Lydia and Rachel drove to the hospital in silence. All sorts of
thoughts were running through Rachel's head.
Rachel was beating herself up inside, "I never knew Elizabeth. God,
Dad loved her and I was so mean to her. She was there when I got my period,
and all I did was yell at her. I never said thank you. I purposely tried to
mess her Thanksgiving up as much as I could. The thing about the party hat,
the potatoes, the thing about the pilgrims. then I decide to like her only
after I'm stuck with her because Dad marries her. She put up with me, and
probably hates me now, and I might not get to make it up to her. Dad loves
her, and Elizabeth's never done any thing to hurt me or my dad. All she did
was love my dad back."
Rachel let a tear escape from her eye. She didn't bother to wipe it
off. She was too tired. It was almost midnight, and she was exhausted
because her mom had told her about Elizabeth and they had left for the
airport all within twenty minutes.
Rachel's thoughts turned to Ella, "I've never even met her. How
pathetic is that? Some big sister I am. At least I know my parents. Ella
might never remember her mother. Elizabeth might not be there for Ella's
first period. She was there for mine, and I'm not even her daughter. She
might not see Ella take her first steps, or hear her say her first word.
She'll never see Ella on her first day of school, or graduate from college.
She'll miss so much. Ella's so little. She's less than a month old. She
can't lose her mom now. If Elizabeth gets better, I'm moving in with them.
I'm going to make it up to her, and make sure Ella knows her mother better
than I know, or like mine. I'll make sure that Ella knows she has a
sister."
Eventually Rachel fell asleep, like the six-year-old that Lydia
remembered would have done.
____________________________________________
Mark sat there, speechless. He couldn't decide how to respond, or
even process the information fully, for that matter. He silently cried, not
knowing how else to respond. In his life, he had lost so much. He wasn't
prepared or emotionally capable of losing Elizabeth.
First Jenn, though that wasn't much of a loss in itself, he almost
lost Rachel. She had been so close to pushing him out of her life. Then
Susan, who was his best friend. Then both of his parents had died. He had
almost lost his own life, and then there was complications with Elizabeth's
pregnancy with Ella. Now, after all of that, life was dealing him yet
another card.
Romano didn't know what to do, or say. His first inclination was to
say, "She'll be alright," but both he and Mark knew that Elizabeth might
not. So, Romano just kept his mouth shut, not finding anything else to say.
Mark looked up, and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. He just stared at the clock. He couldn't look Romano in the eyes. Mark knew that Romano was pitying him, and he hated that. He didn't want pity. He didn't know what he wanted. He just knew he wanted Elizabeth. There was a soft knock on the door. Romano shifted Ella's weight in his arms, and went to the door. He saw a girl of about twelve standing in front of a nurse, who looked like she was out of breath. Romano was about to say, "This room is occupied right now. You need to find another room," Before Romano could say any thing, the girl said, "Dad?" Romano looked at her. He remembered hearing that Mark did have another daughter. She did look somewhat like Mark. Rachel had never seen her dad like that. Never in her life. She had seen him sad, but there was something different this time. Then Rachel saw it. He wasn't so much sad as he was scared. Rachel didn't like it one bit. She knew something must have happened, and it couldn't have been good. Rachel stepped inside the door, and repeated, "Dad?" Mark looked at Rachel this time, and said, "Hey. Rach. Come here," he opened his arms. Rachel snuggled into her dad's lap, like she had done when she was small. Mark rocked back and forth, like Rachel remembered him doing. Rachel desperately wanted to know what had happened, but common sense told her that she shouldn't ask then. Romano looked on at the scene. Unwittingly, he had begun to rock Ella in his arms in the same fashion that Mark was rocking Rachel. The scene continued like this for a few minutes, until Mark said, "God Rachel." and held her to him protectively. Rachel couldn't take it any more, "Dad." she said cautiously, "What's wrong with Elizabeth? Is she. is she okay? What happened. I mean how did she get here in the first place? Mom wouldn't' tell me any thing." she said, picking her words carefully. Mark sighed, and wiped his eyes, and said, "Elizabeth. honey, Elizabeth got shot," He struggled to get the words out. Rachel drew in a breath, and