AN: For the Wild Men I used ancient Celtic names as seen on Behind the Name. The Senones were a Celtic tribe in (I think) Britain and I borrowed the name.
Chapter 18: Many Meetings
Before we even got back into the saddle, Gander began to bark at something to the northwest where the wind came from. There was no growling, so I wasn't particularly concerned, but still squinted at the horizon.
Warily Boromir loosened his sword in the scabbard.
"What's that on the horizon?" I asked upon spotting two black, four legged blurs in the distance.
Before Boromir could reply Gander ran off in that direction, still barking like a mad thing. "Gander! Come back!" I shouted after him, but that did nothing.
"Aren't those your aunt's dogs?" Boromir asked, pointing in that direction.
Not quite close enough to know for sure, the two strange things encountered Gander. There was no fight and my shoulders loosened at the realization, then I grinned when I heard the excited yips. "Yeah, that's them," I confirmed. "Come on, we're less than an hour away!"
By now it was a matter of routine to get into the saddle behind Boromir, only this time I watched over his shoulder rather than getting lost in the scenery. The dogs were most of the way up a low incline and when we got closer, I knew for a fact that it was Freckles and Speckles wrestling with Gander.
The group on the other side of the hill was larger than I expected; my family was there and the grooms to be, plus I identified Eomer, Stithulf's friend Frelaf, and- what on Middle Earth were a group of Wild Men doing here? They all stood tensely with weapons in hand until Theodred started laughing. "It's Boromir!" he shouted, "How did you escape, my friend?"
Even over the noise of Blitzen's hooves and the dogs playing, I could hear Electra's groan of disappointment. "He totally seduced Cass into it," she declared.
Boromir thankfully muffled his laughter, but I could feel his shoulders shake from it.
"Do you really think Cass would let that get in the way of what needed doing?" Liam asked our youngest sister skeptically.
"Then how did he get out?" Electra returned with a wave at said man.
"I dunno, let's ask," Aunt Libby put in. By now we were close enough that I could see her smirk.
Unusually, Boromir twisted to get out of the saddle first. That left me sitting on Blitzen's back to smile sheepishly in the face of open mouths and bulging eyes. Liam's eyebrows flew up his face and Aunt Libby looked like she couldn't quite believe this. "He sneaked out fair and square," I told them, ignoring the sudden squeals from my sisters.
"Then what are you doing here?" Anahera asked incredulously. Her dark eyes went from me to Boromir and back, gears turning at a rapid pace behind them.
At this point it would be rude to stay seated when everyone else was standing, so I swung my leg over to dismount- only to freeze up when a pair of large, warm hands seized me around the waist. I was lifted off the stirrup and set down on the ground gently to face my disbelieving family. Over my shoulder I gave Boromir a cheesy, nervous smile.
He half-smiled, half-grimaced down at me. The quirk of his eyebrow said, "Last chance to change our minds."
I nodded.
"So, what happened?" Andy asked expectantly, lips curling into a smirk.
Faux casually I stretched and cracked my knuckles. "He sneaked out but I wanted the last word, and he thought I was going to make a fuss so he tossed me onto the horse like a sack of potatoes and rode off," I confessed, face heating up.
If Madhav and Electra's faces were anything to go by, I was never going to live this down.
Aunt Libby downright cackled.
Theodred had another thought, eyes lingering on my neck. "How long have you been riding?" he questioned.
It seemed like forever, considering how little sleep I was running on. Now that our aim was accomplished I felt ready to drop.
"Three days," Boromir answered before I could, "Why?"
Something serious was going on, considering the thoughtful expression suddenly on Theodred's face. And the surprised looks that Stithulf and Frelaf exchanged in the background.
But Mackey, smart woman that she was, had already put the pieces together. "You took a woman from her home and rode three days without being caught. And from the look of it, you had a hell of a good time." She waggled her eyebrows playfully.
The breath caught in my throat. Oh no.
"The old tradition is that after the escape, the woman in question is bedded so that there's no denying the relationship," Theodred added carefully, "In case of a child."
At least we didn't have to worry about that part. Although the implications were making my stomach turn.
"After the consummation, the couple are considered married," Theodred finished and with a wry smile said, "Congratulations, although I can only imagine how high this bride-price will be."
When I looked over my shoulder, Boromir's face was white as death. "Sorry, what?" he spluttered.
"I think he was saying that as far as the Rohirrim are concerned, we're married," I told him with a levity I really didn't feel.
Married? Me? This must be the worst cosmic joke since Mum.
Boromir shot me a look- he knew what was happening, he just prayed he heard wrong.
"Where should we start, the cows or the gold?" Aunt Libby said dryly, "Or should we wait until after Denethor rescinds her ban from Minas Tirith?"
