Author: Lil
Title: Trip to London
Summary: Just imagine you're a Muggle with the chance to visit Hogwarts… and to take part in the lessons, witness the fight over a unicorn foal with special powers, enjoy yourselves in Hogsmeade with the normal pupils… for 2 weeks. It's great!!! You want to read it!!! wields
magic wand
Category: Drama/Action/Romance/Humor… it's got everything!!!
Warning: Character death (not one of the main characters); and Snape washes his hair. Scary thought, isn't it?
Rating: PG-13 for mild swearing and implied sexuality (noooooo, not the one(s) you think… rather the least expected one)
Thanks: I know Lil wants to thank me (Ene) for beta-ing, writing the above and not interfering with the creative process *g* (meaning: Ene only did beta and is not responsible for contents)
Disclaimer: Lil belongs to herself, I belong to myself, and the rest belongs to Mrs Rowling or whoever she sold them to (careless, really)
Notes: Should anybody dare to flame Lil, Ene's wrath will come upon you (sans candlestick and following…*lol*) and the curse of Mary Malone and her seven blind orphans will come to haunt you so far over land and sea that God the Almighty won't even find you with a radio telescope. (This wording belongs to the author of a Star Trek novel, but I've forgotten which one so I also can't name the author. Shame on me.) You get the point, I presume.
Short notice: This story is also available in German. Please contact me for that!
The journey
By the end of August Lil's telephone rang; it was Ene. "Lil, I finally finished my homework in public law," it raved out of the handset.
"My, great!" Lil roared back.
"Exactly"; Ene said, "and after all that stress from university, homework, and Middle-earth I definitely deserved myself a fine vacation. Let's go to London, go shopping, eat a lot, and hang around. I bid highest at ebay for a travel voucher, 20 Euros only; it's good enough for two train tickets to London. We only have to care for lodging. What do you say?"
Lil didn't consider it long: "I can hardly hold back. Gimme two days, I have to take leave first and then I'll phone you again, o.k.?"
"Okeedokie!"
All worked out just fine, and so both of them reached London after various interchange transactions in Cologne, Paris and….( the voucher wasn't good enough for trains like ICE or TGV) on September 1, a Sunday. King's Cross Station was overcrowded, noisy, and it was extremely hot – a heatwave was swashing over Great Britain, no, not really swashing over but sticking right there. 34° C in the shade! Even in the train Ene and Lil had almost been dissolving, especially since an elderly lady insisted on closed windows "for there's such a terrible draft". Now, the two girls just let themselves drop down to the platform with all their baggage and leaned against a stone pillar that wasn't cool, either.
"Tip some chili sauce over me and I'll pass as roasted chicken", Ene moaned and lifted a half-full bottle of Coke to her lips. The bottle emptied amazingly quick.
"Over there is an iceman's carriage", Lil said, "you think we'd make ourselves unpleasantly conspicuous if we put our legs inside?"
"So what, at a pinch I could feign a circulatory collapse", Ene replied.
Lil puckered her brow: "We still have to ask for accomodation at the tourist info but if I enter the brooding underground now I'll just melt away – even without being in love. I have to cool down here first."
"No problem, stay here, I just go to carry some Coke away." Ene got up moaning and groaning and walked rusty-like in the direction of the ladies room.
Lil sighed and steered. 'I wish I was in a dreamland without scorching heat and so many people. My, is it crowded here," she thought. Innumerable travellers with overloaded baggage cars flitted by on all sides. An old song came to her mind: 'Islands in the stream, that is what we are... Geez, some people seem to travel with their complete household. Oh, wow, such an old leather suitcase! Now, what's that? Looks like a parrot's birdcage. Does that poor animal have to take a train in all this heat? That verges on cruelty to animals. How can a single child have such a heap of baggage? Well, Old Man, quite hard to balance the suitcase in one hand and the open bottle of beer in the other, right? And – hey, where can the car with the birdcage be?' Lil leaned to the left and then to the right to look past the next pillar but there was nothing to see. "Hasty child", Lil thought. And the next kiddie showed up with a baggage car that seemed to defy gravitiy, otherwise the wheels would long have succumbed. 'Goodness gracious, isn't there a related grown-up to help? The child ruptures herself by pushing.' Lil stared fixedly at this slip of a little girl who with her overfull car made straight for a barrier with a wall behind it. 'Good Heavens, the maid can't stop the car!" Lil jumped up and saw – and saw… how car and child disappeared into the wall.