said, "Dad." "She went into a coma after surgery. other than that, I don't know any thing else." Mark finished. He looked up at Romano, "Unless, you need to tell me something else." Romano did. He needed to tell Mark how Elizabeth got internal bleeding. Mark assumed that it was the bullet. Romano knew it wasn't. He couldn't say it though. The situation was already to awkward, and now that Rachel was there, he couldn't just say it. Romano knew Mark would find out eventually. "I volunteered for this. why did I. I should have had Kerry do it. I have to tell him though." Romano's thoughts were interrupted by, "What is it? There's more than you told me isn't there?" Mark asked. Romano looked at Rachel, and then back at Mark. Mark understood, "Rachel, honey, do you remember where the lounge is?" "Yeah. umm. I'll be there when you're done," Rachel said as she got up. She turned around and gave her dad one last hug, and walked quickly out the door. Mark watched Rachel out the door, until it slammed shut. Mark finally realized that Romano still had Ella in his arms after all this time. "Oh, here, I'll take her," Romano gently placed Ella in her father's arms. After Mark got Ella settled, he looked at Romano expectantly. He didn't say any thing, though, to get his attention. After a few moments, Romano shifted his weight to the other foot and said quickly, "It wasn't the bullet. It was internal bleeding," Mark took a minute to process it. He was pretty sure he understood it, except, he wasn't sure that he did, fully, "What?" "The bullet didn't do any thing. It came out all right. It was internal bleeding. We all. missed it. I guess," Romano said, a bit slower this time. "Damn." That was all Mark said. He didn't have the energy to get to upset this time. He didn't really feel like it either. He sat there for a minute, checking for the fiftieth time that night that it wasn't a nightmare. Unfortunately, it wasn't. Finally, Mark got up and said, "Where's Elizabeth?" "Recovery Room. Ella and Rachel can't go in for three days," Romano warned. Mark knew that, but he was hoping he could get around that. Romano saw the doubt in Mark's eyes and said, "Babies and kids carry tons of germs. More than adults. It's not safe. If Elizabeth gets so much as the sniffles." Romano didn't know how to finish. "Fine." Mark walked out. He made his way to the lounge. Some of the staff noticed, and followed with their eyes. As soon as Mark disappeared into the lounge, they all exchanged glances. In the lounge, Mark found Rachel sitting on one of the couches, finger combing her hair. Rachel hardly looked up at Mark when he came in. Mark hesitated, "I hardly know her," he thought, "What if she doesn't care? What if she just came because Jenn told her?" Mark quickly pushed aside those thoughts when he saw a tear roll down Rachel's cheek. Mark walked over and sat next to his daughter, and let her lean on him, "You have no idea how horrible I feel," she said, her voice cracking. Mark wasn't sure how to respond to that. He didn't know what Rachel was talking about. He was about to say something, when Rachel kept going. "I was such a brat to her at Thanksgiving. I never apologized, and I might never get too. All she'll ever remember me as is a ten-year-old brat," Rachel let the tears flow. She buried her face into her dad's chest. Mark was a bit taken back. He had no idea that Rachel would take it so hard. He rocked Rachel a bit and said, "It's okay honey. It's okay. Elizabeth didn't hold it against you. She was that age, too remember, with divorced parents. She knew what it was like. Don't worry, Rach." Rachel tried to dry her eyes. She only succeeded at calming her self down, because a few tears were still escaping her eyes. Mark wanted to go see Elizabeth, but he couldn't leave Rachel like this. Mark knew he had to be a father first. Romano gazed in on the scene through the window. It was almost mesmerizing, Mark cradling a baby in one hand and hugging his other daughter in his other arm. It would have been a heart-warming scene, if it had been happening under different circumstances. "How'd he take it?" Romano jumped a little, startled. He turned to see Kerry behind him. "Oh. Okay I guess," Romano said, "I kind of left out the part about how Elizabeth got internal bleeding, but. I guess I should have told him," "It's hard, I know. It's difficult enough when it's a total stranger, but when it's someone you know. It's heartbreaking," Kerry said, "I'm sure you did the best you could." Romano remembered the other time when someone on the staff was hurt. "Who told the families of that med student, Ms.Knight, and that resident, the one who." Romano didn't know how to finish. Now definitely wasn't the time