Just One Week… Part One
Disclaimer: Though both authors are supremely ingenious, neither came up with the premises for this show. But the overwhelming creativity has overflowed and the result is what you have before you.
Authors' Note: This is written by two best friends, a blonde and a brunette… quite ironic, but we won't get into any jokes.
Another Authors' Note: This fan fic is written as a script. A script is vastly different than a novel, or anything that reads like a book. Basically, this is them talking, you make the voices in your head (or out loud, but we're not gonna go there) and you imagine what the setting looks like in your mind. The actions that we couldn't do without are in italics. Enjoy, and really- making the voices helps.
PART ONE:
Lorelai: I don't know how to say goodbye.
Rory: Mom, it's only a week. Calm yourself.
Lorelai: But you're all I have… If you die, there's no proof that I was ever actually successful at anything.
Rory: Mom, it's just a harmless week. You'll survive. You'll drink coffee. You'll bicker with Luke. He'll give you more coffee. You'll avoid your parents. It'll be a typical week for you, and I'll call everyday…
Lorelai: Everyday? You promise?
Rory: Everyday.
Lorelai: Without fail?
Rory: Without fail.
Lorelai: Swear?
Rory: The only thing that would prevent me from calling you everyday would be if Lane and I were abducted by aliens.
Lorelai: You wouldn't call me and tell me what they really look like?
Rory: Well, the long distance charges would destroy any hope you might have of paying off your parents and therefore getting them off your back.
Lorelai: Everyday?
Rory: Mom, I'm leaving now.
Lorelai: Now?
Rory: No, I said now so that you could mentally prepare yourself for when I leave in three months. Yes, Mom, now!
Lorelai: Are you sure you wanna go?
Rory: Well, I've been having doubts…
Lorelai: Really ?!?!
Rory: No, Mom, and I really am leaving now. The phone number for the hotel is taped to the fridge, and I left my cell number and Lane's, in case you forget…
Lorelai: An elephant never forgets.
Rory: OK, in case you have a momentary lapse… or something. All the information you need is there. On the fridge. And I gave Luke a copy of all the numbers for when you lose the paper that's on the fridge.
Lorelai: I don't lose things!
Rory: Mom, where are your keys?
Lorelai feels her pockets.
Lorelai: OK, so keys are the only thing I ever lose.
Rory: Besides your mind.
Lorelai: What?
Rory: I said Goodbye, Mother. I'll miss you.
Lorelai: Wait! I love you.
Rory: I love you too Mom!
Lorelai: Wait! Here's some extra cash.
Rory: Thank you Mom. Goodbye.
Lorelai: Wait! Don't go. Umm… I got concert tickets!
Rory: Which group?
Lorelai: Really!?
Rory: No!! And goodbye for the last time.
Lorelai: OK, well, um… I really do love you, hon. Have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. No wait- don't do anything I would do.
Rory: Mom, I am you. Now go see Luke and cry into your coffee cup.
Lorelai: I don't cry into coffee cups. It gives the coffee a weird salty taste.
Rory: (kisses Lorelai's cheek) Bye. I love you.
Lorelai: I love you too, babe.
Rory gets into her Dean car and drives towards Lane's house.
Lorelai: Have fun!! But not too much… OK, so she's off. Gone. What now?
Everyday for eighteen freakin' years, and now, poof, she's gone. I need coffee.
Rory pulls up in front of Lane's house and honks. Lane comes running out to the car and throws her stuff in the backseat.
Lane: Drive! Drive, girl, I said drive!! Now!!
Rory: Ok, ok.
Lane: Faster! Come on girl, gas is on the right!
Rory: Where's your Mom?
Lane: I told her that the neighbours offer up sacrifices every Saturday morning, and that I think they're using priceless antiques as kindling.
Rory: Your neighbours offer up sacrifices?
Lane: Well, Mom's there now, isn't she?
Rory: Who exactly do they sacrifice to?
Lane: What?
Rory: Did you have breakfast?
Lane: Mom made biscuits again.