Desperate to turn the topic elsewhere, I waved at the headman of the Wild Men, who with several of his fellows had been watching suspiciously. "What are you all doing here?" I asked, suddenly afraid that something bad had happened, "Is Fedemid alright? Is the baby alright?"
The headman smiled, though he never quite lost the suspicious curiosity in his eyes. "Fedemid is well, baby is well," he answered.
"They thought we were actually being kidnapped," Dezzie said happily where she leaned on her fiance.
Oh. Considering their past with the Rohirrim, I was surprised to not see blood.
Boromir and I were invited into the conversation and we sat on the ground between Anahera and Eomer, listening intently to the headman Nechtan as he and Theodred haltingly discussed the relationship between their peoples. Language barriers made it difficult and several times each had to ask their friends for the word they meant in common speech. Neither really trusted the other, but seeing them even sitting together without violence likely qualified as a miracle.
While all that went on, Electra and I had a quick conversation with our faces. Her intent look at Boromir then a raised eyebrow at me was answered with a tiny shrug. She waggled her eyebrows ridiculously, and I gave her a flat look followed by a wink.
The dogs then started barking up a storm and the many horses became nervous, scuffing the ground with their hooves. A few unsettled neighs drew the Rohirrim's attention and they frowned, putting their heads together.
That same croaking screech was back and I swore. "I thought we lost them!" I hissed to Boromir.
"Apparently not," he muttered, glowering.
Our entire party sprang to our feet, and not too soon considering the orcs that approached us from far too close, marching in formation from the north-west. How did no one notice them before?
I swallowed as I realized that I only had my dagger. Shit. Still I pulled it from my belt, the shing! lost under the noise of swords being drawn.
Arrows flew overhead and a few orcs fell dead, a couple clutched their wounds, but they didn't fall out of formation. Dread grew as I realized that these were actual trained warriors. They were larger than the orcs I was used to, upright and muscular while still ugly as sin and wearing shoddy armor. Something didn't feel right about them; even more than with regular orcs.
"Stithulf, get Dezzie out of here!" Aunt Libby barked.
"Do it!" Theodred ordered, "Go to Helm's Deep!" He stood grimly, sword in hand and helmet covering his golden head.
There was noise of crying and urging, and right as I could see the gleaming yellow-green of the orcs' sharp teeth I heard several sets of hooves galloping away. When I glanced over, the twins and Matt were riding with them.
A shield was pushed into my chest so suddenly that I stumbled. "What?" I barely had time to question before the orcs were upon us.
There was no time to think, only to raise the shield, tighten my grip on my dagger, and try to avoid getting gutted. It's been a long time since I needed to fight with just a knife and it showed; my hands were clumsy in the first minutes of stabbing and slashing. I swore as my knife glanced off a piece of armor and I was only saved by my borrowed shield.
At the same time a horn blew loud and clear just feet away. For reasons I couldn't identify I felt my spirits rise as I confronted the enemy.
An image from another life flashed behind my eyes- the head of a halberd, the mallet of a war hammer, a short sword, and the remains of a round shield. Confidence filled me. This was exactly where I was supposed to be.
This was no small band of orcs and we were kept busy, but I managed to fight my way to my remaining siblings where they fought back to back, shields up and blades slicing through flesh as easily as air. An orc was coming at Liam from the side while he swung his mace into one foul head and I snarled as I flew at it. The boss on the center of my shield struck it in the back and then a hit with the edge to its neck sent it tumbling down, unmoving.
"Some day, right?" Electra shouted over the din.
I could only laugh in response. The next orc tried an overhand swing and with the shield I forced its blade to the side, leaving its torso wide open for my dagger.
A gleam of silver caught my eye and I barely danced out of reach before Madhav's war scythe came down right behind me. There was a sick gurgle and an orc that was surely about to behead me collapsed. "Thanks!" I shouted to him and rammed aside an orc coming up behind Eomer.
A scream of pain rose up just yards from me and the moment I finished my current opponent I spun around to see who needed help. It was one of Nechtan's men, clutching at where he had been stabbed in the upper arm. Despite his wound he took the opportunity to stab his attacker back, staggering as the monster fell.
Oh hell no. Nobody here was dying if I could help it. I ducked under an enemy swipe and danced away from it, putting myself between the wounded man and the horde. "Piss off," I ordered an orc that just couldn't seem to take no for an answer.
It sneered at me.
I let out a holler and met it in stinky, bloody, glorious battle.
There must have been over a hundred of these things, and the battle felt like it lasted hours. The injured Wild Man guarded my back and I kept the major threats at bay, dispatching every orc that came at us. Call me nuts but I giggled my way through a good portion of it- shields are meant to be defensive but it was a better offense than my knife could ever be. Deadliest Warrior actually got something right.