to be bringing a drug addiction up, but that was the only way he knew Carter. "Carter?" Kerry guessed. "Yeah. Him. Who told the families?" Kerry wracked her mind for a moment and then said, "Peter Benton told Carter's grandmother, and I believe that it was Elizabeth who told Lucy's mother that she had died." Romano fell silent for a minute, "Do you think I should go in and tell him the rest?" he asked. Kerry shook her head, "No. I know Mark, and he can only handle so much emotion at a time. Give him time to get a handle on this, first. Tell him tomorrow. or I could do it, if you want." Kerry offered. "No," Romano shook his head, "I kind of fell like I owe him at least that much, I mean I was the one who missed the internal bleeding," "No, Robert. We all missed it. Half a dozen people down here, and another half dozen up stairs. It wasn't your fault," Kerry pointed out. "Yeah, I guess. I think it might make me more secure about this though," Deb came up behind them, and said, "Four GSWs are coming in," Romano sighed, "Same guy?" Deb just nodded, and said, "We need help, we're short a trauma surgeon and a doctor." "Right. I'll be right there," Kerry said, "and page Benton. We'll probably need him," "No don't. I'll do this. Benton's over his head up there already," Romano said, "He's going out one surgery, changing, and going into the next. He's the only surgeon on hand. We're trying to get the rest of them in, though. So far though, no luck," Romano said, heading for the ambulance bay. Inside the lounge, Rachel had stopped crying and was leaning on her father. Ella had woken up, but thankfully, hadn't made a peep. Mark was getting a bit antsy to go see Elizabeth, but he contained himself for a while. Finally, when he thought Rachel was okay, he said, "Rachel, I'd like to go see Elizabeth. Would you be okay on your own? I'll drop Ella off at daycare on my way upstairs. "Can I go? Please?" Rachel inquired, looking up. Mark sighed. He knew this would be coming, "Rachel, No one but immediate family can see her, and immediate family that is under eighteen can't go in for three days." Rachel's face fell, "Guess I struck out twice then, didn't I?" Mark realized his mistake and quickly corrected himself, "Elizabeth considers you family, honey. You're a second daughter to her. In three days, if everything. works out, you can go see her," "Okay. yeah, I'll be fine. Go ahead." "Are you sure?" Mark double checked. Rachel nodded and said, "Yeah," Mark gave Rachel a quick squeeze, and kissed her on top of her head, and got up. Mark looked around for someone who wasn't doing any thing, which of course there wasn't any one. Mark really didn't want Rachel to be alone. Mark heard a commotion coming from down the hall. Carter was trying to revive a patient with the paddles, but so far without success. The patient was opened up. Mark didn't bother to ask what had happened to the poor man. Somehow he already knew. Finally, a few doctors and nurses began to congregate at the front desk. Mark spied Kerry in the crowd. He stood on the outside of the crowd, waiting for Kerry to finish talking. ". Look, we need more trauma areas prepared. Convert three exam rooms into trauma stations. All of them need to have the basics for traumas. Halea, go upstairs and tell them that we need two more sets of paddles. We only have enough for three traumas, and at the rate this guy is going, we need to expect a lot more," Kerry took a breath going over her mental list of things she needed to get done, "Oh. Randi, call the police station, and ask them how their doing-" "I did five minutes ago. The guy basically shoots and runs. They can't catch someone like that very easily." Randi said. "My guess is that he's changing clothes a lot. You might wanna see if you can get a picture of this guy for the hospital, I mean all things considering. First the foster home, then the social worker, then Dr.Gr-" Frank stopped short, seeing Mark. Kerry saw Mark also, and said, "Right Frank. You see if you can do that. Everyone else just get ready for the next trauma, and get a lot of blood down here, ready," Kerry made her way through the crowd to Mark, "Is everything. are you okay?" "Umm.yeah, but I have need a favor from you. I wouldn't normally ask this of you, but-" Mark stopped short. "Mark? Mark? What is it? Are you okay?" Kerry asked frantically. Mark's eyes were glued to something in the waiting area. Kerry turned, and followed his gaze. Mark was watching a man who had just walked in and was making his way through the hospital toward them. Kerry turned back towards Mark and said, "Mark? Is something wrong?" Mark quickly turned around and walked quickly, back towards the lounge. He was almost there, when a gun went off.