Rory: I'll take that as a no.
Lane: To Luke's?
Rory: To Luke's!
Rory and Lane enter Luke's Diner and see Lorelai arguing with Luke over the amount of coffee he poured into her cup.
Lorelai: But see, the mug is only half full.
Luke: Is there coffee in it?
Lorelai: Yes, but the point of having a large coffee mug is to be able to have large amounts of coffee in it.
Luke: Hey, I gave you coffee. You never specified the amount.
Lorelai: Specified… big word for you, eh. Monosyllabic Man…
Luke: What did you just say?
Lorelai: Nothing.
Luke: Did you just say I have mono?
Lorelai: The kissing disease. Luke, is there someone I don't know about?
Luke: Lorelai… do you want coffee or not?
Lorelai: Sure, fill me up.
Luke: You have coffee in your cup already.
Lorelai: Yes, yes, but not enough coffee. The coffee in my mug is getting lonely. It misses it's little coffee friends from the big friendly coffee pot. They're calling. (in a squeaky voice) 'Little coffee friends… I miss you. Come to me. Escape the scary coffee Nazi.' I always hated Seinfeld.
Luke: Oh ya, that soup Nazi guys was really annoyi-- how long is Rory gone for?
Rory: I won't be going anywhere until I get coffee.
Luke: Not you too.
Lorelai: Poor girl, didn't stand a chance.
Luke pours two coffees and hands them to Lane and Rory.
Lorelai: Not fair! Theirs are full!! Hey, how was the trip?
Rory and Lane are already outside the door, and are starting to run.
Lorelai: Well fine then. She never said goodbye.
Luke: What about the commentary I got on your tragic separation this morning? I happen to recall a lengthly and exhausting tale that you finished just before you claimed that I don't fill coffee cups properly.
Lorelai: Speaking of which… and hey, are you saying I'm boring?
Luke: I never said that... um…
Lorelai: Because you said exhausting, which implies boringness.
Luke puts the coffee pot down in front of Lorelai and walks away.
Lorelai: Hey!! Hey…
Disclaimer: Though both authors are supremely ingenious, neither came up with the premises for this show. But the overwhelming creativity has overflowed and the result is what you have before you.
Authors' Note: This is written by two best friends, a blonde and a brunette… quite ironic, but we won't get into any jokes.
Another Authors' Note: This fan fic is written as a script. A script is vastly different than a novel, or anything that reads like a book. Basically, this is them talking, you make the voices in your head (or out loud, but we're not gonna go there) and you imagine what the setting looks like in your mind. The actions that we couldn't do without are in italics. Enjoy, and really- making the voices helps.
PART ONE:
Lorelai: I don't know how to say goodbye.
Rory: Mom, it's only a week. Calm yourself.
Lorelai: But you're all I have… If you die, there's no proof that I was ever actually successful at anything.
Rory: Mom, it's just a harmless week. You'll survive. You'll drink coffee. You'll bicker with Luke. He'll give you more coffee. You'll avoid your parents. It'll be a typical week for you, and I'll call everyday…
Lorelai: Everyday? You promise?
Rory: Everyday.
Lorelai: Without fail?
Rory: Without fail.
Lorelai: Swear?
Rory: The only thing that would prevent me from calling you everyday would be if Lane and I were abducted by aliens.
Lorelai: You wouldn't call me and tell me what they really look like?
Rory: Well, the long distance charges would destroy any hope you might have of paying off your parents and therefore getting them off your back.
Lorelai: Everyday?
Rory: Mom, I'm leaving now.
Lorelai: Now?
Rory: No, I said now so that you could mentally prepare yourself for when I leave in three months. Yes, Mom, now!
Lorelai: Are you sure you wanna go?
Rory: Well, I've been having doubts…
Lorelai: Really ?!?!
Rory: No, Mom, and I really am leaving now. The phone number for the hotel is taped to the fridge, and I left my cell number and Lane's, in case you forget…
Lorelai: An elephant never forgets.