Lil's jaw dropped, she leaned against the pillar again, and skidded down. She rooted for a headache tablet and a water bottle in her rucksack, and while she was washing down the tablet she could see from the corners of her eyes how two other teenagers disappeared into the wall; but these two had looked around before disappearing - however the woman with the bottle at her mouth might have seemed sufficiently diverted to them.
Behind herself Lil heard an excited female voice: " And I repeated again and again: Don't pack up so many things, how will you bring all this to the train when outside of the school you're not allowed to – well, you know! You'll neeeeever get through the barrier with three lugagge cars at the same time! And your father is not dispensable, as usual. I won't accompany you up to the platform, bad enough I have to push one car and pull another one. So, you have to pass through the barrier three times, that's what happens if you don't listen to your mother."
A seemingly frustrated blonde boy shoved a baggage car past Lil by supreme effort. Behind him walked, groching about and perspiring, a lady all in white: high heels, tight skirt, giant hat, and fur jacket. She looked like being sandwiched in between the two cars she had been scolding so much about and her scolding didn't stop: "And time presses. How will you manage this in time, Gideon?"
"If I weren't blocked by your long speeches, I could long be gone", Gideon grumbled.
"Oh, so that's what you can get! I won't take such bad manners from my own son! I hope they'll cure you of that in school, soon!" And the lady turned on her heel and let the cars simply stand besides Gideon. He only looked moaning to the ceiling and then went for the wall with the first car.
Ene came back. "D'you feel cooler, Lil?"
"Wha?" Lil asked absentmindedly.
"You o.k.?" Ene asked.
Lil seemed to be roused from a dream. "Oh, yeah, sure, and now I want fun! Grab your rucksack and come!" Ene followed Lil to the next pillar behind which she seemed to hide.
"What are you up to, Lil?"
"Shh, wait a moment and then we'll hop on this car under the big cloth."
Ene opened her eyes wide: "Under the cloth? Isn't it warm enough for you?"
Lil ignored the question and watched Gideon coming back to fetch the second car. The third car still stood around unsupervised. Right in front of the pushing handle there was a high tower on the car covered with a hanging cloth but at the front the car appeared to be empty, and the cloth hung over the front end like a tent. As Lil saw Gideon disappear into the wall again she pulled Ene's sleeve and both slipped - without anyone taking notice – under the cloth and huddled up with their rucksacks so there wouldn't form a dent in the cloth.
Ene whispered to Lil: "Now, what's that gonna be?"
Lil gave her a momentous look and whispered in return: "Ene, we both experienced some really crazy things together but this here might become the cherry on the cream topping on the chocolate pudding. Think of Star Trek, Star Wars, Middle-earth, and that almost everything is possible."
Just a few seconds later the car moved but because of the cloth they couldn't see where they were driven to. Ene and Lil concentrated on wondrous worlds which were removed from reality – or seemed to be. There was a fizzing sound, it became dark for a moment, the background noise appeared to have changed, and finally the car halted.
"Stop, stop, careful with that suitcase!" Gideon's voice rang through the cloth and steps moved quickly away from the car.
Cautiously, Lil peered from under the cloth and then said: "Outta here!"
Ene followed Lil hastily to – what else should it have been – another pillar and asked reproachfully: "What was this to be? Fun? Do we have completely different points of view concerning fun? I've had better times before. Do I look like an old leather-bag you want me to act as luggage?"
"Oh, really", Lil asked, "and do you know where we are?"
"Lemme guess: London, King's Cross?"