Mark looked up, and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. He just stared at the clock. He couldn't look Romano in the eyes. Mark knew that Romano was pitying him, and he hated that. He didn't want pity. He didn't know what he wanted. He just knew he wanted Elizabeth. There was a soft knock on the door. Romano shifted Ella's weight in his arms, and went to the door. He saw a girl of about twelve standing in front of a nurse, who looked like she was out of breath. Romano was about to say, "This room is occupied right now. You need to find another room," Before Romano could say any thing, the girl said, "Dad?" Romano looked at her. He remembered hearing that Mark did have another daughter. She did look somewhat like Mark. Rachel had never seen her dad like that. Never in her life. She had seen him sad, but there was something different this time. Then Rachel saw it. He wasn't so much sad as he was scared. Rachel didn't like it one bit. She knew something must have happened, and it couldn't have been good. Rachel stepped inside the door, and repeated, "Dad?" Mark looked at Rachel this time, and said, "Hey. Rach. Come here," he opened his arms. Rachel snuggled into her dad's lap, like she had done when she was small. Mark rocked back and forth, like Rachel remembered him doing. Rachel desperately wanted to know what had happened, but common sense told her that she shouldn't ask then. Romano looked on at the scene. Unwittingly, he had begun to rock Ella in his arms in the same fashion that Mark was rocking Rachel. The scene continued like this for a few minutes, until Mark said, "God Rachel." and held her to him protectively. Rachel couldn't take it any more, "Dad." she said cautiously, "What's wrong with Elizabeth? Is she. is she okay? What happened. I mean how did she get here in the first place? Mom wouldn't' tell me any thing." she said, picking her words carefully. Mark sighed, and wiped his eyes, and said, "Elizabeth. honey, Elizabeth got shot," He struggled to get the words out. Rachel drew in a breath, and said, "Dad." "She went into a coma after surgery. other than that, I don't know any thing else." Mark finished. He looked up at Romano, "Unless, you need to tell me something else." Romano did. He needed to tell Mark how Elizabeth got internal bleeding. Mark assumed that it was the bullet. Romano knew it wasn't. He couldn't say it though. The situation was already to awkward, and now that Rachel was there, he couldn't just say it. Romano knew Mark would find out eventually. "I volunteered for this. why did I. I should have had Kerry do it. I have to tell him though." Romano's thoughts were interrupted by, "What is it? There's more than you told me isn't there?" Mark asked. Romano looked at Rachel, and then back at Mark. Mark understood, "Rachel, honey, do you remember where the lounge is?" "Yeah. umm. I'll be there when you're done," Rachel said as she got up. She turned around and gave her dad one last hug, and walked quickly out the door. Mark watched Rachel out the door, until it slammed shut. Mark finally realized that Romano still had Ella in his arms after all this time. "Oh, here, I'll take her," Romano gently placed Ella in her father's arms. After Mark got Ella settled, he looked at Romano expectantly. He didn't say any thing, though, to get his attention. After a few moments, Romano shifted his weight to the other foot and said quickly, "It wasn't the bullet. It was internal bleeding," Mark took a minute to process it. He was pretty sure he understood it, except, he wasn't sure that he did, fully, "What?" "The bullet didn't do any thing. It came out all right. It was internal bleeding. We all. missed it. I guess," Romano said, a bit slower this time. "Damn." That was all Mark said. He didn't have the energy to get to upset this time. He didn't really feel like it either. He sat there for a minute, checking for the fiftieth time that night that it wasn't a nightmare. Unfortunately, it wasn't. Finally, Mark got up and said, "Where's Elizabeth?" "Recovery Room. Ella and Rachel can't go in for three days," Romano warned. Mark knew that, but he was hoping he could get around that. Romano saw the doubt in Mark's eyes and said, "Babies and kids carry tons of germs. More than adults. It's not safe. If Elizabeth gets so much as the sniffles." Romano didn't know how to finish. "Fine." Mark walked out. He made his way to the lounge. Some of the staff noticed, and followed with their eyes. As soon as Mark disappeared into the lounge, they all exchanged glances. In the lounge, Mark found Rachel sitting on one of the couches, finger combing her hair. Rachel hardly looked up at Mark when he came in. Mark hesitated, "I hardly know her," he thought, "What if she doesn't care? What if she just came because Jenn told her?" Mark quickly pushed aside those thoughts when he saw a tear roll down Rachel's cheek. Mark walked over and sat next to his daughter, and let her lean on him, "You have no idea how horrible I feel," she said, her voice cracking. Mark wasn't sure how to respond to that. He didn't know what Rachel was talking about. He was about to say something, when Rachel kept going. "I was such a brat to her at Thanksgiving. I never apologized, and I might never get too. All she'll ever remember me as is a ten-year-old brat," Rachel let the tears flow. She buried her face into her dad's chest. Mark was a bit taken back. He had no idea that Rachel would take it so hard. He rocked Rachel a bit and said, "It's okay honey. It's okay. Elizabeth didn't hold it against you. She was that age, too remember, with divorced parents. She knew what it was like. Don't worry, Rach." Rachel tried to dry her eyes. She only succeeded at calming her self down, because a few tears