A few last orcs were cut down by every weapon at hand and after the final screech died, there was deadly silence.
Automatically I scanned the area for my relatives. Liam, Aunt Libby, and Madhav looked no worse for wear, only weary as they lowered their weapons; Electra's fire-red hair was lopsided in a way that showed just how close to decapitation she had come and she looked pissed. Frelaf was tutting over a cut that Eomer had sustained but didn't look terrible, and Anahera was kicking various corpses to be sure that they were dead. Four Wild Men were gathered in a group, spears bloody and clubs well-used with only cuts and scrapes that I could see.
At the center of it all Theodred, Boromir, and Nechtan stood, all looking like they had never seen such creatures as each other. "You saved my life, Nechtan," Boromir said to the headman with something like awe in his voice.
Nechtan smiled through his black-soaked beard. "You are husband of ally, I must help against orcs," he said, then spat as if the mere name of the creatures tasted bad.
When they shook dirty, bloody hands, I grinned.
"Horse-prince saved me," Nechtan observed thoughtfully, regarding his former enemy.
Theodred finally removed his helmet and shook out his long golden hair. "I too will help anyone who fights orcs, ally of my wife's clan," he answered. Several different emotions crossed his face in a mere moment but the last was determination. He offered a hand.
Suspicious yet hopeful, Nechtan edged forward and took it.
"Now here's something you don't see every day," Aunt Libby mused, watching them shake on their tentative new friendship.
Impressed, Liam whistled lowly.
"Nice shield, by the way," Aunt Libby added mischievously, "I would suggest returning it, but what's his is yours now, isn't it?"
I wanted to hit her with it now. "This isn't going to be permanent, you know," I told her, stomach roiling from the dying adrenaline.
Her eyes went from the quietly speaking men to me and back. "Oh, I don't know about that," she said, a smile unfurling, "Interrupted definitely, but the second that his dad's kicked the bucket he's going to be coming over these mountains asking for you, I guarantee it." She had to be kidding me.
Looking her in the eye, she was deadly serious.
The last thing I wanted was to argue about this of all things, so I simply said, "Until then, I hope divorce is a thing here," and walked away.
"I will not forget this, Nachtan of the Senones. When I come to Edoras I will tell my father of your valor and help, and ask him to meet peacefully with you," Theodred promised.
I didn't hear the response, because that reminded me of the injured man. Upon seeing them in the care of his fellows I changed direction until I was right in front of them, smiling as I asked, "Can I see your wound?"
Perhaps it was because of how I helped Fedemid, but he agreed quickly. There was no rolling his sleeve up far enough so he took off his shirt and yes, there was definitely hunger in Dunland. His ribs poked out from his skin and his shoulders were blunt. I clicked my tongue at the gash that still trickled blood, but at least it was a clean cut.
"What do you need?" Anahera asked, peering over my shoulder.
"Water, soap, sewing supplies, and bandages," I said, examining the area. A bit of fuzz sticking out of the beginning of a scab made my nose wrinkle. "If there's any tweezers, I can see some fibers caught in here," I added quickly.
"I'll see if I can find the horses," she answered and sprinted away.
I felt motion behind me and glanced over my shoulder, only to see Boromir. "You alright?" I asked as I offered his shield back.
It was a relief for him to take it back, no matter how useful it was. "I am uninjured. Are you?" Even before I answered he was scanning me for injury.
"Nah, I'm good. Thanks to that impressive shield you nearly knocked me out with," I exaggerated. I was sorer than I remember being since boot camp, but nothing sharp had managed to touch me.
Boromir looked quite proud and I'll admit I did a little preening.
Thankfully Anahera returned with an entire saddlebag to dig in. "Frelaf said it would be in here," she muttered, balancing it on a raised thigh while she rummaged. "Aha!" she crowed when she found a needle and small bundle of thread.
There was still enough heat to the fire for me to sterilize the needle, though we had to make do with water on the wound itself. In a minor miracle Eomer had a pair of tweezers and Theodred kept a stock of pain-relieving herbs, much better than expected. I sat the injured man down and had him talk about his family to distract him while I dealt with that cut.
I tried not to think about how Boromir watched on, listening curiously. Why was he even still standing there?
At the end of it I tied off the string and bandaged the stitches with clean linen. "You're all set, Iodocus," I told him cheerily, patting his forearm, "Tell your wife and children hello for me."
"Thank you, Galchobhar," he said with a smile, "I will."
That was a name I'd never heard before. "What does that mean? Galchobhar?" I asked.
Iodocus looked at his friends with a frown and they did a little chit-chatting. "Help from far away," he eventually translated.
