Pained
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. If I did, I would... you don't wanna know ^.~
A/N: Yay! My first ficcie here on fanfiction.net. Hopefully someone will like it. It's shounen-ai so do keep that in mind. Review please!!
Pairings: dark Yuusuke+Kurama
As the moon rose and shone into an open window, a solitary figure was outlined. Red hair contrasted brightly against the darkness of the room.
"..." A soft murmur passed from his lips, followed by painful sobs. Body trembling, Kurama curled into a tight ball on his bed, unable to fall asleep. It has become a habit to cry soundlessly while his mother slept. Sometimes Hiei would visit so he kept the window open just in case. Hiei has become a friend who he could turn to, someone who kept him from going off the deep end.
Kurama didn't know how long he could keep on going like this, heart bleeding again and again. He knew he should give up, but he couldn't.
Kurama remembered how he fell in love with his teammate and friend a long while ago, how sweet and torturous it was, but it was nothing compared to this. He loved Yuusuke, there was no denying of it. When in the end, he gathered all his courage and told Yuusuke his deepest secret he had hoped for the best. It was cruel the way Yuusuke laughed at him and said he wasn't worth it. He thought his heart broke that instant, but it broke again when he watched Yuusuke and Keiko marry.
That night when Yuusuke came to his house, stinking with the odor of alcohol, he should have refused to let him in. But no, he had to be the polite and helpful Kurama who still loved Yuusuke. He let Yuusuke stay and when Yuusuke asked for his virginity, he gave it without hesitation. How stupid he had been, thinking that maybe Yuusuke had a place for him in his heart.
From then on, Yuusuke always came to him after a big fight with Keiko. Kurama became his reliever. After a night of sex Yuusuke would return to Keiko and continue with their happy life.
Oh, he had the chance to stop this, but again and again he yielded. His confused mind argued that being with Yuusuke, even under the circumstances, was better than not having him at all.
Once when Kurama accidently whispered "I love you" to Yuusuke during their session, Yuusuke slapped him hard across the face and told him that nobody was to say that except Keiko. He didn't dare to say anything else afterwards.
His heart ached every time he saw the love Yuusuke showed Keiko while for him there was only pain and grimace. To Yuusuke he was something expandable, someone who was there.
Kurama's POV
A gust of wind woke me from my memories, instantly I recognized Hiei. "Kurama..." I could hear the pity in his voice, 'I don't need your pity! I need Yuusuke's love, even if just for a second...' I screamed mentally. I still haven't learned that Yuusuke will never love me; I'm still hoping. So foolish of me...
I leaned into Hiei's embrace as he comforted me. "When will this torture end?" I choked out the words hoarsely, knowing there'll be no reply. "I don't know, Kurama. If you could just say no to him..." Hiei whispered back. 'I know, I know, if I could just stop loving him, but I can't...' And as darkness welcomed me, I prepared my heart for another painful day.
I know this is so sad, but I promise it'll get better in the next chapter. I'm sorry I had to make Yuusuke such a bastard, *ducks a tomato* but he'll get nicer and the story is going to have a happy ending! ^^
See that blue button there near the bottom? If you click on it and write something nice, I'll be very very happy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. If I did, I would... you don't wanna know ^.~
A/N: Yay! My first ficcie here on fanfiction.net. Hopefully someone will like it. It's shounen-ai so do keep that in mind. Review please!!
Pairings: dark Yuusuke+Kurama
As the moon rose and shone into an open window, a solitary figure was outlined. Red hair contrasted brightly against the darkness of the room.
"..." A soft murmur passed from his lips, followed by painful sobs. Body trembling, Kurama curled into a tight ball on his bed, unable to fall asleep. It has become a habit to cry soundlessly while his mother slept. Sometimes Hiei would visit so he kept the window open just in case. Hiei has become a friend who he could turn to, someone who kept him from going off the deep end.
Kurama didn't know how long he could keep on going like this, heart bleeding again and again. He knew he should give up, but he couldn't.
Kurama remembered how he fell in love with his teammate and friend a long while ago, how sweet and torturous it was, but it was nothing compared to this. He loved Yuusuke, there was no denying of it. When in the end, he gathered all his courage and told Yuusuke his deepest secret he had hoped for the best. It was cruel the way Yuusuke laughed at him and said he wasn't worth it. He thought his heart broke that instant, but it broke again when he watched Yuusuke and Keiko marry.
That night when Yuusuke came to his house, stinking with the odor of alcohol, he should have refused to let him in. But no, he had to be the polite and helpful Kurama who still loved Yuusuke. He let Yuusuke stay and when Yuusuke asked for his virginity, he gave it without hesitation. How stupid he had been, thinking that maybe Yuusuke had a place for him in his heart.
From then on, Yuusuke always came to him after a big fight with Keiko. Kurama became his reliever. After a night of sex Yuusuke would return to Keiko and continue with their happy life.
Oh, he had the chance to stop this, but again and again he yielded. His confused mind argued that being with Yuusuke, even under the circumstances, was better than not having him at all.
Once when Kurama accidently whispered "I love you" to Yuusuke during their session, Yuusuke slapped him hard across the face and told him that nobody was to say that except Keiko. He didn't dare to say anything else afterwards.
His heart ached every time he saw the love Yuusuke showed Keiko while for him there was only pain and grimace. To Yuusuke he was something expandable, someone who was there.
Kurama's POV
A gust of wind woke me from my memories, instantly I recognized Hiei. "Kurama..." I could hear the pity in his voice, 'I don't need your pity! I need Yuusuke's love, even if just for a second...' I screamed mentally. I still haven't learned that Yuusuke will never love me; I'm still hoping. So foolish of me...
I leaned into Hiei's embrace as he comforted me. "When will this torture end?" I choked out the words hoarsely, knowing there'll be no reply. "I don't know, Kurama. If you could just say no to him..." Hiei whispered back. 'I know, I know, if I could just stop loving him, but I can't...' And as darkness welcomed me, I prepared my heart for another painful day.
I know this is so sad, but I promise it'll get better in the next chapter. I'm sorry I had to make Yuusuke such a bastard, *ducks a tomato* but he'll get nicer and the story is going to have a happy ending! ^^
See that blue button there near the bottom? If you click on it and write something nice, I'll be very very happy!