were still escaping her eyes. Mark wanted to go see Elizabeth, but he couldn't leave Rachel like this. Mark knew he had to be a father first. Romano gazed in on the scene through the window. It was almost mesmerizing, Mark cradling a baby in one hand and hugging his other daughter in his other arm. It would have been a heart-warming scene, if it had been happening under different circumstances. "How'd he take it?" Romano jumped a little, startled. He turned to see Kerry behind him. "Oh. Okay I guess," Romano said, "I kind of left out the part about how Elizabeth got internal bleeding, but. I guess I should have told him," "It's hard, I know. It's difficult enough when it's a total stranger, but when it's someone you know. It's heartbreaking," Kerry said, "I'm sure you did the best you could." Romano remembered the other time when someone on the staff was hurt. "Who told the families of that med student, Ms.Knight, and that resident, the one who." Romano didn't know how to finish. Now definitely wasn't the time to be bringing a drug addiction up, but that was the only way he knew Carter. "Carter?" Kerry guessed. "Yeah. Him. Who told the families?" Kerry wracked her mind for a moment and then said, "Peter Benton told Carter's grandmother, and I believe that it was Elizabeth who told Lucy's mother that she had died." Romano fell silent for a minute, "Do you think I should go in and tell him the rest?" he asked. Kerry shook her head, "No. I know Mark, and he can only handle so much emotion at a time. Give him time to get a handle on this, first. Tell him tomorrow. or I could do it, if you want." Kerry offered. "No," Romano shook his head, "I kind of fell like I owe him at least that much, I mean I was the one who missed the internal bleeding," "No, Robert. We all missed it. Half a dozen people down here, and another half dozen up stairs. It wasn't your fault," Kerry pointed out. "Yeah, I guess. I think it might make me more secure about this though," Deb came up behind them, and said, "Four GSWs are coming in," Romano sighed, "Same guy?" Deb just nodded, and said, "We need help, we're short a trauma surgeon and a doctor." "Right. I'll be right there," Kerry said, "and page Benton. We'll probably need him," "No don't. I'll do this. Benton's over his head up there already," Romano said, "He's going out one surgery, changing, and going into the next. He's the only surgeon on hand. We're trying to get the rest of them in, though. So far though, no luck," Romano said, heading for the ambulance bay. Inside the lounge, Rachel had stopped crying and was leaning on her father. Ella had woken up, but thankfully, hadn't made a peep. Mark was getting a bit antsy to go see Elizabeth, but he contained himself for a while. Finally, when he thought Rachel was okay, he said, "Rachel, I'd like to go see Elizabeth. Would you be okay on your own? I'll drop Ella off at daycare on my way upstairs. "Can I go? Please?" Rachel inquired, looking up. Mark sighed. He knew this would be coming, "Rachel, No one but immediate family can see her, and immediate family that is under eighteen can't go in for three days." Rachel's face fell, "Guess I struck out twice then, didn't I?" Mark realized his mistake and quickly corrected himself, "Elizabeth considers you family, honey. You're a second daughter to her. In three days, if everything. works out, you can go see her," "Okay. yeah, I'll be fine. Go ahead." "Are you sure?" Mark double checked. Rachel nodded and said, "Yeah," Mark gave Rachel a quick squeeze, and kissed her on top of her head, and got up. Mark looked around for someone who wasn't doing any thing, which of course there wasn't any one. Mark really didn't want Rachel to be alone. Mark heard a commotion coming from down the hall. Carter was trying to revive a patient with the paddles, but so far without success. The patient was opened up. Mark didn't bother to ask what had happened to the poor man. Somehow he already knew. Finally, a few doctors and nurses began to congregate at the front desk. Mark spied Kerry in the crowd. He stood on the outside of the crowd, waiting for Kerry to finish talking. ". Look, we need more trauma areas prepared. Convert three exam rooms into trauma stations. All of them need to have the basics for traumas. Halea, go upstairs and tell them that we need two more sets of paddles. We only have enough for three traumas, and at the rate this guy is going, we need to expect a lot more," Kerry took a breath going over her mental list of things she needed to get done, "Oh. Randi, call the police station, and ask them how their doing-" "I did five minutes ago. The guy basically shoots and runs. They can't catch someone like that very easily." Randi said. "My guess is that he's changing clothes a lot. You might wanna see if you can get a picture of this guy for the hospital, I mean all things considering. First the foster home, then the social worker, then Dr.Gr-" Frank stopped short, seeing Mark. Kerry saw Mark also, and said, "Right Frank. You see if you can do that. Everyone else just get ready for the next trauma, and get a lot of blood down here, ready," Kerry made her way through the crowd to Mark, "Is everything. are you okay?" "Umm.yeah, but I have need a favor from you. I wouldn't normally ask this of you, but-" Mark stopped short. "Mark? Mark? What is it? Are you okay?" Kerry asked frantically. Mark's eyes were glued to something in the waiting area. Kerry turned, and followed his gaze. Mark was watching a man who had just walked in and was making his way through the hospital toward them. Kerry turned back towards Mark and said, "Mark? Is something wrong?" Mark quickly turned around and walked quickly, back towards the lounge. He was almost there, when a gun went off.