Chapter 19 – Dobby's Duty
December 20th
After a long and tiring journey from Azkaban, they finally arrived at Hogwarts at dusk. Ron and his father (who had accompanied them) had gone straight to the Order of the Phoenix room and Draco had taken Harry straight to their 'apartment'.
Draco glanced over at Harry, who was sitting on one of the sofas. The dark haired boy was still shivering slightly, even with a crackling fire nearby. Draco collected a blanket off their bed and padded silently over to Harry.
Harry jumped, startled as Draco sat beside him and tucked the blanket around them both. He smiled gratefully at his boyfriend as Draco pulled him into his arms. Draco lay back on the sofa and pulled Harry back with him. The dark haired seeker lay with his head on Draco's chest, feeling safe and secure with former Slytherin's arms around him. He closed his eyes and sighed happily.
Draco pressed a kiss on Harry's hair and thanked god that Harry was back home. He was a little concerned that Harry had yet to say anything other than monosyllabic answers but he figured that when Harry was ready, he would talk.
But until then, it couldn't hurt to give him a little encouragement.
"You know I'm here for you, don't you?" Draco said softly. "If ever you want to talk about it or anything at all, I'm here to listen."
The room was silent. Draco sighed quietly as he realised Harry had probably fallen asleep. Which was good. Harry needed the rest. He smoothed Harry's hair back away from his face and kissed the top of his head again.
"I know," Harry whispered finally.
"I thought you were asleep, sweetheart," Draco murmured.
"I can't," Harry choked out. "I don't want to dream. I can't take it anymore."
Draco's arms tightened protectively as he tried to soothe his distraught boyfriend.
"Shhh," Draco said, "Snape left some Dreamless Sleep Potion for you. Do you want some?"
Harry turned his head up so he could see Draco's face. Draco's heart broke again as his eyes swept over Harry's strained features. Tense lines surrounded Harry's eyes where once there had been none and his eyes held a pain that Draco hoped would ease with time and a lot of tender loving care.
"Okay," Harry agreed. He watched solemnly as Draco reached one arm back to grasp one of several small potion bottles that were sitting on the little end table beside the sofa. Draco's eyes never left his and Harry reached up to press a chaste kiss on Draco's lips.
Draco froze just as his fingers surrounded the bottle of potion. It was the first time since Harry had been in Azkaban that he had instigated any form of affection. Usually it was Draco who kissed Harry or put his arms around Harry. Draco's lips curved up in a smile. Harry managed a small smile in response and Draco's arm returned to his side, potion bottle in hand.
Harry took the potion and downed it quickly. He had not had a decent nights sleep since he had been arrested and he knew he wouldn't feel like himself until he'd had several hours of dreamless sleep and a hot shower, in that order. Only then could he face remembering his ordeal.
Draco pulled the blanket tighter around them both and wrapped his arms around Harry again as his boyfriend settled himself back down on his chest. Draco continually ran his hands through Harry's hair and murmured comforting soothing noises until Harry fell asleep.
He was determined that Harry would feel only love and warmth and security during his recovery. Even after that, if he could help it, but real life had an annoying habit of interfering.
Eventually Draco drifted off to sleep too.
*
December 21st
Many hours later, Harry slowly awoke. He lay with his eyes still closed, just savouring the feeling of a good sleep. He stretched out languidly. He opened startled eyes as he hit something with his arms and legs. Oh right, he thought, the sofa.
Harry pushed himself up so he was sitting on the sofa as he suddenly realised he was alone. His anxious gaze swept around the room but he couldn't see Draco.
"Draco?" Harry called in a wobbly voice. Where was he? Harry started to panic ever so slightly. His breathing quickened and his eyes widened as the reality set in. He was alone. Draco really wasn't there.
His frantic gaze once again scanned the room, as if expecting Draco to appear from behind the furniture or something. His eyes flicked back to the door at the back of the room. Bedroom, he remembered suddenly.
Harry got to his feet and wandered over to the door and opened it. He peered in but that room too was empty. He was about to close the door again when he noticed the sound. It was coming from a door over by the bed. Bathroom, Harry reminded himself. He could hear water running in the shower.