Lil grinned: "Not bad, Ene! But here we have the opportunity for a much better journey than planned. Look here!" And Lil dragged Ene from behind the pillar and pointed to a big steam locomotive. It was beautifully painted and right at the front was written in golden letters: Hogwarts Express.
Ene disappeared behind the pillar again and gasped for breath: "Ohno-ohno-ohno! You are insane!"
Lil seemed amazed: "Yes, but that's nothing new anymore."
Ene was peeved. "Go away! I'm still sated by Middle-earth. I need rest and relaxation, Burger King and Soho – but no wizard's school!"
"Tommyrot, Ene! You've been to London so often and you can come here almost anytime, but Hogwarts? Darling, we'll never get a chance like this again." Lil tried to be very convincing. It seemed to work.
Ene let her shoulders drop and said: "Yes, o.k., you're right. But IT'S YOUR FAULT, no matter what happens! And you have to take care for our trip back!"
"Sure, I'll do anything!" Lil laughed, "but now we have to see how we can enter the train without a ticket. The conductors here check the tickets when you're boarding."
"Ah yes, looks like a damn short journey", Ene said. Lil's reproachful glance made Ene look to the ground with well performed shame.
"Nix", Lil replied, "This laddie here, Gideon, who pushed us through the wall, has got such an awful lot of baggage he won't be able to load all the stuff without the conductor's help. And when Mr Check-it lends a hand we'll scurry into a compartment."
For a while they watched Gideon's baggage problems. Gideon discussed shortly with the conductor and then the two of them shoved Gideon's baggage to a waggon at the rear. This was the hoped-for opportunity: Ene and Lil jacked into the train, went past two, three compartments which weren't fully occupied, and then found an empty compartment. In, door shut, sit – great! They sighed with relief.
"Eating -finally!" Lil exclaimed and unwrapped a cheese baguette she had bought at the Paris train station.
"Break off a morsel for me", Ene said and Lil gave her a piece. Ene ate a few bites but then she started to cough nervously.
"What's wrong? Allergic to crumbs? Then gimme all your cookies right now!" Lil said dryly.
Ene mixed coughing and laughing but shook her head. "No, no allergy, and dismiss my cookies from your thoughts. I was just thinking: Do the magically gifted people perceive that we lack this talent? Will we immediately be recognized as lepers?"
Lil thought for a moment. "I hope not, I mean, they surely can perceive it but for the fact that they certainly don't expect any muggels here their suspicion should be limited – so with a little luck we might…"
"Hope, mean, might? That doesn't sound comforting to me. Be more precise!" Ene interposed.
"You're a good one", Lil said, "I didn't memorize the Harry Potter books."
Ene moaned: "We're driving headlong to our doom!"
"My, think positive", Lil drawled, "Say to yourself: We're driving headlong to a great adventure! That sounds a whole lot better. Pansy!"
Ene had finished her piece of the baguette, folded up the armrests of her row of seats, and draped herself over three seats. "You surely can't distinguish between witch and muggle when it comes to sleeping persons", she said and closed her eyes.
Lil was still chewing and watched the platform. Then they heard a shrill whistle and the hissing of steam. A jolt shook the train.
"Are we moving?" Ene asked and lifted her head to look out of the window.
Lil gave her a disbelieving look: "No, just for you they pull the landscape past the train today."
The train ran through the country for more than an hour, now. Ene had actually fallen asleep. Lil listened to "Hair" on her Walkman and looked out of the window. She didn't notice the figure in front of the door eyeing the inside of the compartment. Finally, the door was opened and immediately shoved close again. A young woman with a black cloak and rankly spreading brown hair let herself sink on a seat besides Lil, folded her arms angrily before her chest, and pouted: "Men! Catastrophes on two legs!"
These words had even been louder than Lil's music.
"Ain't I right?" the young woman asked Lil.
Lil took her headset down, switched off the walkman, and said: "Yes, completely! But sometimes they're useful for rough-working."
The young woman smiled: "For VERY rough workings, so" she said and reached out her hand for Lil, "Hi, my name is Hermione Granger. I'm in this year's graduating class. I can't remember having seen you in Hogwarts before."
