the door and Quatre and Trowa on the street. Sprinting at a ground-and energy-devouring pace, I covered half the city in ten minutes. It took another four hours of running for me to figure out that all this time, it wasn't Duo I had been protecting. I had been protecting myself.
I ran well into the wee hours of the morning, circling the city many times, before I stopped in front of the apartment building. Dredging up my last bits of reserve energy, I dragged myself to the elevator and then into the apartment. Quatre and Duo were sitting on the couch, with bags under their eyes-Duo's eyes were pink. I was surprised. They never stayed up this late. They got up at my entrance and Duo moved as if to put his arms around me. I quickly shoved away and hurtled into my room and locked the door. Kicking off my sneakers, I climbed into my blankets and wrapped them around me protectively. The Braided Wonder knocked and rattled the doorknob, but I ignored him. The phone rang and Quatre answered it, his muffled voice making the conversation short before he hung up. Ten minutes later Trowa and Wufei came through the door and slammed it shut. Duo started talking to Wufei and soon something clicked within the lock on the door and Wufei opened it.
"Maxwell wants to talk to you, Yuy," he growled. I didn't say anything. Duo came in and shut the door behind him, isolating the two of us.
"Heero." He called softly. "Heero, talk to me." I turned my face away from him. "Did I do something wrong? Did I kiss too hard? Are you uncomfortable not being the dominant one?"
"Hn." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Look, Heero, I know for a fact that you enjoyed those kisses." He kneeled by me and touched my shoulder. "Damnit, Heero! I want you! What are you afraid of?!"
I didn't answer.
Duo got up and opened the door. He turned his head back towards me. "I will have you, Heero. I will." He shut the door behind him.
I squeezed my eyes closed, fighting the tears that where threatening to spill. Slowly, I drifted into nightmares of my past. I slept for two days, replacing the energy I lost in my frantic run.
I stumbled into the kitchen, my legs still weak and hurting. Annoyed, I reminded myself that energy can be regenerated in a long sleep; muscles can't. Trowa eyed me over his coffee and told me "not to run myself into the ground again. Pun intended." Now I was being punned. Wasn't life just peachy?
Duo wouldn't stop looking at me. I avoided his gaze while I roamed through the fridge. Grabbing some leftovers, I quickly ate them. I didn't even register what I was eating.
Wufei was at the gym. Again. Quatre was grocery shopping.
A voice startled me. "Hey Heero?"
"Hn." I wished Duo would leave me alone. He'd only confuse me more. I hadn't even had time yet to analyze these feelings that I wasn't supposed to have!
Trowa got up and left the room after hearing Quatre come in the door, arms laden with groceries.
"Heero, what do you want?" Duo gazed at me enquiringly.
I couldn't answer him. But before he could enquire further, Trowa bustled in and started to put food away. I snuck out the door while he blocked Duo. I planned to go out, but was stopped at the door by Quatre. He took me to his room and I followed, stumbling slightly. He pulled two chairs out from a corner and placed them facing each other. He sat down and gestured for me to do the same. I clenched my hands in my lap and looked away from him at the floor.
"Heero, I realize that it is difficult for you to talk to others about your problems. But you have to open up to somebody. Or you'll burst."
I didn't reply, but fiddled with my fingers. He was careful not to touch me.
"Heero, tell me. What do you want?"
I closed my eyes. "Nothing."
"Nothing? Are you sure?"
I shook my head. "I-I want-Duo." It felt like the words were being forced out of me. I didn't know why I was telling him all this. I had no control over what I said or did for these few minutes that Quatre managed to crack my shell.
"Well, that's simple. He wants you, too."
"No. no. I can't." I shook my head as I spoke, trying to clear my head of all confusion.
"Why not, Heero?" He peered quizzically at me. Those damn blue eyes tore everything out of me.
"I'm afraid."
"Of what?" His voice was gentle, soothing even. It lulled me without my knowing.
"I don't know." My voice shook slightly. I wasn't sure if he noticed.
"Tell me how you feel when you think of Duo."
"I-I don't know. I don't know anything."
"Tell me, Heero. Think of Duo."
"I feel-warm. And fuzzy, if you'll believe it. But it hurts. It hurts so much."
"My Space Heart aches for you, Heero. Why does it hurt?"
"Because I can't have him."
"But he wants you. He told me so himself. He told me everything. I think he needs you, Heero. Don't hurt him like this."
"Leave me alone, Quatre, just leave me alone."
"You can't live like this. It's tearing both of you apart." He forced my head up and glared into my eyes, daring me to defy what I felt in my heart. He forced me back to my first memory of Duo.
"What's up with this guy, Q-man? Is he an android or something?" The voice broke my concentration, causing me to drop my wrench into Wing's arm. It clattered off of steel-encased wires and clanged its way deeper and deeper. Cursing, I levered myself up and faced the intruder.
"I was working, baka!" I spat at the newcomer before I could stop myself. It was the first time I let my temper get the best of me. I glared my best death glare at the figure next to Quatre. He had one hand on his hip and was eyeing me skeptically, completely unafraid. Some sort of funky preacher's outfit clung to his thin form and a long braid trailed down his back. Lengthy bangs nearly hid his violet eyes from me. I went back to work without a second thought.
I got up and moved towards the door. Quatre's arm on my shoulder stopped me.
"Where are you going, Duo? We haven't finished talking yet."
"I have to protect myself and stay at top-functioning condition. I'm going for retraining."
(sorry but I've probably got most of the characters wrong because I've only seen five episodes a long time ago and Endless Waltz a gazillion times, RxR please! Oh and I've started an FF8 fanfic so read that (Squall/Irvine))