Harry crossed the bedroom and quietly opened the door. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him. Draco had his back to him and hadn't noticed anyone entering the bathroom. Harry heaved a sigh of relief and sagged against the door as he saw the blonde head in the shower.
He could hear Draco humming a song he recognised as being a muggle tune. Where did he pick that up? Harry wondered. Dudley had taken to playing it loudly last summer much to the annoyance of his father. That was one memory that Harry had liked to replay in his head because his uncle had actually been angry at Dudley rather than himself.
Harry stood leaning against the door just drinking in the sight of Draco showering. Actually it wouldn't have mattered what the blonde boy was doing. Harry was just thankful that he was able to watch him at all.
Draco lathered up the shampoo on his hair as he hummed softly to himself. He had fallen in love with the song when he had been wandering around London last week. He'd ended up in a store called the Virgin Megastore. He'd been intrigued by the name and had gone in to see exactly what sort of virgin's they had for sale. It had turned out that the store sold different types of muggle entertainment such as music, videos and games.
The song was being played on the instore radio station and Draco had been moved to ask a salesperson the name of the song. She'd handed him a slim plastic box, which she'd told him was the CD with the song on it. Draco had bought it on impulse but still hadn't worked out how to get the music out of it. He knew Hermione would be able to help him with it when he saw her next.
Draco moved his head under the spray of water to rinse the shampoo out of his hair. Then he reached for the conditioner and ran his fingers through his fine hair to spread it all over his head. He washed the excess conditioner from his hands and reached for the soap. This was his secret to soft, shiny hair – he would leave the conditioner to soak in for as long as possible before rinsing it out. Draco rubbed the soap over his body and started singing the words of the song. He didn't really know the words all that well, but there was one bit that was his favourite and that was really the only bit he knew well. He hoped to learn the rest as soon as Hermione told him how he could listen to his CD.
"It's the little things that only I know, those are the things that make you mine," Draco sang softly, not wanting to wake Harry up. "And it's like flying without wings, because you're my special thing, I'm flying without wings."
Finally, Draco thrust his head under the water one last time to rid his hair of the conditioner. He ran his hands repeatedly through his hair until it felt right to him. Draco moved his head out from under the spray and wiped the water from his face. He opened his eyes and almost had a heart attack as he saw Harry standing calmly by the door, staring at him.
"Harry. Are you okay? Is everything alright?" Draco asked, turning off the water and stepping out of the shower. He grabbed a fluffy yellow towel and started rubbing himself dry as he watched Harry worriedly.
"Everything's fine," Harry replied, watching Draco's every move. He followed Draco into the bedroom and watched as Draco opened a drawer, pulled out a pair of gold satin boxers and pulled them on. Next he opened the wardrobe and took a pair of black slacks from a coat hanger and slipped them on over his boxers. A silvery grey shirt was put on but left unbuttoned for now. Finally Draco retrieved a pair of black socks from his underwear drawer and sat down on the bed to pull them on.
"Are you going to put on your robes?" Harry asked.
"No. There's no point. It's just us in here. This is more comfortable. I'm not going to wear shoes either," Draco explained, smiling up at Harry. Harry nodded slowly and looked thoughtful. Draco wished he could know what Harry was thinking when he went silent like that. It was disconcerting to find that he no longer knew what was going through Harry's mind.
"Why don't you take a shower?" Draco suggested, glancing over at Harry.
Harry looked apprehensive and eager all at once at this suggestion.
"What?" Draco asked, confused by this reaction.
"Well, would you mind…staying in the bathroom while I take a shower?" Harry asked so softly Draco wasn't sure if he had heard him correctly.
"You want me to stay in the bathroom with you? Is that what you said?" Draco asked.
"Yeah. I …uh… I just need you to be near me," Harry tried to explain but the words didn't seem to want to come.
Draco nodded as he began to understand. After being forcefully separated for five days, Harry needed the reassurance of his presence.
Harry stepped back into the bathroom with Draco not far behind him. Draco pulled the door closed as Harry started to undress. It felt good just to rid himself of the dirty robes he'd been wearing for the past five days, Harry thought. He turned on the water and when it was the right temperature he stepped beneath the hot spray with a groan of pleasure.