Rory: OK, in case you have a momentary lapse… or something. All the information you need is there. On the fridge. And I gave Luke a copy of all the numbers for when you lose the paper that's on the fridge.
Lorelai: I don't lose things!
Rory: Mom, where are your keys?
Lorelai feels her pockets.
Lorelai: OK, so keys are the only thing I ever lose.
Rory: Besides your mind.
Lorelai: What?
Rory: I said Goodbye, Mother. I'll miss you.
Lorelai: Wait! I love you.
Rory: I love you too Mom!
Lorelai: Wait! Here's some extra cash.
Rory: Thank you Mom. Goodbye.
Lorelai: Wait! Don't go. Umm… I got concert tickets!
Rory: Which group?
Lorelai: Really!?
Rory: No!! And goodbye for the last time.
Lorelai: OK, well, um… I really do love you, hon. Have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. No wait- don't do anything I would do.
Rory: Mom, I am you. Now go see Luke and cry into your coffee cup.
Lorelai: I don't cry into coffee cups. It gives the coffee a weird salty taste.
Rory: (kisses Lorelai's cheek) Bye. I love you.
Lorelai: I love you too, babe.
Rory gets into her Dean car and drives towards Lane's house.
Lorelai: Have fun!! But not too much… OK, so she's off. Gone. What now?
Everyday for eighteen freakin' years, and now, poof, she's gone. I need coffee.
Rory pulls up in front of Lane's house and honks. Lane comes running out to the car and throws her stuff in the backseat.
Lane: Drive! Drive, girl, I said drive!! Now!!
Rory: Ok, ok.
Lane: Faster! Come on girl, gas is on the right!
Rory: Where's your Mom?
Lane: I told her that the neighbours offer up sacrifices every Saturday morning, and that I think they're using priceless antiques as kindling.
Rory: Your neighbours offer up sacrifices?
Lane: Well, Mom's there now, isn't she?
Rory: Who exactly do they sacrifice to?
Lane: What?
Rory: Did you have breakfast?
Lane: Mom made biscuits again.
Rory: I'll take that as a no.
Lane: To Luke's?
Rory: To Luke's!
Rory and Lane enter Luke's Diner and see Lorelai arguing with Luke over the amount of coffee he poured into her cup.
Lorelai: But see, the mug is only half full.
Luke: Is there coffee in it?
Lorelai: Yes, but the point of having a large coffee mug is to be able to have large amounts of coffee in it.
Luke: Hey, I gave you coffee. You never specified the amount.
Lorelai: Specified… big word for you, eh. Monosyllabic Man…
Luke: What did you just say?
Lorelai: Nothing.
Luke: Did you just say I have mono?
Lorelai: The kissing disease. Luke, is there someone I don't know about?
Luke: Lorelai… do you want coffee or not?
Lorelai: Sure, fill me up.
Luke: You have coffee in your cup already.
Lorelai: Yes, yes, but not enough coffee. The coffee in my mug is getting lonely. It misses it's little coffee friends from the big friendly coffee pot. They're calling. (in a squeaky voice) 'Little coffee friends… I miss you. Come to me. Escape the scary coffee Nazi.' I always hated Seinfeld.
Luke: Oh ya, that soup Nazi guys was really annoyi-- how long is Rory gone for?
Rory: I won't be going anywhere until I get coffee.
Luke: Not you too.
Lorelai: Poor girl, didn't stand a chance.
Luke pours two coffees and hands them to Lane and Rory.
Lorelai: Not fair! Theirs are full!! Hey, how was the trip?
Rory and Lane are already outside the door, and are starting to run.
Lorelai: Well fine then. She never said goodbye.
Luke: What about the commentary I got on your tragic separation this morning? I happen to recall a lengthly and exhausting tale that you finished just before you claimed that I don't fill coffee cups properly.
Lorelai: Speaking of which… and hey, are you saying I'm boring?
Luke: I never said that... um…
Lorelai: Because you said exhausting, which implies boringness.
Luke puts the coffee pot down in front of Lorelai and walks away.
Lorelai: Hey!! Hey…