Lil cleared her throat and was looking for a plausible excuse: "Hi, my name is Lil-Wen Ceslas. I've never been to Hogwarts before. But your name sounds quite familiar to me."
Hermione lifted her eyebrows and replied: "Could be due to all the fuss about Harry Potter. Thankfully, not everyone notices at once. Actually, someone from Hogwarts blabbed out a secret at a friend's and then it showed that this friend is an author. What luck that in the wizard's world they don't pay much attention to muggels books. But where our worlds meet it was unbearable at times. The books have been bad enough, and then this movie! Last year, Professor Dumbledore really considered to postpone the date of enrollment from September 1. because kids were hanging around on the platform to see us depart for Hogwarts. Isn't that awful? From which school do you come – and your friend here that I also don't know and who apparently won't wake?"
'Damn, I thought she forgot!' it flashed through Lil's mind. "Ehm, a very small, unknown school in the Hindukush, not worth talking about. But that is exactly why we want to do a practical training at famous Hogwarts. Everybody needs to have something to show for oneself, right? Please, tell me a few details about what we're to expect when we'll arrive, now! I can hardly wait!"
With this she hit the right spot with Hermione because she was very proud of her school and could talk about it for hours. She did have something of a mistress but Lil tried as good as possible to store up all the information Hermione was letting out.
"Yey," Hermione said when it was already dark outside, "we'll be there, soon. I have to go back to my compartment and fetch a few things, but then I'll come back and accompany you to the school building, so I can show you this and that. Till then!" and while leaving she murmured: "If Ron doesn't apologize, his evening is already over!"
Ene sat up and said: "My goodness, she's talking like a waterfall! Do they mix prattle potation in their classes?"
"If yes she must have consumed about a hectoliter of it," Lil answered, "my ears need rest. How long have you been awake?"
"Lil, with this continuing torrent of words it is impossible for me to estimate. Maybe one hour but it seemed like seven to me."
Lil told Ene quickly what she made up in her need of finding satisfying answers to Hermiones questions. And suddenly Hermione was back.
"Ah, hello, we haven't been acquainted with each other, my name is Hermione Granger."
"Ene-Rys Walim," Ene said tired and took the hand of the young witch.
"Strange names", Hermione said, "one notices at once you're not from here."
To nip further questions to their persons in the bud Lil changed topic: "What about Ron? Did he apologize? And for what exactly?"
Hermione draw a deep breath and looked decidedly serious before she started: "Yes, for his own luck he apologized, but I'm not sure he really understood the problem – we'll have to talk about that intensively. Well, it's simply unbelievable what he advised me to do! For the final year I have to decide on an elective, and I was uncertain if I should take 'Deepened knowledge of magical plants of Africa' or 'Curses and maledictions in context of world religions'. And what did Ron say? He recommended to take the course: 'Masterly cooking for young witches' and adding, eventually I could think of our future together! Can you imagine?"
"What a macho!" Ene answered indignantly.
"Does he take the course 'Ironing for idiots?', then?" Lil asked.
Hermione felt herself well understood as her contently smiling face was showing without doubt. She smoothed her long hair back and continued with superior indifferent mien: "Of course, I immediately drew his attention to the fact that with this esteem of my abilities he can just send our FUTURE TOGETHER down the drain. Love is all very well and good, but he can't expect me with my prospects for the future to limit myself just to think about the welfare of his belly. I'm afraid he didn't wean himself sufficiently from his mother – well, no wonder with this super-mother. And Harry always tries to mediate, then; he should enter the diplomatic service. Unfortunately he doesn't understand that a proper quarrel forms an essential part of it. He is so badly in need for harmony. With Ron I can excellently row, that's good! And I love it when he aplogizes..." The train slowed down.
"Going straight to the carriages might be the best thing to do, so we're gone ahead of the greatest rush."
"And ahead of your dream man," Ene added.
"Be quiet!" Hermione said with an amused side-glance.