Oh god, it was better than he'd even imagined. Harry stood still under the steady stream of water for a few minutes, just enjoying the sensation. Then he reached for the soap and started to lather it all over his body. He had felt so dirty before but now he was starting to feel clean again. He scrubbed all over until he felt that he had finally gotten rid of the filth of that hell hole.
Harry reached for the shampoo and washed his hair vigorously. He rinsed it out and then conditioned it, not waiting as long as Draco did though before he rinsed that off too. Then he stood under the water with his eyes closed, an expression on deep satisfaction on his face.
Draco watched all this while he cleaned his teeth. He smiled as Harry groaned when he entered the shower. Hopefully Harry was starting to feel human again, with a good sleep, a hot shower and soon, some food in his stomach.
Draco tapped on the glass door to the shower. Harry's startled eyes opened and he looked questioningly at Draco.
"I'm just going into the bedroom for one minute to order some food. What do you feel like?" Draco asked him.
Harry looked panicked for a moment. "Do you have to go?"
"Unless you want Dobby to come in here, I have to go out, but it will only be for a minute," Draco said reassuringly.
"Okay," Harry agreed dubiously. "I'd like …um… I really don't care. Anything."
Draco nodded and left the bathroom. He walked quickly in the living room and rang a small bell which was on a table by the front door. Dobby appeared before him almost instantly.
"Master Draco," breathed Dobby in an awed tone of voice. "You is back. Is Harry Potter feeling better?"
"He is and he would like some food. Dobby, do you know what Harry's favourite foods are?" Draco asked.
"Oh, yes," Dobby replied, nodding enthusiastically. "I is knowing all of Harry Potter's favourite foods."
"Good. Could you bring us some of each of them?" Draco asked. "We'll sit over there."
Draco gestured towards the small round table with two comfortable armchairs beside it, the same table and chairs that Harry had said his goodbye's at during Halloween.
"Yes sir, Master Draco. Dobby will be back soon," Dobby was nodding again as he disappeared with a pop.
Draco hurried back into the bathroom and found Harry towelling himself dry with a fluffy red towel.
"Food will be here soon," Draco said, watching a naked Harry walk past him into the bedroom.
Draco sat down on the bed and watched as Harry pulled on a pair of red boxer shorts and matching red socks. His boyfriend then slipped on a pair of dark red jeans. Finally he added a black long sleeve t-shirt.
Harry stood by the door to the living room and held out his hand to Draco. The blonde boy reached out and grasped Harry's hand. They walked out into the living room holding hands to find the small table in the corner of the room had been enlarged and now held enough food to feed a small army and a very proud Dobby standing nearby.
"Oh Harry Potter, Dobby is being glad to see you back, sir," Dobby gushed but he did not rush over to Harry as he normally did.
Draco glanced at Harry and although he looked mildly amused, he didn't look like he was going to say anything any time soon.
"Thank you so much for this, Dobby. We both really appreciate it but would you mind if we had some time alone?" Draco asked cautiously, hoping he'd been polite enough so that Dobby would not feel he had to hurt himself and would actually leave them alone.
Dobby's eyes grew wide as he looked from Harry to Draco. "Of course, I is going, Master Draco. You be having lots to talk about. I come back later for dishes, when you ring the bell."
Dobby disappeared before either of them could reply, not that Draco thought Harry would have replied anyway.
Harry sank into one of the chairs as Draco sat in the other one opposite him. Harry sniffed, enjoying the delicious aroma while he decided what to attack first. They both ate in silence for a while and then Draco stopped and sat back and watched Harry eat.
Harry's current behaviour reminded him of how he ate at the start of the school year. Draco knew that the Dursley's never really fed him enough and that's why he always ate so much at the start of the school year until he got used to being able to eat as much as he liked and his appetite settled down to normal. Draco's blood boiled as he thought of what he'd do to those muggles when he was a fully qualified wizard.
Finally Harry wiped his mouth with his napkin and sat back in his chair, sated at last.
Draco grinned at him. "Feeling more like a human now?"