Flattered, I smiled at him. "Thank you for such a nice name. Take care." Again I patted his forearm and then turned around to raise an eyebrow at Boromir. "Have fun watching?" I teased.
"I always think I know what you're capable of, and then you go and surprise me," Boromir answered thoughtfully.
"Don't worry, I'm not too terribly deep," I assured him, "That's about the extent of me: loud mouth, killing hands, always bandaging somebody up."
Aunt Libby caught up with us then. "The grooms are going ahead, the rest of us are headed home. Which way are you going?" she asked me, dark circles under her eyes.
Quietly Boromir excused himself.
Splitting up didn't seem like a good idea at first. Then I remembered- only Aditi and Stevie were left to defend Tharbad and the civilians. And Stevie was out half an arm. "Just a sec-" I barely got to say before I was interrupted.
"Never mind, you spend all the time you can with your new hubby before the divorce," Aunt Libby told me despite her clear disapproval of said divorce. She gave me a tight smile, hugged me quickly, and wandered to where everyone had gathered who was returning north-west.
There was a hug-fest, as always when parting from the family. Electra teased me about accidentally getting married and Liam told me to not murder Boromir in his sleep, like I would ever do that.
"Every time you come across him there's some kind of escalation," Madhav reasoned, laughing as I swatted at him, "It only makes sense!"
In the same motion as the up-yours, I gave him the finger. "Ride safe," I told him fondly while I held his horse for him to mount.
"You too." Then he and the others were off, cantering up and way toward home.
I waved until they, Freckles, and Speckles were gone over the hills.
While Theodred and Boromir were saying goodbye to Nachtan and his people, I tried to gather my courage. The battle was over but the really hard part was to come.
Gander licked my hand comfortingly. Looking down, I realized that his fur was matted with black blood. "You need a good scrubbing before I'll cuddle you again," I warned, despite knowing that the dog had no idea what I was saying.
He sat his rump down and gave my hand an extra wet lick. Gross.
My goodbyes to Nachtan were quick, him agitated to return home and me worried. "Tell Fedemid hello for me," I said absently and offered a hand.
That was ignored in favor of a bone-crushing hug. "Many thanks, happy to see you Galchobhar," he returned with a smile that lit up his broad face.
He and his people departed on foot with as much of Theodred's saddlebag provisions as he could convince them to take.
When I glanced in Theodred and Boromir's direction, they were frowning in the direction that the Senones had left in. "What's with that look on your face?" I asked either or both of them.
"I need to speak to my father about our treatment of the Wild Men-" Theodred caught himself and corrected, "The Senones." He grimaced. "That man was so thin, and I guess that he was one of the better off of them. Yet they were valiant and fought with us."
I shifted my eyes to Boromir, but he avoided me. "We should leave before more orcs arrive," he suggested brusquely, "I'll get the horse." He trudged heavily away to where Blitzen grazed on some unsoiled grass.
My heart dropped. Was he upset about the divorce? The marriage? Just tired after days and days of riding and fighting with little rest?
"What did Libby mean when she talked about a dee-vorse?" Theodred suddenly asked.
Did that not exist here? I wondered in a sudden near-panic. Or was it just that he was unfamiliar with the English word?
Theodred's bright eyes bored into me, demanding answers.
"You told us how we're apparently married, now is there a way to undo that?" I blurted out before I lost my nerve.
For a very long moment Theodred thought. Long enough that I wondered if he was going through the entire Rohirric law code in his head.
Antsy, I barely forced myself to stay still.
"There is," Theodred answered eventually, "However, I would caution you against using it."
At least the option was there, I thought with some measure of relief. "Why?" I asked.
He glanced in the direction that Boromir had gone. "I know my friend, and while I do not know you so well, I have an idea of your character. Ere long, you would both regret it," he said softly.
I rolled my eyes. Typical. He'd definitely be talking if Boromir asked.
"When the weddings are over, if you still feel the same, I will tell you then," Theodred warned, "It is very simple yet a very powerful thing, not to be done lightly."
This entire thing was one big mistake and that wasn't about to change. I supposed I could wait a couple of weeks on a divorce, though.
I searched out Boromir but he was on Blitzen's other side.
"Give this a chance. It is not often that such things happen by accident," Theodred advised. With an encouraging look he went to attend his own steed.
Perhaps he was right, I pondered. When Boromir and I weren't on opposing sides, we made quite the team. He made me laugh and I made him think.
At the same time, I wasn't about to live anywhere near Minas Tirith as long as Denethor was around and Boromir was needed so badly by so many people there. And I'm not exactly wife material, as Martin had pointed out years ago. Am I even the marrying type, beyond ridiculous accidents like this?
I wasn't sure and I fucking hated it.