Harry grinned back. "Oh yes. Much more like a human. Let's go sit by the fire."
Draco agreed, inwardly celebrating Harry's increased vocabulary.
The two of them settled on the sofa side by side, both staring into the flames.
"It was hell," Harry said finally.
Draco glanced at him in surprise. He didn't really think Harry would ever be able to talk about it. But now that he had started, Draco didn't want him to stop. He scooted over closer to Harry and wrapped his arm around Harry's shoulders.
"At first all I could hear was my mother's voice screaming and Voldemort laughing and all I could see was a bright green light. Over and over and over again the same thing was replayed until I felt like I was going to go insane," Harry said, his voice breaking with emotion.
Draco's arm tightened around Harry and he felt his chest tighten as he imagined what Harry had been through.
"Then I started to try to manipulate what I was seeing. All my good memories were gone but I didn't have very many of them to begin with so I was left with a lot to choose from," Harry's voice took on a bitter edge.
"But even that was too difficult sometimes. It was only when I was feeling really strong that I was able to force a memory to stay. Sometimes I'd remember you, from before we got together. Those memories weren't pleasant but at least it was you," Harry said, reaching out to clutch Draco's free hand.
"I remembered the Dursley's, or Potions class, or that day we went to the cemetery. But the worst time, was after you visited me. You did visit me, didn't you? I didn't imagine it, did I?" Harry asked, afraid that he had indeed been hallucinating.
"You didn't imagine it. I was there," Draco admitted but he was horrified to hear that his visit had caused Harry pain.
"After you left, I couldn't work out if you had been real or just my imagination but I felt devastated either way," Harry said quietly.
Draco was confused by this and it must have shown on his face because Harry glanced at him and then started to explain.
"If it was just my imagination, then it meant that you hadn't visited. I know it's difficult to visit Azkaban but if you hadn't been there, well, I just felt…unloved I guess," Harry confessed.
"Oh Harry, don't ever doubt that I love you. Even if the whole world is telling you otherwise, don't ever doubt my love for you. I would lay down my life for you," Draco declared before hugging Harry tightly.
Harry clung to Draco and squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm sorry. I knew it was wrong but the Dementors ensured that the thought stayed there, tormenting me."
Draco pulled back slightly from Harry and nodded for him to continue talking.
"And if you had been real, I was devastated because it meant that you had been there but you left me there," Harry held up a hand to stop any protest Draco might have uttered. "I know that you had no choice in the matter and I knew it then too but that didn't stop your visit from haunting me every day after that."
"It haunted me too," Draco said softly. "Everywhere I went, I heard you pleading with me, calling my name. I felt like I had let you down and I felt so helpless. I'd done everything I could to get you out of there and I had to just sit around and wait for those bastards at the MLE to make up their minds about the trial."
"I know it's only mid-morning," Harry said with an apologetic expression. "But I'm really tired. Would you mind if I went to bed for a few hours?"
"Of course not," Draco replied. "Do you want some company?"
Harry looked embarrassed. "Yeah. That is if you don't have anything else to do."
"The only thing on my To Do list this week is to spoil you, Mr Potter," Draco drawled. He stood up and pulled Harry up beside him. "Do you want a potion?"
Harry nodded and Draco scooped up two of the bottles on the table. He rang the bell for Dobby and instructed the elf to clean up the mess from their meal and the two Gryffindors went into the bedroom.
Both boys changed into their favourite pyjamas – Harry in scarlet silk and Draco in gold silk. They both snuggled under the covers of the bed and Draco handed Harry a bottle of Dreamless Sleep Potion before uncapping his own.
"You're taking the potion too?" Harry questioned him.
Draco smiled sheepishly. "I know your week was far worse, but mine wasn't much better."
Harry smiled sympathetically. They clinked their bottles together and downed them simultaneously.
"Sleep well, sweetheart," Draco said, kissing Harry lightly before snuggling up beside him.
Harry pulled the blonde closer and kissed his cheek. "Sleep well, dragon."
Later that evening, Harry slowly awoke. He felt so warm, nestled in the blankets of the bed and in Draco's arms. He didn't really want to wake up yet. He gradually opened his eyes and Draco's sleeping face came into focus. Harry smiled unconsciously and reached out to gently brush his fingers along Draco's cheekbone.
He is so beautiful, Harry thought lovingly. He looks like an angel when he's asleep. I'm so lucky to have him. Harry thought back to the start of the school year, when he and Draco were still enemies. Although he'd been in love with Draco then, he'd certainly never thought that Draco might feel the same way about him. It was funny the way life turned out sometimes. Both of them had been in love with the other for at least a year before they'd actually admitted it to each other. So much wasted time, mused Harry wistfully. But we have our whole lives together now.
Damn, I have to pee, Harry thought. He slid carefully out of Draco's arms and climbed out of bed.
Draco rolled over in his sleep and sighed.
Harry came back out of the bathroom and smiled at Draco's back. Harry just stood there for a moment, contemplating his boyfriend's determination to indulge him and Harry decided to do something nice in return. After all, Draco would not have had a very pleasant week last week. Harry knew that if Draco were the one tossed in jail, he would be shattered.
Harry walked into the living room and rang the bell for Dobby. The house elf appeared before him. Harry was surprised to note that the small elf seemed to be nervous which wasn't like Dobby at all.
"Harry Potter," Dobby said respectfully. "What can Dobby do for you?"
"Draco is sleeping but he'll be awake soon. We'd like some dinner please. Whatever the school is having will be fine," Harry said, his eyes narrowing as he tried to figure out what was bothering Dobby.
"Yes sir, Harry Potter, sir," Dobby said quickly, nodding his head.
"What's going on?" a sleepy voice said from the doorway to the bedroom.
Harry didn't need to turn around to know that Draco was standing there, stretching. Harry's eyes narrowed as he watched Dobby visibly relaxed when Draco entered the room. He's afraid to be in the same room as me, Harry was stunned to realise. Surely he doesn't believe I'd curse him.
"Harry?" Draco asked, coming to stand beside him.
"Oh…uh…I was just asking Dobby to bring us some dinner," Harry explained.
"Oh, thank you Dobby, that would be great," Draco said, smiling at the elf. Dobby smiled gratefully back at him and disappeared.
Harry sank down onto one of the armchairs looking traumatised. "Oh my god."
"What's wrong?" Draco asked, kneeling down before Harry, staring up at him.
"Dobby is afraid of me," Harry said despairingly.
"Oh no, I'm sure he's not," Draco tried to protest but Harry cut him off.
"I saw it Draco. I saw it in his eyes," Harry argued. "I'm sure everyone knows by now that I was in Azkaban because I hurt you. They'll all be staring at me and some will be afraid of me. God, even Hermione was afraid of me after it actually happened. I could see her thinking, if I could do that to you, then what on earth could I do to someone I don't feel so strongly for?"
"Sweetheart, you can't think about that now," Draco said firmly. "Maybe they will be afraid and maybe they won't but you can't let that get to you now. You need to focus on you."
Harry took a few deep breaths. Draco was right. Besides, there was nothing he could do about it anyway.
Draco stood up and pulled Harry up into a hug. Draco wound his arms around Harry's neck and held him closely. Draco watched over Harry's shoulder as Dobby reappeared with trays of food. The elf looked tense for a moment before he noticed Draco's blonde hair and relaxed. Draco was shocked to realise that Harry was right. Dobby was afraid of him.
Dobby set the food on the table and turned to stare up at Harry's back. Draco smiled down at him and tried to reassure him non-verbally. Dobby's expression softened as he saw Draco comforting Harry. Harry didn't seem so bad now and if Draco could still be with him, then he couldn't be that dangerous…could he?
TBC
A.N. The song Draco sings is 'Flying Without Wings' by Westlife. I love that song. The next chapter should be out by the weekend. I'm hoping to finish this story completely pretty soon.
Recommendation – I just read a fantastic fic called Spell Master. The URL is below. If you are pro-Slytherin and you like vindictive!Draco, then this fic is for you. Draco rocks in this fic. Apparently it will be D/H Slash but not just yet. Go read it now!
http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=825759